tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-49405534137598969712024-03-13T13:38:31.385+13:00Great Fun etcAdventures on Life's Rollercoaster - parenting, parties, ideas and honesty (formerly Greatfun4kids)Simoneyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09554122579485306611noreply@blogger.comBlogger1226125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4940553413759896971.post-88019550879177813132022-12-31T13:31:00.020+13:002024-02-28T15:27:06.853+13:00Youth Mental Health Crisis - A Parent's Survival Guide<p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj64j4vGq0Dtxib187uE8EcKbHdUy2HH3w3fw_coz0PUhWeCQiBvBEWNwNGnIUMw3VZx66jsrNQ9zOzRGfR1-by_QXbSeQa8KAmuGl4q92dAVt-7Eph-NiUmtDN7D7WP0zdwZCc-_onlVy3PrJrNI_JDrKneLegDtTFVFU6dHsEKGUX_lY8ooGbBDKV/s4032/IMG_3060.jpeg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="3024" data-original-width="4032" height="480" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj64j4vGq0Dtxib187uE8EcKbHdUy2HH3w3fw_coz0PUhWeCQiBvBEWNwNGnIUMw3VZx66jsrNQ9zOzRGfR1-by_QXbSeQa8KAmuGl4q92dAVt-7Eph-NiUmtDN7D7WP0zdwZCc-_onlVy3PrJrNI_JDrKneLegDtTFVFU6dHsEKGUX_lY8ooGbBDKV/w640-h480/IMG_3060.jpeg" width="640" /></a></div><br />It has long been known that New Zealand has the <a href="https://mentalhealth.org.nz/suicide-prevention/statistics-on-suicide-in-new-zealand" target="_blank">worst youth suicide rate </a>of all 41 OECD nations - here in Godzone our young people are struggling. The pandemic has surely made things worse - isolation, disruption to lives, friendships, sports, and the added pressure of trying to learn online has heaped extra weight on our kids. So many young people are battling with hopelessness, overwhelm, suicidal thoughts, self-harm, depression and major anxiety. <p></p><p>Having a child who is struggling with their mental health, watching your precious kid in intense emotional and mental pain is surely one of the worst things a parent can go through. Knowing how to respond, how to help and support them through it can be a confusing and lonely struggle. (Sadly, there is still so much stigma around mental illness, and it can be hard to reach out for help).</p><p>I am writing this from the trenches, for fellow parents of young people who are struggling. For the past four years, this has been my battle too. And now finally, I can see clear water ahead, and feel like I can share what I've learned.</p><span></span><p><span></span></p><a name='more'></a><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhDYUkxe7g81kig6zmabLm2SRVmpU59VThTacszykofQAaquyVTWIhVf5tu0-ftKAThiyM0IoreasMgpnShXASywQ57wTgufHn2WGYhOS8Htl60FsT9rMpBSmiYrVu8d38RFhqfSYWDBTxBK-C_77Jw1hbKuAsvYqY1myzwHP2fsThn3PB5yhjkK9dE/s2048/IMG_3769.jpeg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1536" data-original-width="2048" height="480" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhDYUkxe7g81kig6zmabLm2SRVmpU59VThTacszykofQAaquyVTWIhVf5tu0-ftKAThiyM0IoreasMgpnShXASywQ57wTgufHn2WGYhOS8Htl60FsT9rMpBSmiYrVu8d38RFhqfSYWDBTxBK-C_77Jw1hbKuAsvYqY1myzwHP2fsThn3PB5yhjkK9dE/w640-h480/IMG_3769.jpeg" width="640" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div>I am not writing as any kind of clinical expert - but I have lived experience, I have tried all the things, and I have learned some keys along the way. <p></p><h2 style="text-align: left;"><span style="font-weight: normal;">Getting our heads around what it is</span></h2><p>Sometimes as parents we can mistake genuine mental health struggles for adolescent moodiness. It's easy to read lack of motivation, loss of interest in favourite activities and opting out of life as laziness, but in many cases, these are some of the first signs that our kids are struggling.</p><p>What causes it? There's no one thing that triggers a mental health slide; it's usually a combination of:</p><p></p><ul style="text-align: left;"><li>mental overwhelm</li><li>emotional trauma</li><li>battles with self-esteem, body image, social issues, identity</li><li>a feeling of hopelessness and believing that things won't change</li><li>a loss of control over their lives - feeling backed into a corner</li></ul><p></p><p>Our kids who are neuro-divergent seem to be more at-risk than others, and kids who have experienced significant or prolonged trauma (e.g. abuse, family violence, bullying) are even more at-risk.</p><p>Some kids are expert at masking their mental health struggles in front of peers and teachers, but let it all out at home. </p><p>One of my kids did this for nearly two years, which we now refer to as "white-knuckling it". Nobody had a clue they were struggling; at school, they were the life of the party. At home they were withdrawn, moody, their emotions on a hair trigger. I thought it was just an unpleasant case of puberty blues and didn't read the signs right. Until one day they called me from a school bathroom in the middle of a panic attack and asked me to come get them. On the car ride home, they admitted that they'd been struggling for ages and had self-diagnosed using the <a href="http://depression.org.nz" target="_blank">depression.org.nz</a> quiz as having depression and anxiety. On New Year's Eve 2019 they attempted to take their life - "I just can't take another year doing it all over again mum. I just don't have it in me..." </p><p>White-knuckling it for nearly two years had burnt up all their inner resources and so began a three-year battle to keep this kid alive.</p><p>I missed the signs. You might have missed the signs. So here they are.</p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjSBxmuo1WbaNPTAnmepTjT_5iXpeo3o_KNY-KYm4cPVMO8s-g_eCn-A2na6I96YS_-1QKEixFiHHqrihME4L9vE09xJhv-BveNx-WdKj12rBExfrvWpGFf5chpx_vvZnj9wzHpQ8d6RaNWSLX49gVM_E9LUR9i8oIxyVrRWfNPGH7iIsPbwcFbDqnb/s2000/warning-road-sign-road-red-circle-yellow-color-danger-ahead_116317-4848.webp" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1333" data-original-width="2000" height="426" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjSBxmuo1WbaNPTAnmepTjT_5iXpeo3o_KNY-KYm4cPVMO8s-g_eCn-A2na6I96YS_-1QKEixFiHHqrihME4L9vE09xJhv-BveNx-WdKj12rBExfrvWpGFf5chpx_vvZnj9wzHpQ8d6RaNWSLX49gVM_E9LUR9i8oIxyVrRWfNPGH7iIsPbwcFbDqnb/w640-h426/warning-road-sign-road-red-circle-yellow-color-danger-ahead_116317-4848.webp" width="640" /></a></div><p><b>The Signs </b>(from <a href="https://suicideprevention.nv.gov/Youth/Depression/" target="_blank">Suicide Prevention Website</a>):</p><div class="row" style="box-sizing: border-box; color: #212529; display: flex; flex-wrap: wrap; font-family: -apple-system, BlinkMacSystemFont, "Segoe UI", Roboto, "Helvetica Neue", Arial, sans-serif, "Apple Color Emoji", "Segoe UI Emoji", "Segoe UI Symbol", "Noto Color Emoji"; font-size: 16px; margin-left: -15px; margin-right: -15px;"><div class="col-12" style="box-sizing: border-box; flex: 0 0 100%; max-width: 100%; min-height: 1px; padding-left: 15px; padding-right: 15px; position: relative; width: 970px;"><ul style="box-sizing: border-box; margin-bottom: 1rem; margin-top: 0px;"><li style="box-sizing: border-box;"><span style="box-sizing: border-box; font-size: 10pt;">Lack of energy and/or motivation</span></li><li style="box-sizing: border-box;"><span style="box-sizing: border-box; font-size: 10pt;">Temper outbursts and/or violent episodes</span></li><li style="box-sizing: border-box;"><span style="box-sizing: border-box; font-size: 10pt;">Easily irritated</span></li><li style="box-sizing: border-box;"><span style="box-sizing: border-box; font-size: 10pt;">Sleeping too little or too much</span></li><li style="box-sizing: border-box;"><span style="box-sizing: border-box; font-size: 10pt;">Little or no appetite, or eating too often</span></li><li style="box-sizing: border-box;"><span style="box-sizing: border-box; font-size: 10pt;">Withdrawal from friends and family</span></li><li style="box-sizing: border-box;"><span style="box-sizing: border-box; font-size: 10pt;">Loss of interest in activities usually enjoyed (including school activities)</span></li><li style="box-sizing: border-box;"><span style="box-sizing: border-box; font-size: 10pt;">Feelings of fear (even if there is no conscious reason)</span></li><li style="box-sizing: border-box;"><span style="box-sizing: border-box; font-size: 10pt;">Feelings of extreme guilt or shame</span></li><li style="box-sizing: border-box;"><span style="box-sizing: border-box; font-size: 10pt;">Sadness (with or without crying)</span></li><li style="box-sizing: border-box;"><span style="box-sizing: border-box; font-size: 10pt;">Anxiety</span></li><li style="box-sizing: border-box;"><span style="box-sizing: border-box; font-size: 10pt;">Inability to concentrate</span></li><li style="box-sizing: border-box;"><span style="box-sizing: border-box; font-size: 10pt;">Poor memory</span></li><li style="box-sizing: border-box;"><span style="box-sizing: border-box; font-size: 10pt;">Increased use of alcohol or drugs (self medicating)</span></li><li style="box-sizing: border-box;"><span style="box-sizing: border-box; font-size: 10pt;">Worsening grades</span></li><li style="box-sizing: border-box;"><span style="box-sizing: border-box; font-size: 10pt;">Skipping school or classes</span></li><li style="box-sizing: border-box;"><span style="box-sizing: border-box; font-size: 10pt;">Self-critical remarks</span></li><li style="box-sizing: border-box;"><span style="box-sizing: border-box; font-size: 10pt;">Feelings of helplessness to change a situation*</span></li><li style="box-sizing: border-box;"><span style="box-sizing: border-box; font-size: 10pt;">Feelings that things will never get better*</span></li><li style="box-sizing: border-box;"><span style="box-sizing: border-box; font-size: 10pt;">Comment(s) about death or dying*</span></li><li style="box-sizing: border-box;"><span style="box-sizing: border-box; font-size: 10pt;">Writing, drawing, or listening to music about hopelessness or death*</span></li><li style="box-sizing: border-box;"><span style="box-sizing: border-box; font-size: 10pt;">Threatening suicide (even in a joking manner)*</span></li></ul><p style="box-sizing: border-box; margin-bottom: 1rem; margin-top: 0px;"></p></div></div><div class="row" style="box-sizing: border-box; color: #212529; display: flex; flex-wrap: wrap; font-family: -apple-system, BlinkMacSystemFont, "Segoe UI", Roboto, "Helvetica Neue", Arial, sans-serif, "Apple Color Emoji", "Segoe UI Emoji", "Segoe UI Symbol", "Noto Color Emoji"; font-size: 16px; margin-left: -15px; margin-right: -15px;"><div class="col-12" style="box-sizing: border-box; flex: 0 0 100%; max-width: 100%; min-height: 1px; padding-left: 15px; padding-right: 15px; position: relative; width: 970px;"><p style="box-sizing: border-box; margin-bottom: 1rem; margin-top: 0px;">When 4 or more of the above are observed or suspected for more than 2 weeks take action.</p></div></div><div class="row" style="-webkit-text-stroke-width: 0px; box-sizing: border-box; color: #212529; display: flex; flex-wrap: wrap; font-family: -apple-system, BlinkMacSystemFont, "Segoe UI", Roboto, "Helvetica Neue", Arial, sans-serif, "Apple Color Emoji", "Segoe UI Emoji", "Segoe UI Symbol", "Noto Color Emoji"; font-size: 16px; font-style: normal; font-variant-caps: normal; font-variant-ligatures: normal; font-weight: 400; letter-spacing: normal; margin-left: -15px; margin-right: -15px; orphans: 2; text-align: left; text-decoration-color: initial; text-decoration-style: initial; text-decoration-thickness: initial; text-indent: 0px; text-transform: none; white-space: normal; widows: 2; word-spacing: 0px;"><div class="col-12" style="box-sizing: border-box; flex: 0 0 100%; max-width: 100%; min-height: 1px; padding-left: 15px; padding-right: 15px; position: relative; width: 970px;"><p style="box-sizing: border-box; margin-bottom: 1rem; margin-top: 0px;"><strong style="box-sizing: border-box; font-weight: bolder;">*Any time one or more of the last 5 signs or symptoms are seen or suspected, immediate attention is necessary</strong></p></div></div><h2 style="text-align: left;"><table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><tbody><tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://www.rnz.co.nz/news/national/457773/terrible-gaps-in-mental-health-system-for-youth-and-children" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;" target="_blank"><img border="0" data-original-height="656" data-original-width="1050" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiR97E0ibvr_BOMgp2jp--mWZ_mPq7I-qOt6SiqD0kST-YdWZaqE2yGq7PexczOlEBOV_GcL-agr9MtXCgNh4Olmo3bNuJYXoI9_nAWkD1O_Vc47xRs0uP7AVKRcHIEU4Vwcb_txVe9jWqEhcX0uHPc2ZePS78NKgjG3XmEEuhOSIVkOVjyuMVoFnlS/w640-h400/4LZMOIL_copyright_image_282812.jpeg" width="640" /></a></td></tr><tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://www.rnz.co.nz/news/national/457773/terrible-gaps-in-mental-health-system-for-youth-and-children" target="_blank">Source</a></td></tr></tbody></table></h2><h2 style="text-align: left;"><span style="font-weight: normal;">Navigating the overloaded Mental Health System </span></h2><p>Our mental health services are <a href="https://www.rnz.co.nz/news/national/457773/terrible-gaps-in-mental-health-system-for-youth-and-children" target="_blank">overloaded in this mental health epidemic</a>; it was inadequate and underfunded to begin with and even though the Government promised $1.2 billion towards mental health, none of that money seems to have made any difference so far.</p><p><b>Medication:</b></p><p>When you are struggling with significant depression and/or anxiety, appropriate medication helps an awful lot, to stabilise/even you out. I know lots of people are against medicating kids, but for me, the first priority is "keep my kid alive". When medication works, it makes a huge difference - the way putting a cast on a broken leg holds the bones straight so the body can heal itself. Medication helps hold the thoughts straight so things like counselling and other tools can do their work. But getting access to it for teenagers is tricky. If kids are under 18, they have to be seen by a Psychiatrist to be prescribed medication.</p><p><b>Accessing Mental Health Support:</b></p><p>The usual way to access Mental Health services is through your GP. Once you become aware your kid is struggling, take them to your doctor who will make a referral. The good thing about the public service is that it's completely free. The bad thing is that the system is overloaded.</p><p>Waiting lists for public mental health services are ridiculously long, and unless they deem your kid at imminent risk, you'll probably have to wait for months to even be assessed. If you're rich (or know someone who is) you can alternatively pay megabucks to see a private psychiatrist, but even then there is a waiting list due to the current mental health crisis. </p><p>I have navigated public mental health services for two of my children on multiple occasions and I have learned that when your kid is in crisis (self-harming/suicidal threats) you can access help most quickly by:</p><p></p><p></p><ul style="text-align: left;"><li>turning up at the emergency room with them</li><li>calling the Mental Health crisis team in your area (google the number) and telling them all the scary things they are saying (if it's concerning enough they will expedite an assessment)</li><li>calling the Police (111) i.e. if they have barricaded themselves in their room and you have concerns for their safety. Our NZ Police are actually amazing at de-escalating situations and are trained for this stuff. If you're worried, call them. They can also expedite a referral in the system and help get your kid seen a bit faster (depending on the risk level).</li></ul><p></p><p>I have had to do all these things to try and get help, with mixed results. The quality of care in the public health system depends on who you get - there are some dinosaurs in the system who are burnt out and lack empathy; there are also some wonderful people who genuinely care.</p><p>The worst one was the public psychiatrist who told one of my kids, "Well, we've tried all the medications we have available for you, and since nothing seems to help, I recommend just getting on with it and living your life the best you can." To a suicidal teenager. Thanks for giving them hope, Doc.</p><p>In the end, dad offered to pay for a private psychiatrist, who gave an accurate diagnosis and put them on the right medication. That was the beginning of things starting to improve for that child.</p><p><b>Counselling:</b></p><p>Finding someone your kid can talk to definitely needs to be part of the healing process. This is probably best to come later once they are stable. There are many different services out there, but sometimes it's hard to know where to begin to find a good counsellor, and counselling is expensive. </p><p>Each of my kids have benefited from the amazing <a href="https://www.gumbootfriday.org.nz/get-a-counsellor" target="_blank">I Am Hope free counselling service</a> funded by Gumboot Friday. This genius service is provided free for anyone under 25. You choose from the hundreds of registered counsellors by reading the bios on the website and make contact with the one you like the look of directly through the enquiry form. Within a day or two your kid will be talking to a counsellor - Gumboot Friday picks up the bill for the first three sessions. You can <a href="https://www.workandincome.govt.nz/eligibility/health-and-disability/counselling.html" target="_blank">apply to WINZ </a>for financial assistance with counselling costs in the meantime.</p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEic-IMBlyoWAp1-BxWCM_CeEkG-CNLyUY1Pi0iSnv3mbogHfRTY8XZK21sH0xvqZX0XyQ9M_7Q5d2chNT_9X3coHKzXtnPEYuJ82UlhU7afUHF62ORG3riPFkvYWpMcwEj3tRajJXaJrcsKzTkpgJGskw1bDSPrtVxF-dNW-nh26FbCFsSsaDh6z63E/s2048/IMG_3495.jpeg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1536" data-original-width="2048" height="480" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEic-IMBlyoWAp1-BxWCM_CeEkG-CNLyUY1Pi0iSnv3mbogHfRTY8XZK21sH0xvqZX0XyQ9M_7Q5d2chNT_9X3coHKzXtnPEYuJ82UlhU7afUHF62ORG3riPFkvYWpMcwEj3tRajJXaJrcsKzTkpgJGskw1bDSPrtVxF-dNW-nh26FbCFsSsaDh6z63E/w640-h480/IMG_3495.jpeg" width="640" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><h2 style="text-align: left;"><span style="font-weight: normal;">What We Can Do as Parents</span></h2><p>I remember the moment that I realised it was up to me to keep my kid alive, the system didn't have any answers for us. It was scary. I was on suicide watch, and the best advice the helpful people at the Mental Health Service gave me was "hide all the sharp things" and keep a close eye on my kid. It was a dark, scary moment.</p><p>How do I get my kid to want to stick around? If they are determined to end it, they will bide their time and find a way. So the trick is to help them see life as something they want to live. That became my goal. </p><h3 style="text-align: left;">1. Adjust our own attitudes</h3><p>As parents we naturally have high hopes for our kids. When we held our newborns we dreamt all the possibilities - there were no limits to what this little bundle could do one day, and surely, with our encouragement and support they would succeed in life because we were going to get it right as parents. All the things our parents didn't do for us? We were going to do all those things. Our kid was never going to end up in therapy talking about how we messed them up - right?</p><p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg5D9ye_zjHpcPZ2BzWLKTdHubHLYbuEpgB4dVxsTwzqbyHOiQbg-8KjYoYZLnsEDG8W7cZS2Vh6ZH898VvSW2Hk6UauaDNI-mnyYT108zeCLPY43VEJKQJ5pTHuwrGrFxfmIJ0X2m-5QzxWk545diA7D5FH_QMqlRsUoM3oaVu66GRrUAqQ1z6dO5w/s960/IMG_2732.JPG" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="960" data-original-width="714" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg5D9ye_zjHpcPZ2BzWLKTdHubHLYbuEpgB4dVxsTwzqbyHOiQbg-8KjYoYZLnsEDG8W7cZS2Vh6ZH898VvSW2Hk6UauaDNI-mnyYT108zeCLPY43VEJKQJ5pTHuwrGrFxfmIJ0X2m-5QzxWk545diA7D5FH_QMqlRsUoM3oaVu66GRrUAqQ1z6dO5w/s320/IMG_2732.JPG" width="238" /></a></div>And now we are here with a child who is struggling in the worst possible way. We might be blaming ourselves and beating. ourselves up - where did we go wrong?<p></p><p>We might be blaming others - their other parent, their teachers, the bullies at their school.</p><p>We might be secretly blaming them - what is so defective in them that they feel this way? Why aren't they coping with school/life? (Can't they just toughen up?)</p><p>Blame has no place here. It's not about whose fault it is, blaming is not going to help you or them.</p><p>We might also be struggling with internalised stigma around mental illness. We might be feeling shame, embarrassment, fear of others' judgement. We need to realise that there is no shame. And others' opinions and judgements don't matter one bit.</p><p>We need to silence all these negative internal voices, tell them to shut up and go away (as many times as necessary). Because this is a battle for the very life of our child, and as their parent we CAN make a huge difference in how this turns out.</p><p>We are not experts, clinicians or psychiatrists, but we are uniquely placed to be the one that never gives up on our kid, even - especially - when they have given up on themselves.</p><p>We have to focus on THIS battle for the life of our kid, not waste our energy battling those unimportant things.</p><p>We need to realise that we are not alone in this struggle - there is no shame in it. So many other parents are also fighting this same fight for their kids. And feeling just as alone. We need to find them. You probably already know a bunch of them, but just don't realise you're in the same fight. </p><p>So silence shame, silence blame. Find allies, arm yourself with knowledge, join online support groups, become the squeaky wheel that gets the oil, become the advocate for your kid, the parent that annoys the mental health service until you have knocked on every door to get the resources and support you need to stay strong and be there to fight for your kid. You can do this.</p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj1VjH31Gm4vE7DMsaa-3J2LF1NYhwTFwDeaU90N1p1gySB0U2wMfbimg0Q_J40J5Lcvzzedh0Q-8GmrIrK87lWiW4RSVYcDI4UuufBe0zJOWiCxrtLBbMRcMVH_e9v0SBNpvcnG1BnLkV5IFx3eOOVUmJVNJ4HmgldCWGXYjSI_Bpe88q3GhP_cr_O/s2048/IMG_2955.JPEG" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1536" data-original-width="2048" height="480" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj1VjH31Gm4vE7DMsaa-3J2LF1NYhwTFwDeaU90N1p1gySB0U2wMfbimg0Q_J40J5Lcvzzedh0Q-8GmrIrK87lWiW4RSVYcDI4UuufBe0zJOWiCxrtLBbMRcMVH_e9v0SBNpvcnG1BnLkV5IFx3eOOVUmJVNJ4HmgldCWGXYjSI_Bpe88q3GhP_cr_O/w640-h480/IMG_2955.JPEG" width="640" /></a></div><h3 style="text-align: left;"><b>2. Remove the pressure</b></h3><p>This is the big one - mental/emotional overwhelm and a feeling of hopelessness is huge in this scenario. The treadmill of school, study, exams and expectations can be a significant stressor and the worry of "what am I going to do with my life" can be a very big weight our kids carry. </p><p>As parents, we need to remove the expectations for our kids to stay on a pathway to a life they don't want to live, that feels impossible to them. The most important thing is that they are alive and that they want to live. </p><p>Opting out of "normal" school might feel (to both them and you) that it's copping out or failure. But by prioritising their mental health, and giving them the mental breathing room to get well, you will increase their ability to bounce back quicker. There are other options and other pathways for the kid battling anxiety, panic attacks and major depression, who can't cope in the school environment. There are pathways like Correspondence Schooling (100% free entry for students over 16), free youth courses (in smaller learning environments, once they are better) and bridging courses to University if they decide that is what they want to do later on. </p><p>Put the reins in their hands - let them know that we support them in designing the kind of life they want to live. They don't have to follow a prescribed path. The most important thing right now is that they get their joy in life back. I've done this with both of my older kids in different ways. </p><b><br />My Experience:</b><p></p><p>One kid managed to get Level 2 NCEA before the mental health crisis (and the lockdowns) derailed them. One of the things that anchored this kid was their sport, so they stayed in school to play sport and be with friends, but the pressure of trying to get Level 3 was taken off them. Since then, they have worked a number of jobs before finally settling on a career path and enrolling in a sports training programme. But the most important thing is that they have built up their inner resources, gained tools for coping with their anxiety and are now able to go out and live their life, and bounce back from difficulties. </p><p>The other kid couldn't cope with school at all; the noise, the crowd of 3000 teenagers, the overstimulation caused massive panic attacks whenever they attempted to re-enter. We ended up putting schooling on the back burner until the major depressive disorder, social anxiety and generalised anxiety disorders were under control, but they did take up their favourite childhood sport again, and this helped build confidence, give them a goal and an outlet, and increase social contact at a manageable level.</p><p>Eventually they completed a youth training course and gained enough Level 2 credits for NCEA. As their confidence and coping skills built, they were able to take on a part-time job. They are now not just competing but coaching in their sport, and working part-time. They have a great work-life balance, and the tools and inner resources to cope with setbacks and manage their anxiety without white-knuckling it. </p><p>Both kids still deal with anxiety on a daily basis but they have a life they want to live and the tools to live it. </p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiSYs27QdCH9T2sF7rftSQJoNMQY7CnkUavq2mr7Jd1BqYmI0mkfsE7su2BlqV2bezgCYD6SWHNtENPburvQNlELMCCa2A9LQq1luT9Mx-z0FvX08nPlIjW6D31SEu58Y3SfUarfuhmk4V-8onmNfWtUE8rasBHj3U9k7r2y24g4_GSAxPzJHky6yYY/s2048/IMG_4524.jpeg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1536" data-original-width="2048" height="480" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiSYs27QdCH9T2sF7rftSQJoNMQY7CnkUavq2mr7Jd1BqYmI0mkfsE7su2BlqV2bezgCYD6SWHNtENPburvQNlELMCCa2A9LQq1luT9Mx-z0FvX08nPlIjW6D31SEu58Y3SfUarfuhmk4V-8onmNfWtUE8rasBHj3U9k7r2y24g4_GSAxPzJHky6yYY/w640-h480/IMG_4524.jpeg" width="640" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><h3 style="text-align: left;">3. Help them find an anchor</h3><p>Having something or someone worth sticking around for is a critical part of helping our kids find reasons to live. I know this to be true in my own case - when I was struggling with my own mental health battle, it was my kids that kept me here.</p><p>Knowing this, I wanted to give my struggling kid something similar, so I got them a puppy of their own. This puppy became my child's anchor. An endless source of laughter, unconditional love and a distraction from spiralling thoughts. The puppy was depending on my child to walk her, bath her, feed her. Later on, my child told me that the puppy helped them get through that endless lockdown in 2021. "Without her, mum, I don't know if I would have survived it..."</p><p>A puppy isn't the answer for everyone - although it is proven that animals have a wonderfully therapeutic effect; snuggling them lowers the heart rate in people with anxiety. </p><p>Whatever might be an anchor for your kid - a sport, a hobby, a friendship, a travel goal - encourage and support that thing whatever it is. </p><p>I can't recommend sport enough - if your child loved sport but lost interest, try to encourage them to take it up again. Sport has so so many benefits:</p><p></p><ul style="text-align: left;"><li>physical activity releases endorphins and helps with mood</li><li>team sport provides positive social contact, reducing isolation</li><li> sport provides structure & purpose e.g. regular training sessions, team games which give them something simple to aim for.</li></ul><h2 style="text-align: left;"></h2><h3 style="text-align: left;"><span style="font-size: 18.72px;"><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjF2sOGMBynblhg7y5h5Pk9SB04ZbTbVLUqLQpMuWNsRZaDxI1jw6lXn51t7OJz4ny79NhAq6dX02VRQ8YhVro0Yh8zRRYSFbq2QzN-2MtBKbDo_pgHs2tFznMLCDuQAv26DzP_TwnorEj4FQvIeiWmthz5osHdwP72tEgswcndXS8h9Vv4aURjQXlt/s1486/view%20back%20down%20the%20hill.jpg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1058" data-original-width="1486" height="456" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjF2sOGMBynblhg7y5h5Pk9SB04ZbTbVLUqLQpMuWNsRZaDxI1jw6lXn51t7OJz4ny79NhAq6dX02VRQ8YhVro0Yh8zRRYSFbq2QzN-2MtBKbDo_pgHs2tFznMLCDuQAv26DzP_TwnorEj4FQvIeiWmthz5osHdwP72tEgswcndXS8h9Vv4aURjQXlt/w640-h456/view%20back%20down%20the%20hill.jpg" width="640" /></a></div><br />4. Look back</span></h3><div>If you've ever climbed a hill, you might know that moment when you feel like you can't take another step. You've been sloggin away, one foot in front of another and you still aren't at the top. Everything aches, your heart is racing, breath ragged - you're done in. And then you pause to catch your breath, and look back at how far you've actually climbed - wow! Look at the view! You're higher up than you realised! Motivation renewed, you find you can carry on after all.</div><div><br /></div><div>Looking back at how far we've come is really helpful on this journey - regularly reminding our kids of the progress they've made. They can be so hard on themselves, lacking the resilience to bounce back from disappointments, so taking stock/looking back at our progress is something I do regularly with my kids. When they are bemoaning their current struggles I point out to them the things they are now doing that they once considered too hard.</div><div>We remember back to this time last year when they had never had a job, thought they'd never get their license, hadn't successfully navigated public transport etc. We reflect on all the progress, big and small, and wow, does it lift their spirits, every time. </div>These types of conversations now happen frequently - "looking back" is in our toolkit.<div><br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjG78eJpS8KnOM491QcnOQn2-7cIyCyaqUoBuh7xRLHFlxYNnUO-SqSuY7DZi0IQC231L_Pos71F4OT9l5PBi1-2tLpp-w2anibzPqdL2zvYgCM4Y2NoGGf9XzGIoobafCCmkgx0Zh1ClwiP_YWUhZS5D2Cuzkp7vbSfqceZV9TW4KXMXT6S0G5R9RZ/s1000/IMG_3357.JPG" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1000" data-original-width="1000" height="640" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjG78eJpS8KnOM491QcnOQn2-7cIyCyaqUoBuh7xRLHFlxYNnUO-SqSuY7DZi0IQC231L_Pos71F4OT9l5PBi1-2tLpp-w2anibzPqdL2zvYgCM4Y2NoGGf9XzGIoobafCCmkgx0Zh1ClwiP_YWUhZS5D2Cuzkp7vbSfqceZV9TW4KXMXT6S0G5R9RZ/w640-h640/IMG_3357.JPG" width="640" /></a></div><h2 style="text-align: left;"><span style="font-weight: normal;">Keep in Mind</span></h2><p style="text-align: left;"></p><ol style="text-align: left;"><li>This can be a long haul - three steps forward two steps back</li><li>One good day doesn't mean we are out of the woods yet; one bad day doesn't mean we're back where we started</li><li>Eventually the good days will string together and the bad days will be less frequent</li><li>This is probably the hardest thing you've ever done</li><li>You need support, laughter, friends, prayers, encouragement to keep going - look after yourself and reach out for help</li></ol><div>There is honestly so much more to say and this post is already waaay too long. Most of all what I want to leave with you is that there is hope. And that we as parents can be part of the answer. If we adjust our expectations, love our kids relentlessly and refuse to give up on them.</div><div><br /></div><div>They might be thoroughly unlikeable for a while. You might wake up every morning with a sick knot of dread in your gut. </div><div><br /></div><div>Hang in there. Hold on to HOPE. </div><div>When our kids have no hope for their future, we must hold it for them. When our kids can't see things improving or imagine themselves happy again, we have to see it for them. Speak words of life over them, to them and about them. Remind them how far they've come - they are still here and you are with them.</div><div><i><br /></i></div><div><span style="font-family: courier;">Kia Kaha.</span></div><p></p><p></p></div>Simoneyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09554122579485306611noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4940553413759896971.post-89715517459305478922022-11-19T12:48:00.020+13:002022-11-19T13:38:04.456+13:0053 and Grateful...<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg0qgMhF-7t1UsvSFA7VWpOr_SaIKiefeY4ZgnvPYZIsbfxXTuuAsG8Nn8UXkqF2WzYGU3lRVyPAq7ZMLOaUeYtvFMoM3FQQyZyWdqq9fsIjHLZ5Wbei-tLQsHuu3BQuZ734-vjmIyjDHeAEhZ7WnZIr_jmgUPPDVKTLzaDn4pYO6rqLLLAa6H-jttq/s2048/IMG_0778.jpeg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1536" data-original-width="2048" height="480" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg0qgMhF-7t1UsvSFA7VWpOr_SaIKiefeY4ZgnvPYZIsbfxXTuuAsG8Nn8UXkqF2WzYGU3lRVyPAq7ZMLOaUeYtvFMoM3FQQyZyWdqq9fsIjHLZ5Wbei-tLQsHuu3BQuZ734-vjmIyjDHeAEhZ7WnZIr_jmgUPPDVKTLzaDn4pYO6rqLLLAa6H-jttq/w640-h480/IMG_0778.jpeg" width="640" /></a></div><p style="text-align: left;">I am fifty-three years old today. Yep, it's my birthday and I am content.</p><p></p><p style="text-align: left;">To my faithful readers, sorry I haven't written on my blog for nearly a whole year, even though there are many deep stories I want to share. Some are not quite finished baking yet. But in the meantime, before I go a whole 365 days without writing, I want to share a situation status update.</p><p style="text-align: left;">Today on my 53rd birthday I feel rich, even though there's only $5.43 in my bank account (Monday is payday, we'll make it stretch.)</p><p style="text-align: left;">I am so grateful for where I am at right now...</p><span><a name='more'></a></span><p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhwEpxokdY0PwsXoKdMKPrkt3tpIQfyYOr0vsARCVlDkgEt6kHY9eVlcn1bHLYsPPQIM7xD88DbUBnI7dz0A41cY1mNDNLhhXTC5e-az7AwZ0cmBBgtVfUeO5OHekkTl-0arOXK1eiXhpjIefO4POZiyGatH72WjRoWdzH7RYxxX0mjHFn5Tb_COymM/s2048/IMG_4407.jpeg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1536" data-original-width="2048" height="480" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhwEpxokdY0PwsXoKdMKPrkt3tpIQfyYOr0vsARCVlDkgEt6kHY9eVlcn1bHLYsPPQIM7xD88DbUBnI7dz0A41cY1mNDNLhhXTC5e-az7AwZ0cmBBgtVfUeO5OHekkTl-0arOXK1eiXhpjIefO4POZiyGatH72WjRoWdzH7RYxxX0mjHFn5Tb_COymM/w640-h480/IMG_4407.jpeg" width="640" /></a></div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: left;">So grateful for my three beloved kids (seen here being dorks in a parking building). Three giant teenagers, towering over me. This birthday they have showered me with love, but the coolest thing is that it's not just one day. I feel like I have truly great relationships with each of them. We talk. (They talk, I listen. Sometimes they ask for my advice!)</div><p></p><p style="text-align: left;">I like them as people. When I think of them, and the things they said to me last night as we sat around the table for sausies and soda on my Birthday Eve... warm glow in chest. My top Love Language is "words of affirmation", so they poured out those words, filling my cup. </p><p style="text-align: left;">I told them, "I feel so sad for all those other mamas who don't get to have you guys for their kids."</p><p style="text-align: left;"> "Mum, you always say that!" Yeah, <i>cos it's true</i>.</p><p style="text-align: left;">Now, I am not saying that these are perfect kids, no. There are many struggles, we have had to battle to get where we are now. But that just makes this all the sweeter.</p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi_yP39lxtMe88iGoNWnOmD5BjCH6Jqn9q6XqdxoKFNvfhObVKn02b6YGExygHGB3M-kW1KdbqUXZ53Ow5a2XaW8ouyPYPBvoIsa6rNA3wY4twavWswMrb5qTMm1da2WOqX_AK5NjuwaF4ylb3kMk9qFmiUXCieMEhuz96JOU69Hv3upvyX5t3kT2Q4/s2048/IMG_4218.JPEG" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1536" data-original-width="2048" height="480" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi_yP39lxtMe88iGoNWnOmD5BjCH6Jqn9q6XqdxoKFNvfhObVKn02b6YGExygHGB3M-kW1KdbqUXZ53Ow5a2XaW8ouyPYPBvoIsa6rNA3wY4twavWswMrb5qTMm1da2WOqX_AK5NjuwaF4ylb3kMk9qFmiUXCieMEhuz96JOU69Hv3upvyX5t3kT2Q4/w640-h480/IMG_4218.JPEG" width="640" /></a></div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: left;">Grateful for my amazing friends. A few of "the girls" are coming over tonight for simple drinks and nibbles. They are the best, there's been so much love, honesty, grit and generosity in my life thanks to my friends. You know who you are.</div><p style="text-align: left;">And my work - six and a half years in grant writing for a few different charities, but my current job is more like a calling, and my workmates are more like family. I get up every day and work in a place with a sea view, and the best bunch of people ever.</p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj9Pd2-jhWtaV35HFwdBwKFwh-tZb5QY4Gg7oDCPZkVRShs2dedG81eqjwA15ohvyGw8vES-IdsxdC-zHJiToF1hxqpNUmLy4sb7rR7JSeEonNj9EsKNlSTvD_7OyspWNsGRmAp5UyEkSPq_zxwtAbG6J8eeIkjO1V_g6OL9thHOTnRINAcGIWyUVml/s960/IMG_4041.JPG" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="720" data-original-width="960" height="480" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj9Pd2-jhWtaV35HFwdBwKFwh-tZb5QY4Gg7oDCPZkVRShs2dedG81eqjwA15ohvyGw8vES-IdsxdC-zHJiToF1hxqpNUmLy4sb7rR7JSeEonNj9EsKNlSTvD_7OyspWNsGRmAp5UyEkSPq_zxwtAbG6J8eeIkjO1V_g6OL9thHOTnRINAcGIWyUVml/w640-h480/IMG_4041.JPG" width="640" /></a></div><p style="text-align: left;">In no particular order I am also grateful for:</p><p style="text-align: left;">My parents (who have fought off illness and injury in recent years, but are still starry-eyed in-love with each other. My youngest says he hopes to one day have the kind of love Nan and Grandad have.)</p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi8rRibxquAMwhbE_RnwKGHlByB1bQKojDTOJ76AQuaVORfyBipN8IKNCZJDPcjHgGeuBgJ71zNVwcgcj90iIkUiA7Sg2V9JR3hLbveYPx_QB2gbXpOIKJSGYUHqSZzP7Z8h6B82YTpAxmn1Ua96oF3WaSXJpRWfijKsY7HGkZzdSUPOWu6GwLMMYAZ/s2048/IMG_4541.JPEG" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1536" data-original-width="2048" height="480" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi8rRibxquAMwhbE_RnwKGHlByB1bQKojDTOJ76AQuaVORfyBipN8IKNCZJDPcjHgGeuBgJ71zNVwcgcj90iIkUiA7Sg2V9JR3hLbveYPx_QB2gbXpOIKJSGYUHqSZzP7Z8h6B82YTpAxmn1Ua96oF3WaSXJpRWfijKsY7HGkZzdSUPOWu6GwLMMYAZ/w640-h480/IMG_4541.JPEG" width="640" /></a></div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: left;">My stupid doggies. Even though both of them fart up the place constantly, and the little one still eats my special sh*t when she's bored. So. Many. Cushions.</div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiL4AwIdtRlyM5eP0anreuqxNPLkXAplHBsrnTNf9APzx-EplqdMeYL7Y7QoVTMsM0lDRcxcNOkUtKijZYrUH8yiJMupWg8lTJUtlCFdXp4vaOFNFtUcmVXMmIvE4DuDAbgLnVCjESWs-ih-dtAy0EzxXH0bg2cwIoDtDjMbWm7tPJciM0nvhNa2xMj/s2420/Image1.jpeg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1816" data-original-width="2420" height="480" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiL4AwIdtRlyM5eP0anreuqxNPLkXAplHBsrnTNf9APzx-EplqdMeYL7Y7QoVTMsM0lDRcxcNOkUtKijZYrUH8yiJMupWg8lTJUtlCFdXp4vaOFNFtUcmVXMmIvE4DuDAbgLnVCjESWs-ih-dtAy0EzxXH0bg2cwIoDtDjMbWm7tPJciM0nvhNa2xMj/w640-h480/Image1.jpeg" width="640" /></a></div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: left;">My home. How blessed that in a housing crisis I have an actually affordable mortgage, on a home I love. With character, light, space. And a garden that somebody else tends. (A neighbour loves gardening but has no garden; I have a garden but suck at gardening. She gardens, I have flowers. We are both happy).</div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgAIlFGb7XqwdkC1toi_PlHvSBxI55RKrOUGavkrzojlTOznJTM8y-LiIqQp9RWHkwquqP7vesku93qEn9SSK5lbc-j3UEkHsLjhS6AiVGzlJOorl_D5C43PvjaxBed3qziYWRJgQY87np3fbiwfLYaHypIFbmBIbFM-sevS_GoKZffTmo2cQf3g0B3/s2000/Image%203.jpeg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1501" data-original-width="2000" height="480" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgAIlFGb7XqwdkC1toi_PlHvSBxI55RKrOUGavkrzojlTOznJTM8y-LiIqQp9RWHkwquqP7vesku93qEn9SSK5lbc-j3UEkHsLjhS6AiVGzlJOorl_D5C43PvjaxBed3qziYWRJgQY87np3fbiwfLYaHypIFbmBIbFM-sevS_GoKZffTmo2cQf3g0B3/w640-h480/Image%203.jpeg" width="640" /></a></div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: justify;"><span style="text-align: left;">My faith. It has been deconstructed down to the ground and is slowly, slowly being reconstructed into something that is real and genuine, without all the religious frills. God has never let me down - people have, but not Him. The Jesus I see in the Gospels is somebody worth following. I like him, I love him. (And I also love </span><a href="https://watch.angelstudios.com/thechosen" style="text-align: left;" target="_blank">The Chosen</a><span style="text-align: left;">. Season 3 is nearly here!)</span></div><div style="text-align: justify;"><span style="text-align: left;"><br /></span></div><p style="text-align: left;">My mental health. All the battles with depression, anxiety, ADHD, trauma - me and my kids - have taken the best part of the last six years. We have learned a lot. We have good tools, we are blessed with all of the above - and we are still standing.</p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgVsoqomVoRqVsyeL5D-d2tXZwKCeK-O5nnkKWh4XXhvHcov7L2qiSTyJn7QCTFrp3VkRKoyMgfjenDWsQQWFtQPxKo9XkcPu1eMbUo8ACVXIXWSvjzrJ96ibetZv4LeIyTrOcQOtLwNamyj__LzO7gDoQ2hgaYYngTIok7UCthrwdPpPQTrqkiPcdV/s2048/IMG_4425.JPEG" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1536" data-original-width="2048" height="480" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgVsoqomVoRqVsyeL5D-d2tXZwKCeK-O5nnkKWh4XXhvHcov7L2qiSTyJn7QCTFrp3VkRKoyMgfjenDWsQQWFtQPxKo9XkcPu1eMbUo8ACVXIXWSvjzrJ96ibetZv4LeIyTrOcQOtLwNamyj__LzO7gDoQ2hgaYYngTIok7UCthrwdPpPQTrqkiPcdV/w640-h480/IMG_4425.JPEG" width="640" /></a></div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: left;">We get knocked down, tripped up, but we keep getting up. We encourage each other, we try to support each other, we listen to each other. And we are still here.</div><p style="text-align: left;"><b>Happy birthday to me. I'm 53 and I'm OK. </b></p><p style="text-align: left;"><br /></p>Simoneyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09554122579485306611noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4940553413759896971.post-24485571270122535052021-12-07T19:52:00.010+13:002021-12-07T20:39:05.041+13:00 When Christmas is Hard (Facing the Season after Loss)<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEhXRzwO0sh-Yecz6iwZZyNS3pxTljU1lueuYKE5O-rzovWPxYKTDIX8Rs-PILfzXxxS1OFyU4-htj6J1LpiyhCl-1DeP4OQVZaoN8xZFlbcZWpQnrORQctHOEkZc2V4RPNWs9hX09QUpNTgaBRKT1xXQachx9XivLJP5ChBEKQmuymFsWNcp6T3xxFK=s2048" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="Christmas Eve 2020" border="0" data-original-height="1536" data-original-width="2048" height="480" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEhXRzwO0sh-Yecz6iwZZyNS3pxTljU1lueuYKE5O-rzovWPxYKTDIX8Rs-PILfzXxxS1OFyU4-htj6J1LpiyhCl-1DeP4OQVZaoN8xZFlbcZWpQnrORQctHOEkZc2V4RPNWs9hX09QUpNTgaBRKT1xXQachx9XivLJP5ChBEKQmuymFsWNcp6T3xxFK=w640-h480" width="640" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><p>Christmas was always <a href="http://www.greatfun4kidsblog.com/p/christmas.html" target="_blank">my favourite time of the year</a> – until I found myself facing Christmas as a sole parent in 2016.</p><p class="MsoNormal"><o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">Five years on, I can look back from a new perspective where
the grief has healed and the loss no longer stings. We have settled in to our
new normal, and can reminisce about our awesome Christmases as a “whole family”
without an ache. <o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">But <a href="http://www.greatfun4kidsblog.com/2016/12/surviving-and-enjoying-christmas.html" target="_blank">I remember that first Christmas </a>and my heart goes out to
those of you who are facing your own first Christmas after a devastating loss.<o:p></o:p></p><span></span><span><a name='more'></a></span><p class="MsoNormal"><br /></p><span></span><p class="MsoNormal"></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEi5ksmhS24J4mcA1B2swkJN3azh5-QlYP1FKq4yIPiM_tUBR7p9yOjyn7kw_LQE03pfjrD6g5aystMaEGzAuxwN6vRRdantmQ7Ar2mTyHMqXTE8j_TxpELs1h0SQoTLIDli0_YaFqO6mwmDWhyrXYKMS0nhJWcZC0vTvX0XZAywkM-qFKD3XDmmuEvl=s2048" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="Christmas Eve 2020" border="0" data-original-height="1536" data-original-width="2048" height="480" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEi5ksmhS24J4mcA1B2swkJN3azh5-QlYP1FKq4yIPiM_tUBR7p9yOjyn7kw_LQE03pfjrD6g5aystMaEGzAuxwN6vRRdantmQ7Ar2mTyHMqXTE8j_TxpELs1h0SQoTLIDli0_YaFqO6mwmDWhyrXYKMS0nhJWcZC0vTvX0XZAywkM-qFKD3XDmmuEvl=w640-h480" title="Christmas Eve 2020" width="640" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div>Grief has a way of
making the memories of good-times-past unbearably painful. The days marking
anniversaries and celebrations are so much tougher than the regular days. The
contrast between “what used to be” and “what now is” is just so stark in the
days, months and years that follow loss. And Christmas is one of the toughest.<p></p><p class="MsoNormal"><o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">I remember how it felt, that first Christmas after I was separated.
If you are there right now, I want you to know that it truly won’t always feel
like this (even though it really feels like it always will).<o:p></o:p></p>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEjEFXCPP41VbAjGktS9wBM_l51VBqx46OZoWLPLczXbu2T5Ikfjd4XlWb7EeS01n5J_zggRH-WADHOY_EL3E76MUieGzkl6WbP-U1cAw6FffZWbz-JDwIggkqf4ix2DwWxjwPAe0eICtJom5q5ORKIEopCYBDDwb5xFhYK1gX-NVaqiLmzyyUrh4tYs=s1004" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="Christmas Family 2008" border="0" data-original-height="1004" data-original-width="929" height="640" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEjEFXCPP41VbAjGktS9wBM_l51VBqx46OZoWLPLczXbu2T5Ikfjd4XlWb7EeS01n5J_zggRH-WADHOY_EL3E76MUieGzkl6WbP-U1cAw6FffZWbz-JDwIggkqf4ix2DwWxjwPAe0eICtJom5q5ORKIEopCYBDDwb5xFhYK1gX-NVaqiLmzyyUrh4tYs=w592-h640" title="Christmas Family 2008" width="592" /></a></div><p class="MsoNormal">For our family, Christmas had always been a golden day - the
best day of the year with no fights, no growling, just food and fun and warm fuzzies. But with the end of the marriage and my lifelong dream of giving my children “a magical
childhood” dashed to pieces, I couldn’t shake a deep sense of failure and grief
- and Christmas only heightened those emotions. I kept comparing the fullness
of Christmases-gone-by with the empty hollowness I was feeling that first one
on our own.<o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">I didn’t know how on earth I would pull off Christmas for my
kids - my heart was just not in it. Where my heart should have been, there was
just a sick lump of dread, and at times it hurt to breathe. <o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"></p><div style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEiuJvubFqeLxhN7_RdjPG4UTOnEO4wtVuKEgLgaT_Vo2EJiu27MZBGOhWlZ1v1xptQPMMKBRzRFdoZb1wf46ePe3aIOInzroPNOB6fgFAbKmaTK9Wthz18dah18gpFw8qXBuDe6r7wefc34e2MBQD9EJxN7wv8dPIBmk2EUB1hs-sRH247tEoF4LxKW=s480"><img alt="Santa Photo with family 2009" border="0" data-original-height="480" data-original-width="360" height="640" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEiuJvubFqeLxhN7_RdjPG4UTOnEO4wtVuKEgLgaT_Vo2EJiu27MZBGOhWlZ1v1xptQPMMKBRzRFdoZb1wf46ePe3aIOInzroPNOB6fgFAbKmaTK9Wthz18dah18gpFw8qXBuDe6r7wefc34e2MBQD9EJxN7wv8dPIBmk2EUB1hs-sRH247tEoF4LxKW=w480-h640" title="Santa Photo with family 2009" width="480" /></a></div><br />But I had three kids counting on me to pull Christmas out of
a hat in spite of myself, so I started going through the motions, hoping that
some Christmas feeling would kick in at some point… <br />
Nothing worked. Not the piney scent of a real tree, not getting together with
friends and constructing gingerbread houses, not even watching favourite Christmas
movies.<o:p></o:p><p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">But in the end, I managed to survive that first bleak
Christmas and even – to my great surprise – enjoy it a bit. It wasn’t the
same, but it wasn’t terrible. There were some moments of love and joy that took
me by surprise and helped me get through. A couple of things helped....<o:p></o:p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEgxfCNp9s7hXshI_EXeMeoAO98JeVX_6Z_dSSiHzSJ9Im-bGkd94mxnq6WKwNZzM-K4XjaCLvIpL_7JKeTzWYz8RBfS77qXeMHbM9954CSLVdqDNXkhGMqW39bQkWKG974CSiOf-GjQHKMDuqXRCTsmwRJtcslZTg_8yTVrjIxiUv7cduxm4JKhf1yH=s4032" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="Christmas Tree decorating with Grandad 2020" border="0" data-original-height="3024" data-original-width="4032" height="480" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEgxfCNp9s7hXshI_EXeMeoAO98JeVX_6Z_dSSiHzSJ9Im-bGkd94mxnq6WKwNZzM-K4XjaCLvIpL_7JKeTzWYz8RBfS77qXeMHbM9954CSLVdqDNXkhGMqW39bQkWKG974CSiOf-GjQHKMDuqXRCTsmwRJtcslZTg_8yTVrjIxiUv7cduxm4JKhf1yH=w640-h480" title="Christmas Tree decorating with Grandad 2020" width="640" /></a></div>
<h2 style="margin-left: 21.3pt; text-align: left; text-indent: -18pt;"><span style="font-weight: normal;">1.<span style="font-size: 7pt; font-stretch: normal; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; line-height: normal;"> </span><!--[endif]-->Kind, thoughtful, generous people</span><o:p></o:p></h2>
<p class="MsoNormal">In Christmases past, our family had always made it a
tradition to give to others in need but now I found myself on the receiving end
of Christmas charity to help get us through the season. It was humbling and
overwhelming – but in a surprisingly good way. <o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">Words cannot describe what the thoughtfulness and generosity
of others meant to me that Christmas. The feeling that came with being thought
of, cared for and remembered? <i>Priceless.</i>
How can I convey the lift to my spirits when a lady from a support agency turned
up with a Christmas ham? The rush of gratitude when a church group came by with
gift boxes for each of us? The wave of feeling when a kind friend popped by
with a wrapped gift “for mum – because mum needs something to open on Christmas
too”? <o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">Acts of kindness big and small got me through that first
Christmas. <i>Never underestimate how
powerful your acts of kindness and generosity can be at this time of the year.
It means so much to be remembered.</i><b><o:p></o:p></b></p><p class="MsoNormal"></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEhEjijzLCje_t7qmCZ0WXNAR2cebPD0ZHoNvY8HomCyEpdozbeMPHLCbe4gT9sYpkpiM6ZzPUm12U7shhSdl6RVX_lgZK_CeMwXYUbRFYdNCTtO5p1_H-d5mDrLywZha0lFgC1HUvh_WzSsB4_NMRucl6-Ho5ev4ou4fSrveqAXLvIlhYCAB8ze08DC=s4032" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="Christmas Tree decorating 2020" border="0" data-original-height="3024" data-original-width="4032" height="480" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEhEjijzLCje_t7qmCZ0WXNAR2cebPD0ZHoNvY8HomCyEpdozbeMPHLCbe4gT9sYpkpiM6ZzPUm12U7shhSdl6RVX_lgZK_CeMwXYUbRFYdNCTtO5p1_H-d5mDrLywZha0lFgC1HUvh_WzSsB4_NMRucl6-Ho5ev4ou4fSrveqAXLvIlhYCAB8ze08DC=w640-h480" title="Christmas Tree decorating 2020" width="640" /></a></div><p></p>
<h2 style="margin-left: 1cm; text-align: left; text-indent: -1cm;"><span style="font-weight: normal;">2.<span style="font-size: 7pt; font-stretch: normal; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; line-height: normal;"> </span><span style="font-size: 7pt; font-stretch: normal; font-style: normal; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; line-height: normal;">
</span><!--[endif]-->Opening
the door to others</span></h2>
<p class="MsoNormal">In the midst of my struggle that first solo Christmas, one
of my kids asked if a friend could come and share our Christmas.
I said yes, and what do you know? Opening my door to someone who would have
otherwise been on their own for Christmas helped shift my perspective. It took
my focus off my sadness, and I discovered all over again that when you give out
to others so much more comes back to you. <i>Never
underestimate how powerful hospitality is. It really is true that it’s more
blessed to give than to receive.<b><o:p></o:p></b></i></p><p class="MsoNormal"></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEjb0nHQ9VdIUKEQwd_8B1zG6rV-QyYtSVMzrif0dYO3j4CtnfC9DfwPTIWfXGesynIWU3FukO6f_HaKXKLA76Hu0-4B1CbuE7JTem4lCM0tkKn1O-VtBHKXpCpRL8AXtj85NmXGWXqZXI_Cp-zZvcuXGsi_f7P9I38-8bU69Gon6k0HMD3ReZgYgy3h=s1471" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="Christmas Eve 2020" border="0" data-original-height="828" data-original-width="1471" height="360" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEjb0nHQ9VdIUKEQwd_8B1zG6rV-QyYtSVMzrif0dYO3j4CtnfC9DfwPTIWfXGesynIWU3FukO6f_HaKXKLA76Hu0-4B1CbuE7JTem4lCM0tkKn1O-VtBHKXpCpRL8AXtj85NmXGWXqZXI_Cp-zZvcuXGsi_f7P9I38-8bU69Gon6k0HMD3ReZgYgy3h=w640-h360" title="Christmas Eve 2020" width="640" /></a></div><i><br /></i><p></p>
<h2 style="margin-left: 21.3pt; text-align: left; text-indent: -18pt;"><span style="font-weight: normal;">3.<span style="font-size: 7pt; font-stretch: normal; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; line-height: normal;">
</span><!--[endif]-->Being
honest and asking for help</span></h2><p class="MsoListParagraph" style="margin-left: 21.3pt; mso-add-space: auto; mso-list: l0 level1 lfo2; text-indent: -18pt;"><o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">That first solo Christmas I couldn’t fool my older kids
about how much I was struggling. They saw through my efforts to white-knuckle
it through the season and sensed my lack of enthusiasm. I had no choice but to
come clean and ask them for help to make Christmas special – particularly for
the youngest, who was only 8 years old and thankfully oblivious to the struggle
I was having. <o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">That Christmas Eve I asked for my big kids’ help and they blew
me away with how they stepped up. My daughter set a Christmas Breakfast
table and added more decorations around the house so that when her little
brother woke up in the morning it would seem like the elves had been.<o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEiBekZmyHel80a2vrbCnAWxCtgApsZ8_fBd-Svm3WTvCk-Y7C87tLqDob43O1Or9-BUJIbfu8RIpo5GbsXRw5HEjrVXZYztharFwe96uh9_vfjajKxTRk8xq0XkNJyf6Us4IofjP89bK46p7yb0ale7HTM-EkCRNLpyc259C0OA8Wgzb9SfyylWCJZF=s2048" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="Christmas Eve hot chocolate 2020" border="0" data-original-height="1536" data-original-width="2048" height="480" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEiBekZmyHel80a2vrbCnAWxCtgApsZ8_fBd-Svm3WTvCk-Y7C87tLqDob43O1Or9-BUJIbfu8RIpo5GbsXRw5HEjrVXZYztharFwe96uh9_vfjajKxTRk8xq0XkNJyf6Us4IofjP89bK46p7yb0ale7HTM-EkCRNLpyc259C0OA8Wgzb9SfyylWCJZF=w640-h480" title="Christmas Eve hot chocolate 2020" width="640" /></a></div><br />My eldest volunteered to help bring out the wrapped gifts
and fill the stockings – a job usually done by both parents. It was incredibly special
working with my son to put the prezzies under the tree (something I had dreaded
as a lonely task) and he seemed to grow a couple of inches as he filled the
role of “man of the house”. <o:p></o:p><p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal">Watching my big kids help make magic happen for their little
brother filled my heart and made it sing. <i>Never
underestimate what you have built into your children over the years. Children
can surprise you with their awesomeness when you need it most.</i></p><p class="MsoNormal"></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEg7IVvanvAHmKQaDZpu_24aKwXzKNfS2RRQL3k0lahaVOooviDxFGnQFHBRX-GsHIG8DwHNld690XFDoLTcL8M5uSyynh7XKLyFcxl2y3CoejdnNsr_4oOQ2jkZKctOAv4VfrsWkhL2u9hcALYhee1FVkx---hQSZ0hyrc2ilr0A5lZKms4sxjeesEY=s2048" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="Christmas Morning 2020" border="0" data-original-height="1536" data-original-width="2048" height="480" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/a/AVvXsEg7IVvanvAHmKQaDZpu_24aKwXzKNfS2RRQL3k0lahaVOooviDxFGnQFHBRX-GsHIG8DwHNld690XFDoLTcL8M5uSyynh7XKLyFcxl2y3CoejdnNsr_4oOQ2jkZKctOAv4VfrsWkhL2u9hcALYhee1FVkx---hQSZ0hyrc2ilr0A5lZKms4sxjeesEY=w640-h480" title="Christmas Morning 2020" width="640" /></a></div><i><b><br /></b></i><p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"></p><h2 style="text-align: left;"><span style="font-weight: normal;">In Brief: Tips for
Christmas Survival after Loss</span></h2>If you’ve survived loss and grief this year and Christmas feels too hard,
it’s easy to want to hibernate and just wait for the silly season to pass by -
but that’s hard to do when you have kids counting on you, because very few kids
are willing to let Christmas slide. This requires us, the big people, to put on
a brave face for the sake of our kids. You can do this. You really can. Here
are a few things I learned to do that might help a little:<o:p></o:p><p></p>
<p class="MsoListParagraphCxSpFirst" style="mso-list: l1 level1 lfo1; text-indent: -18pt;"><!--[if !supportLists]--><span style="font-family: Symbol; mso-bidi-font-family: Symbol; mso-fareast-font-family: Symbol;">·<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman"; font-size: 7pt; font-stretch: normal; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; line-height: normal;">
</span></span><!--[endif]--><b>Be kind
to yourself</b> - recognise that this is a really hard time of the year and be
kind to yourself as much as you can. It’s understandable that you’re not
feeling the Christmas spirit when you’re walking through the world with a hole
ripped in your chest.<o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle" style="mso-list: l1 level1 lfo1; text-indent: -18pt;"><!--[if !supportLists]--><span style="font-family: Symbol; mso-bidi-font-family: Symbol; mso-fareast-font-family: Symbol;">·<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman"; font-size: 7pt; font-stretch: normal; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; line-height: normal;">
</span></span><!--[endif]--><b>Adjust
your expectations</b> – don’t put pressure on yourself to deliver the Best
Christmas Ever. Be realistic - for a couple of years you might need to do <i>Christmas</i> <i>Lite</i>. It might suck a little bit compared to Christmases gone by,
but there will be some beautiful moments that will get you through.<o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle" style="mso-list: l1 level1 lfo1; text-indent: -18pt;"><!--[if !supportLists]--><span style="font-family: Symbol; mso-bidi-font-family: Symbol; mso-fareast-font-family: Symbol;">·<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman"; font-size: 7pt; font-stretch: normal; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; line-height: normal;">
</span></span><!--[endif]--><b>Adjust
your kids’ expectations</b> – kids are smart and resilient, they can handle a
bit of honesty. If they are school age (or even very mature kindy-age) make
some hot chocolate, sit down together and have a Christmas powwow. Acknowledge
that Christmas will be different this year and brainstorm together how you can
still make it special. <o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle" style="mso-list: l1 level1 lfo1; text-indent: -18pt;"><!--[if !supportLists]--><span style="font-family: Symbol; mso-bidi-font-family: Symbol; mso-fareast-font-family: Symbol;">·<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman"; font-size: 7pt; font-stretch: normal; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; line-height: normal;">
</span></span><!--[endif]--><b>Redesign
your Christmas season</b> – ask your kids what traditions/activities make it
feel like Christmas for them (what can they not do without?) and just do those
things. Drop everything else from the menu.<b>
</b>Ditch activities/traditions that trigger too many comparisons or raw
memories. Some traditions might be just too painful to continue after loss, so
see if you can replace them with alternatives that aren’t triggering. Get your
kids involved in this – kids often have great ideas.<o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle" style="mso-list: l1 level1 lfo1; text-indent: -18pt;"><!--[if !supportLists]--><span style="font-family: Symbol; mso-bidi-font-family: Symbol; mso-fareast-font-family: Symbol;">·<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman"; font-size: 7pt; font-stretch: normal; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; line-height: normal;">
</span></span><!--[endif]--><b>Stay
Connected</b> – it can be tempting to hide away and cut yourself off from friends
and family, but what you actually need is good company. Push yourself to
connect with safe friends at this time of the year; let people in. <o:p></o:p></p>
<p class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle" style="mso-list: l1 level1 lfo1; text-indent: -18pt;"><!--[if !supportLists]--><span style="font-family: Symbol; mso-bidi-font-family: Symbol; mso-fareast-font-family: Symbol;">·<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman"; font-size: 7pt; font-stretch: normal; font-variant-east-asian: normal; font-variant-numeric: normal; line-height: normal;">
</span></span><!--[endif]--><b>Accept
help </b>– don’t be too proud to accept help when it is offered. It may be
difficult (and humbling) to accept help but remember that “it is more blessed
to give than receive” so let those offering help be blessed by allowing
them to give to you. The time will come when you’re back on your feet again and
you can pay it forward.</p><p class="MsoListParagraphCxSpLast"><o:p><span style="font-family: inherit;">P.S. I told my daughter I was writing this post, and she said, "Do it, Mum. Tell them it gets better." </span> </o:p></p>
<p class="MsoNormal"><o:p> ----------------</o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal"><o:p><span style="font-family: courier;">IMAGES: These photos are from Christmas 2020, which my youngest called the Best Christmas Ever. Pictures include: Tree Decorating with Nan and Grandad and Santa-Clyde, Christmas Eve watching The Polar Express and drinking hot chocolate, Christmas morning prezzy pile and a few throwbacks to the younger years for contrast. We all still love Christmas (it doesn't hurt anymore). </span></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal"><br /></p>Simoneyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09554122579485306611noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4940553413759896971.post-76301479780544547962021-10-22T23:24:00.020+13:002021-10-23T00:41:49.275+13:00On Edge<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiMf7rwMS0sEkpEx2uU0axHo6SCg1D0v0nmEwMA0mGQEk8JikSqi0I2Kq7LoJxOOrVW8FIcR3X5D1YtGfvpNjAnyG0nTXUiwNk5LF8eQngims5VVMUUHmfdCi2ldp8XigOSQFDKOqgMf2E/s400/burning-candle-reflected-window-late-260nw-1703002297_edited.jpg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="Share the Light" border="0" data-original-height="258" data-original-width="400" height="412" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiMf7rwMS0sEkpEx2uU0axHo6SCg1D0v0nmEwMA0mGQEk8JikSqi0I2Kq7LoJxOOrVW8FIcR3X5D1YtGfvpNjAnyG0nTXUiwNk5LF8eQngims5VVMUUHmfdCi2ldp8XigOSQFDKOqgMf2E/w640-h412/burning-candle-reflected-window-late-260nw-1703002297_edited.jpg" title="Share the Light" width="640" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><p>I am on edge and I need to vent the best way I know how.</p><p>I need to somehow clarify and articulate what it is that has me pent up like a pipe about to burst. In my body I feel the tension, every nerve screams.</p><p>It's this lockdown. This endless, mind-numbing, soul-sapping lockdown.</p><span><a name='more'></a></span><p>It's the not-knowing. </p><p>Not knowing when - or if - it will end. There are targets, sure, but who knows when we will reach them. We don't know. Nobody can tell us, really.</p><p>It's the sapping sludge of time, as we trudge through each endlessly-repeating turn of the earth.</p><p>It's the knowledge that here in Auckland, our fate is in the hands of others, who may or may not take the magic bullet that will release us from this endless exile.</p><p>And it's the aggro that I feel swirling in the atmosphere between the vaccine advocates and the vax-averse.</p><p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhlnvk9U_S12xK9eqM0_vmc6B84COt637m04hf4Vva9fEWk8CqnL3pb8k0expsVcksC5uve5TilJbu34pJOEbUFqW4SBaOQexg6kVibZifY4aoHwxW7rdYdUkJie1hUwecqNC2SzNuPHV8/s1458/IMG_3746_edited.jpg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="Thank goodness for puppies, really" border="0" data-original-height="1042" data-original-width="1458" height="458" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhlnvk9U_S12xK9eqM0_vmc6B84COt637m04hf4Vva9fEWk8CqnL3pb8k0expsVcksC5uve5TilJbu34pJOEbUFqW4SBaOQexg6kVibZifY4aoHwxW7rdYdUkJie1hUwecqNC2SzNuPHV8/w640-h458/IMG_3746_edited.jpg" title="Thank goodness for puppies, really" width="640" /></a></div><br />Sometimes I find it hard to breathe with the weight of worry pressing on my chest as friends and family face the choice: to jab or not to jab. For me it was simple, I had nothing to lose. But the choice is not as clear for some. I feel the weight of that. <p></p><p>My heart is heavy for those caught on a knife edge, whose livelihoods are on the line but who are wrestling with valid concerns. My heart is heavy for all of us, and the division that is here among us in our beautiful country. Fingers pointing and blaming, vilifying and attacking, one side against another. </p><p>May we all try to walk a mile in another's shoes before we judge. May we listen to each other and try to understand.</p><p>The collective goodwill seems to have seeped away. Our communities are suspicious of each other, our community pages report spates of mail-theft and car-breaking, comment sections are more toxic than ever.</p><p>Long gone are those early days of "Kia Kaha New Zealand"; the Team of Five Million has become some kind of a bad joke. </p><p>I can't watch. It feels like things will never return to "normal" here in Auckland/New Zealand.</p><p><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhICJmxjFRRV0vNuJHfU3ckG_nVL5NgYNN71f3l8kXPtTsvojkJwkZIPJbbCE37PFc9nR0-O1SGTILKxEa_0QL8Q5Xxe0kx1LSzJj5Peu3WOMRFgq_x9CZQ7Zdy0ClHOUo79HjeuwcHdGY/s2048/IMG_3736_edited.jpg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em; text-align: center;"><img alt="My teenage bubble buddies in the four walls of my bedroom" border="0" data-original-height="1536" data-original-width="2048" height="480" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhICJmxjFRRV0vNuJHfU3ckG_nVL5NgYNN71f3l8kXPtTsvojkJwkZIPJbbCE37PFc9nR0-O1SGTILKxEa_0QL8Q5Xxe0kx1LSzJj5Peu3WOMRFgq_x9CZQ7Zdy0ClHOUo79HjeuwcHdGY/w640-h480/IMG_3736_edited.jpg" title="My teenage bubble buddies in the four walls of my bedroom" width="640" /></a></p><p>A simple trip to the hardware store to pick up the hammer and nails I need to repair my broken gate has become an hour-long wait in the click-and-collect queue behind a hundred other cars at New Lynn Mitre 10.</p><p>Online orders warn of shipping delays. All my pajamas have worn through (who bothers getting dressed?) but it will take three weeks to get hold of a new pair. (I placed an order anyway - what choice do I have?)</p><p>As I type this I remind myself that it's just a bad day today, that lockdown has gotten to me but really, I'm one of the lucky ones.</p><p>At least I have a home and a job and a car. I have friends and family and workmates out there, even if I can't hug them for a while yet. </p><p>I miss my fellow-humans. </p><div><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEilgN0er4NG6Fwl-8hFmrnzmzNxbm-CroGCY79MvDFKYGbbA6DixQbio3MqwYtkECizY41hv2c2w162vwQJlM0xVjfESVEFqrH7SboTgxFeQ7AZT1YG8vNLf2WYo565aodeQWxKaK0XRGI/s2048/IMG_3768.jpeg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="Lockdown cheer training at Milford Beach reserve" border="0" data-original-height="1536" data-original-width="2048" height="480" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEilgN0er4NG6Fwl-8hFmrnzmzNxbm-CroGCY79MvDFKYGbbA6DixQbio3MqwYtkECizY41hv2c2w162vwQJlM0xVjfESVEFqrH7SboTgxFeQ7AZT1YG8vNLf2WYo565aodeQWxKaK0XRGI/w640-h480/IMG_3768.jpeg" title="Lockdown cheer training at Milford Beach reserve" width="640" /></a></div><p>Sunny days are good days. Last Saturday with the slightly relaxed Level 3 restrictions, it actually felt like a weekend. My bestie Mel and her daughter joined me and mine for a "<a href="http://www.greatfun4kidsblog.com/2015/07/nights-of-fire-and-marshmallows.html" target="_blank">fire night</a>" - my first non-supermarket-line human contact in months (aside from my kids). I made <a href="http://www.greatfun4kidsblog.com/2009/01/sangria-for-young-and-old.html" target="_blank">sangria</a>, we toasted marshmallows and made smores. It felt normal. Socially distanced, masks, outdoors, normal.</p><p>Today was not sunny. It's been blustery and grey, the weather reflecting my mood. I feel wound up and tense and on the edge. But when the sun comes out again I will gain a burst of renewed energy and things won't feel so grim.</p><p>In the meantime I will focus on some things I am thankful for, like French Toast with nutmeg, maple syrup and cream...</p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhnm5LrbcpF-CWAxVTrf4V8zcLnG_TAlxyK57BwzDt_uG9t-LxcjoyY5Xxe3iTwTH47KUucxOpywdwpPeLACDkBCUM9Gs_jNDZlAymhHwCRFXtmyseeIeU0aBE_aMbkZTItjob6g8ElQXE/s2048/IMG_3764.jpeg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="French Toast has become a favourite lockdown treat" border="0" data-original-height="1536" data-original-width="2048" height="480" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhnm5LrbcpF-CWAxVTrf4V8zcLnG_TAlxyK57BwzDt_uG9t-LxcjoyY5Xxe3iTwTH47KUucxOpywdwpPeLACDkBCUM9Gs_jNDZlAymhHwCRFXtmyseeIeU0aBE_aMbkZTItjob6g8ElQXE/w640-h480/IMG_3764.jpeg" title="French Toast has become a favourite lockdown treat" width="640" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhSzsh7lSc_Kr5yljmjiLFYK8cpXkccCVctMaakoQ1uAo4mkzdKeT3XxuHROcqLkdgxjuyRWcIEqL2G-P213bUUYPdrudaMxI-10-KDMcT2PcDE3maZUoctFWcs-FbJ8_hGBkCvOr6KHOU/s2048/IMG_3765.jpeg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="These two watch every bite, hoping for a crumb or a lick" border="0" data-original-height="1536" data-original-width="2048" height="480" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhSzsh7lSc_Kr5yljmjiLFYK8cpXkccCVctMaakoQ1uAo4mkzdKeT3XxuHROcqLkdgxjuyRWcIEqL2G-P213bUUYPdrudaMxI-10-KDMcT2PcDE3maZUoctFWcs-FbJ8_hGBkCvOr6KHOU/w640-h480/IMG_3765.jpeg" title="These two watch every bite, hoping for a crumb or a lick" width="640" /></a></div><p>... and silly doggies who watch you put every bite in your mouth hoping you'll share (or at least let them lick the plate).</p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhwyCy4OQLYZ2Lnba8zpbAKYZiHtT_cR3ugWnpZBFdyZp40nLC47a8a2HxP3umD1V0KiVdwF3ypQpmqZAGcYp1TQTv4bm9I6n0jxRSZ4pEYk9vDvxNm5_rV2K2wOoa0WrFiRPY7dOG7XM8/s828/Desk+Buddy+gift.jpg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="Thank you Soul Sister Desk Buddy!" border="0" data-original-height="621" data-original-width="828" height="480" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhwyCy4OQLYZ2Lnba8zpbAKYZiHtT_cR3ugWnpZBFdyZp40nLC47a8a2HxP3umD1V0KiVdwF3ypQpmqZAGcYp1TQTv4bm9I6n0jxRSZ4pEYk9vDvxNm5_rV2K2wOoa0WrFiRPY7dOG7XM8/w640-h480/Desk+Buddy+gift.jpg" title="Thank you Soul Sister Desk Buddy!" width="640" /></a></div><p>I am especially thankful for the blessing of friends, workmates and a lovely desk buddy who asked for my address and sent me a "Soul Sister"" candle <i>just because. </i>Bless you, Alex P!</p><p>One day, we will be desk buddies again and I will get out of my holey pajamas. (LOL)</p><p>Today was just a tense, edgy lockdown angsty day. It's totally normal given the situation and I know I am not the only one feeling it. It will pass, eventually, surely, sometime.</p><p><span style="font-family: courier;">I wrote this to get the yucky blahs out and I feel better now. Wherever you are I hope you're doing OK. Much love to you all xx</span></p>Simoneyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09554122579485306611noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4940553413759896971.post-17513486985714873372021-09-04T18:13:00.018+12:002021-09-04T19:15:54.042+12:00'The dog ate my homework' and other true stories<p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEheIdc-MbeACh_PoAzgJKP3Dps6petmyVCgXrM9O9ZERjt6Wxr41VXuGVRGHdjXn34X6ICpaTvf4mSLEZzZp9VZ_1DWaWyPkpT9TLdx4wH4LnZsNpfcT1A2DnhwhlL37U-mpWNrSxDuU3I/s1536/IMG_3545+%25281%2529.jpeg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1140" data-original-width="1536" height="476" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEheIdc-MbeACh_PoAzgJKP3Dps6petmyVCgXrM9O9ZERjt6Wxr41VXuGVRGHdjXn34X6ICpaTvf4mSLEZzZp9VZ_1DWaWyPkpT9TLdx4wH4LnZsNpfcT1A2DnhwhlL37U-mpWNrSxDuU3I/w640-h476/IMG_3545+%25281%2529.jpeg" width="640" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div>We have been dog owners for five years now, and we cannot imagine life without our doggy boy, Clyde.<p></p><p>Back in 2016, while in the middle of a messy marriage breakup, I <a href="http://www.greatfun4kidsblog.com/2016/11/what-kids-learn-from-having-dog.html" target="_blank">decided to get us a puppy</a>. It was counterintuitive, and many people questioned my sanity - surely I had enough on my plate? Why add the stress of a baby dog to my to-do list?</p><p>But it was one of the best decisions I ever made. <a href="http://www.greatfun4kidsblog.com/2016/07/hello-its-me-and-clyde-puppy.html" target="_blank">I went with my gut</a>, and we never looked back.</p><p>Animals have such a therapeutic effect on people who are struggling with overwhelm or anxiety - there is nothing like doggy kisses and snuggles to lift a drooping spirit. Dogs are fantastic medicine for the soul.</p><p>So if one dog is good, surely two dogs are even better?</p><span><a name='more'></a></span><p><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj3YOO0nEcTp8zczl90eXPXqaYhF-aQNFVJuR-7NC29ENuLpSOFJDO9tHs3C9J5Y1NbadHLvfXPHIX6McoWY4uTjUFLmMHd66urrNINvDFtCiyFAYvrMjPzYwf7QbPmtRIp4ehbAhWowH0/s2048/IMG_3684.jpeg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em; text-align: center;"><img alt="Best Buds" border="0" data-original-height="1536" data-original-width="2048" height="480" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj3YOO0nEcTp8zczl90eXPXqaYhF-aQNFVJuR-7NC29ENuLpSOFJDO9tHs3C9J5Y1NbadHLvfXPHIX6McoWY4uTjUFLmMHd66urrNINvDFtCiyFAYvrMjPzYwf7QbPmtRIp4ehbAhWowH0/w640-h480/IMG_3684.jpeg" title="Best Buds" width="640" /></a></p><p>A couple of months back, when a member of our household was struggling with horrible depression, I got that gut feeling again: <i>let's get another puppy. </i></p><p>I know the anchoring effect my children have had for me in my darkest moments and I had a sense that a new puppy would be like an anchor for this person. Something to care for, a creature depending on you to stick around. </p><p>So we hit the DC Rescue Dogs page = the same place we found Clyde = and came across the cutest little girl. She looks like a black lab puppy, but her parents are a curious mix of Rottweiler (dad) and Daschund/Terrier cross (mum). Can you even imagine that picture?</p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgr5famdhIAZvKOQIAu2cCPOPyKO_QmIAgB4VKBbUIV95TFbulLX9hqZrfUCzlYYxS3ZJAQx3SFfaItbXVKRG7hXTZgE3MWGr9ucQrG4MEkXfNnAsRj1oJFdKb3dtgNrI2JFR1DdslmDJg/s597/IMG_3416.JPG" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="Indie does not look like a weird mix of breeds" border="0" data-original-height="585" data-original-width="597" height="314" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgr5famdhIAZvKOQIAu2cCPOPyKO_QmIAgB4VKBbUIV95TFbulLX9hqZrfUCzlYYxS3ZJAQx3SFfaItbXVKRG7hXTZgE3MWGr9ucQrG4MEkXfNnAsRj1oJFdKb3dtgNrI2JFR1DdslmDJg/w320-h314/IMG_3416.JPG" title="Indie does not look like a weird mix of breeds" width="320" /></a></div><p>The result of that liaison could have resulted in a real mishmash, but somehow those odd ingredients combined to make the prettiest puppy we've ever seen.</p><p>With some trepidation we drove to Hamilton with Clyde, to introduce him to his potential new sister. If they didn't hit it off, we wouldn't be allowed to take her home, so we really hoped Clyde would be a good boy. Our hearts were in our mouths just a bit because Clyde sometimes takes against other dogs for no apparent reason (remember <a href="http://www.greatfun4kidsblog.com/2017/03/dog-zoo-or-what-was-i-thinking.html" target="_blank">Buddy?</a>). We were crossing our fingers that this girl puppy would find favour.</p><p>But <i>phew,</i> Clyde was a good lad, the puppy's foster mum gave us the thumbs up, and all of a sudden we were a two-dog family.</p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgZU-vV6l500yp_2OYaMsr492amTgCLEHRLBM_6R6HIUVN1QBbkILaoKwMrX4VGziJpHyVJjqqhjxmT-CRBt5UHhDNrjJfAUo8bhhL5Mci-B9GqsgBoFa0Z30AfS1duQlaQ5taBPmJQXys/s3088/IMG_3427.jpeg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="Bringing Indie home - the world's happiest puppy" border="0" data-original-height="2316" data-original-width="3088" height="480" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgZU-vV6l500yp_2OYaMsr492amTgCLEHRLBM_6R6HIUVN1QBbkILaoKwMrX4VGziJpHyVJjqqhjxmT-CRBt5UHhDNrjJfAUo8bhhL5Mci-B9GqsgBoFa0Z30AfS1duQlaQ5taBPmJQXys/w640-h480/IMG_3427.jpeg" title="Bringing Indie home - the world's happiest puppy" width="640" /></a></div><p>Her name is Indie and she is the happiest puppy in the world. Every morning she bounces awake and does the rounds of the family, kissing everyone and wagging her tail. That tail never stops wagging.</p><p>She took a while to get the hang of toileting - she's a bit of a princess and didn't like squatting on the cold ground. Thankfully she is Clyde's biggest fangirl and has to do everything he does - eventually that extended to using the backyard for her business instead of leaving surprises dotted around the house.</p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEibXagca3H9kI6ZJJssdK51CuZo0h6uZ1KnCwgNs87hO3NO7nYU9YruI-jSTRrjbmJ0daFTCoVm2q8pBEhvZZ2RUDOt3GOp7TvMvnlYy7egbGsX9_d37I-jweKmJIvnpmVlcDuzGP8V-YI/s828/IMG_3523.jpeg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="Canine Security Squad" border="0" data-original-height="727" data-original-width="828" height="562" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEibXagca3H9kI6ZJJssdK51CuZo0h6uZ1KnCwgNs87hO3NO7nYU9YruI-jSTRrjbmJ0daFTCoVm2q8pBEhvZZ2RUDOt3GOp7TvMvnlYy7egbGsX9_d37I-jweKmJIvnpmVlcDuzGP8V-YI/w640-h562/IMG_3523.jpeg" title="Canine Security Squad" width="640" /></a></div><p>Clyde has not only taught her toiletiquette, but also how to Guard Dog. Together they take up their surveillance positions - on my bed or on the couch, monitoring the front windows. Anyone walking past gets a low-throated growl followed by a frenzy of barking from two doggies now. Couriers think twice about approaching the house, which means we are pretty safe from burglars thanks to our canine security detail.</p><p>Indie is a high-energy, super-happy pup who weirdly loves to chew sticks, rocks and paper.</p><p>I never understood the reason for the "my dog ate my homework" excuse until I met Indie - she's a menace with paper. Toilet paper is her favourite. Many's the morning we have awoken to trails of white stuff strewn around the lounge. But if she can't get hold of toilet paper, any paper will do. I came home from work one day to find that she had selected one of my spiral-bound journals for a snack. Argh!</p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiz2YjkomFUv4VACa2DWeolgbJdRkTjX77bEB7UmBPdDD78EcZlqjY7VwMVSkTsuVl_BTZ7LvmdlR5drRwuI_FEwXevcUR_w95VaOC7882xqO35_g06PgIw7C_RpYd7GtWdqnizbENjiYw/s823/puppies.jpeg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="The cushions in this picture did not survive" border="0" data-original-height="667" data-original-width="823" height="518" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiz2YjkomFUv4VACa2DWeolgbJdRkTjX77bEB7UmBPdDD78EcZlqjY7VwMVSkTsuVl_BTZ7LvmdlR5drRwuI_FEwXevcUR_w95VaOC7882xqO35_g06PgIw7C_RpYd7GtWdqnizbENjiYw/w640-h518/puppies.jpeg" title="The cushions in this picture did not survive" width="640" /></a></div><br /><p>She also has a thing for cushions. <i>Sigh. </i>So many cushions have met their end on the mornings Indie wakes up early and there's nobody to play with. Along with charger cables and spectacles. She really is a menace when it comes to chewing stuff.</p><p>But apart from the chewing, Indie is a total blessing.</p><p>She is super obedient, has great recall and loves to play fetch (unlike certain older dogs we could name). She also has the silkiest softest fur.</p><p>Her joy at life is contagious. She has completely filled the role of 'emotional support animal'</p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj1Hr4SjqVgfR_pcWxvz6qz80WCU3p3XMcvvWfOZRX2SAe-E1QkZZIc1lTFDy99Amt-LWWG8Yz5-uVjCI18jh8LT103X-MrbBz9GDu6IOmbsbvBRbUAe37VSmhY5ipXYE1V6P2NG3vu3hM/s2048/Collage+Indie.png" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1365" data-original-width="2048" height="426" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj1Hr4SjqVgfR_pcWxvz6qz80WCU3p3XMcvvWfOZRX2SAe-E1QkZZIc1lTFDy99Amt-LWWG8Yz5-uVjCI18jh8LT103X-MrbBz9GDu6IOmbsbvBRbUAe37VSmhY5ipXYE1V6P2NG3vu3hM/w640-h426/Collage+Indie.png" width="640" /></a></div><p>I don't know how we would be surviving this lockdown without our happy little Indie.</p><p>Indie lights up the place with her endlessly waving flag of a tail, her enthusiastic kisses, and general awesomeness. She greets every return from the store as if she'd been parted from us for months. Dogs give so much love, and Indie gives even more than most.</p><p>Having one dog was good but having two dogs? It's the best.</p>Simoneyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09554122579485306611noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4940553413759896971.post-91223051223030041792021-08-23T22:32:00.055+12:002021-08-24T01:08:15.124+12:00It turns out - I'm not over...<p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhEHRh_U5o8M1vglCqYRdy_Dys1XVDDaJ6yZ26Fum7Nr40IcO4xxuaFEc2auMSYitVy6XN4oNFuQbBAzWQSYQaR7JeAJTcmJn6uaD3qlQy39DUjUXurc1GexwwjsAFYcCo65Bajd-ipsdk/s1907/not+over+1.jpeg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1388" data-original-width="1907" height="466" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhEHRh_U5o8M1vglCqYRdy_Dys1XVDDaJ6yZ26Fum7Nr40IcO4xxuaFEc2auMSYitVy6XN4oNFuQbBAzWQSYQaR7JeAJTcmJn6uaD3qlQy39DUjUXurc1GexwwjsAFYcCo65Bajd-ipsdk/w640-h466/not+over+1.jpeg" width="640" /></a></div><br />Today has been a super-emotional day. <p></p><p>Maybe it's partly the Level Four lockdown we find ourselves back in, all of a sudden. Maybe it's the weird limbo of waiting for my Covid test results to come back. Maybe it's being stuck at home with three teenagers and two dogs, unable to leave the house until we get those test results. Maybe it's years of walking with my kids as they face down their giants, and the way lockdown threatens to derail all the hard-won progress, wrought through literal blood, sweat and tears. </p><p>Probably it's a mix of everything, but this morning, all of a sudden I just <i>couldn't</i>.</p><p>This post is not about that. But that's the background to this feeling I have right now, this incredible gratitude, a fragile tenderness where tears are just below the surface.</p><p>Gratitude because - it turns out - <i>I'm not over</i>.</p><span><a name='more'></a></span><p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjP0Is07Ng7tLp-5l01bLYwdkxZXHfFKdJXK6Rtvhy-mkOWrMc_C6UwdXbqYGx4Hb1dNgnPKhuJ8zi5yXv_pHAK6-1owhH_aqb6MjR_We279kLQOMjx7jCzakHvfmBJZQtliYN69xiciMc/s2048/IMG_2244.jpeg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1536" data-original-width="2048" height="480" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjP0Is07Ng7tLp-5l01bLYwdkxZXHfFKdJXK6Rtvhy-mkOWrMc_C6UwdXbqYGx4Hb1dNgnPKhuJ8zi5yXv_pHAK6-1owhH_aqb6MjR_We279kLQOMjx7jCzakHvfmBJZQtliYN69xiciMc/w640-h480/IMG_2244.jpeg" width="640" /></a></div><br />I used to always have a strong sense of purpose. My faith in God and the feeling that there was a Plan gave me that purpose. But <a href="http://www.greatfun4kidsblog.com/2019/04/from-ashes.html" target="_blank">after my marriage ended </a>five years ago, I believed that I had somehow become fatally derailed. I was done. Over. Finished with.<p></p><p>My life was off in a ditch with the shards of my smashed dreams and my hurting kids. </p><p>Having lost so much, along with my sense of purpose, I just planned to see my kids through to adulthood in some semblance of okay-ness (i.e. <i>hopefully no sociopaths</i>) and then quietly retreat from the world to finish out my days as an observer, not a participator.</p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgLKqg6S8NeeUdXHGVPQ4wUjdNI8ebeMbx4tTwsN7zVasuDphA4WIy3HN2riDYRzcFRTGyJ11U4YoyDZNViBROICzp38F7g6Ec8ay4jsqLXzTzsO1_IUC5kFLe0P7l9kNb3mKPrbxPqTSg/s2048/family+car.jpeg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="The crew" border="0" data-original-height="1536" data-original-width="2048" height="480" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgLKqg6S8NeeUdXHGVPQ4wUjdNI8ebeMbx4tTwsN7zVasuDphA4WIy3HN2riDYRzcFRTGyJ11U4YoyDZNViBROICzp38F7g6Ec8ay4jsqLXzTzsO1_IUC5kFLe0P7l9kNb3mKPrbxPqTSg/w640-h480/family+car.jpeg" title="The crew" width="640" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><p>I've <a href="http://www.greatfun4kidsblog.com/2019/04/from-ashes.html" target="_blank">written about this</a> a little before - the crisis my faith underwent when my marriage imploded. I still believed God was real (I'd seen/experienced too much to doubt that), but I figured he was done with me now that my life was such a mess. Not exactly a poster child for victorious Christian living, amiright?</p><p>Back in the days when I was young and idealistic and really thought I could change the world, my heart was broken for broken people. I <a href="http://www.greatfun4kidsblog.com/2010/05/my-side-of-story.html" target="_blank">did everything I could to try and help </a>young people who everyone else had given up on. The 'at-risk' ones from broken families, with all those issues that put them in the <i>too hard</i> basket. Now my own kids ticked so many of those 'at risk' boxes.</p><p><i>How did that happen???</i></p><p dir="rtl" style="text-align: left;">.I must have gone wrong somewhere, I was sure</p><p>I was also sure that if God had 'used me' to do his work when I was young, he had no further use for me now. I was a terrible Christian, with a bruised and smoldering faith that couldn't spark a light even in my own very small corner.</p><p>Like I said, I was over.</p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhSKdI9b8hZ6YuKIuvzHzA1939IHQYorpi_5iFI0fR73R0KddJXVhKWlwFF14FRoPgnFMj_1VGeyylj6N00b2X8BZUdtLpdaTfk_xnqeatH_zMYgT3xLGA0w5TQUii7mHFMTqzUt4tsKRI/s1937/jono+clyde+and+josh.jpeg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1422" data-original-width="1937" height="470" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhSKdI9b8hZ6YuKIuvzHzA1939IHQYorpi_5iFI0fR73R0KddJXVhKWlwFF14FRoPgnFMj_1VGeyylj6N00b2X8BZUdtLpdaTfk_xnqeatH_zMYgT3xLGA0w5TQUii7mHFMTqzUt4tsKRI/w640-h470/jono+clyde+and+josh.jpeg" width="640" /></a></div><p>But then.</p><p>Needing to change my employment situation, back in May, I found myself scrolling the <i>Seek </i>app looking for a new job while killing time during cheer training. There was a job listing for a Grants Manager at a 'faith-based organisation' which caught my eye. I didn't think I had enough qualifications for it, but hey - at least I had 5 years' experience writing grant applications for a bunch of charities. </p><p>I updated my cover letter, attached my CV and pressed 'send'.</p><p>The next day I received a call from the organisation - they had received my application and <i>were really excited to meet me</i>. When could I come in?</p><p>With the job interview booked, I figured I'd better look on their website and find out what kind of organisation I was going to be interviewing with. <a href="https://tewhakaora.org.nz/" target="_blank">Te Whakaora Tangata</a>... what did they actually do??? </p><p>My heart started to beat faster as I read about the way they work with "families other agencies have given up on..." </p><p>The clincher was when I saw that my old boss from Parenting Place was their founding Board member.</p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhdqDFNleQ4yps_-3784loaRteaLHjjVlAemVVp-Gw05axCD2x8PHHeWoi8o6iPyrSrbMQOI9bZ9REzCHhiqxOFbroLYgT4lNr8hj1b2CDc4GDT8aEbh2c7Axvu-TXH8b1Q7k-Th2R6iqk/s2048/Inkedfamily+photo_LI.jpg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="All the kids are taller than me now" border="0" data-original-height="1536" data-original-width="2048" height="480" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhdqDFNleQ4yps_-3784loaRteaLHjjVlAemVVp-Gw05axCD2x8PHHeWoi8o6iPyrSrbMQOI9bZ9REzCHhiqxOFbroLYgT4lNr8hj1b2CDc4GDT8aEbh2c7Axvu-TXH8b1Q7k-Th2R6iqk/w640-h480/Inkedfamily+photo_LI.jpg" title="All the kids are taller than me now" width="640" /></a></div><br /><p>Parenting Place had been my dream place to work. It became my community, my support in those early awful years of sole parenting. I thought I'd never get to work anywhere that awesome ever again - an organisation that really cared about its employees and invested in our personal development. Where <a href="http://www.greatfun4kidsblog.com/2018/08/kei-te-haere-tonu-ahau.html" target="_blank">I'd had the privilege of beginning a 'haerenga' (journey)</a> into <i>te ao Māori</i><span face="arial, sans-serif" style="background-color: white; color: #202124; font-size: 16px;"> </span> (the Māori<span face="arial, sans-serif" style="background-color: white; color: #202124; font-size: 16px;"> </span>world) and learning <i>te Reo</i> (the language).</p><p>Restructuring had meant that I couldn't keep working there and I had been gutted to have to leave.</p><p>But now, here was <a href="https://tewhakaora.org.nz/" target="_blank">this organisation</a>, working with the kind of families whose kids I was once so passionate to help, with a focus on Maori, restoring the physical, mental and spiritual wellbeing of broken families - and Greg is on the Board.</p><p>A shiver ran down my spine as I saw the threads coming together.</p><p><i>Maybe I'm not over.</i></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh8BNlFG1-tJl-d15p-o9eW7x7lWRbLrc_v3lJfPbtgbidogSU54wMQzxSx8ViK6yrfTP9H4wNj-mgqE_jHiTX2JOg7dr770zDK3rkfuZ41J4iKExzb8cXXhf7c1zA4v_Mzbz6dAWFbYxU/s2048/IMG_3623.jpeg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="Te Whakaora Tangata - "Life Restoration for the People"" border="0" data-original-height="1536" data-original-width="2048" height="480" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh8BNlFG1-tJl-d15p-o9eW7x7lWRbLrc_v3lJfPbtgbidogSU54wMQzxSx8ViK6yrfTP9H4wNj-mgqE_jHiTX2JOg7dr770zDK3rkfuZ41J4iKExzb8cXXhf7c1zA4v_Mzbz6dAWFbYxU/w640-h480/IMG_3623.jpeg" title="Te Whakaora Tangata - "Life Restoration for the People"" width="640" /></a></div><br /><p>Three months later, here I am, so very grateful to be part of <a href="https://tewhakaora.org.nz/" target="_blank">this incredible organisation.</a></p><p>At my job interview, I was told, "we're like a family here." And I thought, <i>sure</i>.</p><p>I was told, "you can bring your whole self to this job; we're here to see you develop and grow and support you and your family..."</p><p>They said, "we've been holding this job open, waiting for the right person..."</p><p>And that person turns out to be me.</p><p>Me - who still has something to offer, a part to play. </p><p>Me - a middle-aged, tired, divorced, disillusioned Christian with barely a flicker of light to share.</p><p>Me with my messy life, iffy mental health and struggling kids.</p><p>Me - finding purpose and passion again. </p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgJFcjziYaEPbSOuCEhLURkEA69GtFN8DK9_oeXaGZZY9k8oWp04Q750XNoKuWSfj2wGD7fz_qB_6fjcn_-cu35xyjlD77yAwklDY-iv04gg8onk43yckQNan0iYoWxNGQ-cez7lN8mV2g/s3088/IMG_3427.jpeg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="Bringing our new puppy home" border="0" data-original-height="2316" data-original-width="3088" height="480" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgJFcjziYaEPbSOuCEhLURkEA69GtFN8DK9_oeXaGZZY9k8oWp04Q750XNoKuWSfj2wGD7fz_qB_6fjcn_-cu35xyjlD77yAwklDY-iv04gg8onk43yckQNan0iYoWxNGQ-cez7lN8mV2g/w640-h480/IMG_3427.jpeg" title="Bringing our new puppy home" width="640" /></a></div><br /><p>Turns out I'm not over. God is not done with me. He has brought me to work at a place that embodies all that I have ever been passionate about, but he has also brought me here to help us heal.</p><p>All I could see were the messy threads of my life, knotty and snarled, like the back of a tapestry... but now I begin to see how each thread has added something necessary and important to the overall design. Nothing is wasted. And I find I am indeed able to bring all of myself to my new job, contributing something worthwhile to <a href="https://tewhakaora.org.nz/" target="_blank">this organisation </a>that works to see families transformed. Families like mine.</p><p>Why was today so emotional? </p><p>Yeah, all that Covid/kid-related angst, sure. But what began with tears of overwhelm, anxiety and sorrow at the brokenness in my family, ended with tears of gratitude. </p><p>Tears flowed every time I got another message or had another conversation with a beautiful workmate: "We prayed for you this morning, we prayed for your family... we're with you, Simone. We care about you. You're not alone anymore. Let us know if you need someone to come and bring you groceries..."</p><p>This thing that I feel... this tender, raw, tearful grateful feeling? I think it's hope.</p><p><br /></p>Simoneyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09554122579485306611noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4940553413759896971.post-63794834254202385732021-07-06T20:26:00.005+12:002021-07-06T20:41:05.826+12:00R.I.P. Dear Dave<p> <a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiu0tQvLzxWBAWxmWK_9Fj13pjXkwLKxXDE0wD624Xk5pMx1wDFZY-ASEwPLT12KpTlM8KcRsQoJLzUdWOA8VlGZjvp_JejWY87S-M8ZjZ-NveHhogPi9Waf6zKz2h2muZCyzCQR7G7FIc/s600/213811757_196228219098211_8727370870690125975_n.jpg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em; text-align: center;"><img border="0" data-original-height="450" data-original-width="600" height="480" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiu0tQvLzxWBAWxmWK_9Fj13pjXkwLKxXDE0wD624Xk5pMx1wDFZY-ASEwPLT12KpTlM8KcRsQoJLzUdWOA8VlGZjvp_JejWY87S-M8ZjZ-NveHhogPi9Waf6zKz2h2muZCyzCQR7G7FIc/w640-h480/213811757_196228219098211_8727370870690125975_n.jpg" width="640" /></a></p><br />Today was full of heartbreak. The end of the road for our fluffy little tabby cat, Dave.<p></p><p>She came to us in March 2011, sitting on our back porch and wooing us all with her big green eyes until we had to take her in.</p><p>She has been with us through thick and thin, for almost as long as the kids can remember.</p><p>Always a constant presence. A warm furry body to snuggle away a sleepless child's anxiety. The jingle bell on her collar, warning birds to beware. The hum of her purr as she settled herself on the hip or belly of whoever sat still long enough in a sunny spot.</p><p>There's a legend that she was a street cat, a fighter. Sometimes she'd disappear for days, reappearing with sticky fur or nicks taken out of her ears.</p><p>But she always came home.</p><span><a name='more'></a></span><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjZZPAikiznDUDx0vhyphenhyphenO9H4zJ5bvCrIpRzLEgQ1eR3ACkOmi6tdLuEG4ozvF8Mgx1Vgzo-8gfRFwctyTcbQpsjc_0WtGoO87FP9eInR8b0csQiL0IQtCVgDdRJ5LKkvLVZ9iUsShgLOgmk/s600/203078575_318794109922574_6870858744449630956_n.jpg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><br /><img border="0" data-original-height="450" data-original-width="600" height="480" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjZZPAikiznDUDx0vhyphenhyphenO9H4zJ5bvCrIpRzLEgQ1eR3ACkOmi6tdLuEG4ozvF8Mgx1Vgzo-8gfRFwctyTcbQpsjc_0WtGoO87FP9eInR8b0csQiL0IQtCVgDdRJ5LKkvLVZ9iUsShgLOgmk/w640-h480/203078575_318794109922574_6870858744449630956_n.jpg" width="640" /></a></div><p></p><p>We knew Dave was old, but were never sure exactly HOW old - she was already full-grown when she adopted us more than ten years ago.</p><p>Dash wrote this, March 2011:</p><p><span style="font-family: courier;">"<span style="background-color: white; color: #636363; font-size: 16px;">On Friday I saw a cat. </span><span style="background-color: white; color: #636363; font-size: 16px;">Me and Scrag wanted to keep it and when Fab came back she saw the cat and she wanted to keep it too. </span><span style="background-color: white; color: #636363; font-size: 16px;">That night I was sad because my parents wouldn't let us, and it was raining. </span><span style="background-color: white; color: #636363; font-size: 16px;">The cat wanted to come in but it couldn't... </span><span style="background-color: white; color: #636363; font-size: 16px;">cos it might of had some germs or fleas. </span></span></p><p><span style="font-family: courier;"><span style="background-color: white; color: #636363; font-size: 16px;">On Monday my mum got it some cat food biscuits. </span><span style="background-color: white; color: #636363; font-size: 16px;">We have adopted it and it has adopted us.</span></span></p><div><span style="font-family: courier;"><span style="background-color: white; color: #636363; font-size: 16px;">He is black and grey stripes. </span><span style="background-color: white; color: #636363; font-size: 16px;">We have called him Dave, which is short for "Dave Shaun Allan", my favourite name. </span><span style="background-color: white; color: #636363; font-size: 16px;">(</span><strong style="background-color: white; color: #636363; font-size: 16px;">Dave</strong><span style="background-color: white; color: #636363; font-size: 16px;"> off Alvin and the Chipmunks, </span><strong style="background-color: white; color: #636363; font-size: 16px;">Allen </strong><span style="background-color: white; color: #636363; font-size: 16px;">off my Uncle Allan and </span><strong style="background-color: white; color: #636363; font-size: 16px;">Shaun </strong><span style="background-color: white; color: #636363; font-size: 16px;">off a random name)"</span></span></div><div><span style="font-family: courier;"><span style="background-color: white; color: #636363; font-size: 16px;"><br /></span></span></div><div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjfMYhtoerbLJMGQzIHW66vNN_tvQb8zIr8-row4IzFr7UW9x7P78kYE-PJGFS4_3PbI6zFVWFqGXoMPpt8S-Fn62VfmTAWlmwcVV4aL0rJ3DsfYlcfj1wNnTqpnf7B73KebCmzE43kyMg/s600/213489336_932214044012264_7954936686620790590_n.jpg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="450" data-original-width="600" height="480" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjfMYhtoerbLJMGQzIHW66vNN_tvQb8zIr8-row4IzFr7UW9x7P78kYE-PJGFS4_3PbI6zFVWFqGXoMPpt8S-Fn62VfmTAWlmwcVV4aL0rJ3DsfYlcfj1wNnTqpnf7B73KebCmzE43kyMg/w640-h480/213489336_932214044012264_7954936686620790590_n.jpg" width="640" /></a></div><p>At the same time, Miss Fab wrote:</p><div style="background-color: white; color: #797979; font-size: 14.85px;"><span style="font-family: courier;">"I love Dave so much he is my best buddy.</span></div><div style="background-color: white; color: #797979; font-size: 14.85px;"><span style="font-family: courier;">He is also my brother's best pal too. We don't really know if dave is a boy or a girl yet."</span></div><div style="background-color: white; color: #797979; font-family: Cantarell; font-size: 14.85px;"><br /></div>[Spoiler Alert - she was a girl. But the name stayed.]<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgFg1FRuwsJjG06XjJVPO4xSSnDQUpbwDRStqELjsx2KNWS0A1QbQrnKn16rOelPu9yBOKxzdsFP8L0j8c0TUOcBRIxs6Qs2TbULiDgm2Z2Qp8Ogyft3olJjkEwQQ_tdtK8G3yAxbNxvf8/s600/212098140_153890893474821_8033200402759976642_n.jpg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="450" data-original-width="600" height="480" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgFg1FRuwsJjG06XjJVPO4xSSnDQUpbwDRStqELjsx2KNWS0A1QbQrnKn16rOelPu9yBOKxzdsFP8L0j8c0TUOcBRIxs6Qs2TbULiDgm2Z2Qp8Ogyft3olJjkEwQQ_tdtK8G3yAxbNxvf8/w640-h480/212098140_153890893474821_8033200402759976642_n.jpg" width="640" /></a></div><p>Yesterday Dash called, distraught, as I was on my way home from work.</p><p>"Mum, I think Dave's dying. She won't eat and she's breathing funny..."</p> Our little Dave died this morning of old age. Her poor little lungs filled up with fluid and her organs failed. </div><div><br /></div><div>We took her to the vet yesterday and they said they didn’t think she’d make it through the night. <div>Dash and his girlfriend sat vigil with her last night and she fought on. </div><div><br /></div><div>This morning we were holding her when she died; about to take her back to the vet to put her out of her pain when she passed. </div><div>We were all sobbing.</div><div><br /></div><div>The kids wanted to bury her at the old house next to their granddad's ashes, so that's what they did, with help from their dad.</div><div>They wrapped Dave up and buried her with little notes and special things in the place that was their childhood home. </div><div><br /></div><div>We are all so very sad. </div><div><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiAZziAi63IR3uUyhJ8tO3hE7Jonxyw5bmMUfYGmm1nxMazt9GPUHyKlkOeonWR-LvOemN51ovShyO0zXORviEMbUPcaJmqpKX-Oyz9PDicjje8xoPhWCVmx41CFupmwbkYRZuEE4Nw80Q/s600/213134055_4258893434150562_6174477530276402952_n.jpg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="450" data-original-width="600" height="480" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiAZziAi63IR3uUyhJ8tO3hE7Jonxyw5bmMUfYGmm1nxMazt9GPUHyKlkOeonWR-LvOemN51ovShyO0zXORviEMbUPcaJmqpKX-Oyz9PDicjje8xoPhWCVmx41CFupmwbkYRZuEE4Nw80Q/w640-h480/213134055_4258893434150562_6174477530276402952_n.jpg" width="640" /></a></div><br /><div style="text-align: center;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: center;"><b>RIP Dave Shaun Allen.</b></div><div style="text-align: center;"><br /></div><div><div style="text-align: center;">Bird chaser.</div><div style="text-align: center;">Roof climber.</div></div><div style="text-align: center;">Lady of the Streets.</div><div style="text-align: center;">Queen of our backyard.</div><div style="text-align: center;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: center;">Gone but never forgotten. </div><div><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhMNZ1nBK7Im_SGWNAhsTqNgYB3EqpDxIlH9anOej2eKTmWxnHeMogx3F9Mlj2H2wpF0NST5FZ36_1EREppJEBZEH95-68UhGGDOFaFw4IsUK6_jfYAfBEF-B3GKuusUQQCy4WrEVULvKk/s750/211572023_560142951647450_1447625183374949999_n.jpg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="750" data-original-width="600" height="640" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhMNZ1nBK7Im_SGWNAhsTqNgYB3EqpDxIlH9anOej2eKTmWxnHeMogx3F9Mlj2H2wpF0NST5FZ36_1EREppJEBZEH95-68UhGGDOFaFw4IsUK6_jfYAfBEF-B3GKuusUQQCy4WrEVULvKk/w512-h640/211572023_560142951647450_1447625183374949999_n.jpg" width="512" /></a></div><br /><div><br /></div><div><span style="font-family: courier;"><b>DAVE STORIES:</b></span></div><div><ul style="text-align: left;"><li><a href="http://sportydash.blogspot.com/2011/03/my-cat-called-dave.html" target="_blank"><span style="font-family: courier;">My Cat Dave, by Dash, age 8</span></a></li><li><a href="http://abfabblab.blogspot.com/2011/03/i-dave.html" target="_blank"><span style="font-family: courier;">My Cat Dave, by Miss fab, age 6 </span></a></li><li><a href="http://www.greatfun4kidsblog.com/2011/03/wordless-wednesday-dave.html" target="_blank"><span style="font-family: courier;">We fell in Love with a little Striped Cat</span></a></li><li><a href="http://www.greatfun4kidsblog.com/2011/11/baby-bird-where-you-gone.html" target="_blank"><span style="font-family: courier;">Dave and the Bird</span></a></li></ul><p><br /></p></div></div>Simoneyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09554122579485306611noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4940553413759896971.post-30792747926188463152020-10-09T16:12:00.003+13:002021-07-06T21:13:11.055+12:00The times they are a-changin'<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgyXlDDFNoiOawgNzKUwmxD6pQgMih4gzyY9xw81f4mBFpfsreoSe4TViyj-fx6xg5IT55mwfWPe1WAA-MSGc_j4l-oLDCKr08iQPt5BAYdsClqfdsRn0Oa1GEN3hbI4LlBNAA5dNLtJgY/s2048/IMG_2549.JPEG" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1536" data-original-width="2048" height="480" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgyXlDDFNoiOawgNzKUwmxD6pQgMih4gzyY9xw81f4mBFpfsreoSe4TViyj-fx6xg5IT55mwfWPe1WAA-MSGc_j4l-oLDCKr08iQPt5BAYdsClqfdsRn0Oa1GEN3hbI4LlBNAA5dNLtJgY/w640-h480/IMG_2549.JPEG" width="640" /></a></div><p>It is 2020, the year the world went to hell in a handbasket. The year of Covid and lockdowns and wildfires and crazy elections. The whole world is reeling with the pace of change.</p><p>And not to be left out, here in my little corner of the world, we are also facing massive changes and the end of an era. </p><p>You see folks, my eldest manchild, the one who made me a mother, turns 18 next month.<span></span></p><a name='more'></a><p></p><p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgpmCTcqSso6KQbZux1b4uEy8woK5umB9xaafgdXNKDZYqFYz_DxbLy1AGalCjxOrtTu72Xu7xO3ktW6u74Lj6SpK0XDbDlZFBRNTYYzUV_zZQBbb2lK8YPd1DlsExwu83MOLGgy40M60Q/s1152/baby+Josh+2.png" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="My firstborn" border="0" data-original-height="708" data-original-width="1152" height="394" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgpmCTcqSso6KQbZux1b4uEy8woK5umB9xaafgdXNKDZYqFYz_DxbLy1AGalCjxOrtTu72Xu7xO3ktW6u74Lj6SpK0XDbDlZFBRNTYYzUV_zZQBbb2lK8YPd1DlsExwu83MOLGgy40M60Q/w640-h394/baby+Josh+2.png" title="My firstborn" width="640" /></a></div><p>In November, he will be of voting age (just a month too late), the legal drinking age, will sit his restricted driver's licence (and will hopefully pass this time) AND he will finish school.</p><p></p><p><br /></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjl0BuPQg51aS3yVu-JiWLyigsBxCKcQ_p0IhYCaGY0BJJOeUuBGmNDQyks-7S7nYCpnaSFPqlCH8tsxYKZMeps-Ox2j4rJEWYDH4FChJ6ILcoCYHOtm1300dss3N4B2x4RtEC-y-q57m0/s1152/Josh+growing+up.png" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="At Intermediate (left) and dressed in formals to represent his school at football (right)" border="0" data-original-height="708" data-original-width="1152" height="394" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjl0BuPQg51aS3yVu-JiWLyigsBxCKcQ_p0IhYCaGY0BJJOeUuBGmNDQyks-7S7nYCpnaSFPqlCH8tsxYKZMeps-Ox2j4rJEWYDH4FChJ6ILcoCYHOtm1300dss3N4B2x4RtEC-y-q57m0/w640-h394/Josh+growing+up.png" title="At Intermediate (left) and dressed in formals to represent his school at football (right)" width="640" /></a></div><br />My first child. Done with school. Bye-bye uniforms and football practise and parent-teacher meetings.<p></p><p>He is nearly done - and he knows where he is headed.</p><p>He has been accepted to Lincoln University Diploma in Agriculture, so will be heading to live and study in Christchurch.</p><p>Christchurch. It's on a whole other island.</p><p>Can we just pause for a moment and take in the awesomeness of this fact:</p><p>My son - who struggled through primary and intermediate school <a href="http://www.greatfun4kidsblog.com/2016/05/in-defense-of-ritalin-and-adhd-kids.html" target="_blank"><b>with undiagnosed ADHD </b></a>- has not only made it through high school <i>but will go to University.</i></p><p>He did it! He achieved this University Entrance requirements and NCEA Level Two last year. It is enough to get into the course he wants to do, so thankfully this year, this dumpster-fire of a Covid-blasted year, <i>doesn't matter</i>.</p><p><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj-gNSyFQCnfqmKhaNQAmzrbPsHUjOvDQMDqLHqphNjjaZxD5qnlYnJtw2ra5PQSyof3_pcTedxvsgkRWW1IahEEI6GlYMEsSpLmr-vnC2be3bm-eMEnF3EWFA2PvWVfVxEDWgukfp6ATA/s2048/IMG_2173.JPG" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em; text-align: center;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1536" data-original-width="2048" height="480" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj-gNSyFQCnfqmKhaNQAmzrbPsHUjOvDQMDqLHqphNjjaZxD5qnlYnJtw2ra5PQSyof3_pcTedxvsgkRWW1IahEEI6GlYMEsSpLmr-vnC2be3bm-eMEnF3EWFA2PvWVfVxEDWgukfp6ATA/w640-h480/IMG_2173.JPG" width="640" /></a></p><p>If you could see me right now you'd know just how proud of him I am.</p><p>Proud of the way he pushed through his difficulties.</p><p>Proud of the way he has faced down his personal demons this year - and conquered them.</p><p>Proud of the empathy and insight I see growing in him.</p><p>Proud of the fact that he never gave up, or quit, even when it was bloddy hard for him.</p><p>My mother's heart is just bursting with pride in this young man I have somehow managed to raise, by the seat of my pants.</p><p>Apparently a Diploma in Agriculture is just the beginning for my boy. He's a smart lad and knows that New Zealand will always need farm workers... but he has other ambitions as well. </p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhH_a7mGIeJVSEkc0ZDyseTx4_pbZZu-PCo2Pzk9-PfcjtTmdzVR-7W4b5iTk9ogWqOhIE1Oetyi4yP6UMykVuVOIiVFG2BPDygZXemhozI6brbABlDuwVLZ1RTVOEeoycg4r-dNWUXUc8/s2048/IMG_2541.JPG" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em; text-align: center;"><img alt="My boy spent Christmas 2019 in the UK with dad's family" border="0" data-original-height="1536" data-original-width="2048" height="480" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhH_a7mGIeJVSEkc0ZDyseTx4_pbZZu-PCo2Pzk9-PfcjtTmdzVR-7W4b5iTk9ogWqOhIE1Oetyi4yP6UMykVuVOIiVFG2BPDygZXemhozI6brbABlDuwVLZ1RTVOEeoycg4r-dNWUXUc8/w640-h480/IMG_2541.JPG" title="My boy spent Christmas 2019 in the UK with dad's family" width="640" /></a><br /><p>He has told me that down the track, when he has a bit more of life under his belt, what he really wants to do is train as a social worker or a counsellor. Something where he can help kids who have struggled with some of the things he has been through.</p><p>I can't even.</p><p>So yeah. We have a few precious months left together all under one roof. Three months and my first baby bird will be flying the nest to Christchurch, to University and to the big wide world.</p><p>Of course he may well boomerang back at some point, but this is a massive step towards independence and adulthood.</p><p>With my first baby leaving home and my last baby starting high school next year, it really is the end of an era - the times, they really are a-changing. </p><p>..................................</p><p><i>UPDATE:</i></p><p><i>We are well into 2021 now - it's July - and although we turned 18, we did not go to Christchurch. It was a step too far, too soon. We are working on wellbeing goals, licenses and work training, here at home in Auckland close to family, support networks, friends and girlfriend. University is on hold for another time, after some more of life under our belt and we are clear on what we want to study. Not farming, not sport... we'll train and work and do life and figure our future out a step at a time, enjoying the journey. No pressure to live up to anyone's expectations because Life is more than work and study. Life is connections and healing and mental health and building confidence and belonging. And there's no rush - it's a marathon not a sprint.</i></p>Simoneyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09554122579485306611noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4940553413759896971.post-26246252910873148372020-07-12T14:00:00.003+12:002020-07-12T16:12:02.400+12:00The Urge to Write is Upon Me<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEit3_c6tlDsZvW7VIBmC6lfPR0ZWzJCgjtGA8dLnfpMZuYMwJmfUxmk01q02VuL3Kk4LaT6zV-Kv4t9BhILMIpX5yscaJMRqVvj4pFoOBnxSrpw_Twyv9woYJqh6V5E_m8BuVRZ-Givvkk/s1600/1_3RSC6rVlpzER2Ipb3fHrTg.jpeg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="The Urge to Write is Upon Me" border="0" data-original-height="900" data-original-width="1600" height="360" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEit3_c6tlDsZvW7VIBmC6lfPR0ZWzJCgjtGA8dLnfpMZuYMwJmfUxmk01q02VuL3Kk4LaT6zV-Kv4t9BhILMIpX5yscaJMRqVvj4pFoOBnxSrpw_Twyv9woYJqh6V5E_m8BuVRZ-Givvkk/s640/1_3RSC6rVlpzER2Ipb3fHrTg.jpeg" title="The Urge to Write is Upon Me" width="640" /></a></div>
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In the past few weeks, I have written multiple stories in my head. So many thoughts, issues, feelings and words needing to be expressed, but where to start? What to focus on?<br />
I just didn't know where to begin.<br />
But today I sat down, opened up my laptop and began to write, without a clear direction, just needing to satisfy this urge to write, while it is upon me.<br />
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<a name='more'></a><br />
Over the last four years, <a href="http://www.greatfun4kidsblog.com/2019/04/from-ashes.html" target="_blank"><b>after the end of my marriage</b></a>, it became impossible, then simply difficult to write here the way I once did, but something held me back from completely shutting down this platform. I worked so long and so hard to build it, you see. The stories collected here are a collection of freeze-frames from my life "before". Precious vignettes of childhoods, moments recorded that would otherwise be forgotten... and all those parties.<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjwR3y2enebH5zCLsuI5EvafqB6aLyvqpfcQLptrW-U5DTYMJIUWPP8_GNopocv8O1hFvzZvlt3r6RjIw5QJQSoQ5BxwdSPrXyiwtkK7RSZvj_WKrYatlvO296UXqTbOconyugez1GRv6I/s1600/Parties+collage.jpg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="So many parties... so many good memories" border="0" data-original-height="866" data-original-width="1366" height="404" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjwR3y2enebH5zCLsuI5EvafqB6aLyvqpfcQLptrW-U5DTYMJIUWPP8_GNopocv8O1hFvzZvlt3r6RjIw5QJQSoQ5BxwdSPrXyiwtkK7RSZvj_WKrYatlvO296UXqTbOconyugez1GRv6I/s640/Parties+collage.jpg" title="So many parties... so many good memories" width="640" /></a></div>
<br />
When my kids have looked back on their childhoods, marred as they now are by trauma and loss, the <a href="http://www.greatfun4kidsblog.com/p/party-stuff.html" target="_blank"><b>parties</b> </a>are what stands out to them as high points. I'm so glad I did the parties. The parties remain as unblemished memories of pure delight.<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj8n4cDbPhZsqO9ZkdKJevoZ8_hIKM9O6F9x48ah0XAAIdvjcRaQM5ohJ_por3GK2pfB8nIEkynWbsEXu5WiY9vTEcw3jhPvlgBtXkJmVm_OL91BUUuSJfBZfIiql44EZoabUN7IqHXtH0/s1600/DSC01541.JPG" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="My babies when this blog began in 2009" border="0" data-original-height="240" data-original-width="320" height="480" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj8n4cDbPhZsqO9ZkdKJevoZ8_hIKM9O6F9x48ah0XAAIdvjcRaQM5ohJ_por3GK2pfB8nIEkynWbsEXu5WiY9vTEcw3jhPvlgBtXkJmVm_OL91BUUuSJfBZfIiql44EZoabUN7IqHXtH0/s640/DSC01541.JPG" title="My babies when this blog began in 2009" width="640" /></a></div>
<br />
When I started writing this blog, my babies were aged five, four and eight months old.<br />
When I stopped writing regularly four years ago, they were 13, 11 and eight.<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi5bzH3SyCi7DrrigYkUYSu-bg-BFVs41fE-TA19zu4JbEjWKYtlD3mScIl-1eNILg0Ydj0TCptIGStXxF2kewZKcSorH0drxdZvDR2CcAcvW565alL7XHrV3FKAfq1O81CnT75bdmzbNE/s1600/Mothers+Day+2016.jpg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="My babies when my marriage ended in 2016" border="0" data-original-height="588" data-original-width="960" height="392" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi5bzH3SyCi7DrrigYkUYSu-bg-BFVs41fE-TA19zu4JbEjWKYtlD3mScIl-1eNILg0Ydj0TCptIGStXxF2kewZKcSorH0drxdZvDR2CcAcvW565alL7XHrV3FKAfq1O81CnT75bdmzbNE/s640/Mothers+Day+2016.jpg" title="My babies when my marriage ended in 2016" width="640" /></a></div>
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Now I have in my care a six-foot tall young man of 17-and-a-half. A nearly-sixteen-year-old goddess and a taller-than-me twelvie.<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjzJrRQek8UobB6D23v7LyzuoMac7BTo8sZNibA4jWZQ78Le1TirWRVqSU8Wi-KE8EJcqYooIzoefyLzodstTJ2Q__OnxE4-IiEP3kIYAQNxll5U8K6fAZtppT9efPnTIimDMsIxEPWmfY/s1600/IMG_2173.JPG" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="My babies in February 2020 - now ALL taller than me" border="0" data-original-height="1200" data-original-width="1600" height="480" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjzJrRQek8UobB6D23v7LyzuoMac7BTo8sZNibA4jWZQ78Le1TirWRVqSU8Wi-KE8EJcqYooIzoefyLzodstTJ2Q__OnxE4-IiEP3kIYAQNxll5U8K6fAZtppT9efPnTIimDMsIxEPWmfY/s640/IMG_2173.JPG" title="My babies in February 2020 - now ALL taller than me" width="640" /></a></div>
<br />
This collection of humans that I am responsible to prepare for life in the wide world are most precious.<br />
<br />
Their hurts have been my hurts, their anxieties became mine. Their ups and downs have led me on a merry rollercoaster of emotions... and my whole world was focused on trying to help them be OK.<br />
True to form, I put myself last. How could I spare time for myself when a child of mine was in pain and struggling? How could I attend to my own need to heal when my child's wounds were aching?<br />
<br />
I forgot the Oxygen Mask Principle.<br />
When traveling with children, put your own mask on first (so you don't pass out and render yourself useless to assist them).<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiipYJG0Sjgv7e3k_hX994I4WYJxQD9wHlzYDP7hbPwqfeQCHC6wO6fcFobMiq9ekKALMVon771YPpiYtbWKuZyF6DXcKoRxY_wFsVJwvudo4twVDI7bdFkF8ptK3WYKbAHc2pD_S-2LvE/s1600/794873_81_77297_Bi9rpkiXf.jpeg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em; text-align: center;"><img border="0" data-original-height="500" data-original-width="750" height="426" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiipYJG0Sjgv7e3k_hX994I4WYJxQD9wHlzYDP7hbPwqfeQCHC6wO6fcFobMiq9ekKALMVon771YPpiYtbWKuZyF6DXcKoRxY_wFsVJwvudo4twVDI7bdFkF8ptK3WYKbAHc2pD_S-2LvE/s640/794873_81_77297_Bi9rpkiXf.jpeg" width="640" /></a></div>
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<br />
Consequently, I have been dragging my sorry ass through life for the past four years, going through the motions but finding little joy. Focused on my children's wounds, I have ignored the gaping bleeding holes in my own heart and wondered why my efforts to help my kids were yielding faint results.<br />
<br />
But about six weeks ago, something finally penetrated my noggin. If my kids can't see me healing and moving forward with anticipation and hope for my own life, how can I ever impart hope to them for theirs?<br />
<br />
If my future is bleak and empty and lonely, how will I ever convince them that their future is full of promise?<br />
<br />
So I have started to prioritise my own healing.<br />
This is hard for me, because I am not used to focusing on myself. I am not in the habit of taking time or spending money on my own needs.<br />
This is not comfortable. But it is needed.<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiT450mcCYw94Pu1VqfBPo2FmEKvhyMKV6CRRbhvX1V-QfQVcrpHcWCqujEUkMy5RWscZLPbiUclBMy1gaYAenUgf8bS8zV4ujErz0gC9i5Pom8EPBrWMJxojSNado5CLurrK44evSRsmc/s1600/IMG_1821.JPG" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="Me and our family snuggle buddy, Clyde the rescue dog" border="0" data-original-height="960" data-original-width="1280" height="480" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiT450mcCYw94Pu1VqfBPo2FmEKvhyMKV6CRRbhvX1V-QfQVcrpHcWCqujEUkMy5RWscZLPbiUclBMy1gaYAenUgf8bS8zV4ujErz0gC9i5Pom8EPBrWMJxojSNado5CLurrK44evSRsmc/s640/IMG_1821.JPG" title="Me and our family snuggle buddy, Clyde the rescue dog" width="640" /></a></div>
<br />
In the past six weeks I have faced down and worked through more issues - and healed from them - than I have in the last twenty years. Not a word of a lie, no exaggeration.<br />
Deep deep shifts have occurred and the result is that my most intuitive child (the girl of course) has seen the difference in me (the boys are a bit oblivious).<br />
<br />
She said to me, "Mum I can see the difference in you. I can see you are happier and that helps me to feel happier too..."<br />
<br />
The Oxygen Mask Principle works.<br />
This is not the same as white-knuckling it or faking it til I make it.<br />
This is sitting with the damage, feeling the feelings and facing it all for the first time.<br />
There have been long sleepless nights of tears and prayers.<br />
There has been watching the amazing series <a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=K1-FoFj8Jbo" target="_blank"><b>The Chosen </b></a>and seeing Jesus fleshed out on screen just as I imagined him, full of compassion for us humans.<br />
Wrestling with my "religious" upbringing and the way I approached relationships with all that baggage. Reading books which deeply resonate and helped free me from old unhelpful mindsets.<br />
Participating in threads discussing hard issues and realising that I have a unique voice as a peacemaker and advocate.<br />
There have been tough conversations, more tears, and realising that actually, my life isn't over.<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj0FzuS2_LMWLTJIhW-3rPflkQK5UGNhyphenhyphenRjTXky2LW0JD6cc5wvMd1E_fN18Upa-pm6olasEeLdoj51kA33hlu8pJ10NHgNXZH-6RtN8PLxAnx_36J_6JI3s0-oFo1AL6vEwZiGOV7nGY4/s1600/collage+of+me.jpg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="A patchwork of Me" border="0" data-original-height="768" data-original-width="1366" height="358" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj0FzuS2_LMWLTJIhW-3rPflkQK5UGNhyphenhyphenRjTXky2LW0JD6cc5wvMd1E_fN18Upa-pm6olasEeLdoj51kA33hlu8pJ10NHgNXZH-6RtN8PLxAnx_36J_6JI3s0-oFo1AL6vEwZiGOV7nGY4/s640/collage+of+me.jpg" title="A patchwork of Me" width="640" /></a></div>
<br />
I'm not a background character in my own story.<br />
And actually, my story is unscripted. It's a blank page.<br />
Who knows what the future might hold? (Maybe I <i>could </i>meet somebody. Maybe I <i>won't </i>always be alone and unloved. There is still hope.)<br />
All of this has lifted the lid off my life. Where my future looked like a dark cramped lonely thing, now there is a question mark of possibility.<br />
<br />
Healing has begun. And as I have started to engage with the healing process I have found that I want to be kinder and more caring towards myself.<br />
<br />
Spending money on a haircut. Investing in a good face cream. Colouring my greys. And enjoying at-home spas with my daughter - face masks, candles and relaxing music.<br />
<br />
Little things that send the signal that I am worth it. I am valuable. I am not over.<br />
<br />
<b>Maybe someone reading this needs to hear this today.</b><br />
<b>If you are like me, struggling to prioritise yourself because you weren't raised that way, please take this to heart: the best thing you can do for your children is give them the gift of a healed mum who knows her own value.</b><br />
<br />
<i>Much love to you all xx</i><br />
<i>-Simoney</i><br />
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<br />Simoneyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09554122579485306611noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4940553413759896971.post-7304792980317010172020-05-13T15:21:00.000+12:002020-05-18T10:51:29.088+12:00"Stop the World, I want to Get Off!" she said...<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgotGldL-ohmXR5H-vB6SmcZbK1685oqQxylTlbUcLDPAH4349aF599fcw8OOQ4YMfsLav45soudQdA1UKvKq1nzOB3MmzbnXLMHZJS1bCeo7L4PWGxNgjtnHj0QAhCLmVWE85_pDzb6ug/s1600/IMG_2261.JPEG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em; text-align: center;"><img alt="My House at twilight returning from a lockdown dog-walk" border="0" data-original-height="1200" data-original-width="1600" height="480" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgotGldL-ohmXR5H-vB6SmcZbK1685oqQxylTlbUcLDPAH4349aF599fcw8OOQ4YMfsLav45soudQdA1UKvKq1nzOB3MmzbnXLMHZJS1bCeo7L4PWGxNgjtnHj0QAhCLmVWE85_pDzb6ug/s640/IMG_2261.JPEG" title="My House at twilight returning from a lockdown dog-walk" width="640" /></a></div>
<br />
<br />
I don't know how many times I must have said this out loud, to myself or in my head.<br />
<i>Stop the World. I want to Get Off.</i><br />
<br />
Life was too fast. It came at me from all directions and I could never, ever catch my breath.<br />
Since becoming a sole-parent nearly four years ago and re-entering the paid workforce, life has been faster than ever.<br />
<br />
Endless days of driving kids from place to place, juggling chores and work and parenting.<br />
I once totalled up the amount of time I spent in my car each week during winter sport season and it came out to more than 20 hours. That's half a full-time job, just on driving.<br />
No wonder I wanted it all to stop.<br />
<br />
How many times did I say to my kids, "ONE DAY! JUST ONE DAY is all I want. ONE DAY where I don't have to drive ANYWHERE..."<br />
<br />
Well, I got my wish, didn't I?<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEggGOgQ7qntEDGv_Wib_etJeIjw7mtx3ViaKVjIb5WGZZkkFIEG6BpY4gZxB6OJXtQt5t303RJZ7eOQ4ExEoBpUFT0XAzrvV5JNAVq-eEG_weDm_ac_wtXC2aHrlJSlbg-S6NlIBnhiAQ8/s1600/IMG_2272.JPEG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="Bubble Buddies - lots of tiktoks" border="0" data-original-height="1180" data-original-width="1600" height="472" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEggGOgQ7qntEDGv_Wib_etJeIjw7mtx3ViaKVjIb5WGZZkkFIEG6BpY4gZxB6OJXtQt5t303RJZ7eOQ4ExEoBpUFT0XAzrvV5JNAVq-eEG_weDm_ac_wtXC2aHrlJSlbg-S6NlIBnhiAQ8/s640/IMG_2272.JPEG" title="Bubble Buddies - lots of tiktoks" width="640" /></a></div>
<br />
The world stopped. And for weeks and weeks I have hardly had to drive anywhere.<br />
I've been lucky to be able to keep working my two part-time jobs from home.<br />
I can't say that I haven't enjoyed that. I have.<br />
Slower days with nowhere else to be. The silver lining to the Covid Cloud.<br />
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<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgEMeGD6F4qiwGbBuZOUgtflmoqFBs-tds6Dyy4sCAqbBLcvDjRO4VpLqikZeHq_ktW3497T-L1Egn90LAMSSDlvIPxFOW6oePRkC4LjaFe6b87vvbVxf8AvDNaLSU412i8vuUNG0RTUAw/s1600/our+new+art+deco+home.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img alt="Our Lockdown Lair - our lovely new Art Deco House " border="0" data-original-height="1067" data-original-width="1600" height="426" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgEMeGD6F4qiwGbBuZOUgtflmoqFBs-tds6Dyy4sCAqbBLcvDjRO4VpLqikZeHq_ktW3497T-L1Egn90LAMSSDlvIPxFOW6oePRkC4LjaFe6b87vvbVxf8AvDNaLSU412i8vuUNG0RTUAw/s640/our+new+art+deco+home.jpg" title="Our Lockdown Lair - our lovely new Art Deco House " width="640" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">It's been lovely being locked down in our gorgeous "new" home (been here for nearly a year now)</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
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<h3>
</h3>
<h2>
<span style="font-size: large;">
the upside of lockdown</span></h2>
With more time and less rush, I actually <i>almost </i>began enjoying cooking dinner again. I tried new recipes and even baked cinnamon scrolls one time. Where I thought I would hate having to cook every.single.night, I'm now kinda rocking it just a little.<br />
<br />
Takeaways are back to being a once-a-week treat instead of the way I cope with my endlessly rushing days. I feel good about that.<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhgCi3W_vNAJJVNpIvA8GQ7tex02WBYQhbPZ8OpsFVXf8xbDxJ1BIhHZDhWh5Jl0dmqqlNyiTHM9u4o6OJOsaHJG54i6JIHj0P6OtAvyFv48tIbS1-yviLHuBccrZ09jXvhNaAYDQr-Kts/s1600/IMG_2252.JPEG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="During Lockdown the only Pizza we had was the homemade kind" border="0" data-original-height="1200" data-original-width="1600" height="480" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhgCi3W_vNAJJVNpIvA8GQ7tex02WBYQhbPZ8OpsFVXf8xbDxJ1BIhHZDhWh5Jl0dmqqlNyiTHM9u4o6OJOsaHJG54i6JIHj0P6OtAvyFv48tIbS1-yviLHuBccrZ09jXvhNaAYDQr-Kts/s640/IMG_2252.JPEG" title="During Lockdown the only Pizza we had was the homemade kind" width="640" /></a></div>
<br />
With just each other for company, I reckon we've grown closer in our little bubble, too. I feel like we are all much better friends than we used to be.<br />
<br />
I sometimes catch snippets of conversations between the kids as they talk amongst themselves. It's been heartwarming to know that siblings are having private chats about life...<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgwWID4VRRwEMHslQ9Hf_PzBV_ZRp4N_marTxJnyhwoWeply_Pgw-T_ajZYuQUD724AmV_QR1woDn3FKE7FJIqWhlWsi2c7anUKr-pcXlfFZ8wvprFU3plfaqfdu5mYCIp5bKb017vqolo/s1600/IMG_2282.JPEG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="Scrag's Birthday "Mega-Feast" - we watched The Office a lot" border="0" data-original-height="1200" data-original-width="1600" height="480" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgwWID4VRRwEMHslQ9Hf_PzBV_ZRp4N_marTxJnyhwoWeply_Pgw-T_ajZYuQUD724AmV_QR1woDn3FKE7FJIqWhlWsi2c7anUKr-pcXlfFZ8wvprFU3plfaqfdu5mYCIp5bKb017vqolo/s640/IMG_2282.JPEG" title="Scrag's Birthday "Mega-Feast" - we watched The Office a lot" width="640" /></a></div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhZTD2-3_pFWqeepKuJCpb41lJSdGGYdD8sQ97dL-kTisKkfbej3MA7N50EEx_huJSfrwaahL6dzwsiTXJxBT5G5w6U1bqDoQqqA1o7Xd7vn8kAOU3PMb-rLMZyXcGLahuXVrHkSyQOO9g/s1600/IMG_2295.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1200" data-original-width="1600" height="480" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhZTD2-3_pFWqeepKuJCpb41lJSdGGYdD8sQ97dL-kTisKkfbej3MA7N50EEx_huJSfrwaahL6dzwsiTXJxBT5G5w6U1bqDoQqqA1o7Xd7vn8kAOU3PMb-rLMZyXcGLahuXVrHkSyQOO9g/s640/IMG_2295.JPG" width="640" /></a></div>
<br />
Scrag had his 12th birthday during lockdown, so we had to try our hardest to give him a special day. He requested a "Mega-Feast" for dinner featuring his favourite oven-baked treats, fizzy drinks and a supermarket layer cake. Instead of presents, he got a basket of treats that could be bought at the supermarket and some vouchers for after lockdown is over.<br />
<br />
He reckoned his day was "<i>decent</i>". In Scrag-speak "decent" is good. He's now taller than me and growing like a weed.<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhVxDKmJdqZjR50zCnVx85AumO3TX8RlUa4mFgIpAJPUv9nh4cMFrj3N7XG2a05JFByS-jpeRAxf5Z-djL8jdeM5hgkiUk8SuKAQ7nVljCGU5jWqImzPwhc1AOmqyeEPJ0S2qO6YZzNe6A/s1600/IMG_1127.JPEG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em; text-align: center;"><img alt="My Bubble Buddies" border="0" data-original-height="1203" data-original-width="1600" height="480" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhVxDKmJdqZjR50zCnVx85AumO3TX8RlUa4mFgIpAJPUv9nh4cMFrj3N7XG2a05JFByS-jpeRAxf5Z-djL8jdeM5hgkiUk8SuKAQ7nVljCGU5jWqImzPwhc1AOmqyeEPJ0S2qO6YZzNe6A/s640/IMG_1127.JPEG" title="My Bubble Buddies" width="640" /></a></div>
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<br />
When we've had our hard days - because we hit a few very big 'icebergs' along with way - I have loved the way they fiercely offered each other love and support. #bubblebuddies #hamsquad<br />
(One day I hope to write a story about mental health and kids - and the appalling state of our mental health services for young people. One day. When we're through all this.)<br />
<br />
Because it's not just me that has been thankful for the lockdown.<br />
I have a number of offspring who battle anxiety.<br />
Pre-lockdown, the fast pace of life and the social pressure to not be 'a weirdo who stays home' was a very real source of stress.<br />
When schools closed and socialising was banned, there was much rejoicing. One child turned to me and said, "Mum, I've been training for this for years..."<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjRk87_fmu5qzyVnCtBLBG1dpTJ_h7BPZhZq2MCQ_qaDEKHFM_LB6WAvinEJpEoU0IUcFfCHKfmb4qsGHuGrbpiGj12P5yeFAtq90MHHt2FwlVb_ujg9ysijNx7N6KLTPCXSo6TLwztgt8/s1600/IMG_2271+-2.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="They miss their friends but stay connected through technology" border="0" data-original-height="1185" data-original-width="1600" height="472" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjRk87_fmu5qzyVnCtBLBG1dpTJ_h7BPZhZq2MCQ_qaDEKHFM_LB6WAvinEJpEoU0IUcFfCHKfmb4qsGHuGrbpiGj12P5yeFAtq90MHHt2FwlVb_ujg9ysijNx7N6KLTPCXSo6TLwztgt8/s640/IMG_2271+-2.jpg" title="They miss their friends but stay connected through technology" width="640" /></a></div>
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Of course my kids have missed their friends - though technology has helped them stay connected.<br />
In Level 4, they also missed being able to go for a late-night McFlurry when insomnia hit - Level 3 has sorted that one out.<br />
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But now we are on the verge of returning to something like normal. Next week, schools go back. Sport training starts up again. I'm back working at the Office.<br />
And we aren't ready for that.<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEikICZhQxcja9Tsk2_K-Vavuoe-Wa9LGz9P4ORC_PJ2vmcDM7Vcaajm-jxFPT5CUtUxSZXR3j0AN5j5ihGhEey3BGQvvZBF6m9lX2Xnp5652858h45VO3hQWor7i7M3dBvgjpcrl1Wco-0/s1600/IMG_2301.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="My back deck is the most peaceful place at sunset" border="0" data-original-height="1200" data-original-width="1600" height="480" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEikICZhQxcja9Tsk2_K-Vavuoe-Wa9LGz9P4ORC_PJ2vmcDM7Vcaajm-jxFPT5CUtUxSZXR3j0AN5j5ihGhEey3BGQvvZBF6m9lX2Xnp5652858h45VO3hQWor7i7M3dBvgjpcrl1Wco-0/s640/IMG_2301.JPG" title="My back deck is the most peaceful place at sunset" width="640" /></a></div>
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I am feeling quite anxious about it all, to be honest. And so are a few of my kids.<br />
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My mind starts to race and my heart starts to pound when I think of all the driving, the petrol, the rush to be on time, the daily agony of dragging kids out of bed before their endlessly growing bodies are ready...<br />
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So I try not to think about it. That's Future Simone's problem, right?<br />
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For now, I am making the most of the slow days, the minimal driving. Trying not to think about how much I'm going to be spending on petrol soon and how much I'm going to miss just being with my bubble buddies doing life at our own snail-like pace.<br />
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<b>Anyone else going to miss the slow pace of Lockdown Life?</b>Simoneyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09554122579485306611noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4940553413759896971.post-45377088660218741922020-03-31T18:44:00.000+13:002020-04-02T10:44:21.878+13:00Ideas for Fun at Home *lockdown edition*<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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Hello from the depths of coronavirus lockdown, here in Auckland New Zealand!<br />
I've been thinking of all of you with younger kids and heaving a bit of a sigh of relief that my kids are all so independant, screen-savvy and self-sufficient these days, which is allowing me to keep working my two jobs from home - mostly without too much interruption.<br />
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My lot are all giants now, aged 17, 15 and 11. See that little one in the photo above? Same height as me.<br />
They are so far happily connecting with their friends online via PS4 live gaming and HouseParty snapchatting, but eventually they must get bored of that, right?<br />
And there's only so many walks with the dog <strike>we</strike> they can take...<br />
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To help provide some ideas of stuff to do for fun while on Lockdown I've dug into the archives and rounded up some of my old "at home" holiday fun ideas. After all it is officially school hols here in NZ at the moment, and there's really nowhere else to be but home on Lockdown...<br />
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I have always been a big believer that there's lots of fun to be had at home...<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjFWAPPsw-tCyiR3V1zf9nnYnbfrufprWjezFXvdgx2mz2NPbSYMo2bBz4kqWArl0rxw-agZv__xrgmScZ3KgVF04X6FWeFthxSZtJIm17CfWGRjwOL0tdYjuZEPDl2CXb_GFu1NpvDv0xr/s1600/scavenger+hunt.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjFWAPPsw-tCyiR3V1zf9nnYnbfrufprWjezFXvdgx2mz2NPbSYMo2bBz4kqWArl0rxw-agZv__xrgmScZ3KgVF04X6FWeFthxSZtJIm17CfWGRjwOL0tdYjuZEPDl2CXb_GFu1NpvDv0xr/s1600/scavenger+hunt.jpg" /></a></div>
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<span style="font-size: x-large;">go on a photo scavenger hunt</span></h2>
Do your kids need fresh air but they're getting bored just walking round and round the block looking for teddy bears in windows? Try a <a href="http://www.greatfun4kidsblog.com/2010/05/photo-scavengers.html" target="_blank"><b>photo scavenger hunt</b></a>. All you need are a few photo-taking gadgets (a.k.a. phones, ipads) and a simple list.<br />
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Offer prizes for the best photo in each category, then go on a walk around the neighbourhood to see what you can find. You can adapt this idea to the ages of your kids - even tweens and teens might give this a go, and probably produce some pretty cool snaps...<br />
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<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiM0uQBeoBmVlJCCZ6w9eHl7-kyY6_rONIQlE3tLe980qmNP1ACGSxtMG6CdOrmqcVC7y-397XggdaxihEfCpEOxiAgPNtrsnua3R8rQv8e06ltB-18xx9xeeyyRM4prVhc_GTX2A2e3DCh/s1600/hut+watching+movie.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img alt="Indoor Forts for rainy day fun" border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiM0uQBeoBmVlJCCZ6w9eHl7-kyY6_rONIQlE3tLe980qmNP1ACGSxtMG6CdOrmqcVC7y-397XggdaxihEfCpEOxiAgPNtrsnua3R8rQv8e06ltB-18xx9xeeyyRM4prVhc_GTX2A2e3DCh/s1600/hut+watching+movie.JPG" title="Indoor Forts for rainy day fun" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Younger Years - TV watching from a fort on a rainy day</td></tr>
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<h2>
<span style="font-size: x-large;">camp inside on a rainy day</span></h2>
When the kids were younger they loved nothing better than to "camp" inside on a rainy day, watching movies and playing board games. It's pretty simple and fun to put up a dome tent in your lounge or make a fort out of chairs and blankets, then deck it out with pillows and rugs and play board games or card games like <i>Last Card</i> or <i>Go Fish</i>, which are good for almost any age.<br />
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You can also spread out a rug in front of the tent and have an indoor picnic lunch by the fire/heat pump.<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgnYEn1RGJ8iYSf6MeVVpsAQhO_Cshs73BNR7Y0lef0Wr7ZjoVySIUA8uUe-br0RiHZGVovXk05TkRFPeyOLGpzKlg2911XQGW_dHil4_3UFeNCnzQ3BrSHoprRLXsTzA4iSztcAqOZq4w/s1600/2012_0506backyardcamping0028.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="Backyard camping" border="0" data-original-height="450" data-original-width="600" height="480" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgnYEn1RGJ8iYSf6MeVVpsAQhO_Cshs73BNR7Y0lef0Wr7ZjoVySIUA8uUe-br0RiHZGVovXk05TkRFPeyOLGpzKlg2911XQGW_dHil4_3UFeNCnzQ3BrSHoprRLXsTzA4iSztcAqOZq4w/s640/2012_0506backyardcamping0028.JPG" title="Backyard camping" width="640" /></a></div>
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<h2>
<span style="font-size: x-large;">
camp out in your backyard (if you have one)</span></h2>
If you're lucky enough to still have a kiwi backyard, make the most of the fine autumn weather and do some <a href="http://www.greatfun4kidsblog.com/2012/05/under-canvas.html" target="_blank"><b>backyard camping</b></a>. Our own backyard can be a fine destination when a tent is involved. It's an adventure right at home, and there's nothing in the Lockdown rules to prevent it.<br />
We've done this a number of times and it was always great fun...<br />
<ul>
<li><a href="http://www.greatfun4kidsblog.com/2012/05/under-canvas.html" target="_blank"><b>Backyard camping story from back in the day</b></a></li>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjrWn3P-Zm9xIebvNmtZtGQ5wR3E2G18qj7-Xck6sEpT4TRnGRiX-ovqdORWX5hNAqvj_lOEVCJJM2abrlhXoOuJHwNGbaUX-2-MI_rbpC4QzZd6_phfwEyYTqX9s5TyY4zZwzj90Cojss/s1600/IMG_2064.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="Lazy family brunch with toaster waffles" border="0" data-original-height="1200" data-original-width="1600" height="480" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjrWn3P-Zm9xIebvNmtZtGQ5wR3E2G18qj7-Xck6sEpT4TRnGRiX-ovqdORWX5hNAqvj_lOEVCJJM2abrlhXoOuJHwNGbaUX-2-MI_rbpC4QzZd6_phfwEyYTqX9s5TyY4zZwzj90Cojss/s640/IMG_2064.JPG" title="Lazy family brunch with toaster waffles" width="640" /></a></div>
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<h2>
<span style="font-size: x-large;">have a lazy pajama day with family brunch</span></h2>
Next time there's a rainy day, declare a Pajama Day and stay in your PJ's all day. Toast frozen waffles or make pancakes for a relaxed family brunch. (You can make pancakes from scratch or use the easy shake-em-up bottled kind - next time you do that supermarket trek pick up a bottle, and some dairy whip).<br />
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If the kids are old enough, they can do the work of frying the pancakes, setting the table a bit fancy, and putting out the toppings. After enjoying brunch together, slob out and have a cosy <b><a href="http://www.greatfun4kidsblog.com/p/movie-nights.html" target="_blank">Movie Marathon</a> </b>while the rain falls down and the wind howls.<br />
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<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjcsPb8LQLX75VTuXNhjQpOQpkApUNibO8rQB7bZKKXoy94IjyHYi_6ex3rtkQN6pIovgHRIIBRibYL-13TwW4Ry6W8HV_VyOcarHbqAW8mZ4UXcKKUDl-uDAsdmzsSbE9xgTgpC3IKd_o/s1600/2012_0824familysleepover0012.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img alt="Family movie marathon sleepover" border="0" data-original-height="450" data-original-width="600" height="480" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjcsPb8LQLX75VTuXNhjQpOQpkApUNibO8rQB7bZKKXoy94IjyHYi_6ex3rtkQN6pIovgHRIIBRibYL-13TwW4Ry6W8HV_VyOcarHbqAW8mZ4UXcKKUDl-uDAsdmzsSbE9xgTgpC3IKd_o/s640/2012_0824familysleepover0012.JPG" title="Family movie marathon sleepover" width="640" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">family movie marathon sleepover back in 2012</td></tr>
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<h2>
<span style="font-size: x-large;">have a movie marathon family sleepover</span></h2>
You can't beat a <a href="http://www.greatfun4kidsblog.com/2012/11/birthday-movie-marathon-oldies-special.html" target="_blank"><b>movie marathon sleepover</b></a> – drag mattresses into the lounge, string up some Christmas lights and settle in to watch movies back-to-back. Check out my <a href="http://www.greatfun4kidsblog.com/p/movie-nights.html" target="_blank"><b>movie reviews page</b> </a>for kids and family movie recommendations.<br />
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Honestly, I reckon it's the dragging of mum's mattress onto the lounge room floor that really demonstrates our commitment and makes it a big deal. I did this once to celebrate my birthday and it was pretty magic I tell you.<br />
<ul>
<li><a href="http://www.greatfun4kidsblog.com/2012/11/birthday-movie-marathon-oldies-special.html" target="_blank"><b>My Movie Marathon Sleepover from back in the day</b></a></li>
</ul>
HINT: If you don't have Disney Plus yet, I highly recommend it for during the lockdown; there's a HUGE range of family movies and shows, including the latest Marvel collection and the old time classics. ($9.99/month with the first week free). #NotSponsored<br />
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<tr><td><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhzLsJMJZcdofqvuUTyu8onN3IexA0NDdoYVjB_GSq31B2DmZOiuhyphenhyphenHUU23E-w4AQiq4sy_ekAU-afgfMs_f0DyhkI6XQqoqwYJIa2VSqswP_e4DdqUY122oGaO6uU7E3Fn1xmFrVLfFjkI/s1600/make+a+movie.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img alt="Young Moviemakers" border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhzLsJMJZcdofqvuUTyu8onN3IexA0NDdoYVjB_GSq31B2DmZOiuhyphenhyphenHUU23E-w4AQiq4sy_ekAU-afgfMs_f0DyhkI6XQqoqwYJIa2VSqswP_e4DdqUY122oGaO6uU7E3Fn1xmFrVLfFjkI/s1600/make+a+movie.jpg" title="Young Moviemakers" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="font-size: 12.8px;">Young movie makers with clumsy old fashioned handi-cam, These days a phone is all you need...</td></tr>
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<h2>
<span style="font-size: x-large;">make a movie or a music video</span></h2>
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Getting the kids to come up with their own movie or make a music video lip-syncing to a favourite song will keep them occupied for a while.<br />
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Use a phone or ipad to film the masterpiece. Back in the day, Miss Fab and her pals made a couple of DIY epics on her camera without any assistance. If you have an ipad, the kids can use iMovie to edit their epic. If inspiration is lacking get them to do a version of a classic tale like Red Riding Hood or Goldilocks and the Three Bears.<br />
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<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjEvyT0J-GXVvdZCAlzfPENvo8SUQBh5-GGuA4Hfc1pYOUFYv-tVLBnRAmVX2_tTdtYEVvsaM8AuwWmtf9e5FuLG7tf62MWdZ_i6eq51yKLuJ9_FfHRAQirl0uEl0cms1SVM242-ZuBy80/s1600/FamilyCowboycookout04.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img alt="Our favourite theme dinner ever - backyard cookout" border="0" data-original-height="450" data-original-width="600" height="480" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjEvyT0J-GXVvdZCAlzfPENvo8SUQBh5-GGuA4Hfc1pYOUFYv-tVLBnRAmVX2_tTdtYEVvsaM8AuwWmtf9e5FuLG7tf62MWdZ_i6eq51yKLuJ9_FfHRAQirl0uEl0cms1SVM242-ZuBy80/s640/FamilyCowboycookout04.JPG" title="Our favourite theme dinner ever - backyard cookout" width="640" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">our best theme dinner/cookout ever</td></tr>
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<h2>
<span style="font-size: x-large;">have a theme dinner (or two)</span></h2>
Raid the cupboards and find stuff to have a dinner party on a Theme. Our favourites have included an <a href="http://greatfun4kids.blogspot.com/2008/10/raj-party-indian-theme-dinner.html">Indian Party</a> and a <a href="http://greatfun4kids.blogspot.com/2008/08/spanish-dinner-party_11.html">Spanish Party</a>; a <a href="http://greatfun4kids.blogspot.com/2010/06/fancy-shmancy-dinner.html">Fancy Dinner </a>, <a href="http://greatfun4kids.blogspot.com/2009/04/middle-eastern-dinner.html">Middle Eastern</a>, or <a href="http://www.greatfun4kidsblog.com/2011/05/chinese-theme-dinner-what-else.html" target="_blank">Chinese</a> ones. You can spend the day planning, raiding the cupboards for inspiration, decorating, researching ideas on the internet and getting things ready.<br />
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If you want to plan ahead, next time you're at the supermarket pick up a couple of bottles of .99c fizzy drink. Then add theming for a dinner with my free soda bottle printables on a heap of themes...<br />
<ul>
<li><a href="http://www.greatfun4kidsblog.com/p/printables.html" target="_blank"><b>Free Soda Bottle Printables for your theme dinner</b></a></li>
</ul>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEivKC3oxJ8RzSSGaJIhVLFaVhSHP7g5VRnDHwdkMPasmMJEMYS_-zxEePqP9PlVkCou-vSBQUjcS_3onQXAj5jf_D5hg3JiV0fdvr-8D4PEwxTXA9NHVhhl7Q1I25RT7w4QpS6hR6aAPPY/s1600/a+merry+heart0007.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="My star wars free printable soda bottle labels" border="0" data-original-height="563" data-original-width="750" height="480" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEivKC3oxJ8RzSSGaJIhVLFaVhSHP7g5VRnDHwdkMPasmMJEMYS_-zxEePqP9PlVkCou-vSBQUjcS_3onQXAj5jf_D5hg3JiV0fdvr-8D4PEwxTXA9NHVhhl7Q1I25RT7w4QpS6hR6aAPPY/s640/a+merry+heart0007.JPG" title="My star wars free printable soda bottle labels" width="640" /></a></div>
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Movie theme dinners are great fun where you can eat themed food and then watch the movie e.g. <a href="http://www.greatfun4kidsblog.com/2012/02/how-yoda-sodas-saved-day.html" target="_blank">Star Wars</a>, <a href="http://www.greatfun4kidsblog.com/2011/04/toy-story-party.html" target="_blank">Toy Story (Pizza Planet)</a>, Jungle Book, Lion King... the sky's the limit, really.<br />
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Here's a list of our Theme Dinners For inspiration:<br />
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<li><a href="http://greatfun4kids.blogspot.com/2010/06/fancy-shmancy-dinner.html" target="_blank"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><b>Fancy Shmancy Dinner</b></span></a></li>
<li><a href="http://greatfun4kids.blogspot.com/2008/10/raj-party-indian-theme-dinner.html" target="_blank"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><b>Raj Party (Indian Dinner)</b></span></a></li>
<li><a href="http://greatfun4kids.blogspot.com/2008/08/spanish-dinner-party_11.html" target="_blank"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><b>Spanish Dinner Party</b></span></a></li>
<li><a href="http://www.greatfun4kidsblog.com/2011/05/chinese-theme-dinner-what-else.html" target="_blank"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><b>Chinese Theme Dinner</b></span></a></li>
<li><a href="http://greatfun4kids.blogspot.com/2009/04/middle-eastern-dinner.html" target="_blank"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><b>Middle Eastern Dinner</b></span></a></li>
<li><a href="http://www.greatfun4kidsblog.com/2015/05/may-4th-be-with-you-last-minute-star.html" target="_blank"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><b>Star Wars Theme Dinner (May the 4th)</b></span></a></li>
<li><a href="http://www.greatfun4kidsblog.com/2012/04/dinnertime-in-30ad.html" target="_blank"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><b>Dinnertime in 30AD</b></span></a></li>
<li><span style="font-family: inherit;"><a href="http://www.greatfun4kidsblog.com/2012/04/first-class-titanic-theme-night.html" target="_blank"><b>First Class Titanic Theme Night</b></a></span></li>
<li><a href="http://www.greatfun4kidsblog.com/2013/05/bravemoviethemenight.html" target="_blank"><b>"Brave" Movie Theme Night</b></a></li>
<li><a href="http://www.greatfun4kidsblog.com/2013/08/family-fun-cowboy-cookout-with-truth-or.html" target="_blank"><b>Cowboy Cookout</b></a></li>
<li><b><a href="http://www.greatfun4kidsblog.com/2014/09/when-good-ideas-fall-flat-theme-nights.html" target="_blank">Kiwiana Theme Night</a></b></li>
</ul>
</div>
</div>
</div>
</div>
(I'm just now thinking how cool it would be to dress up 1980's style and watch a <i>Back to the Future </i>Marathon, while drinking Pepsi and eating microwave pizza...)<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj2FTZ3t1LYjOFmvrB5uvv5uRafdT_3j3gb-76ojmVwMA6NTg6JUooMoRMQNfrmYEZj2q_KwLMcJ4IQm_-ItmziEjtJXPw2R7e4oRRQp2Q_POPlTU269SFjwK5ru_hkZGPrFEdCDKUFHBs/s1600/a+merry+heart30011.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="Cook sausages for your dinner in a pan over the fire" border="0" data-original-height="563" data-original-width="750" height="480" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj2FTZ3t1LYjOFmvrB5uvv5uRafdT_3j3gb-76ojmVwMA6NTg6JUooMoRMQNfrmYEZj2q_KwLMcJ4IQm_-ItmziEjtJXPw2R7e4oRRQp2Q_POPlTU269SFjwK5ru_hkZGPrFEdCDKUFHBs/s640/a+merry+heart30011.JPG" title="Cook sausages for your dinner in a pan over the fire" width="640" /></a></div>
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<h2>
<span style="font-size: x-large;">have a cookout with campfire games</span></h2>
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We call these "<a href="http://www.greatfun4kidsblog.com/2015/07/nights-of-fire-and-marshmallows.html" target="_blank"><b>fire nights</b></a>" and they are our fave. We light a fire in our brazier (or our old tin bucket before that) and cook sausages in a pan over the fire. Then we toast marshmallows and play campfire games. Sometimes, we've themed it like our Cowboy cookout, but most often we just play circles and triangles / Truth or Dare.<br />
<ul>
<li><a href="http://www.greatfun4kidsblog.com/2015/07/nights-of-fire-and-marshmallows.html" target="_blank"><b>How to play Circles & Triangles</b></a></li>
<li><a href="http://www.greatfun4kidsblog.com/2013/08/family-fun-cowboy-cookout-with-truth-or.html" target="_blank"><b>Backyard Cookout with Truth or Dare printables</b></a></li>
</ul>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiVMQmXkfV6xjtRipFYGiG8D3q4gNI8JoiZJfBHrbvQhLJI5YJ5EwxaCVZSEaM674Px-m_DNEcgUVTO4Os7W5Mj0wyv-iu6UH3ty4B71hkVkGEMZEuGTRNLWWa7_nax8PQFYre2BL61l3o/s1600/2012_0116gardenparty0024.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="450" data-original-width="600" height="480" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiVMQmXkfV6xjtRipFYGiG8D3q4gNI8JoiZJfBHrbvQhLJI5YJ5EwxaCVZSEaM674Px-m_DNEcgUVTO4Os7W5Mj0wyv-iu6UH3ty4B71hkVkGEMZEuGTRNLWWa7_nax8PQFYre2BL61l3o/s640/2012_0116gardenparty0024.JPG" width="640" /></a></div>
<h2>
<span style="font-size: x-large;">throw a party for no reason</span></h2>
You don't need a reason to throw a party - any day we are alive and healthy is a good reason. So we are stuck in our bubble with the same people day after day - all the more reason to throw a party for no reason to liven things up.<br />
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Raid the cupboards and find or make food to hold an impromptu party, scones with jam and cream, muffins, plain bikkies with colourful icing, popcorn, cut-up fruit, icecream sodas... whatever you can find. Decorate with Christmas decorations, or <a href="http://www.greatfun4kidsblog.com/2012/01/impromptu-garden-party.html" target="_blank"><b>spread a tablecloth on a box under a tree </b></a>(I still keep a box of bunting handy just in case).<br />
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You can paint each other's faces or do "makeovers"<u>; </u>dress up silly or on a theme; put on YouTube and have lip sync battles; find a good beat on Spotify and have a rap-battle... any excuse for a good laugh and some silly dancing.
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...........................<br />
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So there's a few ideas to help you survive the rest of the school holidays in lockdown without going too stir crazy.<br />
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<span style="font-size: large; text-align: center;">Stay Safe out there, people!</span><br />
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Simoneyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09554122579485306611noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4940553413759896971.post-89962655800763245732019-11-25T14:37:00.000+13:002020-03-15T18:10:34.636+13:00After 17 Years as a Mum Here's What I've Learned<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhqLbiLRFJdfhGmfC7bGaE29_S6ebtZ0uyPAOPlnCPDQKhUOHdyJtSG-uWf2CDv3Mru85_M9hagIDpbz5NANXhzdTGWN7f68kSCwYajYoq1p5DAufyU9SSHajkdI5K5HeYv9hxUn70O-VM/s1600/1_CodjDAt6vFrepyL9W_9UfQ.jpeg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img alt="" border="0" data-original-height="1079" data-original-width="1600" height="430" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhqLbiLRFJdfhGmfC7bGaE29_S6ebtZ0uyPAOPlnCPDQKhUOHdyJtSG-uWf2CDv3Mru85_M9hagIDpbz5NANXhzdTGWN7f68kSCwYajYoq1p5DAufyU9SSHajkdI5K5HeYv9hxUn70O-VM/s640/1_CodjDAt6vFrepyL9W_9UfQ.jpeg" title="Parenting is a Rollercoaster" width="640" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">[<a href="https://timeline.com/photos-roller-coaster-history-7ee0a8a5244c" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">Image Credit</a>]</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
My eldest boy turned 17 the other day, which is crazy because it feels like only yesterday that I began blogging when he was five.<br />
Oh my word, what a journey we've had, what a rollercoaster ride. With one short year of schooling left, my 6-foot-tall manchild is almost ready to take on the world. I'm caught between shock and awe - <i>shock</i> at how fast it's all gone and <i>awe</i> that we have made it this far.<br />
<br />
Let me share some of the things I've learned - the hard way of course - in the last few years of parenting. I hope to shed some light and sprinkle some hope for those of you just entering the teenage years, to encourage you that if we can survive, anyone can...<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgWnSc2SzKYjBClvEgXR84k_JYjvX2c0mEXmie7-PQv-92IUGNSZcA6JLk2hEtyI2ESvnyr9HyQexp8tJ9Qvai1SVUonj5Kfijopr9S-48pJz3lS08TKNqb9aFrOilAbMvHL7SUVY1tM90/s1600/75513506_10158168166926495_7148916344853889024_n.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="On my birthday my kids organised a "care package" for me" border="0" data-original-height="720" data-original-width="960" height="480" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgWnSc2SzKYjBClvEgXR84k_JYjvX2c0mEXmie7-PQv-92IUGNSZcA6JLk2hEtyI2ESvnyr9HyQexp8tJ9Qvai1SVUonj5Kfijopr9S-48pJz3lS08TKNqb9aFrOilAbMvHL7SUVY1tM90/s640/75513506_10158168166926495_7148916344853889024_n.jpg" title="On my birthday my kids organised a "care package" for me" width="640" /></a><br />
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<h3>
#1. It's all about the relationship</h3>
The number one thing I have figured out is this: focus on building the relationship, not changing the behaviour. Let's be honest - there are loads of things my kids do that I don't particularly like - attitudes, habits, choices. When I tried to fight the behaviour by coming up with various clever carrot-and-stick schemes all I got was a battle of wills. When your kids are taller and stronger than you, you've got to be canny to get cooperation. I've tried taking things away and offering incentives to get the behaviour I wanted but was endlessly frustrated and going in circles. Until I stopped focusing on the negative behaviour and started focusing on re-building the relationship between us.<br />
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As a parent of teens, I couldn't rest on my laurels as the nice kind mum that they loved as littlies. I have had to realise that they are their own people, with their own preferences and ideas, and begin to forge a relationship based on mutual respect and cooperation, not coercion or threat of punishment.<br />
All the big issues have had to be faced and worked through - sex, drugs, alcohol, mental health - you name it.<br />
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I have had to stop focusing on the stuff I was upset about and look deeper, see beneath the sucky attitude to the beloved person lurking within. I have had to get good at finding the glimmers of gold, spotting the small kindnesses, the little acts of generosity or responsibility and making a big deal about that stuff, letting them know that I noticed and appreciated their efforts.<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhbo08T2UEAzYjRLFqoTGgC2tf8df1xO1wqzYZf-UO3sQ3dpzvl6eGrc1UrjTyMhT6mj3hmK1Q9aiNv6beu3Pa8b4l9e4rvDLakCPRNX4pv7A65PX6h2IwGV3A5q-9x8bZr1kJ3frkRA5U/s1600/IMG_1833.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="We have a learner driver in the family now..." border="0" data-original-height="1200" data-original-width="1600" height="480" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhbo08T2UEAzYjRLFqoTGgC2tf8df1xO1wqzYZf-UO3sQ3dpzvl6eGrc1UrjTyMhT6mj3hmK1Q9aiNv6beu3Pa8b4l9e4rvDLakCPRNX4pv7A65PX6h2IwGV3A5q-9x8bZr1kJ3frkRA5U/s640/IMG_1833.JPG" title="We have a learner driver in the family now..." width="640" /></a></div>
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Sometimes, those nuggets lay hidden deep - we have to use our x-ray "parent vision" to spy them out.<br />
I try to let my kids know I love and support them by telling <i>and </i>showing. I spend hours driving them places (or now, letting my boy practice driving <i>me </i>places). I try to say 'yes' as often as I can, so when I say 'no' it means something. I listen to their opinions and try to understand their perspective. I show them that they matter to me and that I value who they are, as their own person.<br />
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Even though I'm still a completely imperfect mum, the funny thing is that as I've stopped trying to be a Policemother (which I sucked at) and instead worked on building our connection, I've found that mutual trust and respect have grown and the attitudes and behaviour have improved as a natural flow-on effect. I can whole-heartedly say, that when it comes to parenting teens, the key is building the relationship.<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhaXsZj6-mm1dCDScdG-lZsXi2rXNua7AmdrPLvjLrtdTcnJMKeXcr_MaqQ3MLImUe-1i8vN1tZjeVwAav8oNwIxm8JKWKLPfPgbvo3A9MuzGx5d_IkL3RBoAnkTLcYz7YXpMLYfV_xTww/s1600/67068079_349647649295251_2147916327300366336_n.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="Me and "my boys" - love these guys" border="0" data-original-height="480" data-original-width="640" height="480" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhaXsZj6-mm1dCDScdG-lZsXi2rXNua7AmdrPLvjLrtdTcnJMKeXcr_MaqQ3MLImUe-1i8vN1tZjeVwAav8oNwIxm8JKWKLPfPgbvo3A9MuzGx5d_IkL3RBoAnkTLcYz7YXpMLYfV_xTww/s640/67068079_349647649295251_2147916327300366336_n.jpg" title="Me and "my boys" - love these guys" width="640" /></a></div>
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<h3>
#2. Believe in them relentlessly</h3>
Back in the Nineties when I was doing youth work, <a href="http://www.greatfun4kidsblog.com/2010/05/my-side-of-story.html" target="_blank">I worked with teenagers deemed 'at risk'</a>, who came from backgrounds as tough as you can imagine (think 'Once Were Warriors'). There were plenty of people who had written these kids off (schools, police, social workers) but they captured my heart and broke it into pieces. I didn't know how to help them, there wasn't any quick fix or simple answer I could find to help turn their lives around. All I could do was be there when they needed me, show up, and simply keep believing in them. I didn't know what else to do, so that's what I did.<br />
Just this year, I've reconnected with a few of them and been blown away by the lives they are now living, the beautiful healthy families they have. And the message they gave me was this: <i>Thank you for never giving up on me. Thank you for believing in me.</i><br />
I can't tell you what it meant to me to hear that.<br />
<br />
In the middle of one crisis with my eldest, a friend of mine who is a Parenting Coach told me, <b>"Every kid needs one person who believes in them - for your son you are that person"</b>.<br />
That's my job - to be that person. There have been some pretty devastating and difficult challenges I've had to face as a mum on my own, with a teenage son battling his own demons. But somehow we seem to have come through the worst of it. I can see the light at the end of tunnel, and meeting up with some of my old youth group guys and girls has strengthened my resolve and given me renewed hope for my own kids.<br />
If those teenagers who were "at risk" can turn out amazing, so can mine. I just have to keep believing in them and showing up for them like I did in my youth work days.<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgNC9dukPXGDfJ1gaRYXr2aUIVIH7_Rd-rlPpYummMFFAlAywNM1nrXQN9n-4S1-Tw9cV55eNnj_QJ94ZdkVihzmsgZErBBz2w2rUL0YSt2O_U0t9SXeBXKMokPv1aZtUNCSaiz4GTaSqQ/s1600/dash+and+fab.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="Ahhh the good old days when it was just potty training and sleeping habits" border="0" data-original-height="720" data-original-width="960" height="480" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgNC9dukPXGDfJ1gaRYXr2aUIVIH7_Rd-rlPpYummMFFAlAywNM1nrXQN9n-4S1-Tw9cV55eNnj_QJ94ZdkVihzmsgZErBBz2w2rUL0YSt2O_U0t9SXeBXKMokPv1aZtUNCSaiz4GTaSqQ/s640/dash+and+fab.jpg" title="Ahhh the good old days when it was just potty training and sleeping habits" width="640" /></a></div>
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My daughter (now 15) does this thing where she tests me, to see what it would take for me to "disown" her.<br />
"What if I got pregnant...got arrested...killed someone...? Would you disown me then?"<br />
I keep telling her, "nothing you could do would ever make me disown you. It might break my heart, but I would be there for you no matter what..."<br />
It's a game we play, but I mean it with my whole heart. I'm a mum, after all. These babies grew inside me. I couldn't turn away from them without ripping my own heart out.<br />
In the end that's what they need. For us to relentlessly believe in them, show up for them, and love them even when they are being unlovable.<br />
It will pay off in the end, I have now seen living proof.<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgqSVqgJD71xUoiP-LU7P6FWz6fd31OB2mFeXRWQpNZQidXo8puJ7MYa-y7PyuU841y_IT70oTAWXBB4cVIWProViPeKc0XAM9fnvOQODYkyghq5DUTzVS3RDGa3fLg25JUZZoGrTb_GvM/s1600/at+deco+with+nan+and+grandad+2.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="My three precious ones and my folks" border="0" data-original-height="720" data-original-width="960" height="480" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgqSVqgJD71xUoiP-LU7P6FWz6fd31OB2mFeXRWQpNZQidXo8puJ7MYa-y7PyuU841y_IT70oTAWXBB4cVIWProViPeKc0XAM9fnvOQODYkyghq5DUTzVS3RDGa3fLg25JUZZoGrTb_GvM/s640/at+deco+with+nan+and+grandad+2.jpg" title="My three precious ones and my folks" width="640" /></a></div>
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<h3>
#3. The Learning Curve is Endless So Take the Small Wins</h3>
Just when you think you've finally gotten to grips with one stage of parenting, you hit a new stage with a whole new set of challenges.<br />
And just when you've gotten one kid's crises sorted and think, "Ahhh I can relax now..." up pops another one with a fun new problem to deal with.<br />
It seems like there's always somebody struggling with something, always some new parenting challenge.<br />
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The challenges of parenting human children are endless. Little people with their own thoughts, ideas, emotions, strengths, weaknesses, frustrations and fears trying to navigate a very confusing world, as their bodies grow and change and sometimes betray them, as friends grow and change and sometimes betray them... as they meet with success, failure, rejection, injury and even trauma. Helping these precious ones find their way in the world is surely the biggest and most important task any of us will ever face. It's rather daunting because the stakes are so high and the challenges are never-ending.<br />
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There are very few moments where we can sit back and 'survey the kingdom' with a feeling of satisfaction that all is right with the world. There's always <i>something </i>cropping up to throw a spanner in the works.<br />
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That is parenting life... just one long endless learning curve. A giant game of whack-a-mole where there is always some new challenge popping up.<br />
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I have had to learn to be OK with this. I spent way too many years trying hard to get to the place where I'd 'arrived' at being on top of things, as a parent.<br />
I wanted to know that all my kids were happy and healthy and doing OK, that I knew what I was doing and had routines sorted and discipline strategies nailed instead of feeling like I was continually flying by the seat of my pants and parenting from the back foot... I just wanted one moment to feel like I had parenting sussed out - but that moment has never arrived and probably never will.<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjt5857De8pPkVEwmwc43dGWosTShLunGEcWXgn1D9Im2q79Hhzvj_Z6AkFdmEppyeRy8EdS7f5PsCe6PZo8hvaxNf0o9hSE8CGgMO-i3Nu_k8GHDo8GJEmP8Gj1Rd6zGNA3DyKtb7lobI/s1600/this+one.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em; text-align: center;"><img alt="Take the small wins - like fun with the cuzzies" border="0" data-original-height="1200" data-original-width="1600" height="480" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjt5857De8pPkVEwmwc43dGWosTShLunGEcWXgn1D9Im2q79Hhzvj_Z6AkFdmEppyeRy8EdS7f5PsCe6PZo8hvaxNf0o9hSE8CGgMO-i3Nu_k8GHDo8GJEmP8Gj1Rd6zGNA3DyKtb7lobI/s640/this+one.JPG" title="Take the small wins - like fun with the cuzzies" width="640" /></a><br />
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To survive this long endless learning curve called Parenting we need to take the long view<b>.</b> We are in this for the long haul, we've planted the seeds and nurtured the seedlings; we just need to be patient and allow time for what we've put in to bear fruit. Hang in there for long enough and we'll see - they will all turn out OK. (Just give it 20 years.)<br />
<i>We also need to recognise the small wins, </i>in order to keep our sanity and combat the sheer mental exhaustion and anxiety we endure as parents.<br />
Because the small wins are reassuring signs that the bigger wins are coming eventually. When I say "small wins" I'm talking about noticing little things like, <i>he emptied the dishwasher without being asked. </i><i>He asked my permission to go out when he could have easily just told me he was going. </i><br />
Little things like that are actually a big deal. My son is over 6 foot and I can't make him <u>do</u> anything or <u>not</u> do anything. I've had to work on building a relationship of mutual respect. The fact that he asks my permission or spontaneously helps out occasionally are marker stones telling me we are on the right road. Our relationship is healthy.<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjISY7LlbVJoH3uddjvE13F9ErDJmqbvz7RvDh027oAUd0UhegOpPWC7WwBt3TTloQB6dUUW8rHat2f-powwMMfryZTjWSvwbwbBZ30XFN4tdZJ0kym__VdXAh7K2hsuMJnXTDJH4TTv88/s1600/71639456_10162191826040577_7226100184223055872_n.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em; text-align: center;"><img alt="Taking the small wins" border="0" data-original-height="750" data-original-width="750" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjISY7LlbVJoH3uddjvE13F9ErDJmqbvz7RvDh027oAUd0UhegOpPWC7WwBt3TTloQB6dUUW8rHat2f-powwMMfryZTjWSvwbwbBZ30XFN4tdZJ0kym__VdXAh7K2hsuMJnXTDJH4TTv88/s400/71639456_10162191826040577_7226100184223055872_n.jpg" title="Taking the small wins" width="400" /></a></div>
<br />
I'm on the lookout for the little clues that let me know my children are becoming kind and decent human beings. I'll take encouragement wherever I can find it to reassure myself that my life messages are getting through (mostly on the theme of "be kind"). Any small act of kindness or thoughtfulness, anytime they take responsibility for themselves or sincerely apologise for something - I take heart at their increasing maturity. The littlest clue is a positive sign - I take it as a win and cheer inwardly.<br />
<br />
And sometimes, <i>very occasionally, </i>when we least expect it, we get to enjoy a truly warm fuzzy moment...<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhLIHDQTg8lLmewTnjlbVXrh88ZH-e5UTuqko9EFt1YH3sZnw7CSkcb6Zix8s5pVXVZoJuACAYdw57vZCnXhoru_GsLMldzMnf3cKJcFKaxmuOIVVzEwobQWjY4jd0yWS_y6kMeR7Lf4IY/s1600/76706809_10158168166366495_2808408746110222336_n.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="480" data-original-width="640" height="480" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhLIHDQTg8lLmewTnjlbVXrh88ZH-e5UTuqko9EFt1YH3sZnw7CSkcb6Zix8s5pVXVZoJuACAYdw57vZCnXhoru_GsLMldzMnf3cKJcFKaxmuOIVVzEwobQWjY4jd0yWS_y6kMeR7Lf4IY/s640/76706809_10158168166366495_2808408746110222336_n.jpg" width="640" /></a></div>
<br />
Picture the scene - it's your 50th birthday. A handful of close friends have joined you for drinks and dessert on the back deck of your new home. There are speeches and then - oh be still my heart - your 15-year-old daughter stands up and makes a speech too, unprompted...<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjVuTRe6WmTGQk8DoyAdjWADGCihOAUNkQJy-QcRwddW1s5EGohFpc_F25VUzpgMRjmsrAwMoHvglA3Icp1YED7TfUAYJjduCgNdDUe6o9rOYB7AkY4tWHcEmJLgcMnX3cOTfdv_1w-6vc/s1600/76959808_10158168166071495_4115546338584690688_n.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="824" data-original-width="960" height="342" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjVuTRe6WmTGQk8DoyAdjWADGCihOAUNkQJy-QcRwddW1s5EGohFpc_F25VUzpgMRjmsrAwMoHvglA3Icp1YED7TfUAYJjduCgNdDUe6o9rOYB7AkY4tWHcEmJLgcMnX3cOTfdv_1w-6vc/s400/76959808_10158168166071495_4115546338584690688_n.jpg" width="400" /></a></div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjYXPOinfBk0MpArQRvZdR_Yi5dRoaw3iaKvXg3awycH6IZ3jjTnGBQuYssgsRwA6sOCcvl815JKhA4hmbq-gw9d0j5ax-WrMpBKjN1ew-J75exz6Mqjx4i3vdrhkr1qnl2641_jpvdkKA/s1600/75328556_10158168166236495_3364744325341642752_n.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="It's all about Relationship" border="0" data-original-height="730" data-original-width="686" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjYXPOinfBk0MpArQRvZdR_Yi5dRoaw3iaKvXg3awycH6IZ3jjTnGBQuYssgsRwA6sOCcvl815JKhA4hmbq-gw9d0j5ax-WrMpBKjN1ew-J75exz6Mqjx4i3vdrhkr1qnl2641_jpvdkKA/s320/75328556_10158168166236495_3364744325341642752_n.jpg" title="It's all about Relationship" width="300" /></a><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgUhuOrlP3pHFgrLsfo37t3ZVRNPS7eJZFdThfzHfs3nuGNHEyBYC41kJsdGHyx34wxBbt4faQB3EE-21OA1NnDCVnvitRRh6v4rzWf5UFvJTkOB8OSEbv0A7ZoEFRjBstKibet9cb9SBU/s1600/74627115_10158168166286495_2977967865908428800_n.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="My girl speechifying" border="0" data-original-height="640" data-original-width="480" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgUhuOrlP3pHFgrLsfo37t3ZVRNPS7eJZFdThfzHfs3nuGNHEyBYC41kJsdGHyx34wxBbt4faQB3EE-21OA1NnDCVnvitRRh6v4rzWf5UFvJTkOB8OSEbv0A7ZoEFRjBstKibet9cb9SBU/s320/74627115_10158168166286495_2977967865908428800_n.jpg" title="My girl speechifying" width="240" /></a></div>
<br />
She references the banter you share back and forth, and says, <i>we are like best friends</i>...<br />
Right then, the joy is unspeakable and it has all been worth it.<br />
Your 11 year old follows up with his own precious words; the tallest one stands at the back and listens. Later he tells you, "I didn't make a speech cos I don't like talking in front of people..." but if he did he says he'd say, "You are loving and caring."<br />
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<div style="text-align: center;">
What more could a 50-year-old mum ask for?</div>
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<span style="background-color: white; color: #222222; font-family: "arial" , sans-serif; font-size: 16px; text-align: left;">🖤</span></div>
Simoneyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09554122579485306611noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4940553413759896971.post-8320663245015920022019-04-22T14:27:00.003+12:002021-03-09T02:57:22.775+13:00From the Ashes<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh2ltTgoSU1QjcmI64V4v1i-8abiR0gELJKrT_9d0Jlv9Gl1oikNO7DrcF71er6CgKougjAEkl93VEOf77quQyCcI3mlcWjY6DtHSjVua5YWZz-MX013ajQCMCLkZx7sgCOy3viOkZI0Ro/s1600/IMG_1021.JPG" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-width="800" height="480" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh2ltTgoSU1QjcmI64V4v1i-8abiR0gELJKrT_9d0Jlv9Gl1oikNO7DrcF71er6CgKougjAEkl93VEOf77quQyCcI3mlcWjY6DtHSjVua5YWZz-MX013ajQCMCLkZx7sgCOy3viOkZI0Ro/s640/IMG_1021.JPG" width="640" /></a></div>
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<br />
It has been nearly three years since <a href="http://www.greatfun4kidsblog.com/2016/09/twists-turns-on-rollercoaster.html" target="_blank">I left my marriage</a>. It
was the most difficult decision I have ever made, and one with the highest cost
I’ve ever had to pay. It was ‘Hobson’s Choice’ you might say – the choice you
have when there is really no other choice. When my marriage ended it wasn’t
from lack of trying – we’d <a href="http://www.greatfun4kidsblog.com/2012/05/i-went-to-see-man-about-dog.html" target="_blank">been in counselling since 2012</a>, after all. But when
all avenues have been tried and the pain being caused to all parties is greater
than the benefit of staying, well, at some point you have to call ‘time’.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
No-one walks away from a marriage lightly. No-one launches a
grenade into their family on a whim; but still, I had no idea at the time just
exactly what the price would be for that decision, though all things considered
it was still the only decision that could have been made. <br />
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
With the decision to walk away came Death of the Dream. </div>
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<br />
Everything I had hoped for my family, the dream I had for my
kids’ childhood, the ideals I had tried to live by, all the ways I believed a
good Christian family should be – Dead.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br />
It was like a fire ripped through my life and left me
surrounded by smouldering ashes and I’ve been trying to salvage what I can ever
since.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
It was like our family had been smashed into pieces and I’ve
been trying to pick those pieces up and form them back into some semblance of a
whole, but they are jagged and splintered and all I have in my hands are the
shattered bits of what once was.<br />
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<div class="MsoNormal" style="background: white; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
A counsellor told me that the
grief which accompanies divorce is called “disenfranchised grief” – the kind
that is hidden and unnoticed by most people - not the kind where people turn up
with flowers.<o:p></o:p></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="background: white; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
At times the grief has been completely
debilitating. There are some days I stand in the ashes of my family and feel
completely overwhelmed, helpless and hopeless because sole parenting is hard.
Parenting teenagers is hard. (Sole parenting three kids with ADHD who are
mostly teenagers – well, you can imagine.)<o:p></o:p></div>
</div>
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<br />
Some days I count my losses. Too many friendships I thought
would stick but didn’t; the loss of my church community of 27 years (it became so awkward
and painful I had to leave); the grief over the loss of these things was
devastating. When you go through the fire it burns up everything that can be
consumed, but when you come out the other side what you are left with is Gold.
I may not have many friendships left, but the ones that stuck with me through
the fire are priceless. </div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br />
Lost in the fire was also the sense I once had of being on a
Sure Path. I used to have a sense of Destiny, of there being a Greater Purpose
and a Hand that was guiding me. But the inevitable questions shook my certainty
– if I was following God’s Plan how did I end up here? </div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
I don’t know if there is an answer to that question, so I
have to put it to one side and come back to what I <u>can</u> know.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br />
Maybe I’ve let too many “extras” be added on to my faith. Ideas
about “what should be” that have no foundation in the actual Gospel but are
add-on ideas from our culture. The Prosperity Doctrine (giving to get back as
if God were a slot machine); ticking boxes and following Rules and you’ll be
‘blessed’; “Family Values” as the highest goal of Christianity – all add-ons.
None of it actually what Jesus himself said. </div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Did I think that by following Jesus it would mean I’d have a
trouble-free life? He never promised that. He said, “In this world you will have trouble,
but take heart because I have overcome the world.”</div>
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<br />
So what can I count on? If my life has burnt down to its
foundations, what are those foundations? What can I stand on? What can I
rebuild on that is sure?</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
I know that in the middle of the fire He never left me. I
know that I lacked courage and strength but He supplied me with enough to do
what I needed to do. I know that I lacked resources but He provided for me and
my children. </div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
I know that I was afraid, so very afraid, and somehow He got
me through the darkest night of my life. I know that I am tired, exhausted,
depleted, and overwhelmed most days but every day I somehow get through.<br />
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<br /></div>
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<div class="MsoNormal" style="background: white; margin-bottom: 0cm;">
Some days what I need to do is
stop counting my losses and count my blessings instead: I have a handful of
precious friends who stuck with me through the fire; I still have my kids, I
still have my faith. Though much has changed I have new blessings - new job, new
home, the dog. There are still many blessings in my life and much to be
thankful for.<o:p></o:p></div>
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<br /></div>
My dream of a picture-perfect nuclear family may be dead but we can still rescue the broken bits that are left and rebuild them into something new. It might not be The Dream, but it’s something. Some things help glue us together...</div>
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<b style="text-indent: -18pt;"><br /></b>
<b style="text-indent: -18pt;">Having a dog.</b><span style="text-indent: -18pt;"> Yep, <a href="http://www.greatfun4kidsblog.com/2016/11/what-kids-learn-from-having-dog.html" target="_blank">getting that goofy dog</a> was the best decision I made. The kids may squabble and disagree on most
things but they agree 100% on how much they love Clyde. Clyde is Glue.</span></div>
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<b style="text-indent: -18pt;"><br /></b></div>
<b>Being around family. </b>One thing I realised at Christmas was that we feel more like a family when we are around our wider family. When we hang out with our cousins, it’s like, “oh there we are! We ARE still a family.”</div>
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<b> Fire Nights. </b>We have not been able to have fire nights in our new house and we have missed them sooooo much. I didn’t realise just how much sitting around the fire toasting marshmallows and playing games helped us feel like ‘us’. We are moving house again at the end of June* and one of the things the kids are most looking forward to is being able to have Fire Nights again.</div>
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<br /><b>Dinner together. </b>One of the things I have struggled with is cooking dinners for my ungrateful unappreciative hoards. So I got into the habit of not trying, dishing up the same tired fare week after week; not bothering to lay the table, just letting everyone disappear off to their room with a plate. Bad idea. About a month ago in a fit of desperation and amid growing complaints from the inmates, I signed up for one of those food boxes and it revolutionised our dinnertime. It takes the mental load off meal planning and bonus – we are eating at the table together again and it is like Glue<span style="text-indent: -18pt;">.</span></div>
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Something I have to learn to do is
to let go of the ‘shoulds’.<o:p></o:p></div>
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When I compare what I manage to achieve as a single
mum with how well I think I ‘should’ be doing the sense of failure is crippling
and I lose all sense of hope.<br />
But if I let go of the ‘shoulds’ (and being worried what people might think of
how well I'm doing) then I find that the load is not too heavy, the task is not
too daunting and maybe I am not unequal to the task of parenting these children
after all.<br />
<br />
I have to hold onto hope - hope gets me through. Hope that things will get
better, that this will get easier, that my kids will come through this and be
OK.<o:p></o:p></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="background: white; margin-bottom: 12pt;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjGoIEQytG-MPFOhUgtW6FJM5sbaz-__NLOGvZ0K6Bn_hHF2pwlEnMtGa_io3JfoyTKtM8oSjnPbj_DxKFD0paCH78EboGWIgdkWOtFEuMjIcy_KwDFKSy-b1qnCYBllABWpwYFr_h1uys/s1600/IMG_1056.JPG" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em; text-align: center;"><img border="0" data-original-height="694" data-original-width="720" height="308" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjGoIEQytG-MPFOhUgtW6FJM5sbaz-__NLOGvZ0K6Bn_hHF2pwlEnMtGa_io3JfoyTKtM8oSjnPbj_DxKFD0paCH78EboGWIgdkWOtFEuMjIcy_KwDFKSy-b1qnCYBllABWpwYFr_h1uys/s320/IMG_1056.JPG" width="320" /></a></div>
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I have to let go of the picture I
had, that Dream Picture of my family - it is no longer helpful.<o:p></o:p></div>
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I have to find a new picture for
us, a new Dream that fits our reality. This, I'm still working on. <o:p></o:p></div>
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One thing I do believe and which helps give me hope - the promise that <i>God makes beauty out of ashes. </i><br />
(Ashes make good fertiliser for new growth, apparently.)<br />
So this is me, taking it one day at a time, living in hope.<br />
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To finish, I’d like to share with you an excerpt from an <a href="https://johnpavlovitz.com/2019/02/21/everyone-around-you-is-grieving-go-easy/?fbclid=IwAR0C4xHqrMe7gUcYB5Ddh9jfFdiaPZiwJupoky6lDbcDIWW0SJiuei3vkWo">article
by John Pavlovitz</a>:</div>
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<i><span face=""calibri" , "sans-serif"" style="font-size: 10pt; line-height: 115%;"><br /></span>
<span face=""calibri" , "sans-serif"" style="line-height: 115%;">“</span><span class="blast"><span face=""calibri" , "sans-serif"" style="border: 1pt none; color: #444444; line-height: 115%; padding: 0cm;">Everywhere people are grieving and worried and fearful, and
yet none of them wear the signs, none of them have labels, and none of them
come with written warnings reading, I’M STRUGGLING.</span></span><span class="apple-converted-space"><span face=""calibri" , "sans-serif"" style="border: 1pt none; color: #444444; line-height: 115%; padding: 0cm;"> </span></span><span class="blast"><span face=""calibri" , "sans-serif"" style="border: 1pt none; color: #444444; line-height: 115%; padding: 0cm;">BE NICE TO ME.</span></span></i></div>
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<span class="blast"><i><span face=""calibri" , "sans-serif"" style="border: 1pt none; color: #444444; line-height: 115%; padding: 0cm;">And since they</span></i></span><span class="apple-converted-space"><i><span face=""calibri" , "sans-serif"" style="border: 1pt none; color: #444444; line-height: 115%; padding: 0cm;"> </span></i></span><span class="blast"><i><span face=""calibri" , "sans-serif"" style="border: 1pt none; color: #444444; line-height: 115%; padding: 0cm;">don’t</span></i></span><span class="blast"><i><span face=""calibri" , "sans-serif"" style="border: 1pt none; color: #444444; line-height: 115%; padding: 0cm;">, it’s up to you and me to look more closely and
more deeply at everyone around us: at work or at the gas station or in the
produce section, and to never assume they aren’t all just hanging by a thread.</span></i></span><span class="apple-converted-space"><i><span face=""calibri" , "sans-serif"" style="border: 1pt none; color: #444444; line-height: 115%; padding: 0cm;"> </span></i></span><span class="blast"><i><span face=""calibri" , "sans-serif"" style="border: 1pt none; color: #444444; line-height: 115%; padding: 0cm;">Because most people</span></i></span><span class="apple-converted-space"><i><span face=""calibri" , "sans-serif"" style="border: 1pt none; color: #444444; line-height: 115%; padding: 0cm;"> </span></i></span><span class="blast"><i><span face=""calibri" , "sans-serif"" style="border: 1pt none; color: #444444; line-height: 115%; padding: 0cm;">are</span></i></span><span class="apple-converted-space"><i><span face=""calibri" , "sans-serif"" style="border: 1pt none; color: #444444; line-height: 115%; padding: 0cm;"> </span></i></span><span class="blast"><i><span face=""calibri" , "sans-serif"" style="border: 1pt none; color: #444444; line-height: 115%; padding: 0cm;">hanging by a thread—and our simple kindness can be
that thread.</span></i></span><i><span face=""calibri" , "sans-serif"" style="color: #444444; line-height: 115%;"><o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
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<span class="blast"><i><span face=""calibri" , "sans-serif"" style="border: 1pt none; color: #444444; line-height: 115%; padding: 0cm;">We need to remind ourselves just how hard the
hidden stories around us might be, and to approach each person as a delicate,
breakable, invaluable treasure—and to handle them with care.</span></i></span><em><span face=""calibri" , "sans-serif"" style="border: 1pt none; color: #444444; line-height: 115%; padding: 0cm;"> </span></em><i><span face=""calibri" , "sans-serif"" style="color: #444444; line-height: 115%;"><o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
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<span class="blast"><i><span face=""calibri" , "sans-serif"" style="border: 1pt none; color: #444444; line-height: 115%; padding: 0cm;">As you make your way through the world today, people
won’t be wearing signs to announce their mourning or to alert you to the
attrition or to broadcast how terrified they are—but if you look with the right
eyes, you’ll</span></i></span><span class="apple-converted-space"><i><span face=""calibri" , "sans-serif"" style="border: 1pt none; color: #444444; line-height: 115%; padding: 0cm;"> </span></i></span><span class="blast"><i><span face=""calibri" , "sans-serif"" style="border: 1pt none; color: #444444; line-height: 115%; padding: 0cm;">see</span></i></span><span class="apple-converted-space"><i><span face=""calibri" , "sans-serif"" style="border: 1pt none; color: #444444; line-height: 115%; padding: 0cm;"> </span></i></span><span class="blast"><i><span face=""calibri" , "sans-serif"" style="border: 1pt none; color: #444444; line-height: 115%; padding: 0cm;">the signs.</span></i></span><i><span face=""calibri" , "sans-serif"" style="color: #444444; line-height: 115%;"><o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
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<span class="blast"><i><span face=""calibri" , "sans-serif"" style="border: 1pt none; color: #444444; line-height: 115%; padding: 0cm;">There are grieving people all around you.</span></i></span><i><span face=""calibri" , "sans-serif"" style="color: #444444; line-height: 115%;"><o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
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<span class="blast"><i><span face=""calibri" , "sans-serif"" style="border: 1pt none; color: #444444; line-height: 115%; padding: 0cm;">Go easy.”</span></i></span><i><span face=""calibri" , "sans-serif"" style="color: #444444; line-height: 115%;"><o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
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<span style="font-family: "courier new" , "courier" , monospace;">*We moved into our brand new house with the pool in the
pocket community back in January 2018; about 11 months later I had to admit
that it wasn’t working for us for many reasons and decided to sell and re-buy a
stand-alone family home with room to kick a ball and have Fire Nights. The kids
said our brand new home “still felt like a hotel, not a home”; our new house-to-
be is a 1940’s Art Deco cottage and they all reckon “this feels like home”. </span><span style="font-family: "courier new" , "courier" , monospace;">(Here's a few pics of the house we're moving to) </span><span style="font-family: "courier new" , "courier" , monospace;">We
move on June 29. </span></div>
Simoneyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09554122579485306611noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4940553413759896971.post-74162204412562200382018-08-22T11:33:00.013+12:002023-12-04T14:41:23.845+13:00My Journey in Te Ao Maori<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjDIfJO5105VzfRe7TVUPrxu8PL6PD9xp6tvd-vaqSPP5lbDYCotKshI6Mxy39EumroYRAFSu4yI-Lg6SygXIDMTmtAvSjYBGOl1IGNR2P7YDWEOZ-eY2sPwD2W45UwNbQmKMQh5gPeEZc/s1600/ParentingPlace_Staff-8888.jpg" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img alt="Kei te Haerenga ahau (I am journeying)" border="0" data-original-height="1067" data-original-width="1600" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjDIfJO5105VzfRe7TVUPrxu8PL6PD9xp6tvd-vaqSPP5lbDYCotKshI6Mxy39EumroYRAFSu4yI-Lg6SygXIDMTmtAvSjYBGOl1IGNR2P7YDWEOZ-eY2sPwD2W45UwNbQmKMQh5gPeEZc/s1600/ParentingPlace_Staff-8888.jpg" title="Kei te Haerenga ahau (I am journeying)" width="750" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Photo Credit: <a href="http://stephaniesoh.com/" target="_blank">Stephanie Soh</a></td></tr>
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<span style="font-family: "courier new" , "courier" , monospace;">*(kei te haere tonu ahau)*</span><br />
<br />
In 2016 I began working at the <a href="https://www.theparentingplace.com/" target="_blank">Parenting Place</a>, which had been a long-held dream of mine, after<a href="https://www.theparentingplace.com/contributor/simonegraham/" target="_blank"> writing freelance for the magazine</a> for years.<br />
Unbeknown to me, my new workplace had begun a journey (<i>haerenga</i>) into <i>te ao M</i><span face=""Google Sans", arial, sans-serif" style="background-color: white; color: #4d5156; font-size: 16px;"><i>ā</i></span><i>ori</i> (the M<span face=""Google Sans", arial, sans-serif" style="background-color: white; color: #4d5156; font-size: 16px;">ā</span>ori world) and I was swept up in it along with my workmates.<br />
This was no tokenism or surface-level nod, but a wholehearted journey delving into who we are as a nation, our history, where we've come from and what it means to be good Treaty partners.<br />
Along the way, I had the privilege of staying on a number of <i>marae </i>around the country, including <i>Te Tii Marae </i>at Waitangi (where our nation's founding treaty was debated before the signing) and <i>Parihaka </i>(the site of a terrible injustice perpetrated by the British in the 1880's).<div><br />
The journey began for me as just simply something my work was doing, which I found interesting, but it has become something personal for me now - a personal odyssey and a challenge to discover who I am and where I belong.<div><br />
In 2018 I had the privilege of beginning to learn <i>te reo M</i><span face=""Google Sans", arial, sans-serif" style="background-color: white; color: #4d5156; font-size: 16px;"><i>ā</i></span><i>ori </i>with a bunch of my workmates, during work time. I was worried my middle-aged half-speed brain would not cope with the challenge of learning a language, but I did OK, passing all my tests and actually learning stuff. But the main thing I've discovered is that learning <i>te reo </i>isn't just about learning to speak the words - it is about opening myself up to a whole new way of thinking, new ways of looking at the world and finding a deeper sense of belonging and identity in this <i>whenua </i>(land).<br />I completed a questionnaire sent out to all of us at work to "gauge the bi-cultural journey the Parenting Place has embarked on over the last three years..."<br />
<br />
Here are some of my responses...<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgyFo8aXI7ryD68947tBA1F3vxZw6BaVCltWuzADnVc0mLIJNgb0VTDYc1vDCo1AAouDUZVD3zm6UbyDOTrKHxiM9uWqmy-DpeLzvj_weFYp4UdzL25eXvoxvUrBLU3TX8shQyl5flH6vo/s1600/ParentingPlace_Staff-7582.jpg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="Parenting Place whanau arrive at Parihaka - me in the stripey skirt" border="0" data-original-height="1067" data-original-width="1600" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgyFo8aXI7ryD68947tBA1F3vxZw6BaVCltWuzADnVc0mLIJNgb0VTDYc1vDCo1AAouDUZVD3zm6UbyDOTrKHxiM9uWqmy-DpeLzvj_weFYp4UdzL25eXvoxvUrBLU3TX8shQyl5flH6vo/s1600/ParentingPlace_Staff-7582.jpg" title="Parenting Place whanau arrive at Parihaka - me in the stripey skirt" width="750" /></a></div>
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<b>Describe your initial feelings about starting this journey into te ao Māori. At the same time, could you tell me about your existing knowledge of te ao Māori before the Parenting Place's bi-cultural journey began?</b><br />My initial feelings were positive; I was ready for this due to a number of experiences that had laid a foundation for me. I have a strong sense of social justice and since I was a teenager I'd had a lingering sense of cultural guilt when I came across stories about New Zealand's history. I learned a little <i>reo</i> in school - just the basics of counting, a couple of phrases, a few songs, a <i>marae </i>visit. I've always had an interest in language and history and would try to figure out the meaning of place names based on the small number of words I knew.<br />
In 2015 <a href="http://www.greatfun4kidsblog.com/2015/02/the-best-little-country-in-world-is-my.html" target="_blank">I hosted some English relatives </a>and as I drove them around the North Island I told them what I knew about the places' history and M<span face=""Google Sans", arial, sans-serif" style="background-color: white; color: #4d5156; font-size: 16px;">ā</span>ori names, but after realising how limited that was, I voiced for the first time that I'd love to learn <i>te </i><i>reo</i>, and more of New Zealand's history. At that point, it was just a vague wish for "one day"...<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgvlZpTphq2ygcbS3VQOG5Nwy6MjnV3yqjS2KOeW9tyEH8xOLu8NSihLNdIHXqCh2OR0dtM1gJeqbY8-q1HAJTxmIz_s7Fk2vGqJ5_rhTJVzSYdilUpdFICwx94cs6bO0s5xPJg9Myrfdw/s1600/ParentingPlace_Staff-8634.jpg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="Journey to Parihaka - Mt Taranaki" border="0" data-original-height="1067" data-original-width="1600" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgvlZpTphq2ygcbS3VQOG5Nwy6MjnV3yqjS2KOeW9tyEH8xOLu8NSihLNdIHXqCh2OR0dtM1gJeqbY8-q1HAJTxmIz_s7Fk2vGqJ5_rhTJVzSYdilUpdFICwx94cs6bO0s5xPJg9Myrfdw/s1600/ParentingPlace_Staff-8634.jpg" title="Journey to Parihaka - Mt Taranaki" width="750" /></a></div>
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<b>Looking back, did you have any preconceived thoughts/apprehensions? Please explain.</b><br />
One experience stood out for me as negative; a <i>powhiri </i>was conducted when I left my role as the <a href="http://greatfun4kids.blogspot.com/2010/05/my-side-of-story.html" target="_blank">coordinator and founder of CLS (Creative Learning Scheme) alternative education programme</a>. Nobody explained the process to me, just that they wanted me to get up and talk. I stood up at the wrong time and <a href="http://www.greatfun4kidsblog.com/2013/02/camp-mother-faces-her-fear.html" target="_blank">got growled at by an old </a><i><a href="http://www.greatfun4kidsblog.com/2013/02/camp-mother-faces-her-fear.html" target="_blank">kuia</a> </i>in front of the whole room to "sit down girl!" That was extremely upsetting and humiliating especially since that was my send-off after pouring blood sweat and tears into the programme to see it established, and to be called "girl" and told to sit down was... extremely painful. When I actually had to speak I couldn't get the words out, but ended up fleeing the podium and crying outside. </div><div><br /></div><div>This made me have a very fearful negative reaction towards anything M<span face=""Google Sans", arial, sans-serif" style="background-color: white; color: #4d5156; font-size: 16px;">ā</span>ori for a number of years, until about 13 years later when I had to <a href="http://www.greatfun4kidsblog.com/2013/02/camp-mother-faces-her-fear.html" target="_blank">face my fear and attend my daughter's school camp</a> at Manurewa Marae. I felt ill with nerves, but the people at that marae were so gracious and welcoming, it completely undid the earlier negative experience and I found myself with a completely transformed attitude after that. The positive experience at Manurewa Marae helped re-lay a positive foundation and re-establish an openness in my heart towards <i>te ao M</i><span face=""Google Sans", arial, sans-serif" style="background-color: white; color: #4d5156; font-size: 16px;"><i>ā</i></span><i>ori</i>. If I had not had this positive experience prior to working here, I imagine I would have felt initially apprehensive and anxious about the <i>haerenga </i>Parenting Place is on, and my place in it.<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgxrutqmF5DyVwsEJazByBeRpLEsUt5SPQuWEphD9brfJoYoHWnv2zYodAD9l3XRuTd5slYZfRcdv4GxlweAmgfOT5_TFNbvNM3dFf1aXWNuxn3412Ii5uSeh4HtUzpnn1NCtLi6sDvmLs/s1600/37148967_10156800950291495_6454522464981483520_n.jpg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="Walking up the hill where the cannons once were, overlooking Parihaka" border="0" data-original-height="720" data-original-width="960" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgxrutqmF5DyVwsEJazByBeRpLEsUt5SPQuWEphD9brfJoYoHWnv2zYodAD9l3XRuTd5slYZfRcdv4GxlweAmgfOT5_TFNbvNM3dFf1aXWNuxn3412Ii5uSeh4HtUzpnn1NCtLi6sDvmLs/s1600/37148967_10156800950291495_6454522464981483520_n.jpg" title="Walking up the hill where the cannons once were, overlooking Parihaka" width="750" /></a></div>
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<b>What was a turning point for you or first "ah ha" moment on this journey? </b><br />
There have been many subtle shifts, but the first big "aha" moment when the whole journey became my own, not just something I was along for the ride on, was at <a href="https://www.instagram.com/p/BlRCggpBdIc/?taken-by=greatfun.etc" target="_blank">Parihaka</a>, when Te Akau said, <i>"You will truly be my Treaty partner when you can walk as confidently in my world as I have to walk in yours." </i><br />
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That sums it all up for me. At that moment I found my "why" and it made sense of everything. </div><div><br /></div><div>The Treaty began to come alive for me over the last few years, beginning with binge-watching <a href="https://www.nzonscreen.com/title/lost-in-translation-the-beginnings" target="_blank">Mike King's documentary one Waitangi Day</a>, a year before I came to work here. </div><div><br /></div><div>Then I had the priviliege of proof-reading <a href="https://www.huiacomehome.co.nz/book/" target="_blank">Jay Ruka's book "<i>Huia Come Home</i>"</a>. I had goosebumps all the way through, seeing how God had woven himself into the story of Aotearoa and seeing how the Treaty was a God-breathed idea, with a dream of justice and rightness for this land and two peoples in partnership. Sure it all went pretty horribly wrong, but STILL - it began in hope. </div><div><br /></div><div>It was also mindblowing when we stayed at <i>Te Tii Marae</i>, and witnessed the humility and grace with which the people there care for our history and the hope they still hold for true partnership and reconciliation.</div><div><br /></div><div>I feel like more of a New Zealander for being on this journey. I feel more deeply rooted into this land myself as I have come to know more of our stories. I wish all New Zealanders could go on this journey.</div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjtDUVJuyAY7ts918lEsDM27GFM96EvaqslKk9An6f38adxFwPCo0rSfCLlJET9apQ5BUcfb7goyGvsjAC_bkoCI5CteR0VbufqN3jdJS7YFgpQrZW1TgkdKmA9guYPkW4ifdOYzRcp2vU/s1600/ParentingPlace_Staff-7892.jpg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="Te Akau teaches us to make rope from harakeke (flax)" border="0" data-original-height="1067" data-original-width="1600" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjtDUVJuyAY7ts918lEsDM27GFM96EvaqslKk9An6f38adxFwPCo0rSfCLlJET9apQ5BUcfb7goyGvsjAC_bkoCI5CteR0VbufqN3jdJS7YFgpQrZW1TgkdKmA9guYPkW4ifdOYzRcp2vU/s1600/ParentingPlace_Staff-7892.jpg" title="Te Akau teaches us to make rope from harakeke (flax)" width="750" /></a></div>
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<b>What thinking or mindset have you had to adjust, thus far, into the haerenga? </b><br />
The guilt. I have felt a lingering sense of white guilt since my teenage years living in Taranaki. But since listening to the stories from our M<span face=""Google Sans", arial, sans-serif" style="background-color: white; color: #4d5156; font-size: 16px;">ā</span>ori hosts at <i>marae</i>, and experiencing the graciousness, the welcome, the warmth in those places from those people, I have been blown away by the <i>manaakitanga</i> and have had to let my guilt go and embrace this journey as a learner. I no longer feel the need to justify myself or feel bad about my heritage, I just need to have an open heart and learn.<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhRn4WaDd99Z9wqJ9DNZ4F5xtJQu2Djpem4eMprfKG2QjlBI_g6N8R84ZsFxAMRUWIqjh2ouojFtQXJMq5fmXYB_164E-p19mDIOMIz7o5mHmiamHxi_1Fneg1nF_No15groEuYPDPGTdA/s1600/ParentingPlace_Staff-7947.jpg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="Whaea Maata teaches us to make "poi karakia o Parihaka" (white prayer poi, specially made and blessed at Parihaka)" border="0" data-original-height="1067" data-original-width="1600" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhRn4WaDd99Z9wqJ9DNZ4F5xtJQu2Djpem4eMprfKG2QjlBI_g6N8R84ZsFxAMRUWIqjh2ouojFtQXJMq5fmXYB_164E-p19mDIOMIz7o5mHmiamHxi_1Fneg1nF_No15groEuYPDPGTdA/s1600/ParentingPlace_Staff-7947.jpg" title="Whaea Maata teaches us to make "poi karakia o Parihaka" (white prayer poi, specially made and blessed at Parihaka)" width="750" /></a></div>
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<b>What, if anything, has surprised you along the way?<o:p></o:p></b></div>The <i>manaakitanga </i>of M<span face=""Google Sans", arial, sans-serif" style="background-color: white; color: #4d5156; font-size: 16px;">ā</span>oridom, which I realise has been there all along. the graciousness and warmth that awaits all <i>manuhiri </i>(visitors) on <i>marae </i>all over New Zealand. The richness of honour and value for <i>wh</i><span face=""Google Sans", arial, sans-serif" style="background-color: white; color: #4d5156; font-size: 16px;"><i>ā</i></span><i>nau</i> and <i>tamariki</i> at the heart of <i>te ao M<span face=""Google Sans", arial, sans-serif" style="background-color: white; color: #4d5156; font-size: 16px;">ā</span>ori </i>which is at odds with the horrifying negative statistics. So much was lost through the colonising of New Zealand, not just the land and the language. When M<span face=""Google Sans", arial, sans-serif" style="background-color: white; color: #4d5156; font-size: 16px;">ā</span>ori lost touch with their land, marae, <i>iwi</i>, roots and culture, they lost so much, and it's still a deep wound. It's heartbreaking, but this journey makes me hopeful for New Zealand.<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEibmgnpkgLvZNinsKwa27yGTm935GfE0eBjGgeDfy77JkAtycojXi-vb-S4wQLpTe2GoOYBD36XNToEoQtlH5dc4Xw2PGWwJHO4GaUzMZbB6mmBhV4IVtMGDAZj9OAPPmKyQhJ42-tJyyQ/s1600/ParentingPlace_Staff-8848.jpg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="Parihaka" border="0" data-original-height="1067" data-original-width="1600" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEibmgnpkgLvZNinsKwa27yGTm935GfE0eBjGgeDfy77JkAtycojXi-vb-S4wQLpTe2GoOYBD36XNToEoQtlH5dc4Xw2PGWwJHO4GaUzMZbB6mmBhV4IVtMGDAZj9OAPPmKyQhJ42-tJyyQ/s1600/ParentingPlace_Staff-8848.jpg" title="Parihaka" width="750" /></a></div>
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<b><br /></b> <b>How has learning about te ao Māori impacted your faith?</b><br />
I love that <i>te ao M</i><span face=""Google Sans", arial, sans-serif" style="background-color: white; color: #4d5156; font-size: 16px;"><i>ā</i></span><i>ori</i> is a spiritually connected/integrated world. Everything is spiritual and has spiritual meaning, and spirituality is a given. I vastly prefer this natural spirituality, where everyday things are made sacred, to the compartmentalised materialistic western version of Christianity. I'm at a crossroads in my faith journey at the same time, and this <i>haerenga </i>has been very heartening, helping me see God's bigger plan for New Zealand as a weaving together over our entire history.</div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhiZSAnOKESzxAP9Omlx10KPDW8n1nqTUS97JCjZwcVXLzoPVG1wEzD6tZeppRUl38VVcevX-4XCwHz7eC8pNKR2FDxKIdIFiVHXD0EFn_U0D-0Ny3uCYzING6qC9lWsbLC1S2VcjzUhzE/s1600/37130377_10156800950106495_5462621015173496832_n.jpg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="Te Akau tells as the story of Parihaka, as we stand on the spot where cannons once stood" border="0" data-original-height="720" data-original-width="960" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhiZSAnOKESzxAP9Omlx10KPDW8n1nqTUS97JCjZwcVXLzoPVG1wEzD6tZeppRUl38VVcevX-4XCwHz7eC8pNKR2FDxKIdIFiVHXD0EFn_U0D-0Ny3uCYzING6qC9lWsbLC1S2VcjzUhzE/s1600/37130377_10156800950106495_5462621015173496832_n.jpg" title="Te Akau tells as the story of Parihaka, as we stand on the spot where cannons once stood" width="750" /></a></div>
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<b>How have you navigated this journey with your whānau and friends outside of Parenting Place? </b><br />
I have had a number of really interesting conversations with friends and family members about our haerenga here at Parenting Place. <br />
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I bought the book, <a href="https://www.huiacomehome.co.nz/book/" target="_blank">Huia Come Home </a>for my dad and have recommended it to a number of friends. I've talked at length with my dad about our own family history, our tipuna/ancestor (my great great great grandfather Peter Grace - same name as my dad) who came to New Zealand in 1841.</div><div><br /></div>
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Peter Grace was an Irish Catholic runaway who worked his passage to New Zealand on board the ship <i>Sophia Pate</i>. It's a fascinating story; Peter's son John married Charlotte Speedy, a daughter of Major and Sarah Speedy. They had strong ties to Waikato iwi, living near Whaingaroa (Raglan) and Mt Pirongia. Years later their son Raymond, my dad's grandfather took my father on a trip to Kawhia and surprised him by speaking fluent Reo to local people asking them to show him where "his" <i>waka </i>had landed. Raymond identified strongly with the <i>Tainui </i>waka and considered himself a member of the iwi. Ray's mother Charlotte had reportedly been "adopted" into the tribe after she nursed the M<span face=""Google Sans", arial, sans-serif" style="background-color: white; color: #4d5156; font-size: 16px;">ā</span>ori princess (among others) back to health after an epidemic. I'm still trying to substantiate the stories but these have been handed down through the family for years, and are our family legends.</div><div><br /></div>
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It has been exciting and inspiring to hear these stories about my ancestors who came here and how they spoke te reo M<span face=""Google Sans", arial, sans-serif" style="background-color: white; color: #4d5156; font-size: 16px;">ā</span>ori fluently and closely engaged with the local iwi where they lived. Even though I may not have any M<span face=""Google Sans", arial, sans-serif" style="background-color: white; color: #4d5156; font-size: 16px;">ā</span>ori ancestry myself, I know my Irish ancestors were endeavouring to be good neighbours to M<span face=""Google Sans", arial, sans-serif" style="background-color: white; color: #4d5156; font-size: 16px;">ā</span>ori, which is a heritage I can feel proud of.</div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi9TOLQtjy_em6fMyVaH9tqbgk1hvrAqcBS-5OLQAFC6mGGTpXhswaZsqesWVAX_2cpThj0k6FEWRn3QAnRMycUsQD8lc36BjDErKNtfil5jYo86G-9hI7rGVylfuvzAIMRMVsWdUxhqp8/s1600/ParentingPlace_Staff-9020.jpg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="My amazing work whanau - Te Whare O Parenting Place" border="0" data-original-height="1067" data-original-width="1600" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi9TOLQtjy_em6fMyVaH9tqbgk1hvrAqcBS-5OLQAFC6mGGTpXhswaZsqesWVAX_2cpThj0k6FEWRn3QAnRMycUsQD8lc36BjDErKNtfil5jYo86G-9hI7rGVylfuvzAIMRMVsWdUxhqp8/s1600/ParentingPlace_Staff-9020.jpg" title="My amazing work whanau - Te Whare O Parenting Place" width="750" /></a></div>
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<b>What are some positives that have come out of engaging with te ao Māori? </b><br />I feel more rooted in this land, more deeply connected to this place, as a result of learning my <i>whakapapa</i> and about my own ancestors. I have come to see myself not as an isolated person standing on my own, but as part of a line of <i>tīpuna</i>, standing on their shoulders. This has been very healing for me as I navigate single parenthood and separation, to find a new connectedness in my heritage. This is a result of insight into the mindset in <i>te ao M</i><span face=""Google Sans", arial, sans-serif" style="background-color: white; color: #4d5156; font-size: 16px;"><i>ā</i></span><i>ori</i>, that we are not valuable for <i>what we do</i> but for <i>who we are</i> - that there are more ways of having value than monetary ones, an idea which is incredibly rich and appealing to me.<br />
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I have value because of my inherent <i>mana </i>as a person and I stand here with my <i>tīpuna </i>behind me and the land under me. I belong. I am connected. This is a powerful thought.</div>
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<span style="font-family: "courier new" , "courier" , monospace;">Photo credits - All photos taken by my amazing workmate <a href="http://stephaniesoh.com/" target="_blank">Steph Soh</a> during our Parihaka haerenga last month.</span></div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiZPd1wj9wUeujP43koBJBJqS7TLfDH0vBpONAJm8RfAJmugXpjf7kRQzZ3uToaOQ5msA7986u3IpM9I4k0T_ct8G-4M9vd1W2tteFldITJzL42ZWqQOEpnt0k5FDAv9vO6C_L7Rb-Moh8/s1600/37274720_10156802898021495_404334191249981440_n.jpg" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="Parihaka Settlement as it once was" border="0" data-original-height="619" data-original-width="619" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiZPd1wj9wUeujP43koBJBJqS7TLfDH0vBpONAJm8RfAJmugXpjf7kRQzZ3uToaOQ5msA7986u3IpM9I4k0T_ct8G-4M9vd1W2tteFldITJzL42ZWqQOEpnt0k5FDAv9vO6C_L7Rb-Moh8/s320/37274720_10156802898021495_404334191249981440_n.jpg" title="Parihaka Settlement as it once was" width="320" /></a></div>
<span style="font-family: "courier new" , "courier" , monospace;"><span style="font-family: "courier new" , "courier" , monospace;">ABOUT PARIHAKA: </span><span style="background-color: white; font-size: 14px;">On November 5th 1881 soldiers hauled cannons up to the top of the hill overlooking the peaceful Settlement of Parihaka and aimed them down at the village. Those cannons were never fired. The people of Parihaka sat all day without eating or drinking, in front of the cannons, singing and chanting. When the soldiers came they were greeted by wahine (women) and tamariki (children) who fed them with bread. The soldiers responded by destroying the settlement, burning the crops, killing the livestock, raping the women and tearing down the whares (houses). 153 Parihaka men were arrested and taken prisoner, without trial, to perform hard labour in the South Island, building prisons and roads all the way down to Dunedin.</span><span style="background-color: white; font-size: 14px;"> </span></span></div>
<span style="background-color: white; font-family: "courier new" , "courier" , monospace; font-size: 14px;">All but 26 acres of land was confiscated, the residents of Parihaka, (many of whom had come to take refuge there after other similar land losses in their home settlements), were evicted, leaving only a handful of women and children to care for the land and try to rebuild. Wahine Toa!</span><br />
<span style="background-color: white; font-family: "courier new" , "courier" , monospace; font-size: 14px;">19 years later the last of the Parihaka men finally returned to the papakainga. But Parihaka, which had been a thriving community and home to over 2000 people founded on the principles of non-violence and peace, was never able to rebuild back to what it once was. The losses were too great. </span><br />
<span style="background-color: white; font-family: "courier new" , "courier" , monospace; font-size: 14px;">The government, on behalf of the Crown, apologised formally last year for the many wrongs done. to Parihaka. So far it's only words and the grief and loss still lingers (how could it not?).</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "courier new" , "courier" , monospace;"><span style="background-color: white; font-size: 14px;">Yet the spirit that lingers in Parihaka is one of grace and hope for reconciliation. It is an inspiring and humbling space. </span><a href="https://www.instagram.com/explore/tags/parihaka/" style="background-color: white; border: 0px; color: #003569; font-family: -apple-system, BlinkMacSystemFont, "Segoe UI", Roboto, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: inherit; font-variant-east-asian: inherit; font-variant-numeric: inherit; line-height: inherit; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; text-decoration-line: none; vertical-align: baseline;">#parihaka</a><span style="background-color: white; font-size: 14px;"></span><a href="https://www.instagram.com/explore/tags/nzhistory/" style="background-color: white; border: 0px; color: #003569; font-family: -apple-system, BlinkMacSystemFont, "Segoe UI", Roboto, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: inherit; font-variant-east-asian: inherit; font-variant-numeric: inherit; line-height: inherit; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; text-decoration-line: none; vertical-align: baseline;">#nzhistory</a><span style="background-color: white; font-size: 14px;"> </span><a href="https://www.instagram.com/explore/tags/taranaki/" style="background-color: white; border: 0px; color: #003569; font-family: -apple-system, BlinkMacSystemFont, "Segoe UI", Roboto, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: inherit; font-variant-east-asian: inherit; font-variant-numeric: inherit; line-height: inherit; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; text-decoration-line: none; vertical-align: baseline;">#taranaki</a><span style="background-color: white; font-size: 14px;"> </span><a href="https://www.instagram.com/explore/tags/didyouknow/" style="background-color: white; border: 0px; color: #003569; font-family: -apple-system, BlinkMacSystemFont, "Segoe UI", Roboto, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; font-stretch: inherit; font-variant-east-asian: inherit; font-variant-numeric: inherit; line-height: inherit; margin: 0px; padding: 0px; text-decoration-line: none; vertical-align: baseline;">#didyouknow</a><span style="background-color: white; font-size: 14px;">?</span></span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-family: "courier new" , "courier" , monospace;"><br /></span> <span style="font-family: "courier new" , "courier" , monospace;">RECOMMENDED LINKS:</span><br />
<br />
<ul>
<li><a href="https://www.nzonscreen.com/title/lost-in-translation-the-beginnings" target="_blank">Mike King's documentary on the Treaty of Waitangi</a></li>
<li><a href="https://www.huiacomehome.co.nz/book/" target="_blank">Jay Ruka's book on the history of the gospel in NZ "Huia Come Home"</a></li>
</ul>
</div></div>Simoneyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09554122579485306611noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4940553413759896971.post-71626819618346201642017-12-29T12:01:00.002+13:002018-04-23T11:45:13.162+12:00Big New Things<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhy1doCspdd8Ix35g0vy4MAeVqT5fxUNzmex5Rubyv918_9teoUHtTtvqDW1fhYniqhS5vP0Ixxg8-WKWryKhztJ2ZQC727dv9WnOx8fkLnJFlfMZm_yl3meWjLqVFiLXH4ZS22xORXTT8/s1600/Christmas+20170006.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="Pizza picnic at Pt Chev Beach" border="0" data-original-height="563" data-original-width="750" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhy1doCspdd8Ix35g0vy4MAeVqT5fxUNzmex5Rubyv918_9teoUHtTtvqDW1fhYniqhS5vP0Ixxg8-WKWryKhztJ2ZQC727dv9WnOx8fkLnJFlfMZm_yl3meWjLqVFiLXH4ZS22xORXTT8/s1600/Christmas+20170006.JPG" title="Pizza picnic at Pt Chev Beach" /></a></div>
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Hello again, at long last. It's been a while, but big things are afoot - HUGE things, even.<br />
It's been so long between blog posts - I'm not going to lie, blogging has been at the bottom of the list of priorities lately. Life is a whirlwind, a relentless nerve-wracking rollercoaster and this is the last ever blog post I will write sitting at the computer in the hallway of this, my dear old house.<br />
I'm sitting here typing this on a whim when I really should be packing boxes because...<br />
WE ARE MOVING.<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi9SJ_ViDmqcfDxvaeFKDZv-bSRAg9NQqVzX5T1Yzdca4tPvuE0sgyM_jelYs7NyKBY6_1pi8AZYr5gC3I3NZTW8eJxJxJLgTd7ZhiC65MBAYuChVC-wNyV_k-G-FhmhqUhagPbem0ppfQ/s1600/Christmas+20170026.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="Christmas Table setting by Miss fab" border="0" data-original-height="563" data-original-width="750" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi9SJ_ViDmqcfDxvaeFKDZv-bSRAg9NQqVzX5T1Yzdca4tPvuE0sgyM_jelYs7NyKBY6_1pi8AZYr5gC3I3NZTW8eJxJxJLgTd7ZhiC65MBAYuChVC-wNyV_k-G-FhmhqUhagPbem0ppfQ/s1600/Christmas+20170026.JPG" title="Christmas Table setting by Miss fab" /></a></div>
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After 11 memorable years here, it is time for a fresh start.<br />
I love this house so much. SO MUCH.<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj5eVqRZatQX_595cquJ8cYcezUsLaqF08smGpEBEiGcLYeMk4IfSbqoz4_3YVyoPNE-nyC6Ee15EXaTvQDPOuG_cNEdUM383zVFAQorUAhhIw1wnF9QWNU5xNOI5fmYP64zkHXaf44AwA/s1600/Christmas+20170020.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="Christmas table decor added by Miss fab on Christmas Eve, bless her" border="0" data-original-height="563" data-original-width="750" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj5eVqRZatQX_595cquJ8cYcezUsLaqF08smGpEBEiGcLYeMk4IfSbqoz4_3YVyoPNE-nyC6Ee15EXaTvQDPOuG_cNEdUM383zVFAQorUAhhIw1wnF9QWNU5xNOI5fmYP64zkHXaf44AwA/s1600/Christmas+20170020.JPG" title="Christmas table decor added by Miss fab on Christmas Eve, bless her" /></a></div>
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But it's a lot to manage. It's old, and high maintenance and I am but one person with a bad back and two broken toes. And most importantly me and the kids need a fresh start, a blank slate.<br />
It's kinda hard to move on with a new chapter of your life when you're surrounded by the ghosts of the old one.<br />
So we've found a new home and we're moving there on January 8th.<br />
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It's very very different to where we live now.<br />
Instead of hundred-year-old charm and character, we have brand new and shiny.<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhOKUXPULgc8hSfGTHZTye62J-SafA6V9KehEhwoB5Sj0LoO48mB8um5yfrNU3If0TKiD8548e-XIZV3XU0eruBpCZq4VgS3BgI7GWdXwftO2VSoihZn9_fYhJGEW60j0A_PBgSNbbtAkc/s1600/our+house+2.PNG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="Our new house is the end one in a row of three, built around a pool" border="0" data-original-height="636" data-original-width="957" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhOKUXPULgc8hSfGTHZTye62J-SafA6V9KehEhwoB5Sj0LoO48mB8um5yfrNU3If0TKiD8548e-XIZV3XU0eruBpCZq4VgS3BgI7GWdXwftO2VSoihZn9_fYhJGEW60j0A_PBgSNbbtAkc/s1600/our+house+2.PNG" title="Our new house is the end one in a row of three, built around a pool" width="750" /></a></div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhibG1TAGc61pcwnY9RfgAxRHDQ5Zr4w0p0_6esP7nllrHKK8XEhfsT1uOsFPKP01Pf_kObb_KTYKs587An0mbcVckrNYyCJwR9VpUU0YfpToqv-hmmeG9pwoowQTJGmRSppqBECNJOk04/s1600/our+house+3.PNG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="There are seven homes in the development; the property runs down to the creek and bush - there is loads of communal outdoor space" border="0" data-original-height="640" data-original-width="960" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhibG1TAGc61pcwnY9RfgAxRHDQ5Zr4w0p0_6esP7nllrHKK8XEhfsT1uOsFPKP01Pf_kObb_KTYKs587An0mbcVckrNYyCJwR9VpUU0YfpToqv-hmmeG9pwoowQTJGmRSppqBECNJOk04/s1600/our+house+3.PNG" title="There are seven homes in the development; the property runs down to the creek and bush - there is loads of communal outdoor space" width="750" /></a></div>
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Our new house is part of a pocket community, a small private development just a stone's throw from where we live now, on the other side of the creek, just over the border of the next (slightly cheaper) suburb. The big kids will be able to stay in the school they're already enrolled in (Miss Fab starts high school in the new year!) and we'll be able to maintain the valuable relationships we have with our amazing friends in Mt Albert.<br />
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This move is huge (the kids were so young when we moved into our house, they don't remember living anywhere else). It's exciting (but bloddy stressful too).<br />
But at the end of all this, in just mere days, we will be living in our brand new home. With A POOL! (a pool I don't have to maintain because it is shared by the pocket community).<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhpeeK3jn2qy01GzXIDKWOu3EeDTt32UkQsCtVZLeyG4AWV1FXpXL5ipdaUyqENTn4-YerkyP6H-siQk-8_6ZUkJBuWPokhfX-1O6taJ3dgkg_QCJlFjTXaGsGI0e7kTQcSgZ0UdrDJ-gw/s1600/IMG_0196.PNG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="The pool. Need I say more?" border="0" data-original-height="634" data-original-width="954" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhpeeK3jn2qy01GzXIDKWOu3EeDTt32UkQsCtVZLeyG4AWV1FXpXL5ipdaUyqENTn4-YerkyP6H-siQk-8_6ZUkJBuWPokhfX-1O6taJ3dgkg_QCJlFjTXaGsGI0e7kTQcSgZ0UdrDJ-gw/s1600/IMG_0196.PNG" title="The pool. Need I say more?" width="750" /></a></div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgIpr-1gaPWw9nD4Q2n2lsKxXtNtD_d5uP8cTZ433LFXMppKT6G7R5vpOND4Jzwf-3PKDb0S8o_ekUDFZvX_zaC-jH-IOhZpaHU8GvlXwoirzoiksqOgTUXpVQnzIiMlyiGd0xwPe2uKg4/s1600/our+house.PNG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="637" data-original-width="960" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgIpr-1gaPWw9nD4Q2n2lsKxXtNtD_d5uP8cTZ433LFXMppKT6G7R5vpOND4Jzwf-3PKDb0S8o_ekUDFZvX_zaC-jH-IOhZpaHU8GvlXwoirzoiksqOgTUXpVQnzIiMlyiGd0xwPe2uKg4/s1600/our+house.PNG" width="750" /></a></div>
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The idea of the pocket community is that the neighbours will know and connect with each other, how fantastic is that for us? For me on my own? A real sense of community and security.</div>
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Our new house is gorgeous. Brand new with recycled wooden floors, a gas fireplace and an outlook over Oakley Creek and bush to my beloved <i>maunga</i>, Owairaka/Mt Albert.<br />
I can't believe we get to live there.<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjdG3SoSVvSsjP8aLFUCXVvJmUjG4CRE5JrOPRWSdM3bY_LAgqldQVPFg89pgFJvUW20EaenX0h-bD7onOPF58qgigIAZBIYH1uNoHQa890JEkJSlG3aDde0hVraXVD6EmeRAIZfJ9_eww/s1600/IMG_0197.PNG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="High ceilings, recycled wood floors, granite benchtops - all shiny new" border="0" data-original-height="637" data-original-width="954" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjdG3SoSVvSsjP8aLFUCXVvJmUjG4CRE5JrOPRWSdM3bY_LAgqldQVPFg89pgFJvUW20EaenX0h-bD7onOPF58qgigIAZBIYH1uNoHQa890JEkJSlG3aDde0hVraXVD6EmeRAIZfJ9_eww/s1600/IMG_0197.PNG" title="High ceilings, recycled wood floors, granite benchtops - all shiny new" width="750" /></a></div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEig8eECLxwbkm1e1pkeFPJzG9Y63bmb-qD1GR-xyzcqOCgUeugYGYvLfUmUG_iLt1GCJj0czgExDN30gk2ZuFKxiJHt_3BVZ-Q68gR0FJ-6SH94q6gQECUU9f7Wt1622RatzznC0eJ3BJY/s1600/IMG_0199.PNG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="Open plan living, three levels, wrap around decks" border="0" data-original-height="634" data-original-width="953" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEig8eECLxwbkm1e1pkeFPJzG9Y63bmb-qD1GR-xyzcqOCgUeugYGYvLfUmUG_iLt1GCJj0czgExDN30gk2ZuFKxiJHt_3BVZ-Q68gR0FJ-6SH94q6gQECUU9f7Wt1622RatzznC0eJ3BJY/s1600/IMG_0199.PNG" title="Open plan living, three levels, wrap around decks" width="750" /></a></div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhiiAFOAfOhvRGoD1cP-BRxbwZm3YPz9V-GUrzxaVLx9KDe0_Oim_wT0T5dsSKOYpVNFOos07zVgRLxNnsi_WV8mZ0ZNiffIzv1a-rUDta191tKVAL6mbTK6rCHODq1BVmFEdDhuI3yDZs/s1600/IMG_0200.PNG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="Out my kitchen and dining (double glazed) windows is a view over the bush to my maunga, Owairaka (Mt Albert)" border="0" data-original-height="635" data-original-width="955" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhiiAFOAfOhvRGoD1cP-BRxbwZm3YPz9V-GUrzxaVLx9KDe0_Oim_wT0T5dsSKOYpVNFOos07zVgRLxNnsi_WV8mZ0ZNiffIzv1a-rUDta191tKVAL6mbTK6rCHODq1BVmFEdDhuI3yDZs/s1600/IMG_0200.PNG" title="Out my kitchen and dining (double glazed) windows is a view over the bush to my maunga, Owairaka (Mt Albert)" width="750" /></a></div>
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(These are the home-staged real estate photos - I can't wait to make this house our home, with our eclectic mix of vintage, old and new. I've spent months selling off furniture I think won't suit the new house and collecting some new things. I will share the photos once we're in and set up, I promise)<br />
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Here's hoping this new move (and the new year) will be the beginning of happier times for all of us.<br />
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So wherever you are, however your Christmas went, I hope you get a chance to relax and enjoy some peace, and have a Happy New Year.<br />
See you all on the other side...<br />
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<span style="font-family: "courier new" , "courier" , monospace;">Goodbye 1920's Bungalow - our home for the last 11 years. You were good to us and we will always love you. (<a href="http://www.greatfun4kidsblog.com/p/at-my-house.html" target="_blank">My house stories collected here</a>)</span>Simoneyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09554122579485306611noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4940553413759896971.post-21324757475514644272017-11-02T14:26:00.002+13:002020-07-14T15:39:31.312+12:00A Starry Night 13th Birthday Party<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhmevioXaSVQnu9TbSEagMeiM6SkhJJAW4zGOGFY0_DW_WaQf3-FEdtGHiMwxLSBsapT19pW8PireSBm5xqUizEFWtVTAzEPFiYV1Tsv8LPKneGn2Yd0et9HLNollcVnN0yRo-Wjz80vmM/s1600/Starry+Night+Party+title.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="A Starry Night 13th Birthday Party" border="0" data-original-height="563" data-original-width="750" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhmevioXaSVQnu9TbSEagMeiM6SkhJJAW4zGOGFY0_DW_WaQf3-FEdtGHiMwxLSBsapT19pW8PireSBm5xqUizEFWtVTAzEPFiYV1Tsv8LPKneGn2Yd0et9HLNollcVnN0yRo-Wjz80vmM/s1600/Starry+Night+Party+title.jpg" title="A Starry Night 13th Birthday Party" /></a></div>
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Ahhhhh, the <i>Starry Night </i>birthday party for Miss Fab's 13th - what a great night it was. It's about time I shared this party with you, aye? I mean, it's only taken three months!<br />
Turns out, this is most likely the very last party that will ever be hosted here, but more on that another time...<br />
For now here is a magical, star-studded birthday celebration that a bunch of 13-year-old girls thought was super-fun, cool and cute. We hit the spot just right with decor. We had some ironic "throwback-to-our-childhood" activities, and we had some adventures up a hill. All in all a great time was had by all, and it was also very very pretty...<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgX88JMbwMhgLM3Mj8xuXRpJ2ayeR_CIkmk5l_n-Xj-5UcUM32DE380uVfO0e-Ckn88qxjEV6JpzkzSayHKEssr8NAHcFpDJQdL5euApvVYyOzhyphenhyphenyUOwb8s3vELsORPgFrRk58h_Pee-os/s1600/starrynightparty0051.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="Starry Night Party dessert table" border="0" data-original-height="563" data-original-width="750" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgX88JMbwMhgLM3Mj8xuXRpJ2ayeR_CIkmk5l_n-Xj-5UcUM32DE380uVfO0e-Ckn88qxjEV6JpzkzSayHKEssr8NAHcFpDJQdL5euApvVYyOzhyphenhyphenyUOwb8s3vELsORPgFrRk58h_Pee-os/s1600/starrynightparty0051.JPG" title="Starry Night Party dessert table" /></a></div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhTb_pjGP0gFGnO63TFCY9Nxg9_ONL9q3Ydm8pP8peJwnyAQ_wLcPKUiVnGhyuW5Q11NmIqJ0yppZWDdIfI3e_tC-8Qx0FnLkPZt5YRxnUFexrsNFLgp8WNUIzcYAfvm9fIYg6mENJ00gM/s1600/starrynightparty0060.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="Glitter Jar lanterns" border="0" data-original-height="563" data-original-width="750" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhTb_pjGP0gFGnO63TFCY9Nxg9_ONL9q3Ydm8pP8peJwnyAQ_wLcPKUiVnGhyuW5Q11NmIqJ0yppZWDdIfI3e_tC-8Qx0FnLkPZt5YRxnUFexrsNFLgp8WNUIzcYAfvm9fIYg6mENJ00gM/s1600/starrynightparty0060.JPG" title="Glitter Jar lanterns" /></a></div>
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Navy and silver; a scattering of starry confetti over a navy blue sheet. Jar lanterns lathered in glue and dipped in glitter. Stars everywhere...<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjfJcnXiUR-kBkGtXABeV0i7yUjcURWytzFHBxi3BYLaY6ksaYgIxnzILjqltOTLFBLL59kUIEXTH1t0Gnx8btFaJTNAP9wCZaervHB_7JciZ2vikRURpY5PE-jSOFe86zDwxL07w7pigk/s1600/starrynightparty0042.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="Starry Night Party - star cupcake toppers and giant marshmallows" border="0" data-original-height="563" data-original-width="750" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjfJcnXiUR-kBkGtXABeV0i7yUjcURWytzFHBxi3BYLaY6ksaYgIxnzILjqltOTLFBLL59kUIEXTH1t0Gnx8btFaJTNAP9wCZaervHB_7JciZ2vikRURpY5PE-jSOFe86zDwxL07w7pigk/s1600/starrynightparty0042.JPG" title="Starry Night Party - star cupcake toppers and giant marshmallows" /></a></div>
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<a href="https://www.aliexpress.com/item/4-Meter-Star-shaped-Star-Garland-Photo-Backdrop-Prop-Birthday-Party-Starry-Nights-Paper-Wedding-Garland/32791966801.html?spm=a2g0s.9042311.0.0.vkPt69" target="_blank">Star Garlands </a>(Ali Express); <a href="https://www.wish.com/c/58ca5d29863ac6527d16ba79" target="_blank">confetti plates</a> (Wish); <a href="http://www.kmart.co.nz/webapp/wcs/stores/servlet/SearchDisplay?searchTerm=star&categoryId=&storeId=20701&catalogId=20102&langId=-1&pageSize=30&beginIndex=0&sType=SimpleSearch&resultCatEntryType=2&showResultsPage=true&searchSource=Q&pageView=&orderBy=5" target="_blank">star napkins</a> (Kmart); <a href="https://www.poprocparties.co.nz/collections/twinkle-twinkle-little-star/products/silver-polka-dot-cupcake-cups" target="_blank">Cupcake cups</a> and <a href="https://www.poprocparties.co.nz/collections/twinkle-twinkle-little-star/products/metallic-silver-star-confetti" target="_blank">star glitter</a> (Pop Roc Parties); <a href="https://www.thewarehouse.co.nz/p/rocky-mountain-mega-white-marshmallows-790g/R1600522.html#q=marshmallows&start=1" target="_blank">Giant marshmallows</a> (the Warehouse); star cupcake toppers were homemade (by the birthday girl and her crafty pal Ruby).<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhDWLXbbYqJVsfrTc7aVBB8SuOeeV0Yi8aG5TITCeV-sEzs7exYP9UplcJjt3Id-NHf8bLHPExMYuL5gLY7ItMD8IMHYhkrnu8QUcnTFZLahluthcZtf0cTrD9f-611ZktwhIlgX9leZG0/s1600/starrynightparty0049.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="Starry cupcakes - with blue geode sprinkles from Kiwicakes" border="0" data-original-height="563" data-original-width="750" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhDWLXbbYqJVsfrTc7aVBB8SuOeeV0Yi8aG5TITCeV-sEzs7exYP9UplcJjt3Id-NHf8bLHPExMYuL5gLY7ItMD8IMHYhkrnu8QUcnTFZLahluthcZtf0cTrD9f-611ZktwhIlgX9leZG0/s1600/starrynightparty0049.JPG" title="Starry cupcakes - with blue geode sprinkles from Kiwicakes" /></a></div>
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We made two types of cupcakes: The beautiful white-frosted ones with the star topper (below) and these ones (above), which were blue and white marble cakes, with navy blue buttercream decorated with <a href="http://www.kiwicakes.co.nz/kiwi/sprinkles-and-edible-decorations-sprinkle-medleys-sprinkle-medley-blue-geode-150g-p-16352.html" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">blue geode sprinkle mix </a>(from the amazing "mixologist" at <a href="http://www.kiwicakes.co.nz/kiwi/sprinkles-and-edible-decorations-sprinkle-medleys-sprinkle-medley-blue-geode-150g-p-16352.html" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">Kiwicakes</a>).<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiaTnnjenUnvd7c4gxTnSBqmVRZOxEfjqRl5Zdp7WwjC_WwZJ5nwviHdUkk3B3SNPTrJFFS3DFSivsTQOdDv0LBP64ECuinH263RIrHpVpZMiEEedr-WIoi1OoegozLOV71_aHDjmgNFA4/s1600/starrynightparty0056.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="Vanilla cupcake with silver star topper - simple awesomeness" border="0" data-original-height="563" data-original-width="750" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiaTnnjenUnvd7c4gxTnSBqmVRZOxEfjqRl5Zdp7WwjC_WwZJ5nwviHdUkk3B3SNPTrJFFS3DFSivsTQOdDv0LBP64ECuinH263RIrHpVpZMiEEedr-WIoi1OoegozLOV71_aHDjmgNFA4/s1600/starrynightparty0056.JPG" title="Vanilla cupcake with silver star topper - simple awesomeness" /></a></div>
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This was a mid-winter birthday party outdoors, which is always a risk, but happily the sun shone, and later on actual stars came out. Still a brisk night, but the roaring fire and cosy blankets to snuggle under made sure nobody felt the winter's chill.</div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjvM9e3_eR5tQOaQaz9iwkJxQfhDa9Fpq419ExDnAGOOM6eSP672qu2hRDoJRYk6He4xYLShwUMu5z-RFe22eAQ2WnEUs4LN5ulJmwKSg7TOzCMP8k8XashoRPklbcZazhlmumi9QH-8yA/s1600/starrynightparty0070.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="Firepit made from an old concrete washtub" border="0" data-original-height="563" data-original-width="750" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjvM9e3_eR5tQOaQaz9iwkJxQfhDa9Fpq419ExDnAGOOM6eSP672qu2hRDoJRYk6He4xYLShwUMu5z-RFe22eAQ2WnEUs4LN5ulJmwKSg7TOzCMP8k8XashoRPklbcZazhlmumi9QH-8yA/s1600/starrynightparty0070.JPG" title="Firepit made from an old concrete washtub" /></a></div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgeJ7zH7djI38Kk7zpNmuwEi9QA4b3gQn29qI9cXlBSSRBe9DRtw4gBYhhAd1v33-RP7o0fsPwaMSmYH7Z7blpLxJY9kk3_RjVihKT04rjNpWuMa3QlDZFWl43dzUKXtR1ZdGG0v60A71c/s1600/starrynightparty0066.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="Blankets to snuggle up with; glowsticks and sparklers to play with" border="0" data-original-height="563" data-original-width="750" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgeJ7zH7djI38Kk7zpNmuwEi9QA4b3gQn29qI9cXlBSSRBe9DRtw4gBYhhAd1v33-RP7o0fsPwaMSmYH7Z7blpLxJY9kk3_RjVihKT04rjNpWuMa3QlDZFWl43dzUKXtR1ZdGG0v60A71c/s1600/starrynightparty0066.JPG" title="Blankets to snuggle up with; glowsticks and sparklers to play with" /></a></div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhEHmiwQd1A936rNG5PBxrpmF6E-D_5wMrMD-OKewOrI-af2LA2tOL__LcXbUWLFSMHiIn8kDWwNG4teEkKIwcyJN16y3Ev07mFxqPCUI1YvPwiDhPJhF6C0PagotGwfy80eSXkubuJZRM/s1600/starrynightparty0038.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="jar lanterns - just lather with gluestick and then dip in glitter..." border="0" data-original-height="563" data-original-width="750" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhEHmiwQd1A936rNG5PBxrpmF6E-D_5wMrMD-OKewOrI-af2LA2tOL__LcXbUWLFSMHiIn8kDWwNG4teEkKIwcyJN16y3Ev07mFxqPCUI1YvPwiDhPJhF6C0PagotGwfy80eSXkubuJZRM/s1600/starrynightparty0038.JPG" title="jar lanterns - just lather with gluestick and then dip in glitter..." /></a></div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh2jixRGvJPBuzIV1UdVmzPg5f8iJQw3UIP78DQCbUPm2YE4ghhyphenhyphen_TDmw9edLiFJAK4zYYOAhbFs_ozzqp9ARAQ9xedjfLY-oXJi3x42Od3qxbMUzRc4Yi0zX1VIQZWDQYvlW6rCiM8w_0/s1600/starrynightparty0071.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="Firepit all ready and blazing..." border="0" data-original-height="563" data-original-width="750" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh2jixRGvJPBuzIV1UdVmzPg5f8iJQw3UIP78DQCbUPm2YE4ghhyphenhyphen_TDmw9edLiFJAK4zYYOAhbFs_ozzqp9ARAQ9xedjfLY-oXJi3x42Od3qxbMUzRc4Yi0zX1VIQZWDQYvlW6rCiM8w_0/s1600/starrynightparty0071.JPG" title="Firepit all ready and blazing..." /></a></div>
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To entertain the masses, we supplied sparklers (left over from last year's Guy Fawkes) and glowsticks. But the surprise hit was the Silver Star Pinata (twelve bucks from <a href="http://www.kmart.co.nz/product/silver-look-foil-star-pinata/844845" target="_blank">Kmart</a> - I couldn't <i>make </i>it for that).<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiRBx3eMPuBBXFPp6YoNslj_zAdiSspNNlbfGwPTfiTetvbcw33Yt457grzWxc5iD4ctLQyboEH_TUzl6np8NZbYpRpIn2-xNfJ_hS4saRb75OiRr66Yd7DEU-jvZVBdOBJcJ1fzAhdmZ8/s1600/starrynightparty0035.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="silver star pinata from Kmart" border="0" data-original-height="563" data-original-width="750" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiRBx3eMPuBBXFPp6YoNslj_zAdiSspNNlbfGwPTfiTetvbcw33Yt457grzWxc5iD4ctLQyboEH_TUzl6np8NZbYpRpIn2-xNfJ_hS4saRb75OiRr66Yd7DEU-jvZVBdOBJcJ1fzAhdmZ8/s1600/starrynightparty0035.JPG" title="silver star pinata from Kmart" /></a></div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEijcfpnt104-O61CAK1rTs2DDWMXGmQxkg1tMJV1sc3pBITdCFXn_oHC7pdJ3mWuoR-NRye2fvOz12n-f2KWuLYZ8D5tQfRbBWFEA5f4z_ZxFwEjne_SX-QwITNVw5kbJKmkCgjHsvgv-M/s1600/starrynightparty0080.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="Teenage girls get a kick out of smashing a pinata ("like when we were kids")" border="0" data-original-height="563" data-original-width="750" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEijcfpnt104-O61CAK1rTs2DDWMXGmQxkg1tMJV1sc3pBITdCFXn_oHC7pdJ3mWuoR-NRye2fvOz12n-f2KWuLYZ8D5tQfRbBWFEA5f4z_ZxFwEjne_SX-QwITNVw5kbJKmkCgjHsvgv-M/s1600/starrynightparty0080.JPG" title="Teenage girls get a kick out of smashing a pinata ("like when we were kids")" /></a></div>
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The guests - now so old and wise in their newly hatched teenageness - thought it was a hoot to "throwback to our childhood" (said without an ounce of irony).<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjTUljHGFCjbvZkISD_WfcRiOZuhB6ExZXZ88bDnNT9YJJH7KovTkkRuGMORirqJrcAj6Si70T54SceoPIx05Vcqx5xE81-xyYATLwwC5RRpZABv6FDQklsMJuIXRPBIeeQC8YHe1KkG8o/s1600/starrynightparty0087.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="birthday girl takes a swing at the pinata" border="0" data-original-height="563" data-original-width="750" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjTUljHGFCjbvZkISD_WfcRiOZuhB6ExZXZ88bDnNT9YJJH7KovTkkRuGMORirqJrcAj6Si70T54SceoPIx05Vcqx5xE81-xyYATLwwC5RRpZABv6FDQklsMJuIXRPBIeeQC8YHe1KkG8o/s1600/starrynightparty0087.JPG" title="birthday girl takes a swing at the pinata" /></a></div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEilPi_IykkXCdqdGcCtb0lfwyM44nYuj1r9-P_-MCJixiD9h5KYolmuSmBZtHNc1UOCfKJ4Bey7T5UurnFBEfKmNvEVWKb2idfbSBhH6A8X_cZCBHhY3UMiT29wtsPbBjHNCxXiUDlCQSo/s1600/starrynightparty0064.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="jar lanterns all lit and lookin pretty" border="0" data-original-height="563" data-original-width="750" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEilPi_IykkXCdqdGcCtb0lfwyM44nYuj1r9-P_-MCJixiD9h5KYolmuSmBZtHNc1UOCfKJ4Bey7T5UurnFBEfKmNvEVWKb2idfbSBhH6A8X_cZCBHhY3UMiT29wtsPbBjHNCxXiUDlCQSo/s1600/starrynightparty0064.JPG" title="jar lanterns all lit and lookin pretty" /></a></div>
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For fun with teens just add fire, in any form. Be it toasting giant marshmallows, lighting sparklers or letting off sky lanterns up a mountain - fire is fun.<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEihQCwpqK9DsZak8LtaXWJ5wlPp7R9kJaf87QOXjavw_fmmTB5L9l3NH1Xu2hy23t6xvYbKq6KtSLJJtuOkFIZvubXK9rRhbM70WJFvT6-_K_HgAOv42-ARlnn0wJAG8khnMgvygqt6gIk/s1600/starrynightparty0104.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="563" data-original-width="750" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEihQCwpqK9DsZak8LtaXWJ5wlPp7R9kJaf87QOXjavw_fmmTB5L9l3NH1Xu2hy23t6xvYbKq6KtSLJJtuOkFIZvubXK9rRhbM70WJFvT6-_K_HgAOv42-ARlnn0wJAG8khnMgvygqt6gIk/s1600/starrynightparty0104.JPG" /></a></div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjHN0t5ZKMQCNdTUM9qFrD09KN1A-49iE1sQtcQ59Dn5zA5hSWbI3uHfT9zEdP_-mum4ghlKzh9dswFd3AogGbS6xuKLdEVIon1vO6wsTo4lB8hbDy-v43bSr2mlLMv-Tx2Or1PiauHFK8/s1600/starrynightparty0137.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="563" data-original-width="750" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjHN0t5ZKMQCNdTUM9qFrD09KN1A-49iE1sQtcQ59Dn5zA5hSWbI3uHfT9zEdP_-mum4ghlKzh9dswFd3AogGbS6xuKLdEVIon1vO6wsTo4lB8hbDy-v43bSr2mlLMv-Tx2Or1PiauHFK8/s1600/starrynightparty0137.JPG" /></a></div>
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For even more fun, climb a mountain the dark. Being blessed with a beautiful starry night, that's what we did - we climbed our local hill to let off sky lanterns. When I planned this party, I had visions of a teenage version of that scene in <i>Tangled</i>... but sadly I'd bought the cheap sky lanterns and they were total crap. They just wouldn't light!<br />
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We persevered trying to light one for about half an hour... one lantern kinda caught light, floated sideways for a few metres then took a death roll and burst into flames (oops)<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjyZP2PzFAPJ6hu1gkRC-jiBdjtwjXsrilSyPthpSHAGCX7NX8t1JhHSj3k0-sCsNNbnpoT_apr8jjaOxAdZidVodm_tEz8CC1q4upjyPLQsOj29fhRHSMBxrFeHpI7Ye6Ik1f0osN6tSc/s1600/starrynightparty0143.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="(The one that finally got away)" border="0" data-original-height="563" data-original-width="750" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjyZP2PzFAPJ6hu1gkRC-jiBdjtwjXsrilSyPthpSHAGCX7NX8t1JhHSj3k0-sCsNNbnpoT_apr8jjaOxAdZidVodm_tEz8CC1q4upjyPLQsOj29fhRHSMBxrFeHpI7Ye6Ik1f0osN6tSc/s1600/starrynightparty0143.JPG" title="(The one that finally got away)" /></a></div>
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We tried one more time and *finally* successfully launched one lantern skywards, at which point we ran, giggling and screeching, back to the cars. It was an adventure in the dark on a starry night. Money can't buy that. (But money <i>can - </i>and should <i>- </i>buy better sky lanterns).<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjUofYhYQqFRikFIlRqj2oB1xP-WfjfxvnabeqkXVDN3zHklyRCajhSqQo4FsBKurBrzFPBILz_P16vEtzkrk0RTz3c7UFknss7ZRbHlLAUcxXLgSy7dImw51K9OichPQDUZRQf-oBQ-Qo/s1600/starrynightparty0149.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="starry night birthday cake" border="0" data-original-height="563" data-original-width="750" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjUofYhYQqFRikFIlRqj2oB1xP-WfjfxvnabeqkXVDN3zHklyRCajhSqQo4FsBKurBrzFPBILz_P16vEtzkrk0RTz3c7UFknss7ZRbHlLAUcxXLgSy7dImw51K9OichPQDUZRQf-oBQ-Qo/s1600/starrynightparty0149.JPG" title="starry night birthday cake" /></a></div>
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By now it was definitely time for cake.<br />
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This one was made to the birthday girl's exacting specifications ("<i>simple please mum; a marble cake; and can I have an ombre effect?"</i>)<br />
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The thing that totally made this cake was the <a href="http://www.kiwicakes.co.nz/kiwi/sprinkles-and-edible-decorations-sprinkle-medleys-sprinkle-medley-blue-geode-150g-p-16352.html">beautiful sprinkle mix</a> from <a href="http://www.kiwicakes.co.nz/kiwi/sprinkles-and-edible-decorations-sprinkle-medleys-sprinkle-medley-blue-geode-150g-p-16352.html" rel="nofollow">Kiwicakes</a>. Sandra (Mrs Kiwicakes) is what is known in the biz as a<i> mixologist</i>. This "<a href="http://www.kiwicakes.co.nz/kiwi/sprinkles-and-edible-decorations-sprinkle-medleys-sprinkle-medley-blue-geode-150g-p-16352.html">blue geode</a>" mix of hers was perfect for this cake...<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiQNl-jbNo6NZpMc-DmGDgbncFZQnCcwDTarlH-fyKlv6pv08jPplSzl75h4NWDmabDUSf5FovXhItmIIIoKtNDFEvY8H6OaydOKEHVvFOwkqvWzY8vLod4IBtp8h4e6F0-v5UsG6BpR8A/s1600/starrynightparty0022.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="starry night birthday cake with blue geode sprinkle mix on top - from Kiwicakes" border="0" data-original-height="563" data-original-width="750" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiQNl-jbNo6NZpMc-DmGDgbncFZQnCcwDTarlH-fyKlv6pv08jPplSzl75h4NWDmabDUSf5FovXhItmIIIoKtNDFEvY8H6OaydOKEHVvFOwkqvWzY8vLod4IBtp8h4e6F0-v5UsG6BpR8A/s1600/starrynightparty0022.JPG" title="starry night birthday cake with blue geode sprinkle mix on top - from Kiwicakes" /></a></div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhYymMEyfJHRn5W8YIEY1jHSNRBcW6HTMFjB2k8zC9CDAtm4VLyIcEY9lgrwukuObu8HQ9BbIv0_uWBq3tzycb7eepiZTT13Ko9gtg9N0_PzKi7P8tqQ_U71o7N9ymPnxW-gY9HMDWHevw/s1600/starrynightparty0024.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="There's that ombre effect up the sides (of my slightly wibbly wobbly cake)..." border="0" data-original-height="563" data-original-width="750" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhYymMEyfJHRn5W8YIEY1jHSNRBcW6HTMFjB2k8zC9CDAtm4VLyIcEY9lgrwukuObu8HQ9BbIv0_uWBq3tzycb7eepiZTT13Ko9gtg9N0_PzKi7P8tqQ_U71o7N9ymPnxW-gY9HMDWHevw/s1600/starrynightparty0024.JPG" title="There's that ombre effect up the sides (of my slightly wibbly wobbly cake)..." /></a></div>
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You know I've never pretended to be a pro-cake maker. For some reason my cakes are always a bit lopsided no matter how hard I try, but thanks to the coolness Sandra sends me, they look amazing nonetheless.<br />
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To save time (and <i>effort</i> cos I hate mixing buttercream) Sandra sent me a <a href="http://www.kiwicakes.co.nz/kiwi/fondant-and-icings-ready-to-use-icing-tubes-and-pouches-ready-to-use-buttercream-icing-tube-royal-blue-p-2945.html">pre-mixed tub of blue buttercream frosting</a>, which I added a bit of black food colouring to, darkening it to a more "navy/night sky" shade. Smoothing some of the original colour around the sides and blending it gave it that ombre effect the birthday girl asked for.<br />
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Here's a collage of the cake process...<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEitSHAKAlSkqnzIUhtl7NYTADcVp1M0zOOV0xVJukoJ9M2LNjQVRjzE3hJfGW1H_03LtsyFdLLawdRi6P5JgOkwDNaZwDHxcp68s8jC08hpOGi7R5f4iTxXX8xIAQYdaIpaC70nnBk3yq8/s1600/marble+cake+collage.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="Marble cake process collage" border="0" data-original-height="750" data-original-width="750" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEitSHAKAlSkqnzIUhtl7NYTADcVp1M0zOOV0xVJukoJ9M2LNjQVRjzE3hJfGW1H_03LtsyFdLLawdRi6P5JgOkwDNaZwDHxcp68s8jC08hpOGi7R5f4iTxXX8xIAQYdaIpaC70nnBk3yq8/s1600/marble+cake+collage.jpg" title="Marble cake process collage" /></a></div>
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Outside? An ombre night-sky masterpiece Vincent Van Gogh himself would approve of; inside? a swirly marble cake in blue and white. So easy to do (just make your favourite vanilla cake mix; separate into two bowls, then add <a href="http://www.kiwicakes.co.nz/kiwi/advanced_search_result.php?keywords=blue+gel+colour&kiwi=bkhc2ivck2brknku55kkjlq672&x=15&y=17" target="_blank">blue gel food colouring </a>to one bowl of mix. Put blobs of colour randomly into a greased cake tin, then use a skewer to swirl the colours together and bake.<br />
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Repeat process for a two-layer cake. Sandwich together with buttercream. Slather the whole thing with more buttercream; use your latent artist skills to smear the sides with an ombre effect... and then sprinkle on your night sky...<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjxc-YZ5mY_LI22e9iaNx4vRIfl0iNr6FotdbjSikqRFBToSZcHesaTmDHbSdvzBnHSCX6v4Ns5ufQs1DL-D_Ape7B1TTNLesgOqarrxugdYSz1Es5v75K9h5JJOrVpVs00nerH3XIH_vE/s1600/starrynightparty0020.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="Just enough sprinkles to turn our cake into a starry night masterpiece" border="0" data-original-height="563" data-original-width="750" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjxc-YZ5mY_LI22e9iaNx4vRIfl0iNr6FotdbjSikqRFBToSZcHesaTmDHbSdvzBnHSCX6v4Ns5ufQs1DL-D_Ape7B1TTNLesgOqarrxugdYSz1Es5v75K9h5JJOrVpVs00nerH3XIH_vE/s1600/starrynightparty0020.JPG" title="Just enough sprinkles to turn our cake into a starry night masterpiece" /></a></div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj51jSB14WNWngVX3cMxSS9WCX6xJZDmLNNy_zB4yNuueoy3h4hNv-R1FhCMX8aMX43vhltMWw8ZyqZJp7_6x0qPqtTH9J48A15bnDVbaQoRRlncIqyged_oxlLQbuf4AYpyGqi8V899xc/s1600/starrynightparty0024.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="563" data-original-width="750" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj51jSB14WNWngVX3cMxSS9WCX6xJZDmLNNy_zB4yNuueoy3h4hNv-R1FhCMX8aMX43vhltMWw8ZyqZJp7_6x0qPqtTH9J48A15bnDVbaQoRRlncIqyged_oxlLQbuf4AYpyGqi8V899xc/s1600/starrynightparty0024.JPG" /></a></div>
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The birthday girl loved it. And I am in love with the geode sprinkle mix.<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgxf8LaD7jWmygjfQAE8ZqU8UuGAaciljSh1hEVAC0ZieUc05mDo9eWTkATzTqC1YpM4FGj8cTefvQXeF6HSQLqYpEMiqlvpXJld9sjWVZ5VcsDxtrL_zPKGlt3NEjdN_X4Nsno6k66VDI/s1600/starrynightparty0151.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="Happy 13th birthday Miss Fab!" border="0" data-original-height="563" data-original-width="750" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgxf8LaD7jWmygjfQAE8ZqU8UuGAaciljSh1hEVAC0ZieUc05mDo9eWTkATzTqC1YpM4FGj8cTefvQXeF6HSQLqYpEMiqlvpXJld9sjWVZ5VcsDxtrL_zPKGlt3NEjdN_X4Nsno6k66VDI/s1600/starrynightparty0151.JPG" title="Happy 13th birthday Miss Fab!" /></a></div>
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<a href="http://www.greatfun4kidsblog.com/2009/07/wordless-wednesday-having-ball.html" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"></a><br />
That's it. My <a href="http://www.greatfun4kidsblog.com/2017/07/a-tribute-to-my-daughter-on-almost-eve.html" target="_blank">baby girl is a teenager</a>, her party was epic (our adventure up the hill was talked about for days) and the candles were "dabbed" out.<br />
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It's hard to believe that this might be the last party post I write?!<br />
I'll explain soon. But in the meantime, I hope you enjoyed this one (I know <i>we </i>did).<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiyKME6G0GnGER6z-cuZSZoaqup13wtoZfZG-Ka4ramCE2qNIZtiDxZkDdFzefTk3uRWpQDxsx9G_6I7k-edRCmIf6ctd37Nhyphenhyphenhom3ZXolVwoPYA6ZkVrUdXe4rTT8dOC7PaPk6bdzjzZY/s1600/STarry+night+party+collage.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="Starry Night Party" border="0" data-original-height="1284" data-original-width="1600" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiyKME6G0GnGER6z-cuZSZoaqup13wtoZfZG-Ka4ramCE2qNIZtiDxZkDdFzefTk3uRWpQDxsx9G_6I7k-edRCmIf6ctd37Nhyphenhyphenhom3ZXolVwoPYA6ZkVrUdXe4rTT8dOC7PaPk6bdzjzZY/s1600/STarry+night+party+collage.jpg" title="Starry Night Party" width="760" /></a></div>
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MISS FAB'S OTHER GIRLY PARTIES<br />
<a href="http://www.greatfun4kidsblog.com/2012/07/a-brilliant-baking-birthday-party.html" target="_blank"><span style="font-family: inherit;">Baking Birthday Party</span></a><br />
<a href="http://www.greatfun4kidsblog.com/2010/08/rather-fancy-party.html" target="_blank"><span style="font-family: inherit;">Fancy Nancy Party</span></a><br />
<a href="http://www.greatfun4kidsblog.com/2008/08/fairy-party.html" target="_blank"><span style="font-family: inherit;">Fairy Party</span></a><br />
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><a href="http://www.greatfun4kidsblog.com/2014/10/a-garden-fairy-party-just-because.html">Garden Fairy Party *Just because*</a></span><br />
<a href="http://www.greatfun4kidsblog.com/2015/07/la-cafe-de-paris-party-cest-magnifique.html" target="_blank">Paris Party - (La Cafe de Paris)</a><br />
<a href="http://www.greatfun4kidsblog.com/2009/07/wordless-wednesday-having-ball.html" target="_blank"><span style="font-family: inherit;">Royal Ball (Princess) Party</span></a><br />
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<a href="http://www.greatfun4kidsblog.com/2014/07/girly-sleepover-party-goes-off.html" target="_blank"><span style="font-family: inherit;">Sleepover Party (Girly & Fabulous)</span></a><br />
<a href="http://www.greatfun4kidsblog.com/2013/07/snowflakes-skating-ice-princess-party.html" target="_blank"><span style="font-family: inherit;">Snowflakes & Skating ((Frozen) Party</span></a></div>
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<a href="http://www.greatfun4kidsblog.com/2011/08/tangled-party.html" style="font-family: inherit;" target="_blank">Tangled (Rapunzel) Party</a><br />
<a href="http://www.greatfun4kidsblog.com/2016/08/a-magical-woodland-campfire-party.html" target="_blank">Woodland Campfire Party</a><br />
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<a href="http://www.kiwicakes.co.nz/" rel="nofollow"><img src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiUKfwdAT2vkfsEye1CVPor0w9Kt8vCtCjonwsrW6Y3el3jDvm5knovTYMrYEu7xkVT8uD_2SPS3pKgnyBo2cWuGCiNiBZda1eP7ESnElzY9RU02kFZMnCkLVXqBiNuO-npxBR_APHH1_A/s1600/kiwicakes+partner+post+banner+NEW.jpg" width="750" /></a> Simoneyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09554122579485306611noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4940553413759896971.post-58167626253083290622017-07-24T19:16:00.000+12:002020-03-28T16:43:46.441+13:00A Tribute to my Daughter on the Eve of her 13th Birthday<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiVRt1NP1qcxwWAxl52HcPnbNeB5C6Uc7va25jaXXqRPLDa-Q_XVRHjyzOWA-XwdU3nhg80Vh94DQNa6r-j2RmI3Pj6B65XEnkvtU69bi-iHuIp87r_nTXORgZ_ic2zcImorQ1nDdbxFQE/s1600/abby13th0019.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="Can't believe she's nearly 13" border="0" data-original-height="563" data-original-width="750" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiVRt1NP1qcxwWAxl52HcPnbNeB5C6Uc7va25jaXXqRPLDa-Q_XVRHjyzOWA-XwdU3nhg80Vh94DQNa6r-j2RmI3Pj6B65XEnkvtU69bi-iHuIp87r_nTXORgZ_ic2zcImorQ1nDdbxFQE/s1600/abby13th0019.JPG" title="Can't believe she's nearly 13" /></a></div>
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My fabulous girl is turning thirteen on Friday. THIRTEEN.<br />
She's nearly as tall as I am, wears the same size shoes and is, simply put, gorgeous.<br />
It's always a super-busy week pre-party but I didn't want this occasion to pass by without me marking it with some kind of a written tribute, because that's what I do. I write stuff. I like to reflect on the passing of time, and plant a few marker stones along the way. I like to look back and say, <i>wow, look how far we've come.</i><br />
And we have come a really long way. When I started writing this blog nine years ago my girl was a feisty four-year-old.<br />
I've got nine years of her life recorded here in case the details get a little fuzzy with my encroaching old age (haha).<br />
Let the record show that my daughter is Brave. She is Strong. She is Hilarious.<br />
As she gets older I see more and more clearly what an amazing person she is - look out world, here she comes.<br />
One of the bravest people I know.<br />
One of the funniest people I know.<br />
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A girl with a big heart and an outsized sense of justice. Watch out if you get on the wrong side of her - bullies beware. She'll take you on whatever your size. She's been doing it for years.<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgP6KZhiBrPULNtcdwOOgfnrYax5t2Dcw2jtAIswdtcGI6_45R5wG2VIqLlJu7VETWePXL_ASv1F5T9jeVbedvtN4KiAZBrk36D66RBxPydhAI1PAGsjdigg4AMnOnnLkTMy0xX5UO66X4/s1600/13th+birthday+collage+1.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"></a></div>
<a name='more'></a><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgP6KZhiBrPULNtcdwOOgfnrYax5t2Dcw2jtAIswdtcGI6_45R5wG2VIqLlJu7VETWePXL_ASv1F5T9jeVbedvtN4KiAZBrk36D66RBxPydhAI1PAGsjdigg4AMnOnnLkTMy0xX5UO66X4/s1600/13th+birthday+collage+1.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="My Fab Girl" border="0" data-original-height="750" data-original-width="750" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgP6KZhiBrPULNtcdwOOgfnrYax5t2Dcw2jtAIswdtcGI6_45R5wG2VIqLlJu7VETWePXL_ASv1F5T9jeVbedvtN4KiAZBrk36D66RBxPydhAI1PAGsjdigg4AMnOnnLkTMy0xX5UO66X4/s1600/13th+birthday+collage+1.jpg" title="My Fab Girl" /></a><br />
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My daughter runs full tilt at life and has the cast collection to prove it. (Every year, her goal has been to avoid the Emergency Room - something we have yet to achieve.)<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiazkiYr6KHRZLkL7j0VluKJ-9t9MxGSFQMA9HOP9rDS_hVI9V-kmllxY-AvJH605Bycamppip-flhu9CvN-L7OWLnYQ6o9W-1T8kMeUyHagwtcThug2AaaZnwoa7TDY82mkd5tidfMnik/s1600/abby13th20001.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="Age Three" border="0" data-original-height="563" data-original-width="750" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiazkiYr6KHRZLkL7j0VluKJ-9t9MxGSFQMA9HOP9rDS_hVI9V-kmllxY-AvJH605Bycamppip-flhu9CvN-L7OWLnYQ6o9W-1T8kMeUyHagwtcThug2AaaZnwoa7TDY82mkd5tidfMnik/s1600/abby13th20001.JPG" title="Age Three" /></a></div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgmSA5rqqWCnyXKz_xvxiSiB9a6Uw7-isEXmbd4z7rgxGGUKR7e91-2OhsGW9xGHvuf6mfEJGKho1m7fOCrYWRr32YcNKRRTs5FtzemBh57M7sip7HxRR6RDakFeZdrYNV7veUx9ZWyh2I/s1600/abby13th20003.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="Age 5" border="0" data-original-height="563" data-original-width="750" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgmSA5rqqWCnyXKz_xvxiSiB9a6Uw7-isEXmbd4z7rgxGGUKR7e91-2OhsGW9xGHvuf6mfEJGKho1m7fOCrYWRr32YcNKRRTs5FtzemBh57M7sip7HxRR6RDakFeZdrYNV7veUx9ZWyh2I/s1600/abby13th20003.JPG" title="Age 5" /></a></div>
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Much to my delight, she's a reader. She loves good YA Fiction and these days we swap books and binge-watch Netflix series together.<br />
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She looks out for me, making sure I am taken care of on my birthday and Mother's Day (she's flipping amazing like that).<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgWK-NspDDvMArZDtu8ASaV7CDXDNz7SO7XOFgXRjKmh_lA5979NVz-coebodgHhNqKG6bmustNJLcAge91j_nBYwS-3tKseRg24LJCcRXc58lO5y-Gb8Hp0fTBGlHkq687A9vD5pLp1_0/s1600/abby13th0009.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="969" data-original-width="750" height="640" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgWK-NspDDvMArZDtu8ASaV7CDXDNz7SO7XOFgXRjKmh_lA5979NVz-coebodgHhNqKG6bmustNJLcAge91j_nBYwS-3tKseRg24LJCcRXc58lO5y-Gb8Hp0fTBGlHkq687A9vD5pLp1_0/s640/abby13th0009.JPG" width="494" /></a></div>
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<a href="http://www.greatfun4kidsblog.com/2009/07/wordless-wednesday-having-ball.html" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"></a><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgqXmUAM0-yDDp9GvJsHAA7VFCFD5KBTO2SrjXR3Qm32gUqr7NWs1QNJmn1HgDZoSHBvabPJApOFSKWPxNp9BeKDuPKclwEInTgl07ASzKmRxS2qwlYJwksF9c5_iVibpyK6ODHW4oiYSs/s1600/abby13th0014.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="753" data-original-width="750" height="640" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgqXmUAM0-yDDp9GvJsHAA7VFCFD5KBTO2SrjXR3Qm32gUqr7NWs1QNJmn1HgDZoSHBvabPJApOFSKWPxNp9BeKDuPKclwEInTgl07ASzKmRxS2qwlYJwksF9c5_iVibpyK6ODHW4oiYSs/s640/abby13th0014.jpg" width="636" /></a></div>
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She has an amazing gift with children and animals - she loves them and they respond to her. It's incredible to watch. (There's a list of people waiting for her to turn 14 so she can babysit their kids; she's even been asked to be a birthday party fairy at the end of the year).<br />
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She scrolls the DC Rescue pages almost daily, looking for dogs who need love and she's warned me that "If I EVER find a stray dog, mum, I WILL bring it home."<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgSJE1ImugfPlpV1eJdGopazPsn-PyhCVUIK6uW91EmQWoFk2mxaDzzVuzS1juY5EUDACNsbeccjvriLJA2kuf9XWZuySe6PRPJFT3ToeleppLzjC-sxBTWzbsN7iI5-boRcvm_-qOe_e0/s1600/gardenfairyparty17.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="Little kids LOVE her" border="0" data-original-height="525" data-original-width="700" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgSJE1ImugfPlpV1eJdGopazPsn-PyhCVUIK6uW91EmQWoFk2mxaDzzVuzS1juY5EUDACNsbeccjvriLJA2kuf9XWZuySe6PRPJFT3ToeleppLzjC-sxBTWzbsN7iI5-boRcvm_-qOe_e0/s1600/gardenfairyparty17.JPG" title="Little kids LOVE her" /></a></div>
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As an animal lover she's a bit of an activist, insisting that we switch to cruelty-free household products after researching animal testing for a school project. These days it's Earthwise and Eco Store all the way, and you should see the look I get if I dare to load caged eggs into the shopping trolley. Daggers, I tellya.<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgzc0dNDXHkWy8IBwWSI4Kq4S5VzYDXLGYoiQzEGd0ek7O_TTvYsgb524G2S5OYjByHFE8P_nDrcZsUlL7AAhoP4eJDKhejoBjXH7i8mV14wRFkYsATYpskyDaHXCEmVrYWbHApJSwXZOE/s1600/fostering+buddy0023.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="Animals love her too" border="0" data-original-height="563" data-original-width="750" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgzc0dNDXHkWy8IBwWSI4Kq4S5VzYDXLGYoiQzEGd0ek7O_TTvYsgb524G2S5OYjByHFE8P_nDrcZsUlL7AAhoP4eJDKhejoBjXH7i8mV14wRFkYsATYpskyDaHXCEmVrYWbHApJSwXZOE/s1600/fostering+buddy0023.JPG" title="Animals love her too" /></a></div>
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My girl is hard working and self-motivated; I have never had to nag her to do homework, which is kind of amazing. When she puts her mind to something, she's a force of nature.<br />
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My lovely girl is fun-loving and likes to keep things light. I wanted to throw her a <a href="http://www.greatfun4kidsblog.com/2015/11/a-coming-of-age-celebration-turning-13.html" target="_blank">13th birthday celebration like what we did for Dash</a>, but no. <i>"You can throw one, mum," </i>she told me, <i>"but I won't be there." </i>(Nothing deep. nothing that might get a bit intense is allowed).<br />
No amount of wheedling or cajoling would change her mind. She's a girl who knows what she wants and won't be budged; she's been that way since before she could talk.<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEijSJ93s1aqjSbLWBx_uURWjgRSXujW9rMNdbMN4khlhccCLxEuCDQ3R0FnIGZYhypzAVie7i6xo96U-ffuwkbxLdxmENsuXIVVY2KPDJV5ZvI16xfnQjVnUaJpkGeuG4raTsfcc5RJg8A/s1600/13th+birthday+collage+2.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="Hardworking, fun loving, hilarious and BRAVE" border="0" data-original-height="750" data-original-width="750" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEijSJ93s1aqjSbLWBx_uURWjgRSXujW9rMNdbMN4khlhccCLxEuCDQ3R0FnIGZYhypzAVie7i6xo96U-ffuwkbxLdxmENsuXIVVY2KPDJV5ZvI16xfnQjVnUaJpkGeuG4raTsfcc5RJg8A/s1600/13th+birthday+collage+2.jpg" title="Hardworking, fun loving, hilarious and BRAVE" width="750" /></a></div>
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So no <a href="http://www.greatfun4kidsblog.com/2015/11/a-coming-of-age-celebration-turning-13.html" target="_blank">13th"bat-mitzvah-type" scenario</a> for this one.<br />
Just a fire night with a few friends, and a couple to sleep over. That's It.<br />
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I was lucky she let me even do a bit of fancy decorating. "Not a themed party, mum! OK???"<br />
I managed to convince her to let me make it a bit pretty, a bit of "starry night" decor. but nothing too much.<br />
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Here's a collection of some of my girls' most iconic blog posts, illustrating the personality that we have been blessed with in her.<br />
<h2>
CLASSIC "MISS FAB" STORIES - THROUGH THE YEARS</h2>
<ul>
<li><a href="http://www.greatfun4kidsblog.com/2016/04/how-to-host-pop-up-cafe-in-your-garden.html" target="_blank">How to Host a PopUp Cafe in Your Garden</a></li>
<li><a href="http://www.greatfun4kidsblog.com/2016/02/a-ubiquitous-post-about-change-new.html" target="_blank">A Post about Change, New Schools and Time Flying</a></li>
<li><a href="http://www.greatfun4kidsblog.com/2015/11/cheer-up.html" target="_blank">Cheer up: A post about Cheerleading and why we love it</a></li>
<li><a href="http://www.greatfun4kidsblog.com/2015/02/home-diy-room-to-grow-with.html" target="_blank">A Room to Grow With (Bedroom Makeover 2.0)</a></li>
<li><a href="http://www.greatfun4kidsblog.com/2010/07/girly-bedroom-makeover.html" target="_blank">Girly Bedroom Makeover (Bedroom 1.0)</a></li>
<li><a href="http://www.greatfun4kidsblog.com/2014/03/the-life-and-times-of-action-girl.html" target="_blank">The Life and Times of Action Girl</a></li>
<li><a href="http://www.greatfun4kidsblog.com/2014/01/of-garden-parties-girlies-and-great.html" target="_blank">Of Garden Parties, Girls, and Great Expectations</a></li>
<li><a href="http://www.greatfun4kidsblog.com/2012/09/postcard-from-china.html" target="_blank">Postcard from China - A Mother-Daughter Travel Adventure</a></li>
<li><a href="http://www.greatfun4kidsblog.com/2013/04/the-diva-ishness-of-daughters.html" target="_blank">The Diva-ishness of Daughters</a></li>
<li><a href="http://www.greatfun4kidsblog.com/2012/09/miss-fab-saves-bear.html" target="_blank">Miss Fab Saves a Bear</a></li>
<li><a href="http://www.greatfun4kidsblog.com/2012/04/stuff-you-learn-at-skatepark.html" target="_blank">Stuff You Learn at a Skate Park (aka Miss Fab takes on a Bully)</a></li>
<li><a href="http://l/" target="_blank">Anatomy of a Winner</a></li>
<li><a href="http://www.greatfun4kidsblog.com/2010/05/climb.html" target="_blank">The Climb</a></li>
<li><a href="http://www.greatfun4kidsblog.com/2010/09/wordless-wednesday-notes-to-self.html" target="_blank">Notes to Self</a></li>
<li><a href="http://www.greatfun4kidsblog.com/2010/06/fabulous-darling.html" target="_blank">Fabulous, Darling!</a></li>
<li><a href="http://www.greatfun4kidsblog.com/2009/05/wordless-wednesday-hair-today-gone.html" target="_blank">Hair Today, Gone Tomorrow (That time she cut her own hair)</a></li>
<li><a href="http://www.greatfun4kidsblog.com/2009/04/wordless-wednesday-loved-to-bits.html" target="_blank">Loved to Bits</a></li>
<li><a href="http://www.greatfun4kidsblog.com/2008/09/wardrobe-wars.html" target="_blank">Wardrobe Wars</a></li>
</ul>
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And to top it all off, here are her birthday parties through the years - after all it was her 4th birthday that launched this blog nine years ago.<br />
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MISS FAB'S FABULOUS BIRTHDAY PARTIES THROUGH THE YEARS</h2>
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<a href="http://www.greatfun4kidsblog.com/2008/08/fairy-party.html" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="Fairy Party" border="0" data-original-height="600" data-original-width="800" height="300" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhT9L7B7OEAngp36zJvkbddmbE5_g1SU3hIca776c2bdAobQwYclge1n0xyOq8VQVz0-2ynsO09iDsNyE2d4sNdfPXycJewjfYnC8FlxiMeCNyTxKThaoogedMWAcjJAQmjHzaJALTPSgw/s400/fairy+party+title+3.jpg" title="Fairy Party" width="400" /></a></div>
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<a href="http://www.greatfun4kidsblog.com/2009/07/wordless-wednesday-having-ball.html" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="Royal Ball" border="0" data-original-height="563" data-original-width="750" height="300" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEihy7BaxhrSaDww8CbUNIk5JkXTxAsiMYhU0oaHp31qNN8fkM6lkQHZKoXR0IrtKtWuSEiQz3E9mtuRlIjaxTGbt_9n6HV6UZxsMtwBTfrNeCZpAeWEqW5XNhyL6hutwfd6UtAcLcmTMh4/s400/Royal+Ball+title+3.jpg" title="Royal Ball" width="400" /></a></div>
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<a href="http://www.greatfun4kidsblog.com/2010/08/rather-fancy-party.html" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="6th Birthday Fancy Nancy Party" border="0" data-original-height="561" data-original-width="700" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgGAqk-yzCwTENgRnM66RMmKYvFr8AgjsFdnOVvz7Rn1cOs3mDpIs7xFOpI-uOK_LO6TKezhiqJJpLyTVhcZlj-ZtojSmUNb4Dw0vJn5CL7vo4c7VAwzvqeqsj9E9KbTaJB5iixW56A0i0/s400/a+fancy+nancy+party.jpg" title="6th Birthday Fancy Nancy Party" width="400" /></a></div>
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<a href="http://www.greatfun4kidsblog.com/2011/08/tangled-party.html" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="7th birthday Tangled Party" border="0" data-original-height="568" data-original-width="750" height="302" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgyWDs7GyOCjmYFCIyK5oN-9uX2_G6m6BdS9TZmPhsqbKkK1ce3gZYCPF0MJCNZFa_PhzRLCxYKPDexJ9s9759wdSq42tncphdt10c1HO-vFN_A3BbvtpDtvEDd4XVuuf2HVfr1fCvIGu0/s400/tangled+party+title.JPG" title="7th birthday Tangled Party" width="400" /></a></div>
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<a href="http://www.greatfun4kidsblog.com/2012/07/a-brilliant-baking-birthday-party.html" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="8th Birthday Baking Party" border="0" data-original-height="525" data-original-width="700" height="300" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjN111THKj3OvPQOtZlXnhzd4CB-z3u90WK7cGgjwsZ27GINJByM4anI8sC4eicpr7w2N3IZDJn_1gxxaaPwVvT-5EgExjGG-vknyxqTYmR-MEay-72vACN9XVKx4woHPRXctm-tAaRlNw/s400/a+brilliant+baking+birthday.jpg" title="8th Birthday Baking Party" width="400" /></a><a href="http://www.greatfun4kidsblog.com/2013/07/snowflakes-skating-ice-princess-party.html" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="9th Birthday Skating & Snowflakes Party" border="0" data-original-height="525" data-original-width="700" height="300" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjy_pszd_l28beic_4QvJsV5gpYIgrqCjWyoRwSwWmf4oRE2veH6vPxQMoLQyuVcgXhA-ndyMOsajPR1uzSj9ShvsM3VFXgwa3WqI7SjpgGUKK0cJVRc9oTup2fPqoC8z2HRS2IN2vjIcE/s400/a+winter+wonderland+party.jpg" title="9th Birthday Skating & Snowflakes Party" width="400" /></a></div>
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<a href="http://www.greatfun4kidsblog.com/2014/07/girly-sleepover-party-goes-off.html" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="10th Birthday Girly Sleepover" border="0" data-original-height="561" data-original-width="700" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEilZDduSrKmCwMDomBhoeolJLc99NHTe9vYw9o9Jp0k4540gifgblA-fsKhEwA45MXCLnfWCCiYSzOYFvl4axq9OS_2X9v58JglT0L4mgM8AMP_DUX37YF-om6fk3uyiuTPn4kuTHkSJrQ/s400/a+fabulous+girly+sleepover+pary.jpg" title="10th Birthday Girly Sleepover" width="400" /></a></div>
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<a href="http://www.greatfun4kidsblog.com/2015/07/la-cafe-de-paris-party-cest-magnifique.html" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="11th Birthday Paris Party" border="0" data-original-height="579" data-original-width="750" height="308" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiW3Tochl8misUzEksVTK5B3LEHTmWQvTxhVAAfOSlSjdlNvLd4gvG2fuTJzGjqPfKWZezINTdckyfjGb-ESdMCFnULaJhJwa_Fiao0q-JR8j3Sby47auLtvngyFpYC2izmdhNpjBZliaM/s400/Paris+Party+Day+title.jpg" title="11th Birthday Paris Party" width="400" /></a></div>
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<a href="http://www.greatfun4kidsblog.com/2016/08/a-magical-woodland-campfire-party.html" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="12th Birthday Woodland Party" border="0" data-original-height="648" data-original-width="750" height="345" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEifhtI_0K2y8bA_erAqnlwK0Iv2A2VCwrqwZMEtyDM_iTss4OJoIEA40lCgsLI4RaUI1drw47NhXniqPO9Ci6BTnfg6EVFVpufRNRBgmDGKimHbcxv4W-gMGWjnGODj2DQhCtdhjfKFbFA/s400/title+woodland+party.jpg" title="12th Birthday Woodland Party" width="400" /></a></div>
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<span id="goog_733445265"></span><br />
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<span style="font-size: x-large;">Happy 13th Birthday to my Girl</span></div>
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Born on a Wednesday morning, 5.15am</div>
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On the 28th of July 2004.</div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
The world will never be the same.</div>
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Simoneyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09554122579485306611noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4940553413759896971.post-25744075994385927342017-07-06T15:46:00.002+12:002018-04-23T11:44:29.773+12:00A Merry Heart Does You Good (like medicine)<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhLYBYXZDsx4enP-E81-sfZv6BDuUqPrtIRr3U5EIJjvnPOkTteIEwXjzcwVTZMHLXI8InOVXn5M9kkxmUukYSOUfCheSH-yOTq4zerPoBAvjeweR6YWhlsEoZTPRK5O9lxVPAxqIUpsqo/s1600/a+merry+heart+does+you+good.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt=""A Merry Heart Does you GOOD (like a Medicine)"" border="0" data-original-height="563" data-original-width="750" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhLYBYXZDsx4enP-E81-sfZv6BDuUqPrtIRr3U5EIJjvnPOkTteIEwXjzcwVTZMHLXI8InOVXn5M9kkxmUukYSOUfCheSH-yOTq4zerPoBAvjeweR6YWhlsEoZTPRK5O9lxVPAxqIUpsqo/s1600/a+merry+heart+does+you+good.jpg" title=""A Merry Heart Does you GOOD (like a Medicine)"" /></a></div>
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If you've been around this blog for any length of time you'll know that in our family we've always loved to celebrate for any excuse – and sometimes for no reason.<br />
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We loved having friends over, spending time with special people enjoying an occasion together. Whether it was a <a href="http://www.greatfun4kidsblog.com/2010/10/our-bright-light-party.html" style="font-family: inherit;" target="_blank"><span style="background: white; color: #000402;">Light
Party</span></a><span style="background: white; color: #5d5c5c; font-family: inherit;">, a <a href="http://www.greatfun4kidsblog.com/search/label/Parties" target="_blank">Birthday Party</a>, </span><a href="http://www.greatfun4kidsblog.com/2009/04/guess-whos-coming-to-dinner.html" style="font-family: inherit;" target="_blank"><span style="background: white; color: #000402;">an Easter
dinner</span></a><span style="background: white; color: #5d5c5c; font-family: inherit;"> or one of our famous </span><span style="background: white; color: #000402; font-family: inherit;"><a href="http://www.greatfun4kidsblog.com/search/label/Impromptu%20Parties" target="_blank">"Parties for No Reason"</a></span><span style="background: white; color: #5d5c5c; font-family: inherit;">, </span>we sure did love to host a gathering.<br />
We never spent loads of money, we never parted with cash for glitzy entertainers or fancy catering.<br />
We liked our birthday cakes a bit wobbly and homemade-looking.<br />
We got a kick out of thinking up decorations, games and food that we could adapt and make.</div>
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More than anything, we really got a thrill out of creating an atmosphere for our friends to come and enjoy.<br />
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Even the planning was part of the fun.<br />
As the kids got older they came up with their own great ideas for games and decorating.<br />
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Celebrating each other was a way of showing appreciation and letting each family member know that they were valued and special.<br />
So what happened when we changed to a sole-parent family on a tight budget?</div>
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<a name='more'></a><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEix5Soh2Y0IQDb8x7X6wZE9IXJqB6kpt3Xl6cLqCltAgoSyT1DmKESxzDNKD0UeKYDWqtBOJPYUwJRmNWveohfWDt57x7MENoxxjdnorAke_xpJPGZrDpGv6xxEJ93GFvXCB7Og9ub1SJY/s1600/a+merry+heart0016.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em; text-align: center;"><img alt="We whipped up this impromptu garden party one summer in half an hour on a sunny day" border="0" data-original-height="563" data-original-width="750" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEix5Soh2Y0IQDb8x7X6wZE9IXJqB6kpt3Xl6cLqCltAgoSyT1DmKESxzDNKD0UeKYDWqtBOJPYUwJRmNWveohfWDt57x7MENoxxjdnorAke_xpJPGZrDpGv6xxEJ93GFvXCB7Og9ub1SJY/s1600/a+merry+heart0016.JPG" title="We whipped up this impromptu garden party one summer in half an hour on a sunny day" /></a><br />
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Sure things slowed down a bit; there was no <a href="http://www.greatfun4kidsblog.com/2010/10/our-bright-light-party.html" target="_blank">Bright Light/Welcome Summer BBQ</a> or <a href="http://www.greatfun4kidsblog.com/2011/01/happy-new-year-blah-blah-blah.html" target="_blank">New Years Eve Bash</a> here (hosting crowds might have been put into the too-hard basket for a bit). But essentially, when it comes to celebrating each other, we are still open for business. <br />
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For us, Parties and Celebrations are a must.<br />
They are a highlight, a bright spot – a peak in what can sometimes feel like a long year of valleys.<br />
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"A merry heart does you good, like medicine," the Proverb says. And it really does.<br />
When things are feeling grim and heavy, throw a party (even if it’s just you and your kids) and see if that doesn't perk you all up.<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhTJySyZOyYXf0Oc4KniURildq9-4vFEuQ82Dwjzibr31r-p1eQlmR4_oU1RwvqZbnoh4q6xw-nz0XlH0bW3c3AUVdyvjUj5n-gmLs0WWA9tlLL4hd86axyKLErcu0favl0IpL8kkJ2dcc/s1600/a+merry+heart30005.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="The pretty china cups and teapot plus a scones with jam n cream made this into a tea party" border="0" data-original-height="662" data-original-width="750" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhTJySyZOyYXf0Oc4KniURildq9-4vFEuQ82Dwjzibr31r-p1eQlmR4_oU1RwvqZbnoh4q6xw-nz0XlH0bW3c3AUVdyvjUj5n-gmLs0WWA9tlLL4hd86axyKLErcu0favl0IpL8kkJ2dcc/s1600/a+merry+heart30005.JPG" title="The pretty china cups and teapot plus a scones with jam n cream made this into a tea party" /></a>
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One of my life’s mottoes is “Don’t save the best china for a special occasion – use the best china and make today special.” I try to live by it - bringing out my pretty teacups when friends pop by and making every cuppa a bit of an occasion.<br />
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Celebrations don't have to involve crowds of people or weeks of planning. Sometimes an impromptu "party for no reason" with a friend or two can brighten up a dull or disastrous week.<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiLwjbQupzrh_k2e_L3e9Zbbzlmeej8WXSLvql-jyhNBKMa7992yTvHtfWX5qvSYhpp_ysPdM2rzCycxjAhT5oR7oHOFml-Kt5HGjIwhJIf1cU7Fw2wgP9nrxUYCbnv6W65BwpbIPyZoJM/s1600/a+merry+heart0003.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="Cupcakes "whipped up"" border="0" data-original-height="630" data-original-width="750" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiLwjbQupzrh_k2e_L3e9Zbbzlmeej8WXSLvql-jyhNBKMa7992yTvHtfWX5qvSYhpp_ysPdM2rzCycxjAhT5oR7oHOFml-Kt5HGjIwhJIf1cU7Fw2wgP9nrxUYCbnv6W65BwpbIPyZoJM/s1600/a+merry+heart0003.JPG" title="Cupcakes "whipped up"" /></a></div>
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We got into the habit of impromptu parties many years ago when the kids were little. It takes half an hour to whip up a batch of <span style="font-family: inherit;"><a href="http://www.greatfun4kidsblog.com/2012/01/cupcakes-for-everyone.html" style="background-color: white;" target="_blank"><span style="color: #000402; text-decoration-line: none;">Cupcakes</span></a><span style="background-color: white; color: #5d5c5c;">, and </span><a href="http://www.greatfun4kidsblog.com/2012/01/impromptu-garden-party.html" style="background-color: white;" target="_blank"><span style="color: #000402; text-decoration-line: none;">set up a pretty table</span></a><span style="background-color: white; color: #5d5c5c;">. </span></span>We'd raid the cupboards for fruit to chop, popcorn to pop and marshmallows to make it a bit festive. Sometimes we'd call on friends and invite them to join us; sometimes we'd party on our own. These days we turn on music and dance with the dog (or light a fire to sizzle sausages and toast marshmallows).<br />
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<span style="font-family: inherit;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgtAaUeds6oIRRJnrkGa5NNPDqlX2p7IUCrBSPsiJefL9jyscCbV8qdP1QwzOMgQy2QDbxcin40VIuPkuffUYbObLDifwCZ_kHkUPFvZYoWUSJIA14FPUKutTMcKareU76jKv5BgzwBqpg/s1600/a+merry+heart30019.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="An impromptu party we threw for Scrag's friends at Christmas" border="0" data-original-height="563" data-original-width="750" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgtAaUeds6oIRRJnrkGa5NNPDqlX2p7IUCrBSPsiJefL9jyscCbV8qdP1QwzOMgQy2QDbxcin40VIuPkuffUYbObLDifwCZ_kHkUPFvZYoWUSJIA14FPUKutTMcKareU76jKv5BgzwBqpg/s1600/a+merry+heart30019.JPG" title="An impromptu party we threw for Scrag's friends at Christmas" /></a></span>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi0MoRqZOrNrdDOEfhyphenhyphenznH9VhXiFFg8QIi-1qOCLFFJs6_Gn6o-bfMSFqnx-z3tDRNHsKgCdYdNh4mZ9R_phBNhaXMfotMLouwEhGAosagc8PhR8ZNHEiloAIOv929FIGFaGiWOjp2WhBg/s1600/a+merry+heart30021.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="We cheated with bought-in supermarket cupcakes, chips, chopped fruit and sausage rolls - they loved it" border="0" data-original-height="563" data-original-width="750" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi0MoRqZOrNrdDOEfhyphenhyphenznH9VhXiFFg8QIi-1qOCLFFJs6_Gn6o-bfMSFqnx-z3tDRNHsKgCdYdNh4mZ9R_phBNhaXMfotMLouwEhGAosagc8PhR8ZNHEiloAIOv929FIGFaGiWOjp2WhBg/s1600/a+merry+heart30021.JPG" title="We cheated with bought-in supermarket cupcakes, chips, chopped fruit and sausage rolls - they loved it" /></a></div>
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Impromptu parties are so enjoyable, truly.<br />
Quite often in the school holidays I've been known to invite a couple of mum friends and their kids over, so it’s fun for all of us (kids AND mums). Each family brings food to share ("something festive"). I call it a party, and once you call it a party, it is one.<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhgPd0D_Md2BDOmxauutl7rPfKlGxKfqKf2IxlOYCnlAqH_efWkSufwj_M84s0lu9Mc4TCGTJ70_cGSeSsMonT7n0ZtzawZROh1-qNJp03vYeB1urAmlrbDwrmGuL0gVX1mQ-kudBjRwF0/s1600/a+merry+heart30011.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="I'm really good at lighting fires now..." border="0" data-original-height="563" data-original-width="750" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhgPd0D_Md2BDOmxauutl7rPfKlGxKfqKf2IxlOYCnlAqH_efWkSufwj_M84s0lu9Mc4TCGTJ70_cGSeSsMonT7n0ZtzawZROh1-qNJp03vYeB1urAmlrbDwrmGuL0gVX1mQ-kudBjRwF0/s1600/a+merry+heart30011.JPG" title="I'm really good at lighting fires now..." /></a></div>
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Sometimes on weekends<span style="background-attachment: initial; background-clip: initial; background-image: initial; background-origin: initial; background-position: initial; background-repeat: initial; background-size: initial; color: #5d5c5c;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="background-color: white;"> </span><a href="http://www.greatfun4kidsblog.com/2015/07/nights-of-fire-and-marshmallows.html" style="background-color: white;" target="_blank">we light a fire outdoors</a><span style="background-color: white;">,</span></span></span> invite our friends and/or cousins to share sausages cooked over the flames and toast marshmallows. We<span style="background-attachment: initial; background-clip: initial; background-image: initial; background-origin: initial; background-position: initial; background-repeat: initial; background-size: initial; color: #5d5c5c;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="background-color: white;"> </span><a href="http://www.greatfun4kidsblog.com/2015/07/nights-of-fire-and-marshmallows.html" style="background-color: white;" target="_blank">play games around the fire</a><span style="background-color: white;"> <o:p></o:p></span></span></span>and stay up far too late.
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<ul>
<li><a href="http://www.greatfun4kidsblog.com/2015/07/nights-of-fire-and-marshmallows.html" target="_blank"><span style="font-family: inherit;">Circles and Triangles</span></a></li>
<li><a href="http://www.greatfun4kidsblog.com/2013/08/family-fun-cowboy-cookout-with-truth-or.html" target="_blank"><span style="font-family: inherit;">Spin the Bottle Truth Or Dare</span></a></li>
</ul>
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I actually didn't realise how often over the past year I'd thrown an impromptu party or afternoon tea until I came to look for photos for this story and found evidence of random fire nights, tea parties and pancake breakfasts in my stash. (Last year was a bit of a blur!) These mini-celebrations turned ordinary/blah days into something a bit special. Those fun moments helped get us through the year.<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj7AyJKPIeruiIXeOfzd7CwrC6PxQT32Y3FvPiuRnx7oAebiulFKF6eijZoWJZv7wvmaSDSjI6IuS3mhugxKHkyFnTabQ6jlZq1dCQcAJDf8X01rI2b6sQwh_CtbCAgS6tr82vO4HPPb-o/s1600/a+merry+heart0002.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em; text-align: center;"><img border="0" data-original-height="563" data-original-width="750" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj7AyJKPIeruiIXeOfzd7CwrC6PxQT32Y3FvPiuRnx7oAebiulFKF6eijZoWJZv7wvmaSDSjI6IuS3mhugxKHkyFnTabQ6jlZq1dCQcAJDf8X01rI2b6sQwh_CtbCAgS6tr82vO4HPPb-o/s1600/a+merry+heart0002.JPG" /></a><br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhLKnhJgeeqM8SABV1X3JDglBe-9RleaCJM2Oxa_rTvTOyQzMhzIZVIN0wPjeRxmHwTak_QjhT08a18hnmA5ZB0OJptRQDI-hgW4tTL7I3X4LE30eUM371nQkGBtQmdF-jFppqqEvqNwI4/s1600/a+merry+heart0027.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="Happy birthday to me too (a firenight with friends and food)" border="0" data-original-height="563" data-original-width="750" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhLKnhJgeeqM8SABV1X3JDglBe-9RleaCJM2Oxa_rTvTOyQzMhzIZVIN0wPjeRxmHwTak_QjhT08a18hnmA5ZB0OJptRQDI-hgW4tTL7I3X4LE30eUM371nQkGBtQmdF-jFppqqEvqNwI4/s1600/a+merry+heart0027.JPG" title="Happy birthday to me too (a firenight with friends and food)" /></a></div>
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There's a verse somewhere that says, "The joy of the Lord is your strength" (another true saying). There's something to be said for throwing a "party" and having a laugh with friends/family to give you strength for the journey, no matter how long and winding your year might be.
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Back at the beginning of May, Scrag requested that we celebrate<span style="background-color: white; color: #5d5c5c; font-family: inherit;"> </span><a href="http://www.greatfun4kidsblog.com/2015/05/may-4th-be-with-you-last-minute-star.html" style="background-color: white; font-family: inherit;" target="_blank">May the Fourth (Be With You) </a>aka International Star Wars Day. It had been a while since we'd done a theme dinner, but I loved that he thought of it and said, <i>why not?</i>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgpWjxewPUHppLUMzj9vs7A9jN0v_5PKBRFlPGxYDrBPiKW8qCfa_-a7oFGfeaLJ7fWi97QH3RoJQR4iBuF1Ot3ZkdiziqlXhdrl7_2bMgeSIHbRh6ZRhAZYX_5Wt-cct61lsJX2g3eirI/s1600/a+merry+heart0007.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="563" data-original-width="750" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgpWjxewPUHppLUMzj9vs7A9jN0v_5PKBRFlPGxYDrBPiKW8qCfa_-a7oFGfeaLJ7fWi97QH3RoJQR4iBuF1Ot3ZkdiziqlXhdrl7_2bMgeSIHbRh6ZRhAZYX_5Wt-cct61lsJX2g3eirI/s1600/a+merry+heart0007.JPG" /></a></div>
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With half a day's notice I whipped up some <a href="http://www.greatfun4kidsblog.com/p/printables.html" target="_blank">"Jedi Juice" printables </a>for a couple of bottles of budget lemonade, dragged out the wigs and masks, hung up bunting from parties-past and ordered a bunch of $5 pizzas. Somewhere I found a packet of unused glow-sticks and turned them into mini light sabers with silver duct tape. I transformed the el-cheapo pizzas into themed fare by changing the logo with a vivid marker to "Pizza the Hutt". <br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjXVb8Q1BvniSDsm36u1alIn-tbTqFq-yF3TI9eYIho-eTAymqASmiK-J53W6uroDZE4byb2dce2enIhK94VkQa7qilZUMRDWT9G-AyziVEAQpk5BjIbZ-CQ0_f3PS6nQkcDmvM0yqi9XM/s1600/a+merry+heart0006.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt=""Pizza the Hutt"" border="0" data-original-height="563" data-original-width="750" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjXVb8Q1BvniSDsm36u1alIn-tbTqFq-yF3TI9eYIho-eTAymqASmiK-J53W6uroDZE4byb2dce2enIhK94VkQa7qilZUMRDWT9G-AyziVEAQpk5BjIbZ-CQ0_f3PS6nQkcDmvM0yqi9XM/s1600/a+merry+heart0006.JPG" title=""Pizza the Hutt"" /></a>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjNSgZ39wZQz7R8gtlWOZ77GqwDEtmbIFZetuZ0YYZFTzwmbnzx25W9UALOHSnsL57pNETbJkfP1Cy46JfS5ubIayVBGjQKPkM1p4U1iu3jSCiH8TrRbdssgdZZU3O1XFCFfCulDJv6RTY/s1600/a+merry+heart0008.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="Yoda (me) and Sophie (our French homestay)" border="0" data-original-height="563" data-original-width="750" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjNSgZ39wZQz7R8gtlWOZ77GqwDEtmbIFZetuZ0YYZFTzwmbnzx25W9UALOHSnsL57pNETbJkfP1Cy46JfS5ubIayVBGjQKPkM1p4U1iu3jSCiH8TrRbdssgdZZU3O1XFCFfCulDJv6RTY/s1600/a+merry+heart0008.JPG" title="Yoda (me) and Sophie (our French homestay)" /></a></div>
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And voila! A last minute theme dinner to brighten up our night/week/month. We all had a great night; Sophie, our French homestay, loved it (that's her with Yoda, aka <i>moi</i>), though <a href="http://www.greatfun4kidsblog.com/2016/07/hello-its-me-and-clyde-puppy.html" target="_blank">Clyde the giant Rescue Puppy </a>was not so sure about his role as Princess Leia....?<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhtsdlZCH86KmfoJFEfYsRQlc_QkTBs-CWdCn0IPWbEyPaFurmHm69PvhKsT1lYipQsINBd-ZiMlO42nuDCMSEXfnqbdpnqhgb0CWput-OI4dxnHUJvdvhoA7eZR_eVd9aq39TbG6hWvDE/s1600/a+merry+heart0013.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em; text-align: center;"><img alt="Princess Leia-dog" border="0" data-original-height="563" data-original-width="750" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhtsdlZCH86KmfoJFEfYsRQlc_QkTBs-CWdCn0IPWbEyPaFurmHm69PvhKsT1lYipQsINBd-ZiMlO42nuDCMSEXfnqbdpnqhgb0CWput-OI4dxnHUJvdvhoA7eZR_eVd9aq39TbG6hWvDE/s1600/a+merry+heart0013.JPG" title="Princess Leia-dog" /></a><br />
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A birthday party need take no more work than this, really.<br />
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Forget the intimidating Pinteresty perfection you see around the interwebs - many of those parties are staged by professionals for photo shoots; they’re not parties for actual human children. <br />
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If you want to do an achievable fun DIY "themed" birthday party, look no further than<span style="color: #5d5c5c; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-language: EN-NZ;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"> <a href="http://www.greatfun4kidsblog.com/p/party-stuff.html" target="_blank">my party index page</a>. </span></span>Every party we've done through the years is there with instructions, recipes and<span style="color: #5d5c5c; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-language: EN-NZ;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><a href="http://www.greatfun4kidsblog.com/p/printables.html" target="_blank"> free printables</a>. </span></span>There's parties for boys and girls of all ages from the 1st birthday right up to the tweens and teens.<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjhtxSHSyNK_qd5yYb6Y8rL12P-INwtzRHjd75sM2zRMc-BOc1JQmnKtOuy5-wvd70vPGH1ood6OflREgkVPf51qp8ZeL5vHtKqpvFK8oreaWH9gdq_8iiAMWet-phCjsQCChF-4r8Ww_I/s1600/a+merry+heart0030.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="14th birthday party with a "cool factor"" border="0" data-original-height="563" data-original-width="750" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjhtxSHSyNK_qd5yYb6Y8rL12P-INwtzRHjd75sM2zRMc-BOc1JQmnKtOuy5-wvd70vPGH1ood6OflREgkVPf51qp8ZeL5vHtKqpvFK8oreaWH9gdq_8iiAMWet-phCjsQCChF-4r8Ww_I/s1600/a+merry+heart0030.JPG" title="14th birthday party with a "cool factor"" /></a>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgQmAP-mPghPGSuERHnxk55-SXQXFOLUZj8R_rvQ7er7M60fjOhHtxC0guzEsqn4XWd_FiEA4qQWTLm3NdyK26KHfDQK61NYJa__8wec0KcqGhAz4VY2qb2miObxuOB72gzWQuK-SSYXZA/s1600/a+merry+heart0035.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="Sports birthday party - the parties are no less fun than they ever were" border="0" data-original-height="563" data-original-width="750" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgQmAP-mPghPGSuERHnxk55-SXQXFOLUZj8R_rvQ7er7M60fjOhHtxC0guzEsqn4XWd_FiEA4qQWTLm3NdyK26KHfDQK61NYJa__8wec0KcqGhAz4VY2qb2miObxuOB72gzWQuK-SSYXZA/s1600/a+merry+heart0035.JPG" title="Sports birthday party - the parties are no less fun than they ever were" /></a></div>
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Now that I'm a single mum on a much-more-limited party budget I make sure to plan well ahead for birthdays. I order things online cheaply from Ali Express and Wish. I trawl through the cupboards and re-use what we already have. I use my imagination and create things from scraps of fabric or in Photoshop to turn basic things into awesome ones. (I also enlist the help of my faithful <a href="http://www.greatfun4kidsblog.com/search/label/KiwiCakes" target="_blank">party partner, KiwiCakes</a> for help with baking supplies so I can share my party inspiration here with all of you).<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjIuTLOipdCw4Rawe_TKM9xApA7YYYU3TYeww2EUF2yL0_GI3aHhyrzYLUv2V5gd40jKgV8yj6xw4r2IKQB6aVcQmY7hNRz6NfgEA_sPy8hNGhJPT8dOXIMxgte1J1XfsFU2eYZNx3NfRk/s1600/a+merry+heart0017.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em; text-align: center;"><img alt="Miss fab's 12th birthday cake - actually made largely by the birthday girl and her friends!" border="0" data-original-height="605" data-original-width="750" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjIuTLOipdCw4Rawe_TKM9xApA7YYYU3TYeww2EUF2yL0_GI3aHhyrzYLUv2V5gd40jKgV8yj6xw4r2IKQB6aVcQmY7hNRz6NfgEA_sPy8hNGhJPT8dOXIMxgte1J1XfsFU2eYZNx3NfRk/s1600/a+merry+heart0017.JPG" title="Miss fab's 12th birthday cake - actually made largely by the birthday girl and her friends!" /></a>
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After nearly a year of birthdays, there is no perceivable difference in the quality of our birthday celebrations... they are as fun and as imaginative as ever, to suit each kid's desired theme.<br />
<ul>
<li><a href="http://www.greatfun4kidsblog.com/2016/08/a-magical-woodland-campfire-party.html" target="_blank"><span style="font-family: inherit;">Woodland Campfire Party - My girl's beautiful 12th birthday last year</span></a></li>
<li><a href="http://www.greatfun4kidsblog.com/2016/11/how-to-throw-party-for-your-teenager.html" target="_blank"><span style="font-family: inherit;">Easy and "Cool" 14th birthday party (that didn't embarrass my teen)</span></a></li>
<li><a href="http://www.greatfun4kidsblog.com/2017/05/an-action-packed-sports-party-with.html" target="_blank"><span style="font-family: inherit;">Action-packed Sports Party for the 9-year-old Sport Nut</span></a></li>
</ul>
Right now I'm planning Miss Fab's 13th - a Starry Night theme, where we'll be toasting marshmallows and playing games round the fire, then heading up Mt Albert to let off sky lanterns. (I'm really really good at lighting fires these days).<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEia0A9llUo40OudHQWtw1DtHMAZ3XLNTgX79YkDCMpZBe9aE_035SAWWEZL0wJZp2gNc7z5UydhfCWwqD4Ugd4spkpPQseuFj9k35rNb9fdFm6UFa3J7GgFHQpbNeSV-c_D1faEdRsjpWQ/s1600/a+merry+heart0020.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="Friends make all the difference when hosting a party on your own" border="0" data-original-height="610" data-original-width="750" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEia0A9llUo40OudHQWtw1DtHMAZ3XLNTgX79YkDCMpZBe9aE_035SAWWEZL0wJZp2gNc7z5UydhfCWwqD4Ugd4spkpPQseuFj9k35rNb9fdFm6UFa3J7GgFHQpbNeSV-c_D1faEdRsjpWQ/s1600/a+merry+heart0020.JPG" title="Friends make all the difference when hosting a party on your own" /></a><br />
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<a href="http://www.greatfun4kidsblog.com/2009/07/wordless-wednesday-having-ball.html" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"></a>As much as I love to create an atmosphere and set a theme, the most important thing is not the decor - it's the celebration.<br />
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When it comes to birthdays, what matters is making an effort to let someone know they are a special and valued member of the family, that they are loved and appreciated. celebrated and honoured. <br />
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When it comes to the everyday humdrum of life, sometimes it does wonders for your family's spirits to take an ordinary day and turn it into something a bit special, giving everyone a boost.<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEit8Y0CVASE1OpdYzu2IsGAzwmJjJajM2t3fPtiC-IWCTWNCDHFTPo6aUZcFhCR-eo0DnMfvG5Y_9awqQ878WJAOjxo5pGviARQQTs3XFFBEXLPvJ4em_WUi2Cw-HiFK2j_eGT1WzfdP3E/s1600/a+merry+heart0001.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="Light a fire in an aluminium drinks bucket and invite friends to toast marshmallows..." border="0" data-original-height="582" data-original-width="746" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEit8Y0CVASE1OpdYzu2IsGAzwmJjJajM2t3fPtiC-IWCTWNCDHFTPo6aUZcFhCR-eo0DnMfvG5Y_9awqQ878WJAOjxo5pGviARQQTs3XFFBEXLPvJ4em_WUi2Cw-HiFK2j_eGT1WzfdP3E/s1600/a+merry+heart0001.jpg" title="Light a fire in an aluminium drinks bucket and invite friends to toast marshmallows..." /></a></div>
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If you’re having a rough week/month/year throwing a party for no reason might be the very thing you need to boost your spirits.<br />
You'd be surprised at how easy it is.<br />
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This is why we party: <i>it's medicine for our souls.</i><br />
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<h2>
<o:p><span style="font-family: inherit;">OUR IMPROMPTU PARTIES & FIRE NIGHT FUN</span></o:p></h2>
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<ul><span style="font-family: inherit;">
<li><a href="http://www.greatfun4kidsblog.com/2012/01/impromptu-garden-party.html"><span style="font-family: inherit;">Impromptu Garden Party</span></a></li>
<li><a href="http://www.greatfun4kidsblog.com/2012/10/legoparty.html"><span style="font-family: inherit;">School Holiday Impromptu Lego Party</span></a></li>
<li><a href="http://www.greatfun4kidsblog.com/2014/07/school-holiday-fun-book-party-with-free.html"><span style="font-family: inherit;">Book Party (school holidays)</span></a></li>
<li><a href="http://www.greatfun4kidsblog.com/2014/10/a-garden-fairy-party-just-because.html"><span style="font-family: inherit;">Garden Fairy Party *Just because*</span></a></li>
<li><a href="http://www.greatfun4kidsblog.com/2014/10/star-wars-party-just-because.html">Star Wars Party *Just Because*</a></li>
<li><a href="http://www.greatfun4kidsblog.com/2009/04/guess-whos-coming-to-dinner.html"><span style="font-family: inherit;">Easter Theme Dinner</span></a></li>
<li><a href="http://www.greatfun4kidsblog.com/2015/05/may-4th-be-with-you-last-minute-star.html" target="_blank"><span style="font-family: inherit;">Star Wars Theme Dinner (May the 4th)</span></a></li>
<li><a href="http://www.greatfun4kidsblog.com/2013/08/family-fun-cowboy-cookout-with-truth-or.html"><span style="font-family: inherit;">Cowboy Cookout with 'Truth or Dare'</span></a></li>
<li><a href="http://www.greatfun4kidsblog.com/2015/07/nights-of-fire-and-marshmallows.html" target="_blank">Nights of Fire & Marshmallows</a></li>
<li><a href="http://www.greatfun4kidsblog.com/2015/10/confessions-of-lazy-mother-party-edition.html" target="_blank">Confessions of a Lazy Mother - Party Edition</a></li>
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Simoneyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09554122579485306611noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4940553413759896971.post-47512325913288902212017-05-26T16:47:00.000+12:002020-03-31T19:15:37.413+13:00An Action Packed Sports Party - with Bubble Soccer<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiMnABNeXWiT23oduaPDmiCYDpkCwD0o2VCcgU-sUTMjRQwGqKGFGWocJhGL4ODKMXpTEe0EcImKlqxSwge_ef3V7LFuCmdIO8HRBaDeGzyNV9iHGyp-RdF84KqmIar0_TuPQ39aV5lhrc/s1600/Action+Packed+Sports+Party+TITLE.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="Action Packed Sports Birthday Party" border="0" data-original-height="750" data-original-width="750" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiMnABNeXWiT23oduaPDmiCYDpkCwD0o2VCcgU-sUTMjRQwGqKGFGWocJhGL4ODKMXpTEe0EcImKlqxSwge_ef3V7LFuCmdIO8HRBaDeGzyNV9iHGyp-RdF84KqmIar0_TuPQ39aV5lhrc/s1600/Action+Packed+Sports+Party+TITLE.jpg" title="Action Packed Sports Birthday Party" /></a></div>
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Scrag turned NINE last month - the boy who was a baby when when this blog began is now an energetic, sports-loving rugby player whose hero is Usain Bolt and who can kick goals and dunk baskets with the best of them.<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhIVzEM0jjEBBCuxnRqCdqI0qgOu1pn9Cqed78Tyy2B22vsRWSA_zsOvVsyUqCJ0i0D7zrn1O2eMYODQB059HgpENVfiMGwcZ2XgH0x1slxL4LgIJW-zleiE5yhSP9reQu_d9cyijzx2wk/s1600/invitation.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="Bumper Ball Sports Party Invitation available on my Etsy Shop" border="0" data-original-height="750" data-original-width="601" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhIVzEM0jjEBBCuxnRqCdqI0qgOu1pn9Cqed78Tyy2B22vsRWSA_zsOvVsyUqCJ0i0D7zrn1O2eMYODQB059HgpENVfiMGwcZ2XgH0x1slxL4LgIJW-zleiE5yhSP9reQu_d9cyijzx2wk/s320/invitation.jpg" title="Bumper Ball Sports Party Invitation available on my Etsy Shop" width="200" /></a>So of course his birthday party had to involve Sports. Action. Running. Competition. BALLS.<br />
The birthday boy helped me plan every detail, from the food to the guest list to the games - there would be very little sitting around for guests at this party!<br />
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With me being not exactly the sportiest of mothers (ahem), I was a bit nervous about running the show (I don't even know the offside rule yet) - until I came across the <a href="http://www.bumperball.co.nz/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">Bumper Ball website</a>, and asked them to help make this party epic by bringing their crazy bubble action to our gig. The birthday boy was delighted when they said yes to partnering with me for this party (and so was I ). Meanwhile, the invited guests were counting down sleeps.<br />
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Here's how the party went....<br />
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<a name='more'></a><h2>
DECORATIONS</h2>
The beginning of the week looked like rain, so I planned to set up the eats inside, hanging <a href="https://www.aliexpress.com/item/NEW-24-National-Team-Flags-String-Football-Flag-Bunting-Strips-For-2016-UEFA-France-Euro-Cup/32671501227.html?spm=2114.13010608.0.0.DL5UK0" target="_blank">flag bunting</a> and setting up the buffet ahead of time. I needn't have bothered, cos on the day the sun was shining and we moved the whole thing back outside.<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhX8FCMmfHYI0unyi7LXOS6rO3RDLvUn1-rIoQJflduVzGgHRRK_SsoXLdVBLzzIlIMC61ro9BQZzxcYYqY9rm-LBKhKy1eZwqg3CVHveqtxyUdxkMsMVQkpXrLi6vNEN1xhSMN34pEVNE/s1600/Sports+Party+Decor+Collage+2.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="Sports Party Setup - Our Homemade Gym" border="0" data-original-height="1071" data-original-width="750" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhX8FCMmfHYI0unyi7LXOS6rO3RDLvUn1-rIoQJflduVzGgHRRK_SsoXLdVBLzzIlIMC61ro9BQZzxcYYqY9rm-LBKhKy1eZwqg3CVHveqtxyUdxkMsMVQkpXrLi6vNEN1xhSMN34pEVNE/s1600/Sports+Party+Decor+Collage+2.jpg" title="Sports Party Setup - Our Homemade Gym" /></a></div>
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We'd decided to set up our outdoor covered area as a "gym" where the guests could "work out" when they arrived. I created a logo ("Jono's Gym" based on "Gold's Gym") in Photoshop for signage which helped create the atmosphere. We dragged the treadmill and rowing machine out of the garage, set up a weights area and borrowed some boxing gloves for the punching bag. The gym was a huge hit.<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhxGuiUoOWR4jqcMKJtxaimXIEoo3alSuaalVuhuyWgpY7UZDPjfvMWGCcOlFwhTDV2Uk3ANFAUdct-4b-HLhrj4cgWRgOReGwY0owaJiF-nHRUKay518S3l91OMAGA0osdxSXuonGzI9k/s1600/SportsParty0212.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="Dude, spot me???" border="0" data-original-height="563" data-original-width="750" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhxGuiUoOWR4jqcMKJtxaimXIEoo3alSuaalVuhuyWgpY7UZDPjfvMWGCcOlFwhTDV2Uk3ANFAUdct-4b-HLhrj4cgWRgOReGwY0owaJiF-nHRUKay518S3l91OMAGA0osdxSXuonGzI9k/s1600/SportsParty0212.JPG" title="Dude, spot me???" /></a></div>
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Reusing bunting from parties past, and adding some more <a href="https://www.aliexpress.com/item/NEW-24-National-Team-Flags-String-Football-Flag-Bunting-Strips-For-2016-UEFA-France-Euro-Cup/32671501227.html?spm=2114.13010608.0.0.DL5UK0" target="_blank">European flag bunting</a> (<a href="https://www.aliexpress.com/item/NEW-24-National-Team-Flags-String-Football-Flag-Bunting-Strips-For-2016-UEFA-France-Euro-Cup/32671501227.html?spm=2114.13010608.0.0.DL5UK0" target="_blank">super cheap from Ali Express</a>) made the whole thing very festive.<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgR639HbAO75cmzjfXQbfSDsmcPU7Pj2COX53Lw-14WIy-x3CEaUnq3Aqag_D5v2NFPPdxYiXEIZ83_7DFTJSehgZiVll-9ocrJO248gT7Gnx1tH1AhjLmxg69Cx_gRSd_GI2t5WcvhsTw/s1600/Sports+party+decor+collage+1.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="Sports Party Setup and decor" border="0" data-original-height="1071" data-original-width="750" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgR639HbAO75cmzjfXQbfSDsmcPU7Pj2COX53Lw-14WIy-x3CEaUnq3Aqag_D5v2NFPPdxYiXEIZ83_7DFTJSehgZiVll-9ocrJO248gT7Gnx1tH1AhjLmxg69Cx_gRSd_GI2t5WcvhsTw/s1600/Sports+party+decor+collage+1.jpg" title="Sports Party Setup and decor" /></a></div>
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I created a football (soccer) field table cover from a $2 plastic table cloth and white electrical tape. It would have been even cuter if I'd realised <a href="http://www.kiwicakes.co.nz/kiwi/seasonal-easter-grass-tablecover-plastic-p-3824.html" target="_blank">Kiwicakes have these amazing grass tablecoths </a>available...<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiK0w-uT9i1Rvt0YJMyuXUAIy79v0b3-H_dIXzDwDv1CufE68w4vwayTzuR2E4slTSJv2K5NzOf3ps2easePFQaEBFqpARuRM7cKG_54buulHeamvtfgexIUvk2aYjSw9ROxbhA39KKxWQ/s1600/soccer+field+table+cover.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="Easy soccer field table cover made with white electrical tape" border="0" data-original-height="331" data-original-width="750" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiK0w-uT9i1Rvt0YJMyuXUAIy79v0b3-H_dIXzDwDv1CufE68w4vwayTzuR2E4slTSJv2K5NzOf3ps2easePFQaEBFqpARuRM7cKG_54buulHeamvtfgexIUvk2aYjSw9ROxbhA39KKxWQ/s1600/soccer+field+table+cover.jpg" title="Easy soccer field table cover made with white electrical tape" /></a></div>
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...but the kids weren't even looking at the tablecover to be honest - they were looking at the...</div>
<h2>
FOOD</h2>
Food was as sports themed as I could get it. Scrag and I had<a href="https://nz.pinterest.com/simoney/sports-party/" target="_blank"> spent time on Pinterest </a>together getting ideas, and he was very specific about what he wanted. I did my best!<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjenghhq7YNnlBwgPYTT3JPiQDCRYlJdyQFqaSODsdLheW8CQxkVdVfNLjUpEFrURlioGwg9NPmw_pvz_NMBOzORuW-Tkb2bqiz1pivpH-4qe-jS55hEETdsrwry2cE46jv1svAtLZRXkM/s1600/sports+party+food.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="Sports party themed food" border="0" data-original-height="906" data-original-width="750" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjenghhq7YNnlBwgPYTT3JPiQDCRYlJdyQFqaSODsdLheW8CQxkVdVfNLjUpEFrURlioGwg9NPmw_pvz_NMBOzORuW-Tkb2bqiz1pivpH-4qe-jS55hEETdsrwry2cE46jv1svAtLZRXkM/s1600/sports+party+food.jpg" title="Sports party themed food" /></a></div>
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<ul>
<li><b>Sports Ball Cookies: </b>Plain "vanilla wines" topped with a circle of <a href="http://www.kiwicakes.co.nz/kiwi/fondant-and-icings-madame-lou-lou-fondant-italy-100g-madame-lou-lou-fondant-orange-p-12727.html" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">orange or white fondant </a> and turned into soccer balls/basketballs using <a href="http://www.kiwicakes.co.nz/kiwi/advanced_search_result.php?keywords=black+fondant&kiwi=qe1ti70iuo4mjtjilgt61qo0j6&x=0&y=0" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">black fondant</a></li>
<li><b>Sports Ball Cupcakes: </b><a href="http://www.greatfun4kidsblog.com/2012/01/cupcakes-for-everyone.html" target="_blank">Vanilla cupcakes</a> with <a href="http://www.greatfun4kidsblog.com/2015/03/the-cake-escape-with-bloggers-kiwicakes.html" target="_blank">squiggly buttercream "grass" frosting</a>; sports balls are white Kool Mints (football) and orange Tangy Fruits (basketball); detail is added by drawing with an <a href="http://www.kiwicakes.co.nz/kiwi/colourings---gel-pastes-and-paints-and-powders-edible-marker-pens-gobake-edible-marker-pen-black-p-13222.html" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">edible black marker</a></li>
<li><b>Mini Hotdogs: </b>Small red cocktail sausages (aka "cheerios") inside a par-baked dinner roll with ketchup and a squiggle of mustard on top - the perfect size for party food</li>
<li><b>Basketball Oreo Pops:</b> Made by poking iceblock sticks into Oreo cookies, then dipping each one into melted <a href="http://www.kiwicakes.co.nz/kiwi/chocolate-supplies-chocolate-melts-for-moulding-orange-candy-melts-p-6493.html" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">orange candy melts</a>. (Tip: Melt the "melts" in a china bowl over a pot of boiling water; add canola oil to give a smooth, runny consistency to allow for easy dipping - Mine would have worked better if I'd used <i>real </i>Oreos instead of cheap Wheelies which kept falling apart - but you get the idea).</li>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgkwoaHCISmq88weWRjuGFzdj1jo4VQSwspAsNEA27VJjzLOOgGVG7-_N-dxuNcKzpPRVNgtqeS5kHsKd4Jmo5hT9hFFhGhjvw4gVRIVlMHn36IFT_u5V3DczVb7IS3HS-ANq2oCF6EbG0/s1600/Sports+Party+Food+2.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em; text-align: center;"><img alt="Sports Party themed food - Sports ball cupcakes, cookies and mini hotdogs" border="0" data-original-height="699" data-original-width="750" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgkwoaHCISmq88weWRjuGFzdj1jo4VQSwspAsNEA27VJjzLOOgGVG7-_N-dxuNcKzpPRVNgtqeS5kHsKd4Jmo5hT9hFFhGhjvw4gVRIVlMHn36IFT_u5V3DczVb7IS3HS-ANq2oCF6EbG0/s1600/Sports+Party+Food+2.jpg" title="Sports Party themed food - Sports ball cupcakes, cookies and mini hotdogs" /></a><br />
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We also had...<br />
<ul>
<li>Cheese balls, Doritos and green popcorn</li>
<li>Orange segments (of course) plus some grapes and melon for a bit of healthyness</li>
<li>Sausage rolls (not themed - we just had them because the birthday boy loves them!)</li>
</ul>
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**Cake decorating gear, edible pens, fondant and candy melts all supplied by <a href="http://www.kiwicakes.co.nz/kiwi/index.php" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">Kiwicakes </a></div>
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**Paper straws, cups, napkins, popcorn boxes from <a href="https://www.aliexpress.com/?spm=2114.13010608.0.0.DL5UK0" target="_blank">Ali Express</a> with free shipping</div>
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**Soccer Ball Plates from <a href="http://www.sweetpeaparties.co.nz/shop-online/licensed-partyware/girls-party-themes/soccer-party/Soccer-Lunch-Plate-8pk" target="_blank">here</a></div>
<h2>
DRINKS</h2>
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I was originally planning to just have personalised sipper <a href="https://www.aliexpress.com/item/Newest-Home-Outdoor-Water-Bottles-for-Bicycle-Sports-750ML-Food-Grade-Plastic-Kettle-Water-Bottle-Diameter/32735315451.html?spm=2114.13010608.0.0.DL5UK0" target="_blank">bottles</a> and plenty of water to drink, but Scrag had other ideas, requesting that I make some of my famous soda bottle labels, in the style of PowerAde and stick them on coloured fizzy drinks.Oh well. I figured the kids would probably need the sugar boost with the non-stop activities Scrag had planned for them.... (He was pretty chuffed with how the drinks turned out).</div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjSYL5USFPwNPJIiVoiMYKoUa__TG-4pbLWk0SaljYK4yk1txHCtm_B7UWKL3gONGpmecci1JaQKcawa5E8cN-i99yjM8yysAVgV4RxAWhwoELwpzKxvAVtwtfN9R73lIdgJHq14bEQ0n8/s1600/Powerade+labels.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="Sports Party Drinks Station - fake powerade with homemade labels" border="0" data-original-height="699" data-original-width="750" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjSYL5USFPwNPJIiVoiMYKoUa__TG-4pbLWk0SaljYK4yk1txHCtm_B7UWKL3gONGpmecci1JaQKcawa5E8cN-i99yjM8yysAVgV4RxAWhwoELwpzKxvAVtwtfN9R73lIdgJHq14bEQ0n8/s1600/Powerade+labels.jpg" title="Sports Party Drinks Station - fake powerade with homemade labels" /></a></div>
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We took a box of "Water for everyone" down with us to the local sports ground when it was time for the games. Everyone had their own specially labelled <a href="https://www.aliexpress.com/item/Newest-Home-Outdoor-Water-Bottles-for-Bicycle-Sports-750ML-Food-Grade-Plastic-Kettle-Water-Bottle-Diameter/32735315451.html?spm=2114.13010608.0.0.DL5UK0" target="_blank">sipper bottle</a> to use and take home afterwards (found <a href="https://www.aliexpress.com/item/Newest-Home-Outdoor-Water-Bottles-for-Bicycle-Sports-750ML-Food-Grade-Plastic-Kettle-Water-Bottle-Diameter/32735315451.html?spm=2114.13010608.0.0.DL5UK0" target="_blank">super-cheap on Ali Express</a>). We set up a Hydration Station and made sure everyone stayed hydrated!<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjnsYCGiWpvRDFYQBK7VWCtZYU0dCS1_aPcL4UjL8VB-rtQ1U9OHkAsZwz4DMDCiMZPsGNYFooVOP6c0MOxTusWAJ0svXA-dgwt8JUZWcTkf8W2w8iT9MrTgH8zDhpqIQ9f1lbrAqx0Q44/s1600/hydration+station+-+water+for+all.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="Sports Party Hydration Station - individually names sipper bottles make a great take-home gift" border="0" data-original-height="530" data-original-width="750" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjnsYCGiWpvRDFYQBK7VWCtZYU0dCS1_aPcL4UjL8VB-rtQ1U9OHkAsZwz4DMDCiMZPsGNYFooVOP6c0MOxTusWAJ0svXA-dgwt8JUZWcTkf8W2w8iT9MrTgH8zDhpqIQ9f1lbrAqx0Q44/s1600/hydration+station+-+water+for+all.jpg" title="Sports Party Hydration Station - individually names sipper bottles make a great take-home gift" /></a></div>
</div>
<h2>
LET THE GAMES BEGIN</h2>
<div>
After the kids had worked out in Scrag's Gym, tucked into a Sporty feast and battled out a few rounds of foozeball, they walked around the corner to our local football club where we had set up cones and a hydration station and were ready for action.</div>
<div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgM2Y_zGsNSa1O2dIFIXMYX4C3Ay8yxLXbUpycOGLF6ErkwKI1eWCYh0jRmE9Drs-r9k8q1x1B9n7bUbfjAMtfwE3ZW3N-4DWnUMvOCWGewUpoAO9UJTLRw2g6O1dbDbKucHXzA5U52Zsc/s1600/Tag+rugby.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1417" data-original-width="750" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgM2Y_zGsNSa1O2dIFIXMYX4C3Ay8yxLXbUpycOGLF6ErkwKI1eWCYh0jRmE9Drs-r9k8q1x1B9n7bUbfjAMtfwE3ZW3N-4DWnUMvOCWGewUpoAO9UJTLRw2g6O1dbDbKucHXzA5U52Zsc/s1600/Tag+rugby.jpg" /></a></div>
<br /></div>
<div>
TAG FOOTBALL</div>
<div>
First up, a game of "rippa" rugby (aka tag football) - with my homemade "rips" decorated with the symbols of Scrag's two favourite countries - Brazil and New Zealand. I made these from felt, a belt loop and a tag, which velcroed together. The game is primarily touch rugby but instead of touching (or tackling) a player to get the ball, you have to grab their "tag" and pull it off. After three rips in a row, possession changes.</div>
<div>
We ended up with two very competitive teams: Big Brother captaining a team of Scrag's friends vs. Little Brother captaining a team of cousins + sis. Intense stuff!</div>
<div>
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<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj_72dcK28i753_OIGaVblgW7iO175BTAb8zKihJLpwn2E3V1BpvhASuUHXJOErJy9a1yrpQfDekM9m6gaozKm8SYLzkU89KB0gCWHAURmgT_j_ECKZKuLecqk7wq04GCD8FDB6qkesleY/s1600/Bumper+Ball+collage.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="Bumper Ball (Bubble Soccer) is fabulous Fun!" border="0" data-original-height="1417" data-original-width="750" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj_72dcK28i753_OIGaVblgW7iO175BTAb8zKihJLpwn2E3V1BpvhASuUHXJOErJy9a1yrpQfDekM9m6gaozKm8SYLzkU89KB0gCWHAURmgT_j_ECKZKuLecqk7wq04GCD8FDB6qkesleY/s1600/Bumper+Ball+collage.jpg" title="Bumper Ball (Bubble Soccer) is fabulous Fun!" /></a></div>
<br /></div>
<div>
BUBBLE SOCCER</div>
<div>
When the <a href="http://www.bumperball.co.nz/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">Bumper Ball</a> guy arrived, fun really began.</div>
<div>
The pictures say it all really. It was meant to be a serious "scored" game of bubble soccer but it turned into simple joyful mayhem with everyone landing upside down plenty of times, and much laughter.</div>
<div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiSvyYFbiFhDC8MP5UC_XKIbpARk1ySgAXAHom-EdBau_jAvcHlG2tesDZ63jNieht54U4L3GBm6w8gkf7q1MT5lWSiII9OxQqygjvMOPveXtflxuqAS5er71CS8jCdj15k867LhLL1rRI/s1600/SportsParty0158.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="Happiness is - Bumper ball at your sports party" border="0" data-original-height="563" data-original-width="750" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiSvyYFbiFhDC8MP5UC_XKIbpARk1ySgAXAHom-EdBau_jAvcHlG2tesDZ63jNieht54U4L3GBm6w8gkf7q1MT5lWSiII9OxQqygjvMOPveXtflxuqAS5er71CS8jCdj15k867LhLL1rRI/s1600/SportsParty0158.JPG" title="Happiness is - Bumper ball at your sports party" /></a></div>
<br /></div>
<div>
Having <a href="http://www.bumperball.co.nz/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">Bumper Ball</a> at our party really gave the whole day a sense of excitement and anticipation. it was The Main Event that the kids couldn't wait for.</div>
<div>
As a non-sporty parent I was very glad to see the van pull up and those giant wearable balls appear.</div>
<div>
Hilarious to watch, and fun to do (apparently). I mean, just look at those faces!<br />
<br /></div>
<div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi7KMrlXNwgOp-yNHvtcV2dl1HTCyd4TjmoYu2KU1FkeFgJCY1BiuSc8qyOIz8XWWRvIrxWg_0cdA9Y8vnBf45vhGDTuKA6jdXozDA_etRQ4212FiPHyEpep1EWgoBS9Jlmp0LDbnXPh2s/s1600/SportsParty0160.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="Bumper Ball is loads of fun" border="0" data-original-height="563" data-original-width="750" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi7KMrlXNwgOp-yNHvtcV2dl1HTCyd4TjmoYu2KU1FkeFgJCY1BiuSc8qyOIz8XWWRvIrxWg_0cdA9Y8vnBf45vhGDTuKA6jdXozDA_etRQ4212FiPHyEpep1EWgoBS9Jlmp0LDbnXPh2s/s1600/SportsParty0160.JPG" title="Bumper Ball is loads of fun" /></a></div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjMb_yozO3en2-OvopIEKw3vQ34qgcO3SKFL6ypuzFa2g_nirkUOadzvWe8lLprHgA2mJue-XcNdX8Me7ZLXQ5Jk6ZJZ8ZqsYkyL0GmW2hen3KGrJgWLBfGMsgLsF5Wi3EZGIsWqa1n-NE/s1600/SportsParty0144.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="With bumper ball you end up Upside Down a fair bit..." border="0" data-original-height="563" data-original-width="750" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjMb_yozO3en2-OvopIEKw3vQ34qgcO3SKFL6ypuzFa2g_nirkUOadzvWe8lLprHgA2mJue-XcNdX8Me7ZLXQ5Jk6ZJZ8ZqsYkyL0GmW2hen3KGrJgWLBfGMsgLsF5Wi3EZGIsWqa1n-NE/s1600/SportsParty0144.JPG" title="With bumper ball you end up Upside Down a fair bit..." /></a></div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgXYwXP8jsR-IbAuUjpnArmUSnORwTWN0TccbhRKilMzBj-OdyPI_xudBXDtO1MEEhEROBvLUQGqwZK3FdKJxZl6ANI8e1eojo3Dr4uSSskbOWBtYy_2-Tu6-Z5wmgeESPphKqgU5jIA9c/s1600/SportsParty0180.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="Just Chillin on our bumper balls" border="0" data-original-height="563" data-original-width="750" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgXYwXP8jsR-IbAuUjpnArmUSnORwTWN0TccbhRKilMzBj-OdyPI_xudBXDtO1MEEhEROBvLUQGqwZK3FdKJxZl6ANI8e1eojo3Dr4uSSskbOWBtYy_2-Tu6-Z5wmgeESPphKqgU5jIA9c/s1600/SportsParty0180.JPG" title="Just Chillin on our bumper balls" /></a></div>
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<br /></div>
<div>
RUNNING RACES</div>
<div>
Scrag is mad on Usain Bolt and his Sports Party would not be complete without some running races. We'd planned to have a whole bunch of different ones, but time got away on us so we ended up just running a series of relay races (with our pool diving sticks serving as batons).<br />
<br /></div>
<div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiozzTu7tID6yQOcI7vFJTIB6Sr9bcFSxu-uJSpcZCg5FtpkLYC5RzAPUWgYO31T1RuMNCpRIS8hR8XesPzv5VLr_utHeDzXZ6cJfAk-AmlMmFQIliDCWumcs-RzvGQtHIAb44fUbizMUI/s1600/relay+races.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="Running Relay Races... again and again... all the way round the football field" border="0" data-original-height="1188" data-original-width="750" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiozzTu7tID6yQOcI7vFJTIB6Sr9bcFSxu-uJSpcZCg5FtpkLYC5RzAPUWgYO31T1RuMNCpRIS8hR8XesPzv5VLr_utHeDzXZ6cJfAk-AmlMmFQIliDCWumcs-RzvGQtHIAb44fUbizMUI/s1600/relay+races.jpg" title="Running Relay Races... again and again... all the way round the football field" /></a></div>
<br />
Scrag was mostly satisfied with the way his plans played out in real life, though he did wish we could have run more races. On a <i>real</i> running track. With lanes and a starter gun. But we do what we can, right?</div>
<h2>
BIRTHDAY CAKE</h2>
<div>
This cake was very very simple - but did the job and the birthday boy was impressed. It was another one of my amateur, slightly wobbly DIY efforts (don't look too close) but it was ooohed and ahhhhed over by the birthday boy and his pals and then gobbled up with glee.</div>
<div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgBwk7lvnIReY7vd7KFkrlFYkq8QM0Z0PEp0q8zINAqS9XNPuhKdzW-OtN-D_ElkqcFsoAVasseow-snznCRIVFws2zJt92Kg-b_364BqxfScNi3dW8g5foBCzvtYWc25Fe-ejGsHvEzTE/s1600/SportsParty0035.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="Wow Mum, I love it!" border="0" data-original-height="563" data-original-width="750" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgBwk7lvnIReY7vd7KFkrlFYkq8QM0Z0PEp0q8zINAqS9XNPuhKdzW-OtN-D_ElkqcFsoAVasseow-snznCRIVFws2zJt92Kg-b_364BqxfScNi3dW8g5foBCzvtYWc25Fe-ejGsHvEzTE/s1600/SportsParty0035.JPG" title="Wow Mum, I love it!" /></a></div>
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<div>
A simple <a href="http://www.greatfun4kidsblog.com/2008/11/sports-party-menu.html">two-layer chocolate cake</a>, with green buttercream between the layers and on top, then overlaid with a homemade fondant soccer ball. I'm always relieved when my ideas work out - and this one actually did!<br />
<br />
I turned a metal star cookie cutter into a pentagon by straightening out the sides. Rolled out white fondant, cut out pentagon-shaped holes. Rolled out black fondant, cut out black pentagons to fill the holes. Pressed pentagon-shaped impressions over the rest of the white fondant to give it a 3-D soccer ball effect. Positioned a side-plate over the rolled out fondant and trimmed around it - oh look a DIY Soccer Ball Fondant Cake Topper! Then I *carefully* placed my new cake topper on top of the cake. Which I smeared with green buttercream first, to help it stick (and make it taste better). Any pentagons that dropped out, I carefully replaced once the main topper was in position...</div>
<div>
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<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiWtFWKAqfEVyOb_x5QAmgnBUn3cbUdXDAT5hqIWGFLIrlfqRP1HIdfXZ7ODPOqY6BHrXwh3BWN9yRviMtkrjrI8Brm83PUr0aCBOhoQw3yqgcClNz85kKtoQgbnckN3u-ZYs-1LbO_G8U/s1600/DIY+soccer+ball+fondant+cake+topper.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="DIY Fondant Soccer Ball Cake Topper" border="0" data-original-height="706" data-original-width="750" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiWtFWKAqfEVyOb_x5QAmgnBUn3cbUdXDAT5hqIWGFLIrlfqRP1HIdfXZ7ODPOqY6BHrXwh3BWN9yRviMtkrjrI8Brm83PUr0aCBOhoQw3yqgcClNz85kKtoQgbnckN3u-ZYs-1LbO_G8U/s1600/DIY+soccer+ball+fondant+cake+topper.jpg" title="DIY Fondant Soccer Ball Cake Topper" /></a></div>
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<div>
Voila! A DIY Soccer Ball Cake!<br />
<br />
(<a href="http://www.kiwicakes.co.nz/kiwi/cake-boards-and-cards-patterned-cake-card-boards-grass-finish-masonite-cake-board-14-round-p-16105.html" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">Amazing "Grass" Patterned Cake Board from KiwiCakes</a>)<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjDSv4bqYAnn3DQ86GGdlgS2PsQ03m_HGi0t-3KP1Az1CRtRIeR3w7Huel_vKreMsOyJo27dE-Xoq7HHPCCAY7G7_5ymv2d6ulET1LGrUuerdmp6viZPKfdeBDjtRhSkqZFZNuPCI1Cv4g/s1600/IMG_8794.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="DIY Fondant Soccer Ball Cake Topper - a bit wobblybut made with love and received with joy" border="0" data-original-height="1200" data-original-width="1600" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjDSv4bqYAnn3DQ86GGdlgS2PsQ03m_HGi0t-3KP1Az1CRtRIeR3w7Huel_vKreMsOyJo27dE-Xoq7HHPCCAY7G7_5ymv2d6ulET1LGrUuerdmp6viZPKfdeBDjtRhSkqZFZNuPCI1Cv4g/s1600/IMG_8794.JPG" title="DIY Fondant Soccer Ball Cake Topper - a bit wobblybut made with love and received with joy" width="750" /></a></div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg_hFFmtAuhaNJfzk5MpatA140vbqA4y88HOIpnD0VnVCng3KZCBjD0FnpS5cBfvGP2M1ze0vd8AdFm5EfBTaxF4LoAOBaPHbaF9JTXcwiaOJ01f_HV71XAK45iUBXTcd1UK2FTtq9duvM/s1600/IMG_9052.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="Soccer Ball birthday Cake" border="0" data-original-height="1200" data-original-width="1600" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg_hFFmtAuhaNJfzk5MpatA140vbqA4y88HOIpnD0VnVCng3KZCBjD0FnpS5cBfvGP2M1ze0vd8AdFm5EfBTaxF4LoAOBaPHbaF9JTXcwiaOJ01f_HV71XAK45iUBXTcd1UK2FTtq9duvM/s1600/IMG_9052.JPG" title="Soccer Ball birthday Cake" width="750" /></a></div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgFeNVW1e1LCv3nMShd52hYnkddRh5NK1l4mzYgguYUB48TSKnud4Ao8THKHSQXLmJYCogarwhT9o1O6EZy1LghrMrCVQQexvWB_YYOm3RuLW9kOha7859GLaKGPMeE1RKJDkoeaVod5Ow/s1600/IMG_9058.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="The birthday boy and his pals loved his birthday cake" border="0" data-original-height="1200" data-original-width="1600" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgFeNVW1e1LCv3nMShd52hYnkddRh5NK1l4mzYgguYUB48TSKnud4Ao8THKHSQXLmJYCogarwhT9o1O6EZy1LghrMrCVQQexvWB_YYOm3RuLW9kOha7859GLaKGPMeE1RKJDkoeaVod5Ow/s1600/IMG_9058.JPG" title="The birthday boy and his pals loved his birthday cake" width="750" /></a></div>
<br />
So there you have it. An action packed birthday party for a sports-mad nine-year-old. Done and dusted and enjoyed by all.<br />
<b><br /></b>
<b>MASSIVE THANKS TO THE GUYS AT <a href="http://bumperball.co.nz/">BUMPERBALL.CO.NZ</a> for helping make this party so epic! We thoroughly recommend Bumper Ball for amazing party fun for all ages (7+). They operate in locations all around New Zealand and come to you at your venue (park, sports field or huge backyard). <a href="http://www.bumperball.co.nz/locations/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">LOCATIONS AROUND NZ: </a>Check out the <a href="http://www.bumperball.co.nz/locations/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">regions they operate</a> in around New Zealand.</b><br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjdx91x301zqOdcu0bGFrAE7dexZ-h5a9HOCnPi6fBuqrC0pnrY7sh2MqcxwFYBiYGDFnh6Ofg9x3yoigSUs3HEq3vWddm6tJSgcokzj0Uwf_ihGUp9MqAJYOWAmEBmEXXn51tjiwjAYJI/s1600/SportsParty0175.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="563" data-original-width="750" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjdx91x301zqOdcu0bGFrAE7dexZ-h5a9HOCnPi6fBuqrC0pnrY7sh2MqcxwFYBiYGDFnh6Ofg9x3yoigSUs3HEq3vWddm6tJSgcokzj0Uwf_ihGUp9MqAJYOWAmEBmEXXn51tjiwjAYJI/s1600/SportsParty0175.JPG" /></a></div>
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<a href="http://www.bumperball.co.nz/" rel="nofollow"><img src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhl5qcvNQsSHGBM5yO5uDOtUvZHBDM8FYzutm5mXpstW3WEgCAtPRshCXwMCZy0kHEzK5F0Cja0i6ZvVAS5JPBn-ZogigbHQYJeaI44LVtzrxBKmTsDPrXyr7fh6Eay7sSGt1kdCOchsjA/s1600/bumperball+banner.jpg" width="750" /></a></div>
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<a href="http://www.kiwicakes.co.nz/" rel="nofollow"><img src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiUKfwdAT2vkfsEye1CVPor0w9Kt8vCtCjonwsrW6Y3el3jDvm5knovTYMrYEu7xkVT8uD_2SPS3pKgnyBo2cWuGCiNiBZda1eP7ESnElzY9RU02kFZMnCkLVXqBiNuO-npxBR_APHH1_A/s1600/kiwicakes+partner+post+banner+NEW.jpg" width="750" /></a>
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Simoneyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09554122579485306611noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4940553413759896971.post-71437375562341377622017-04-12T23:40:00.002+12:002017-11-02T14:29:19.484+13:00One Foot in Front of the Other<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiYeIdJLF84F3Fn0D5000hdBSnpY3FuX4KOdbhonM6KYbaRh7Cefnvaa-iCpAEYeLhwoqB-RlGI90AsJ8swj9wCtmuGvdT5SsNDukAnCP-Tb-6M4zErMGH0ephDo4oDnM4Gl1UGTi-RwAM/s1600/trees.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="One foot in front of the other" border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiYeIdJLF84F3Fn0D5000hdBSnpY3FuX4KOdbhonM6KYbaRh7Cefnvaa-iCpAEYeLhwoqB-RlGI90AsJ8swj9wCtmuGvdT5SsNDukAnCP-Tb-6M4zErMGH0ephDo4oDnM4Gl1UGTi-RwAM/s1600/trees.jpg" title="One foot in front of the other" /></a></div>
<br />
Right about now I'm wishing I had some Easter inspiration to share with you. Wise words or bright ideas, either one would do.<br />
<a href="http://www.greatfun4kidsblog.com/2014/04/easter-me-and-mine.html" target="_blank">One of those posts from days-gone-by </a>popped up in my Facebook "memories" the other day. I read it and sighed... a deep soul-weary sigh.<br />
<br />
<i>Breath in, breath out</i>, I tell myself. <i>Keep putting one foot in front of the other.</i><br />
Just one more trip to football training in rush hour traffic, one more early morning drop-off to the train, one more night of worrying about bedtimes and lunchboxes and clean uniforms.<br />
Just one more day and it's school holidays. A chance to catch our breath and pause for a few days.<br />
Man, this tiredness is bone-deep.<br />
<br />
By body rebelled on the weekend and I kind of crashed. Had to pull the plug on all the plans, hunker down and conserve energy, go nowhere (a fair amount of takeaways may have been consumed).<br />
<br />
I think it was the endless going-and-going without a break for so long; holding it together for everyone, keeping all the balls and plates in the air and spinning. Sole parenting is not for the faint-hearted.<br />
Me myself, I'll admit it - I'm knackered.<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj4TG_eH8EdtGUHEEjxZzpZ_x39gwyJ9-ZFFEeM1uk1nk8ckXBRspNaK33uMUAG0zdaWNJKMWbtBQp1_qWt9ghcFf0ZlcS4SKUUrhh8XVPcmFJHM65-2fTFHlFjqgkx8Panu_b880jtSIs/s1600/bed.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="My bedroom, my sanctuary" border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj4TG_eH8EdtGUHEEjxZzpZ_x39gwyJ9-ZFFEeM1uk1nk8ckXBRspNaK33uMUAG0zdaWNJKMWbtBQp1_qWt9ghcFf0ZlcS4SKUUrhh8XVPcmFJHM65-2fTFHlFjqgkx8Panu_b880jtSIs/s1600/bed.jpg" title="My bedroom, my sanctuary" /></a></div>
<br />
<span style="font-size: large;">I haven't actually got anything earth-shattering to say, nothing particularly deep to share, just this:</span><br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjnNFSH1gKzLy2Mts8uH9wtOI7acTacAemyaLNAaRtVZ1YfYDSCHDmijkVTilMHLCPz3dsAJ7LEWVd62oIpQsqG7FAgjHMZqAIUkRZhgqx2Bqz74pt7mCVx3XqKpggOVqNgD4hXF5Ufr2I/s1600/wings.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="She had wings" border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjnNFSH1gKzLy2Mts8uH9wtOI7acTacAemyaLNAaRtVZ1YfYDSCHDmijkVTilMHLCPz3dsAJ7LEWVd62oIpQsqG7FAgjHMZqAIUkRZhgqx2Bqz74pt7mCVx3XqKpggOVqNgD4hXF5Ufr2I/s1600/wings.jpg" title="She had wings" /></a></div>
<br />
I was given this print-out last week and I aspire to it - to transform, to have "wings".<br />
<br />
These days I catch glimpses of the person I used to be - strong, confident, capable. I lost that person along the way, I really did. My kids don't know that strong person; I hardly know her myself. But I'm seeing glimpses of her returning along with something that looks remarkably like a backbone (I'm having to grow one, quick-smart).<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhpHA9e_NgfrVy04a4mC8uvYUJPOAfhRby0CKRmlZ9c4MElM9M-4gwC2TWwCSWKSTvZGCBVi_E-6zTOYMOmcIM0rceyXXQed5QXTfJF1KN4iiOEgndAQNaPi88eCpe3Lh91xCaHrNnslYk/s1600/sleeping.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="My sleeping "baby"" border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhpHA9e_NgfrVy04a4mC8uvYUJPOAfhRby0CKRmlZ9c4MElM9M-4gwC2TWwCSWKSTvZGCBVi_E-6zTOYMOmcIM0rceyXXQed5QXTfJF1KN4iiOEgndAQNaPi88eCpe3Lh91xCaHrNnslYk/s1600/sleeping.jpg" title="My sleeping "baby"" /></a></div>
<br />
Tired as I am, bone-weary, exhausted, as I type this and upload my photos and reflect on that poem, I'm reminded that I've come so very far. No wonder I'm so tired.<br />
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<a href="http://www.greatfun4kidsblog.com/2009/07/wordless-wednesday-having-ball.html" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"></a><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiWnfcg0j3TFL1luOxle43jSxQaHRxDj-QTDdiiBfpOBnbdAerEgcs8dM7wH6QnEZ0I9WMoJup7i-M2WIvz-9XfEaC9MAzFwoZeeMUiwnhQc7zh2ymNTenKZ4cXtISFsGoL_VPb5cZMt-8/s1600/teapot.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="Hot Cross Buns and Tea" border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiWnfcg0j3TFL1luOxle43jSxQaHRxDj-QTDdiiBfpOBnbdAerEgcs8dM7wH6QnEZ0I9WMoJup7i-M2WIvz-9XfEaC9MAzFwoZeeMUiwnhQc7zh2ymNTenKZ4cXtISFsGoL_VPb5cZMt-8/s1600/teapot.jpg" title="Hot Cross Buns and Tea" /></a></div>
<br />
So now it's almost Easter. There are hot cross buns stockpiled in the freezer; a few chocolate eggs hidden in my bedroom, and a bottle of sparkling grape juice stashed in the pantry. It's all I can muster.<br />
In the middle of the cyclone that's about to hit (as well as the excitement of visiting cousins and a special boy turning nine), I'm hoping that somehow this Easter weekend, I can take a moment with my kids to mark the occasion and remember why we're getting this holiday.<br />
<br />
Easter might not be quite as flash and<a href="http://www.greatfun4kidsblog.com/2014/04/easter-me-and-mine.html" target="_blank"> fun as it used to be</a> back in the day when <a href="http://www.greatfun4kidsblog.com/2012/04/dinnertime-in-30ad.html" target="_blank">I used to make us all dress up in theme and eat roast lamb</a>. Oh man, I sigh with nostalgia over those days (no-one will dress up anymore these days, we are all too cool and grownup *sniff*)<br />
<br />
But something tells me that all we need is one quiet moment with faux-vino and some bread to break in remembrance of Him.<br />
<br />
It'll have to do.<br />
<br />
xxx<br />
<br />Simoneyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09554122579485306611noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4940553413759896971.post-9409450506165377782017-03-17T14:27:00.003+13:002022-03-17T11:58:40.492+13:00Pearls<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEguAqeSJ-Zvk54sKva331O7spClt63rRg6xR8QRuNAdHhBmFivkeuqyuutkntgRpy4LmHpod-Dpk163NJJhKNTuSeyDNrC3NKVMGSWtUcEkVJehEKeGp9HYCsTtjD0jiEfc2Z73KJ7msjI/s1600/scrag+with+pearl.jpg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="Pearls - deep and meaningful conversations with my son" border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEguAqeSJ-Zvk54sKva331O7spClt63rRg6xR8QRuNAdHhBmFivkeuqyuutkntgRpy4LmHpod-Dpk163NJJhKNTuSeyDNrC3NKVMGSWtUcEkVJehEKeGp9HYCsTtjD0jiEfc2Z73KJ7msjI/s1600/scrag+with+pearl.jpg" title="Pearls - deep and meaningful conversations with my son" /></a></div>
<br />
This post is the result of a conversation I had in the car with Scrag this morning - a deep and meaningful discussion about the meaning of life (the kind of talks I often find myself having with my eight-year-old. It's how we roll).<br />
There we are driving along in traffic, rushing, on the cusp of lateness as always, and he says, "Mum do you think there's a plan for everything? Is there a point to it?"<br />
<br />
See what I mean? Deep. This kid is DEEP.<br />
I know where he's coming from, what he is trying to get at.<br />
With all the crappy things that happen, is there a reason or plan behind it? Is there a reason why we go through stuff?<br />
<br />
Here's how I answered him...<br />
<a name='more'></a>Do I think there's a plan for everything, as in, <i>everything that happens is part of a story that's playing out and we have no control? </i>Nope, I don't.<br />
I don't think God is up there pulling the strings on what's happening to us. It's not like that.<br />
We're not pre-programmed robots or actors reading lines in a play.<br />
But do I think that all the bad things <i>can </i>have a purpose and be turned around and made into something worthwhile and valuable? Absolutely.<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEioAQI_KO-3-j8EZxKmhBBkv3pzm1A2P4JVE9BwfSsaiFXv9v43wDvnuh5pTsAuNRWTmLg31q1XEbHG6k-YXU3CW4hfUGMGAoYtkFaqY3GT5TwV-11dPijBBbyQFMjfZAppcxZNZwyedJI/s1600/pearls.jpg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="Pearls" border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEioAQI_KO-3-j8EZxKmhBBkv3pzm1A2P4JVE9BwfSsaiFXv9v43wDvnuh5pTsAuNRWTmLg31q1XEbHG6k-YXU3CW4hfUGMGAoYtkFaqY3GT5TwV-11dPijBBbyQFMjfZAppcxZNZwyedJI/s1600/pearls.jpg" title="Pearls" /></a></div>
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Then I told him about pearls.<br />
Pearls are formed when there's an irritation, something painful and uncomfortable inside an oyster's shell. The oyster's way of dealing with the pain is to transform the irritation into something valuable. Without the irritation, there would be no pearl.<br />
<br />
What we go through in our lives, can make us bitter (and hard and angry) or it can make us better (compassionate, kind, warm, generous).<br />
<br />
What we learn going through our own hard stuff can be offered to others who are going through tough times too.<br />
That becomes our treasure that we can share with the world.<br />
<i><br /></i>"Do you get what I mean, son?"<br />
"Yep, cool! Bye-mum-love-you-have-a-great-day!"<br />
<br />
After he jumped out and ran to his bus, I pondered the saying "pearls of wisdom".<br />
<i>Pearls. </i>Huh. There's probably a reason wisdom is likened to pearls.<br />
A pearl is a treasure created out of pain, just like wisdom, which comes at a price.<br />
I can offer you my opinion on plenty of topics - opinions are free and easy to dispense and therefore have little real value.<br />
But if I offer you what I've learnt from the pain I've been through in life? Those are my "pearls", my hard-won wisdom, born out of the struggle.<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEglzHPirpRuDTUCGEt8neVIlFpAV2yIO_EVA_mRGmhhAG32o9nP82Wr8TUkubQE-rs1ikOv3PBiU6y-uN4a4J8lvTv9jGiHTeauVu2_CKictW2l1S5zmFA8yeQ8tOx8LjmUSP4Jlpeqrns/s1600/mistymorning.JPG" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="Hope" border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEglzHPirpRuDTUCGEt8neVIlFpAV2yIO_EVA_mRGmhhAG32o9nP82Wr8TUkubQE-rs1ikOv3PBiU6y-uN4a4J8lvTv9jGiHTeauVu2_CKictW2l1S5zmFA8yeQ8tOx8LjmUSP4Jlpeqrns/s1600/mistymorning.JPG" title="Hope" /></a></div>
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I spotted an article in my Facebook feed this morning which was uncannily right on this topic of there being a plan and purpose to everything: "<a href="http://wmpaulyoung.com/god-is-in-control/" target="_blank">Lies we Believe about God: Lie #3 - <i>God is in control</i>.</a>"<br />
The article was written by Wm. Paul Young, author of the book that forever changed the way I see God (for the better), <a href="http://wmpaulyoung.com/the-shack/" target="_blank"><i>The Shack</i></a>.<br />
<br />
This quote says it all, really, and sums up how I see things:<br />
<blockquote class="tr_bq">
<span style="font-family: "courier new" , "courier" , monospace;">"How often have we heard the well-intentioned words, “It must be part of God’s plan”?<br />Really?<br />Or might it be that many things are simply wrong?<br />There is no justification for much of what we have brought to the table, what has been done to us, and what we participate in ourselves. It is wrong! Wrong, wrong, wrong, wrong, wrong!<br />Yes, God has the creative audacity to build purpose out of the evil we generate, but that will never justify what is wrong.</span></blockquote>
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<blockquote class="tr_bq">
<span style="font-family: "courier new" , "courier" , monospace;"><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-weight: normal;">...What if this is about a God who has greater respect for you than for "the plan”? </span></span><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-weight: normal;">What if there is no “plan” for your life but rather a <u>relationship</u> in which God constantly invites us to co-create...</span></span><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-weight: normal;">And what if this God, who is Love, will never be satisfied until only that which is of Love’s kind remains in us?"</span></span></span></blockquote>
</h2>
<blockquote class="tr_bq">
<span style="font-family: "courier new" , "courier" , monospace;"> --<span><a href="http://wmpaulyoung.com/god-is-in-control/" target="_blank">Wm. Paul Young (full article here)</a></span></span></blockquote>
<br />
When I consider <a href="http://www.greatfun4kidsblog.com/2016/09/twists-turns-on-rollercoaster.html" target="_blank">the end of my marriage</a>, and what our family has been through in the process there is no way I could ever say that this was part of a Divine plan. This trauma and devastation wasn't "meant to be". It's messed up!<br />
<br />
BUT.<br />
I know beyond a shadow of a doubt, that out of the ashes of the mess God can restore beauty.<br />
I know that from the hurt and disappointment and the pain of it all, if I let Him in to my mess, he can transform it all into something of value, something that I can share with others walking through the same pain.<br />
I <i>know </i>this to be true in the deepest part of my core.<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjhahnXdwaJqHlgveJEKTPjRBV7lhoVKg8o9ZPORyMRVAXPfPYnTGXQovFcG9nOEf7OOPBkks6DeU_koqC3PnAppcRf3Wy1YWNSBvjBAbA8wjE7rWm5kvKJAEDllOJ_HJw5YHR81VYoCbU/s1600/scrag+and+mum.jpg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="Me and my Scrag (a treasure)" border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjhahnXdwaJqHlgveJEKTPjRBV7lhoVKg8o9ZPORyMRVAXPfPYnTGXQovFcG9nOEf7OOPBkks6DeU_koqC3PnAppcRf3Wy1YWNSBvjBAbA8wjE7rWm5kvKJAEDllOJ_HJw5YHR81VYoCbU/s1600/scrag+and+mum.jpg" title="Me and my Scrag (a treasure)" /></a></div>
<br />
Therefore I can say with confidence to my son, who is trying to make sense of the struggles* he faces, "Yes, there can be a good purpose to everything we go through. The sad, bad and mad can be made useful and valuable in our lives; our pain and our discomfort can become the pearls we share with the world."<br />
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It's not empty words, I'm living it.<br />
<br />
........................<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiX1kiFQx3Qihb3JXW910EHv9-Jacfw8nfVoye2LjAOswyq6RqkDMUFwYH2DmBNL2AVCFYbzRlj-0BNvI-Xxf1X8QEItUXoR7LSo9zKQHCC2QEJt0pFGNkaQcsnOz4oIpOoDBAKBnyi8Nc/s1600/beauty+for+ashes.jpg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="Beauty for ashes" border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiX1kiFQx3Qihb3JXW910EHv9-Jacfw8nfVoye2LjAOswyq6RqkDMUFwYH2DmBNL2AVCFYbzRlj-0BNvI-Xxf1X8QEItUXoR7LSo9zKQHCC2QEJt0pFGNkaQcsnOz4oIpOoDBAKBnyi8Nc/s1600/beauty+for+ashes.jpg" title="Beauty for ashes" /></a></div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh7ZnpR_aaa6ZGviBL6vTBNJB3ERXcmgaMKOuDxChRYLWL167hWL8YBXKYzPbKE3ADQvto6xrNKjyQpWfJA0YJNtHEMok1mVNWR6sJEwPEOSlWIf0Fs9X65B0MhHk0MgHwfdvtD2TqKHCY/s1600/in+all+things.jpg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="In all things" border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh7ZnpR_aaa6ZGviBL6vTBNJB3ERXcmgaMKOuDxChRYLWL167hWL8YBXKYzPbKE3ADQvto6xrNKjyQpWfJA0YJNtHEMok1mVNWR6sJEwPEOSlWIf0Fs9X65B0MhHk0MgHwfdvtD2TqKHCY/s1600/in+all+things.jpg" title="In all things" /></a></div>
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<span style="font-size: x-small;">*(Scrag has<a href="http://www.greatfun4kidsblog.com/p/quirky-is-normal-in-our-family.html" target="_blank"> ADHD and Dyslexia</a> to deal with on top of our family journey)</span>Simoneyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09554122579485306611noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4940553413759896971.post-38004894798103067792017-03-03T10:30:00.001+13:002021-09-04T18:19:32.980+12:00Dog Zoo (or "what was I thinking?")<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhuVTfe1XHHNbas6banVtZVt2yI2MJx7mHcRyk6gYG39W5Tk3bKevU19RrqRccO77mpTuIVMt2Jfw2iqxxhH8_I1mrlEmx7NCc5fYgNBSvQ9b6HGuH7KR8RUalRY9dCrH8xbfa_kA-BXj8/s1600/fostering+buddy0016.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="Dog Zoo - our foster-puppy adventure" border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhuVTfe1XHHNbas6banVtZVt2yI2MJx7mHcRyk6gYG39W5Tk3bKevU19RrqRccO77mpTuIVMt2Jfw2iqxxhH8_I1mrlEmx7NCc5fYgNBSvQ9b6HGuH7KR8RUalRY9dCrH8xbfa_kA-BXj8/s1600/fostering+buddy0016.JPG" title="Dog Zoo - our foster-puppy adventure" /></a></div>
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It started as most adventures do - with the kids nagging. This time it was for a <i>second </i>dog. They had all the reasons, all the well-thought out arguments, all the reasons <i>why</i>: Clyde the not-so-puppy could really do with a friend to play with during the long days when I am at work. He gets bored, And lonely. And if ONE dog is awesome and fabulous and wonderful, imagine the fun of TWO dogs?<br />
<br />
I came right back with my best shoot-em-down disclaimers: I can only just afford ONE dog, I couldn't afford to look after TWO. Vet bills for two? Worming and flea treatments for two? <i>Forgeddaboutit</i>. Plus, who knew how much extra work an extra puppy would be? It would probably all end up on my plate, and my plate is already full.<br />
<br />
But I wasn't prepared for their clincher: <i>fostering.</i><br />
We could foster a rescue puppy, the rescue people would pay for all the expenses, Clyde would have a friend for free... and when that puppy moved on to a new family, we'd get a new puppy. Endless puppies, endless cuteness. A win-win situation for all...<br />
They caught me unawares with their clever logic and I caved.<br />
<br />
<a name='more'></a>I emailed the <a href="https://www.facebook.com/DC-Rescue-Dogs-357400844359301/" target="_blank">DC Rescue</a> people (where we got Clyde from) and inquired about fostering. I honestly expected them to come back and say that we are too inexperienced/unsuitable/not needed - but no. We fit the bill and they are always desperate for new foster families. Before I knew it the kids were scouring the foster puppy page to find a new buddy for Clyde...<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg1fIgXt3PlPGEMk3zN3Zo4JyZ84S8L8PiNR4-SXx17ah3mi6r9w4BiMxH54DE5wM7VVr3wIJ0J54vvbKwrdsFXO1DBI_KLETWQc2HLoy3okMbF7gQAmMWUGLmQu7yRVr3o2eMh69DXdtk/s1600/fostering+buddy0002.PNG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="Buddy was locked in a garage for four days while his owners went on holiday" border="0" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg1fIgXt3PlPGEMk3zN3Zo4JyZ84S8L8PiNR4-SXx17ah3mi6r9w4BiMxH54DE5wM7VVr3wIJ0J54vvbKwrdsFXO1DBI_KLETWQc2HLoy3okMbF7gQAmMWUGLmQu7yRVr3o2eMh69DXdtk/s400/fostering+buddy0002.PNG" title="Buddy was locked in a garage for four days while his owners went on holiday" width="306" /></a></div>
<br />
And we literally found a Buddy. This pup was in the pound after being rescued from a locked garage where he'd been for over four days without food or water while his owners went on holiday. Our hearts broke, Who would do such a thing??? Poor Buddy.<br />
<br />
Knowing that Buddy's time at the pound was running out, we said we'd take him (after a certain time in the pound with no-one coming for them, the dogs get put down, <i>waaaaah!</i>)<br />
Buddy was described as sweet and affectionate, and would love a family with children or another dog. That was us alright.<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjm2R1HXoCbIOm3pGiZP1fHftj3knuOqqz7e-Ib0ja_0vAGsdGCHvbN7bERGptfKS82tOR2JCFCDE-k6LTbVP1-pzlWLMugj2I5qTz5jxYp7aX9UXiC3pMNVxli392JYPhCWA8buDzaL0A/s1600/fostering+buddy0005.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="Scrag snuggles a very happy Buddy in the car on our way home from picking him up from the pound" border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjm2R1HXoCbIOm3pGiZP1fHftj3knuOqqz7e-Ib0ja_0vAGsdGCHvbN7bERGptfKS82tOR2JCFCDE-k6LTbVP1-pzlWLMugj2I5qTz5jxYp7aX9UXiC3pMNVxli392JYPhCWA8buDzaL0A/s1600/fostering+buddy0005.JPG" title="Scrag snuggles a very happy Buddy in the car on our way home from picking him up from the pound" /></a></div>
<br />
So we headed to Pukekohe pound to pick him up. That poor puppy, he was so relieved to be let out of jail, he bounced all over us and I was mighty afraid. Already I was thinking, <i>what have I done?</i><br />
The snuggles seemed to settle him down, though.<br />
<i><br /></i>
Then Buddy met Clyde - and Clyde did not appreciate this small interloper, stealing hugs from his mummy (Miss Fab), stealing bones from his backyard, and refusing to submit and take his place at the bottom of the pile. Clyde was top dog, dammit! Why couldn't Buddy see that?<br />
There was immediate aggro from Clyde to Buddy, who slunk away and cowered inside. The aggro didn't let up. If Buddy came anywhere near Clyde, Clyde would round on him. How was I meant to go to work tomorrow and leave these two together? What was I thinking?<br />
<br />
We were such noobs we didn't know there was a protocol we should have followed to introduce the new puppy to our Clyde. He just bowled in and woofed, <i>Here I am!</i><br />
Poor Clyde was in shock. Poor Buddy just wanted to be loved and adored to make up for lost time.<br />
Poor mummy was panicking.<br />
<br />
Then Moose arrived. Moose is a giant Rottweiler belonging to a family member, who I said I'd dog sit for a few days til his new house was ready. Those few days turned out to be the day after Buddy joined us.<br />
I couldn't sleep the night before, for worrying. What was I thinking? Too late. I'd said yes, there was no other option.<br />
<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjN33OGAKFXQOGs32UQkVtpK9SP66tYZ0yc4gEFyUarOarIJboVCjjtjvuwbzYlAq5_gRUSxlC4NRlJYNMfMwvEzrLEe25n7aaSI9MUEeqe8BamtRLHEWXz7Adg6F_Ze2dBwixnY_4szTg/s1600/fostering+buddy0001.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="Moose is the sweetest dog in the world - he looks like a bear but he's really a teddy bear" border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjN33OGAKFXQOGs32UQkVtpK9SP66tYZ0yc4gEFyUarOarIJboVCjjtjvuwbzYlAq5_gRUSxlC4NRlJYNMfMwvEzrLEe25n7aaSI9MUEeqe8BamtRLHEWXz7Adg6F_Ze2dBwixnY_4szTg/s1600/fostering+buddy0001.JPG" title="Moose is the sweetest dog in the world - he looks like a bear but he's really a teddy bear" /></a></div>
<br />
Lucky that Moose is the sweetest dog you have ever met. He may be huge and scary-looking but he is a teddy bear, and so obedient he puts my naughty disobedient Clyde to shame.<br />
<br />
When Moose turned up the other dogs took one look at him and surrendered immediately. there was no question that Moose was Top Dog. Dog psychology is all about the pack hierarchy - Moose was unquestionably King of the back yard for the next four days, but that just left Buddy and Clyde scrapping it out - neither of them wanting to be on the bottom of the heap.<br />
<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjm8bE3QbB7cGYi_KvjdzXolZUa3BKNscjT_quGTs6U-isy6ujCKbqggVMLNwCmV2uoIFmYw5t5r5crynUspPkJERRzNMViI6a8OZqUm_lm1M8Irn5t-CK7rK1xCjBEqQBsbqKJvXBmGow/s1600/fostering+buddy0010.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="The gate was secure (I thought) til Buddy seemed to be able to jump it..." border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjm8bE3QbB7cGYi_KvjdzXolZUa3BKNscjT_quGTs6U-isy6ujCKbqggVMLNwCmV2uoIFmYw5t5r5crynUspPkJERRzNMViI6a8OZqUm_lm1M8Irn5t-CK7rK1xCjBEqQBsbqKJvXBmGow/s1600/fostering+buddy0010.JPG" title="The gate was secure (I thought) til Buddy seemed to be able to jump it..." /></a></div>
<br />
When it appeared that agile Buddy could also leap over the middle gate (and potentially escape the property) it was the final straw. I couldn't keep him safe - our usually gentle Clyde was rumbling him at every turn, and now he could run away if he so chose?<br />
<br />
I contacted the <a href="https://www.facebook.com/DC-Rescue-Dogs-357400844359301/" target="_blank">DC Rescue</a> people and begged for help, this fostering lark was a total fail.<br />
<br />
Except that it wasn't a TOTAL fail.<br />
Buddy really was sweet and affectionate and we were all falling totally in love with him. It was such a pain having to keep him and Clyde separated at all times, especially since the whole idea was that Clyde would have a buddy (ha, see what I did there?) but as for Buddy himself? Totally adorable. Completely lovable. Just... we loved him already.<br />
<br />
There was that one day, where Moose got tangled up in the soccer goal net and spent the afternoon howling and Buddy was tied up to the lemon tree (so he wouldn't escape and get hit by a car) and barking to be let off (while I was at work, my phone on silent, umpteen messages and missed calls from the neighbours)... that was the low point.<br />
<br />
But then I found out that Buddy couldn't actually LEAP the gate - he was just so skinny he could squeeze through the bars.<br />
<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgZfscmak4qr1-TacdA-uJCa-qN-odDfreOWMFfzre0wtaXuzFX45dg2E5gSwEEGS5KfPOzQVxFbbw9L4HhkSqX3QPcn_0cP6w27ujEK2qlGra2beYm1_kgq_SIhwi5jAv0i4LS-EVtKy0/s1600/fostering+buddy0008.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="Buddy Love" border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgZfscmak4qr1-TacdA-uJCa-qN-odDfreOWMFfzre0wtaXuzFX45dg2E5gSwEEGS5KfPOzQVxFbbw9L4HhkSqX3QPcn_0cP6w27ujEK2qlGra2beYm1_kgq_SIhwi5jAv0i4LS-EVtKy0/s1600/fostering+buddy0008.JPG" title="Buddy Love" /></a></div>
<br />
Not long after that, someone else put up their hand to foster Buddy and we were counting down the days til normalcy resumed.<br />
Actually it was just me doing that. the kids were counting down the hours they had left with Buddy, making the most of all his kisses and cuddles, the way he follows you everywhere and comes when you call. Ahhhhhh, Buddy. How could we not love you?<br />
Clyde! If only you loved Buddy too! Now that I've fixed the gate and made it secure, if only you'd accept Buddy and stop attacking him, maybe we could keep fostering him?<br />
<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjmm2J1SNrGslY6C2JAKOkL1_ty2w_Af92-5OLXKoaDFX0avzk-TvSkhRKF3A6sUfbpdi9ZbB_EeLPY3euQm8-eM5jajf3T-RRK7XO1ilo4Xx9H1nvg-4uDz0CqAN6oQ3mnUVU4Jm99lDw/s1600/josh+and+buddy.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="Dash and Buddy - it's total Buddy Love" border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjmm2J1SNrGslY6C2JAKOkL1_ty2w_Af92-5OLXKoaDFX0avzk-TvSkhRKF3A6sUfbpdi9ZbB_EeLPY3euQm8-eM5jajf3T-RRK7XO1ilo4Xx9H1nvg-4uDz0CqAN6oQ3mnUVU4Jm99lDw/s1600/josh+and+buddy.jpg" title="Dash and Buddy - it's total Buddy Love" /></a></div>
<br />
The kids were so upset with Clyde.<br />
"Why can't you two just get on?"<br />
"Why can't you be nice, Clyde?"<br />
"Clyde, I'm so disappointed in your attitude!"<br />
"Clyde, be nice to Buddy!"<br />
<br />
"Mum, it's so awful when they fight. It's so upsetting!"<br />
<i>Hmmmmm, yes it is. Maybe there's a talking point here?</i><br />
<i>"</i>Guys, you know how it makes you feel so upset when Buddy and Clyde don't get on?" <i>Nodding.</i><br />
"Well that's how I feel when you guys don't get on..."<br />
<br />
I can almost see the lightbulb going on over their heads. <i>This is what she's always going on about.</i><br />
<i><br /></i>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgmI07NWMlr4OZkKCZgauHbf2QvhgTJUu1DfrMlqhzJ0CDdxyzFJXK1bHVa4dFCuc0rzN890WupgsfeaVHJ_j23XgLRLQrkiYWRYEOkuUGvEUun6gELvO6peZDg8bkzbq_pQdda8KxduKA/s1600/fostering+buddy0014.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="Miss fab was this guy's mummy. She completely doted on him" border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgmI07NWMlr4OZkKCZgauHbf2QvhgTJUu1DfrMlqhzJ0CDdxyzFJXK1bHVa4dFCuc0rzN890WupgsfeaVHJ_j23XgLRLQrkiYWRYEOkuUGvEUun6gELvO6peZDg8bkzbq_pQdda8KxduKA/s1600/fostering+buddy0014.JPG" title="Miss fab was this guy's mummy. She completely doted on him" /></a></div>
<i><br /></i>
The day dawned, Saturday morning - we'd had Buddy for only five days but it felt like so much longer. We drove to meet his new foster-mum and it was bittersweet.<br />
There were tears, many many tears. Sobbing even. From more than one kid.<br />
We may not have had him for very long, but the kids packed so much love into Buddy in the five days he was with us, hopefully he'll have forgotten that he was ever neglected and abandoned in a garage.<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh4Jo90AOeLfCjnfqVwoSMZ3A8bA16EWHHEr-D8xWFYAdFmCTyc_9yGIXjcRdDmgOjCsSOlvfDVlLzcJ8BwEVCtCmgPEPmL-GFJByiY4cQ9_nXW_VM1Dh-x42LrPAq0s_eS_BRmi7EaZPU/s1600/fostering+buddy0017.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="Last Photos with Buddy AND Clyde before Buddy left" border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh4Jo90AOeLfCjnfqVwoSMZ3A8bA16EWHHEr-D8xWFYAdFmCTyc_9yGIXjcRdDmgOjCsSOlvfDVlLzcJ8BwEVCtCmgPEPmL-GFJByiY4cQ9_nXW_VM1Dh-x42LrPAq0s_eS_BRmi7EaZPU/s1600/fostering+buddy0017.JPG" title="Last Photos with Buddy AND Clyde before Buddy left" /></a></div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg2O4trmzXodh2ElxgvQqz562-pEbzWGpX47wh_g5h2RZSPa8EqgpQ0HntBh8jo319ug5PO383VUjRI_SktFqEZyua8aoYCDDnzqEAGfoqsst_X0QkM5Z0UmCS0xynzEpYVaZen0IjcKBs/s1600/fostering+buddy20002.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="We all love you Buddy (yes, in the end, even CLYDE)" border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg2O4trmzXodh2ElxgvQqz562-pEbzWGpX47wh_g5h2RZSPa8EqgpQ0HntBh8jo319ug5PO383VUjRI_SktFqEZyua8aoYCDDnzqEAGfoqsst_X0QkM5Z0UmCS0xynzEpYVaZen0IjcKBs/s1600/fostering+buddy20002.JPG" title="We all love you Buddy (yes, in the end, even CLYDE)" /></a></div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjGTFe5kZpSgozAajcfEMWBeb2orXpPZIUI6jIdlS6H1x-8jtXZKw6C1NRhoUqBMXUsjr-Zq5x_It0b2Tf_Ihq-mau_ekLhwIFMUvRa4s0I06rD-RN0rDgfBAMMLYTMdoN7JLXz6OaBs50/s1600/fostering+buddy20003.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="We still love you the most Clyde, of course, but we'll miss Buddy Heaps" border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjGTFe5kZpSgozAajcfEMWBeb2orXpPZIUI6jIdlS6H1x-8jtXZKw6C1NRhoUqBMXUsjr-Zq5x_It0b2Tf_Ihq-mau_ekLhwIFMUvRa4s0I06rD-RN0rDgfBAMMLYTMdoN7JLXz6OaBs50/s1600/fostering+buddy20003.JPG" title="We still love you the most Clyde, of course, but we'll miss Buddy Heaps" /></a></div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg3BRwHc4j-Dhyphenhyphent-DrwXEJkqX9B_ptWQZFDkmdjukuNXsuNhY5Zxp05L8Z-5fHqk4VfflcnAYk8kxs22es6hlHDIwUhYZAC0WGvlwkDQ9WBYZJ-nH5C1bvy2FgXe1qcFnPGnB-md6Cl3nI/s1600/fostering+buddy0023.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="Goodbye Buddy" border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg3BRwHc4j-Dhyphenhyphent-DrwXEJkqX9B_ptWQZFDkmdjukuNXsuNhY5Zxp05L8Z-5fHqk4VfflcnAYk8kxs22es6hlHDIwUhYZAC0WGvlwkDQ9WBYZJ-nH5C1bvy2FgXe1qcFnPGnB-md6Cl3nI/s1600/fostering+buddy0023.JPG" title="Goodbye Buddy" /></a></div>
<br />
Here's the strange part. Clyde is lost without Buddy. He's lonely. <i>He misses Buddy.</i><br />
<div>
<i><br /></i></div>
Ironically, in the 24-hours before we took Buddy to his new foster family, Clyde and Buddy made friends. Buddy accepted that Clyde was the boss, and Clyde accepted that Buddy was his buddy.<br />
They hung out, they played, there was no fighting. They even lay down together.<br />
<br />
Oh Clyde, Why couldn't you have done this sooner?<br />
Now Buddy is gone, Moose has gone to his new home and you're lonely.<br />
Things are back to normal and you miss the way things were for those few mad days.<br />
You miss living in a Dog Zoo.<br />
<br />
Me? Not so much.<br />
<br />
.........................<br />
<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg41hWE4BFVSROkz2yJKk9Tc4FBlTPop896795sx4X4e0OjyjONDaQ6kSHeUS-0bVE4-Od1IZ6tA7YqOQKgcsLBYl5gL2NVia20NVqpCw6UL_wYd-uBzSj2HvWd2_Hnm4XSV0FiLFY7Ejg/s1600/fostering+buddy0021.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="Buddy with his new foster-mum" border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg41hWE4BFVSROkz2yJKk9Tc4FBlTPop896795sx4X4e0OjyjONDaQ6kSHeUS-0bVE4-Od1IZ6tA7YqOQKgcsLBYl5gL2NVia20NVqpCw6UL_wYd-uBzSj2HvWd2_Hnm4XSV0FiLFY7Ejg/s1600/fostering+buddy0021.JPG" title="Buddy with his new foster-mum" /></a></div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEid_zZkGdukMozCNdl8RMBkbXn-CV6wpf7WTVlj3sebXCLTMhIjXGR8urNbehTR16sjnmgdGvwpW_qs8UsXlW3RSraznVZz2tS_TbxQM4I7-1QkpeSLrwaUHWOdCh5cRT4QvofKVMSugQc/s1600/fostering+buddy0019.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="Bye Bye Buddy *sniff sniff*" border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEid_zZkGdukMozCNdl8RMBkbXn-CV6wpf7WTVlj3sebXCLTMhIjXGR8urNbehTR16sjnmgdGvwpW_qs8UsXlW3RSraznVZz2tS_TbxQM4I7-1QkpeSLrwaUHWOdCh5cRT4QvofKVMSugQc/s1600/fostering+buddy0019.JPG" title="Bye Bye Buddy *sniff sniff*" /></a></div>
<br />
<span style="font-family: "courier new" , "courier" , monospace;">Buddy is super happy in his new foster home and there's a chance they may even adopt him. Our short-lived fostering adventure wasn't a total fail, because we all learnt a LOT - not just about dogs but about each other. About how pleasant it is when brothers and sisters live together in harmony.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "courier new" , "courier" , monospace;">Will we foster again? The kids all want to, of course. Me? Ummmmm, maybe when Clyde is a little older???</span><br />
<br />
<h2>
<span style="font-family: inherit;">MORE DOG TAILS</span></h2>
<div>
<ul>
<li><a href="http://www.greatfun4kidsblog.com/2016/07/hello-its-me-and-clyde-puppy.html" target="_blank">Introducing Clyde the Puppy</a></li>
<li><a href="http://www.greatfun4kidsblog.com/2016/11/what-kids-learn-from-having-dog.html" target="_blank">What Kids Learn From Having a Dog</a></li>
<li><a href="https://www.instagram.com/explore/tags/clydethepuppy/" target="_blank">Clyde the Puppy on Instagram</a></li>
</ul>
Our wonderful puppy, Clyde is a rescue puppy from <a href="https://www.facebook.com/DC-Rescue-Dogs-357400844359301/?fref=ts" target="_blank">DC Rescue Dogs</a>. I highly recommend DC Rescue as a wonderful organisation to adopt a puppy from. <span style="font-family: "courier new" , "courier" , monospace;">TO FIND OUT MORE ABOUT FOSTERING OR ADOPTING A RESCUE PUPPY CHECK OUT </span><a href="https://www.facebook.com/DC-Rescue-Dogs-357400844359301/" style="font-family: "Courier New", Courier, monospace;" target="_blank">DC RESCUE DOGS</a><span style="font-family: "courier new" , "courier" , monospace;">.</span></div>
Simoneyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09554122579485306611noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4940553413759896971.post-49377631199674130912017-02-03T11:33:00.001+13:002017-03-17T14:54:37.667+13:00When it feels like the World is Falling Apart...<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgyu5EJ8R8RnL4pkdepdZSHKtrDsa0vZindRfd3iOsJG1eA6-_MVYD4sR-7W5l-YT9pDO-VxMoHzboip9ZLlaiCkPZ2nbbNQnZyWMZ8vjHys-UMM97IJaRMQrp12gjvG7cINIbnGvDzUcE/s1600/slice+of+life0014.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="When it Feels like the world is falling apart..." border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgyu5EJ8R8RnL4pkdepdZSHKtrDsa0vZindRfd3iOsJG1eA6-_MVYD4sR-7W5l-YT9pDO-VxMoHzboip9ZLlaiCkPZ2nbbNQnZyWMZ8vjHys-UMM97IJaRMQrp12gjvG7cINIbnGvDzUcE/s1600/slice+of+life0014.JPG" title="When it Feels like the world is falling apart..." /></a></div>
<br />
I'm almost scared to check my news feed these days - what new soul-clenching, stomach churning madness has occurred while I was sleeping?<br />
You probably know the feeling.<br />
I have this urge to write, to vent, and get all the *grrrrr* off my chest, but do we really need another post like that cluttering up the interwebs? Another "this world is going to hell in a handbasket" opinion piece? I doubt it.<br />
<br />
Sigh.<br />
Chin up, I tell myself. This too shall pass.<br />
<br />
I've been sitting here at the bottom of the world watching the madness unfold, feeling shocked and sickened as the fundamentalist American Church aligns itself with the most reprehensible human being we've had on the world stage in a long time. Their endorsement of him is doing irreparable harm to the name of Christ (who I love and try to follow). Making excuses for his inexcusable behaviour is painting the rest of the followers of Jesus with an awful tarnished brush. What <i>they </i>call Christianity, and Christian values has <i>nothing </i>to do with Jesus.<br />
<a name='more'></a><br />
The Jesus of the Bible was not political - he refused to take up human power the way some of his followers wanted him to; he hung out with the outcasts and "sinners"; he told parables that exposed the hypocrisy of religious people who had no concern for the poor and needy, and he himself laid aside all wealth and power to come as a servant. He said, "In as much as you have done [good] to the the least of these, you have done it to me; in as much as you have <i>not </i>done [good] to the least of these you have <i>not </i>done it to me."<br />
<br />
(That "good" includes welcoming strangers. Just saying)<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiHcYqz-ylg5m69StpvjTVBpOhV6VwSkexjdY5Za-UZ2WPNKzgMCN8nuA9xqHMDGQlUe74x2bw_jheVfv__NYUUpNpdtE-p6K-n6-O3izDqmpuD1GfqjTgPCwvreuJLo_q08Ufr-9ec_EM/s1600/maxresdefault.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="Each one of them is Jesus in Disguise - Mother Theresa" border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiHcYqz-ylg5m69StpvjTVBpOhV6VwSkexjdY5Za-UZ2WPNKzgMCN8nuA9xqHMDGQlUe74x2bw_jheVfv__NYUUpNpdtE-p6K-n6-O3izDqmpuD1GfqjTgPCwvreuJLo_q08Ufr-9ec_EM/s1600/maxresdefault.jpg" title="Each one of them is Jesus in Disguise - Mother Theresa" width="750" /></a></div>
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We as Jesus' followers are meant to be following his example - that's what it means to be "christian" = being like Christ.<br />
<a href="http://johnpavlovitz.com/2017/02/02/its-time-we-stopped-calling-donald-trump-a-christian/" target="_blank">Donald Trump is not a Christian</a> (no matter what Dr James Dobson says) and it pains my heart that Christ's good name is being muddied by association. Just stop it already! It's sooooo embarrassing - I hope you know I'm not *that kind* of Christian??<br />
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I've been following <a href="http://johnpavlovitz.com/" target="_blank">John Pavlovitz</a> and <a href="http://annvoskamp.com/" target="_blank">Ann Voscamp</a> - two authentic American Christian voices who write with <a href="http://johnpavlovitz.com/2017/01/27/what-this-election-taught-me-about-my-privilege/" target="_blank">honesty</a>, <a href="http://annvoskamp.com/2017/01/a-painful-confession-how-do-christians-today-not-deny-or-trample-on-christ/" target="_blank">compassion</a> and <a href="http://johnpavlovitz.com/2017/01/06/because-eventually-you-have-to-get-off-the-fence/" target="_blank">wisdom</a>. I wish that the world got to hear more from people like <i>them</i> as representing Christ, instead of the angry, fear mongering, hate-filled voices that are so loud in support of that narcissistic orange guy that is now in charge of the nuke codes.<br />
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Oops. Sorry I wasn't going to go there was I?<br />
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OK, I'm back. Treading water and looking for the good. I really need to focus on the good, because as much as the outside world is a giant ugly mess, my private world is not much prettier, which really doesn't help.<br />
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<h2>
BUT IN SPITE OF THE MESS, I'M THANKFUL THAT...</h2>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgLWLJ3eVxfB_UAJJ1G1Ro9xnT0lHlW1DEuJAC2AhtQKxVprkvuQz1yLTaF0CR19TawdX-4DdYK5JSpoau9ObHMPR4a71ZAuSb-iIQvX_7GoCF0J75lX6vxRlTRSHph0qEGmEgeZGRFayw/s1600/slice+of+life0009.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="Clyde got hit by a car and lived to tell the tale" border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgLWLJ3eVxfB_UAJJ1G1Ro9xnT0lHlW1DEuJAC2AhtQKxVprkvuQz1yLTaF0CR19TawdX-4DdYK5JSpoau9ObHMPR4a71ZAuSb-iIQvX_7GoCF0J75lX6vxRlTRSHph0qEGmEgeZGRFayw/s1600/slice+of+life0009.JPG" title="Clyde got hit by a car and lived to tell the tale" /></a></div>
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.... even though Clyde, our beloved puppy, got hit by a car this week (!) he got up and walked away with just bruising (and a $200 vet bill, but let's not go there). Never mind that the car didn't stop, even though they hit him so hard their bumper came off. Never mind that naughty Clyde had slipped his head out of his too-loose collar and led us a merry chase onto the main road and dashed into live traffic.... (my heart nearly stopped as his life flashed before my eyes - we can't lose CLYDE?!?!)<br />
Well, his angels were working overtime, cos he's FINE now.<br />
That's something good right there, no?<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjeXeff310j73IaPZIc1muI0c3Llf2UzfuEaR22Qv9gbDk3jLys7_YNqx2J1KkzLdMYmTkR94vy8DdKboJL4EPxEj1ImEu90xGIjL8RwID8dtJ96A7ncWxBQYfb3rVqUlNHMZdjl-zylno/s1600/pantry.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="pantry declutter" border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjeXeff310j73IaPZIc1muI0c3Llf2UzfuEaR22Qv9gbDk3jLys7_YNqx2J1KkzLdMYmTkR94vy8DdKboJL4EPxEj1ImEu90xGIjL8RwID8dtJ96A7ncWxBQYfb3rVqUlNHMZdjl-zylno/s1600/pantry.jpg" title="pantry declutter" /></a></div>
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I'm thankful that I sorted out and prettified my pantry yesterday, hand-stamping labels for the jars and canisters and making it all look so Pinteresty. I haven't had the energy to get creative in a while, so it was a good and satisfying feeling.<br />
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I'm thankful the the eldest two are back into the school routine with no drama, and the eldest (in Year 10 at High School) actually said, "I think I'm going to enjoy school this year, mum."<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgTH4uV-JHRWPqavbudBlUssL5iXW7dDl7uQw5F1hOGqLwT8qBtRck2kKe_AYWFoGyVeXcrqtjhgUKYZPjnruitLSptFlVhyphenhyphen2kA_tF3MOiCkArBhbLNWV9zuja55fWO7d1H69E12rOkmB0/s1600/slice+of+life0010.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="Off to a new school next week..." border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgTH4uV-JHRWPqavbudBlUssL5iXW7dDl7uQw5F1hOGqLwT8qBtRck2kKe_AYWFoGyVeXcrqtjhgUKYZPjnruitLSptFlVhyphenhyphen2kA_tF3MOiCkArBhbLNWV9zuja55fWO7d1H69E12rOkmB0/s1600/slice+of+life0010.JPG" title="Off to a new school next week..." /></a></div>
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I'm thankful that Scrag has been given a scholarship to a new school for dyslexic children. He starts next week. SO THANKFUL!<br />
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Thankful that me and Scrag can enjoy making whirlpools in our backyard pool (the leaves all swirl into the centre and we can easily scoop them up!); thankful we are keeping the green at bay (Scrag is my pool buddy).<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiTjw1vXaEUzr5JljvH_GV9AOlwhqIdx6JEq4Miu6Sv-KJ9T-UYAZBS-5XWbMXoX28hJj5_bZ6k1wVtdGyPYeN0fGY_SwAQEI-osK0tktiXXlE8nJMRTaI3J9BxHGGcjjvvHibUZ_JJ4_I/s1600/slice+of+life0012.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="pool buddies" border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiTjw1vXaEUzr5JljvH_GV9AOlwhqIdx6JEq4Miu6Sv-KJ9T-UYAZBS-5XWbMXoX28hJj5_bZ6k1wVtdGyPYeN0fGY_SwAQEI-osK0tktiXXlE8nJMRTaI3J9BxHGGcjjvvHibUZ_JJ4_I/s1600/slice+of+life0012.JPG" title="pool buddies" /></a></div>
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I'm thankful that somehow I manage to keep going, even though at times I feel overwhelmed and alone; each day is a new fresh day and God gives me the strength I need to get through it.<br />
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Thankful that God gives me strength to not crumple under the weight of other people's judgments as they stand at a distance and question my decisions (without ever having walked a mile in my shoes). When harsh words come against me He comforts my heart, reminding me that <i>He </i>is my Defender, my advocate, my righteousness, my strength. He carries me and covers me; words of accusation and judgement don't have to sting - He is my Shield.<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjYw0_IkffjGnLCF917aF48Gi_RJfyGwupFUh-i4DFHd3J9-4zOfPOJI30fQ4brCh7r2BAYVhjCi3anDX3G9TzoyOpfrErSy0O8kBgjVwPHWrVGS_u2zeUxJgSmqAAwi5kqejTnov-aj4E/s1600/slice+of+life0002.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="Flowers from my girl" border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjYw0_IkffjGnLCF917aF48Gi_RJfyGwupFUh-i4DFHd3J9-4zOfPOJI30fQ4brCh7r2BAYVhjCi3anDX3G9TzoyOpfrErSy0O8kBgjVwPHWrVGS_u2zeUxJgSmqAAwi5kqejTnov-aj4E/s1600/slice+of+life0002.JPG" title="Flowers from my girl" /></a></div>
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I'm thankful that sometimes my kids are just amazing. Like yesterday as I sat on the phone to WINZ organising an emergency food grant (that vet bill really hurt!) my Scrag brought me a cup of coffee in the "World's Best Mum" cup and insisted I read it out loud. Then Fab went out and picked me flowers which she put in jars around the house, including one on my bedside table. Bless them; they are wonderful.<br />
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See, so somehow even though it might <i>feel</i> like the world is a big falling-apart mess, with too much judgement and not enough kindness, there is much to still be thankful for.<br />
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Yesterday I came across the loveliest thing - <a href="https://youtu.be/jD8tjhVO1Tc" target="_blank">a video from Denmark</a> which warmed my heart and reminded me that humans can be wonderful.<br />
This is what the world needs more of - a reminder that though on the surface of things, we may be different, there is so much more that we share in common.<br />
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Haven't seen it yet? <a href="https://youtu.be/jD8tjhVO1Tc" target="_blank">Take three minutes to watch</a>...<br />
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<iframe allowfullscreen="" frameborder="0" height="360" src="https://www.youtube.com/embed/jD8tjhVO1Tc" width="640"></iframe><br />
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There, wasn't that goosebumpy?<br />
I needed that.<br />
We're in this together, people. Lets be kind whenever we can, remembering that:<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgIMQibioD3fhXvXzokAuDWav7iouW1dOGQzkfCpkA__sIzj2lx5n5Iky41xNjG35WHWF4LXf7HUriUP35iCem-z-2Ptii6oNnBz0DKs-xCeYAUdryNyF-BTMrkxMvnsXqF1XtZJtqOnU8/s1600/kindess+quote.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="Be kind" border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgIMQibioD3fhXvXzokAuDWav7iouW1dOGQzkfCpkA__sIzj2lx5n5Iky41xNjG35WHWF4LXf7HUriUP35iCem-z-2Ptii6oNnBz0DKs-xCeYAUdryNyF-BTMrkxMvnsXqF1XtZJtqOnU8/s1600/kindess+quote.jpg" title="Be kind" /></a></div>
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Yep, this was a bit of a mish-mash post; sorry about that. But aint that life?!<br />
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<h2>
HOW <u>YOU</u> DOIN'???</h2>
Simoneyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09554122579485306611noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4940553413759896971.post-72130058456428894282017-01-19T13:53:00.003+13:002017-03-17T14:54:32.465+13:00Camping Solo: A Summer Adventure<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjx0hDD1tof4v_bkGCn1lfJzoPmgteWqQ7X3O4-fuUASFfublV2_1KWoMzzEpn4awvalj4GIkf0mOTzDMxlSTRHjGz1KDQ2NLSQ1o4ZEwGsZF_Cgh7umBUnQ9u0ebgZPb1DpmkVz2CATWE/s1600/on+the+beach.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="Caming Solo and Other Summer Adventures" border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjx0hDD1tof4v_bkGCn1lfJzoPmgteWqQ7X3O4-fuUASFfublV2_1KWoMzzEpn4awvalj4GIkf0mOTzDMxlSTRHjGz1KDQ2NLSQ1o4ZEwGsZF_Cgh7umBUnQ9u0ebgZPb1DpmkVz2CATWE/s1600/on+the+beach.JPG" title="Caming Solo and Other Summer Adventures" /></a></div>
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There was <a href="http://www.greatfun4kidsblog.com/2016/10/taking-stock-cos-thats-what-i-do-when.html" target="_blank">a time not so very long ago </a>when I stared at the blank canvas of the summer holidays and worried how on earth I would fill it for my kids this year - me, a mum on her own.<br />
I prayed for miracles, a way to go on holiday, provision - and lo and behold, miracles happened. Somehow dollars stretched and opportunities opened up, and here we are, in the middle of a very busy un-boring summer, where the kids have had a ball and I've learned, once again, that I CAN DO HARD THINGS.<br />
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Hard things like facing New Years Eve without a party (gulp), but still managing to toast marshmallows and let off fireworks. Like driving for eight-hours-straight with a car full of kids and a dog to visit family down-country (sustained by $1 frozen McD's drinks). And like squeezing all our camping gear into the car, setting up a tent with not a bloke in sight, camping for a week and then packing it all down again and squishing it all back in the car, with only the kids to help.<br />
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This summer has been like an endurance test - a test of my mettle. Especially THE CAMPING.<br />
I wouldn't say it was the most fun, relaxing camping trip we've ever been on but <i>I did it</i>. WE did it.<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgm1ZLIY9aEj3WNtdtvpgVCrxaxQWd2bAtY9-9zf0HpcfosLM3KtnIAWxgK5N2bkssgn0efYxShWAywMuUlZJprvrHwesh2tTUGb1PWvIOo0PdU46rmUSKxy094l4byab-JQnEAMx7stDA/s1600/Summer+20170044.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="Heading to Martin's Bay, New Zealand" border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgm1ZLIY9aEj3WNtdtvpgVCrxaxQWd2bAtY9-9zf0HpcfosLM3KtnIAWxgK5N2bkssgn0efYxShWAywMuUlZJprvrHwesh2tTUGb1PWvIOo0PdU46rmUSKxy094l4byab-JQnEAMx7stDA/s1600/Summer+20170044.JPG" title="Heading to Martin's Bay, New Zealand" /></a></div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhCl7Ii_pzx5P706c3rrzEQNsQuJgMpl_6oGIzptObNY7mCTYTxu-BElf08TPTR-p1A0FtYWcaHU6thX8nc1ABAWEh5G93uL_M9VuwJzPvrj88XuDQ5D1OFIPkVjegZ-0ZMk-N_GsXPxyc/s1600/Summer+20170002.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="Camping holiday" border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhCl7Ii_pzx5P706c3rrzEQNsQuJgMpl_6oGIzptObNY7mCTYTxu-BElf08TPTR-p1A0FtYWcaHU6thX8nc1ABAWEh5G93uL_M9VuwJzPvrj88XuDQ5D1OFIPkVjegZ-0ZMk-N_GsXPxyc/s1600/Summer+20170002.JPG" title="Camping holiday" /></a></div>
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Somehow I managed to squeeze the essentials - plus the four of us - into our people mover, and get us to our favourite campground. Then we set it all up - and it stayed up!<br />
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That's our tent there in the middle - the <a href="http://www.greatfun4kidsblog.com/2016/01/a-tent-odyssey.html" target="_blank">grey Kathmandu palace</a> that is so easy to erect even me and the kids can manage it. (We had a different spot this year to<a href="http://www.greatfun4kidsblog.com/2016/01/a-tent-odyssey.html" target="_blank"> our usual</a> - look how close we are to the beach!)<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjallO9hHne8TgvXfograyshl_lBsHFbV9o8TafG_i-v2RkNxJiyKd5wLfc2h-6MzWkF1fGKgs0pABNaDdzstVBVi16PW-9OOZzXPZyUZJkWscHWGbPM3ilS-ZT6caaLlWtbqDjHMyNdhY/s1600/Summer+20170006.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="Beachfront campsite - Martins' Bay New Zealand" border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjallO9hHne8TgvXfograyshl_lBsHFbV9o8TafG_i-v2RkNxJiyKd5wLfc2h-6MzWkF1fGKgs0pABNaDdzstVBVi16PW-9OOZzXPZyUZJkWscHWGbPM3ilS-ZT6caaLlWtbqDjHMyNdhY/s1600/Summer+20170006.JPG" title="Beachfront campsite - Martins' Bay New Zealand" /></a></div>
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There is a kitchen at the campground, but we prefer to wash dishes and cook <i>al fresco </i>(and this beautiful girl is my best helper...)<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgP65zln-jt5ym0zJ1UxoVveJWGSUNvHpm85G0YXDxVioQVN5GIgocxrc3meUggnunv5FTv-7QkK-OQcvvHMEos81o0wybeSaDt4nxrqlfxdXppdfVbUSk1o95261ndWLRkSSFpIc135O4/s1600/Summer+20170025.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="Doing the dishes isn't such a chore when you do it here" border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgP65zln-jt5ym0zJ1UxoVveJWGSUNvHpm85G0YXDxVioQVN5GIgocxrc3meUggnunv5FTv-7QkK-OQcvvHMEos81o0wybeSaDt4nxrqlfxdXppdfVbUSk1o95261ndWLRkSSFpIc135O4/s1600/Summer+20170025.JPG" title="Doing the dishes isn't such a chore when you do it here" /></a></div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhhXAmnpLbKy0wsDfN5f-GZKAZvC_7qQ686H1zdx0e9-x0Enl4HGCyR9_Y0GcX4vEcQ7ueW2AGXoQ-AkdpbrgYYD35z67t0R_i7-hkg71pk4TrTPS4uMggW_B-MoZRytcU7HVnF-lEuSuE/s1600/Summer+20170029.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="Bacon and eggs for dinner, cooked al fresco on our camp stove" border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhhXAmnpLbKy0wsDfN5f-GZKAZvC_7qQ686H1zdx0e9-x0Enl4HGCyR9_Y0GcX4vEcQ7ueW2AGXoQ-AkdpbrgYYD35z67t0R_i7-hkg71pk4TrTPS4uMggW_B-MoZRytcU7HVnF-lEuSuE/s1600/Summer+20170029.JPG" title="Bacon and eggs for dinner, cooked al fresco on our camp stove" /></a></div>
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You might be wondering how we fitted everything - plus four people - into a people mover. Yep, I was wondering that myself! (<i>Very. Carefully.</i>)<br />
Tent, tarp, fridge, mats, chairs, camp stretchers, mattresses, sleeping bags, pillows, bags, food, chilly bin, tables - somehow it all fitted.<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjCIY8LaM5z83FizzjpkY9ljcb9OrST-YkPq7cNwpUanIkmL1Rwn2uIbkOjhcqcUkHCrZmJ0V1nMhx9ukwyanWgA-A8u_SFP5_4xbHY9y5UJPo5_l4ji4b8UINdI0mXs30i2zG5eCrtbR4/s1600/Summer+20170032.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="How on earth did we fit it all in???" border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjCIY8LaM5z83FizzjpkY9ljcb9OrST-YkPq7cNwpUanIkmL1Rwn2uIbkOjhcqcUkHCrZmJ0V1nMhx9ukwyanWgA-A8u_SFP5_4xbHY9y5UJPo5_l4ji4b8UINdI0mXs30i2zG5eCrtbR4/s1600/Summer+20170032.JPG" title="How on earth did we fit it all in???" /></a></div>
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Ahhhh, Martin's Bay. that view never gets old.<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgoSZUFn0h4ITX85KW51okybXpDArpUL_98H7okRmlog_72WaLwv9ITTfdS72WHc6_cmEd6Bp46_Pbe_VN2jC7H2OsltksDjdUrr4IqfBlM9Z-fqCNDxhYgA9WOtyRGl12gNndmGhOFpdU/s1600/Summer+20170040.JPG" imageanchor="1"><img alt="Heading down the hill to Martin's Bay" border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgoSZUFn0h4ITX85KW51okybXpDArpUL_98H7okRmlog_72WaLwv9ITTfdS72WHc6_cmEd6Bp46_Pbe_VN2jC7H2OsltksDjdUrr4IqfBlM9Z-fqCNDxhYgA9WOtyRGl12gNndmGhOFpdU/s1600/Summer+20170040.JPG" title="Heading down the hill to Martin's Bay" /></a></div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiXTvVWvg9Tv19PNTIY4aeGjk9OXXyyR_8FIBJcyfSyET4KOMT-_GdWD1FD-uPRwX-DCcNhFo4EVtDWIpqzaByyjk3bsSNtzrO_qcdtyyPrvolVvJCI4mC6klK7P02vu63MzlyZV-8Z2WM/s1600/Summer+20170086.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="Camp kitchen" border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiXTvVWvg9Tv19PNTIY4aeGjk9OXXyyR_8FIBJcyfSyET4KOMT-_GdWD1FD-uPRwX-DCcNhFo4EVtDWIpqzaByyjk3bsSNtzrO_qcdtyyPrvolVvJCI4mC6klK7P02vu63MzlyZV-8Z2WM/s1600/Summer+20170086.JPG" title="Camp kitchen" /></a></div>
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This is our cooking/living area - fridge with food, chilly bin with iced drinks. Electric jug and toaster; a carton of drinking water on tap; collapsible shelves to store food. Moon chairs for relaxing in; fairy lights for at night (practical AND pretty) and a low table for playing games and cards. What more could you want? (Um, my coffee machine? Too bad there wasn't room.)</div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhyahwzVQdP7B-lFtEfnNMl43MZ-uV5D2qpluxehBpqDMWnMoJ0Ev2xwMHE6dlCkHs6LtnyHHVZHJrDb9DxELZt2Cjf8rp9t6u26yI-yMvGDQpdUIyZDYp3oA2TUsbma8pZwmZMQanPaU8/s1600/Summer+20170088.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="moon chairs for comfort" border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhyahwzVQdP7B-lFtEfnNMl43MZ-uV5D2qpluxehBpqDMWnMoJ0Ev2xwMHE6dlCkHs6LtnyHHVZHJrDb9DxELZt2Cjf8rp9t6u26yI-yMvGDQpdUIyZDYp3oA2TUsbma8pZwmZMQanPaU8/s1600/Summer+20170088.JPG" title="moon chairs for comfort" /></a></div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiwdVVTdJ4sxy68Ypy-hAC8dPVvKI0tCF2ygr7rl19rnGVsLMXUBAelA8JgGp-mvYcmQigG4xzjzZ6Bd7OKnja3h9lOCTvvANfBCxhA23jeO6fSZBUGSmiPdxvFnf3Dj24gCFkdSroKPQ4/s1600/Summer+20170047.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="Gorgeous Riverside cafe - Matakana Market Kitchen" border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiwdVVTdJ4sxy68Ypy-hAC8dPVvKI0tCF2ygr7rl19rnGVsLMXUBAelA8JgGp-mvYcmQigG4xzjzZ6Bd7OKnja3h9lOCTvvANfBCxhA23jeO6fSZBUGSmiPdxvFnf3Dj24gCFkdSroKPQ4/s1600/Summer+20170047.JPG" title="Gorgeous Riverside cafe - Matakana Market Kitchen" /></a></div>
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Poor Ab Fab got an ear infection in the middle of our camping trip (poor thing), so it was off to the doctor in Warkworth. While we waited for an appointment, we headed to our fave riverside cafe (Matakana Market Kitchen) where the sparrows are pretty darn cheeky and the cakes are divine...<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi2jHzDR1dzkkl-64vH0q5YW7p_HIXY6znDbFgBA1c9B6ztkIdfzHTsWw1TqC1jxfTCZ9EihrFuhoNC6cKWTFHS3RiB7vq3lOxpEG9sBW_Cs2jD6FwC7Ipgfy_AU284Wze5Ywnvj-LWFZY/s1600/Summer+20170046.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="Cheeky sparrows want Miss fab's cinnamon Brioche..." border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi2jHzDR1dzkkl-64vH0q5YW7p_HIXY6znDbFgBA1c9B6ztkIdfzHTsWw1TqC1jxfTCZ9EihrFuhoNC6cKWTFHS3RiB7vq3lOxpEG9sBW_Cs2jD6FwC7Ipgfy_AU284Wze5Ywnvj-LWFZY/s1600/Summer+20170046.JPG" title="Cheeky sparrows want Miss fab's cinnamon Brioche..." /></a></div>
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We were lucky to have friends who have a permanent caravan here - they're <a href="http://www.greatfun4kidsblog.com/2009/01/camping-we-will-go.html" target="_blank">the ones who introduced us to this spot</a> when Scrag was a baby and we've been coming here every summer since. This year our friends had a new toy - a jet ski and sea biscuit! What an adventure that was.<br />
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(And yes I did go on. And yes, I did fall off. And then fail to get back on again. And then had to be rescued by a guy on a jet ski. And yes the kids did laugh. <i>hahahahaha</i>.)<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEguq2FgP5V408UPSA4_mvBaGqgdS8INSj1WApUKAuszBjTclPo79v69fTEHIrHgWIuKbxP5mADrborozrg1-7kq1HGJXNcyBuDaFRzAUw0_sHRM8pdZgpwBPxYpP-oj9ScPRzfOhaH_BeI/s1600/Summer+20170053.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="Martin's Bay beach, New Zealand" border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEguq2FgP5V408UPSA4_mvBaGqgdS8INSj1WApUKAuszBjTclPo79v69fTEHIrHgWIuKbxP5mADrborozrg1-7kq1HGJXNcyBuDaFRzAUw0_sHRM8pdZgpwBPxYpP-oj9ScPRzfOhaH_BeI/s1600/Summer+20170053.JPG" title="Martin's Bay beach, New Zealand" /></a></div>
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Ahhhhh, this view. You just never get tired of it. It's like soul sustenance, and makes all the hauling of gear worth it, to be camped right here, being greeted by this every morning.<br />
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Like I said, it was not the most <strike>enjoyable </strike>restful holiday I've ever had. Being the only adult in charge of everything when you're living in a tent is not easy! That could explain why everyone else at the campground seemed to come equipped with both a mum AND a dad - I didn't see any other sole mums camping there. (Is that a thing? Do people think camping is just for dads? Do sole mums go camping other places? I don't know.)<br />
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Sole-parent camping is not easy, but it is do-able if you can cajole your offspring into working like some kind of team, instead of thinking they're at a hotel - no room-service or chamber-maids here!<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiva9LohwdZU-KdKDr0AiR9IDZYYQQn7lg8hwqqfqZLxESDj7xAJZDwH2uDN4B7mMw3BFrrWuOoyCFiin7p2Lu0IOgPj9xVVB0m3IlrlHCoWnB1xTYArFNAExMdmpfBinUbLUhjDEbuzXs/s1600/Summer+20170058.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="Endless rounds of cards by candlelight" border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiva9LohwdZU-KdKDr0AiR9IDZYYQQn7lg8hwqqfqZLxESDj7xAJZDwH2uDN4B7mMw3BFrrWuOoyCFiin7p2Lu0IOgPj9xVVB0m3IlrlHCoWnB1xTYArFNAExMdmpfBinUbLUhjDEbuzXs/s1600/Summer+20170058.JPG" title="Endless rounds of cards by candlelight" /></a></div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiPQw3F1mdkzYZZpD1z2MqrHk7Na19PPmIn_IUHgNGZHLOiZ2ZTBgOkxVSx_iE7TK4cBk_cbZUMWpBt9uGWhcPt1WPDKUOCyM8rPknlnYpHy6PM67_2Ho5tAaN9l9GaPIpRFo_l86SqWN0/s1600/Summer+20170015.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiPQw3F1mdkzYZZpD1z2MqrHk7Na19PPmIn_IUHgNGZHLOiZ2ZTBgOkxVSx_iE7TK4cBk_cbZUMWpBt9uGWhcPt1WPDKUOCyM8rPknlnYpHy6PM67_2Ho5tAaN9l9GaPIpRFo_l86SqWN0/s1600/Summer+20170015.JPG" /></a></div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjeSj6ekkyirds-CXfgKBn0vcUre_FKGFhF2Eu5KrQcr3slGPPNib2ZPlp9mugoWnc0zd-fa3LMhC0X0lyFuf-NZL0oA0viPZEhaDIOsMUDFoINX965ZQbiyKY5lXKhWl1neOHnzaMSj7s/s1600/Summer+20170037.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="Coca cola, on ice, at the beach because SUMMER" border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjeSj6ekkyirds-CXfgKBn0vcUre_FKGFhF2Eu5KrQcr3slGPPNib2ZPlp9mugoWnc0zd-fa3LMhC0X0lyFuf-NZL0oA0viPZEhaDIOsMUDFoINX965ZQbiyKY5lXKhWl1neOHnzaMSj7s/s1600/Summer+20170037.JPG" title="Coca cola, on ice, at the beach because SUMMER" /></a></div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjEfkHYzaoh3ZhNaOKtzTs6IPYUWdN0wh3AcMd-2lu1DUSXDcfwvouvZe0dJeQGjF-qWz2ft7wDCQzmZpUKHyW3D_OdPvjuQ04QxDnyRYk4eqQkDzY7BkGfCtcvQzQduK7dEJSlz9P-o54/s1600/Summer+20170075.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="Chair vs tide: the chair challenge (we did not win)" border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjEfkHYzaoh3ZhNaOKtzTs6IPYUWdN0wh3AcMd-2lu1DUSXDcfwvouvZe0dJeQGjF-qWz2ft7wDCQzmZpUKHyW3D_OdPvjuQ04QxDnyRYk4eqQkDzY7BkGfCtcvQzQduK7dEJSlz9P-o54/s1600/Summer+20170075.JPG" title="Chair vs tide: the chair challenge (we did not win)" /></a></div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhfBb194UU31oLP-D3k79sLjXj3qh1CUmH-xFtjn2vn1wzYIMLoOh4OSogR9AErI2Yhkkid0TWvBgq3d71HTCsszfs06fdftkxNGgCwl8hJc1pBqymHvYMNompp3VyOrvLs9SPN2Z1iMT4/s1600/Summer+20170013.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="Packdown awesomeness (we beat the dad next door)" border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhfBb194UU31oLP-D3k79sLjXj3qh1CUmH-xFtjn2vn1wzYIMLoOh4OSogR9AErI2Yhkkid0TWvBgq3d71HTCsszfs06fdftkxNGgCwl8hJc1pBqymHvYMNompp3VyOrvLs9SPN2Z1iMT4/s1600/Summer+20170013.JPG" title="Packdown awesomeness (we beat the dad next door)" /></a></div>
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(Awwwww look at that - packing up the tent like a boss team!)<br />
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The verdict on sole parent camping: would I do it again?<br />
Yes, I would - in fact we're already booked in for next year.<br />
But next time we're going with friends, another mum and kids, camping beachfront,<br />
It will be loads more enjoyable for me with a friend along.<br />
Half the load and twice the fun, right? It's even in the Good Book...<br />
<div class="poetry top-05" style="box-sizing: border-box; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em; margin-top: 1em; padding-left: 2.6em; position: relative;">
<div class="line" style="-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased; background-color: white; box-sizing: border-box; font-size: 16px; line-height: 24px;">
<span style="font-family: "courier new" , "courier" , monospace;"><span class="text Eccl-4-9" id="en-NIV-17391" style="-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased; box-sizing: border-box; position: relative;">"Two are better than one,</span><span class="indent-1" style="-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased; box-sizing: border-box;"><span class="indent-1-breaks" style="-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased; box-sizing: border-box; font-size: 0.42em; line-height: 0;"> </span><span class="text Eccl-4-9" style="-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased; box-sizing: border-box; position: relative;">because they have a good return for their labor: </span></span></span><span style="font-family: "courier new" , "courier" , monospace;">If either of them falls down,</span><span style="font-family: "courier new" , "courier" , monospace;">one can help the other up."</span></div>
<h1 class="passage-display" style="background-color: white; box-sizing: border-box; font-weight: 500; line-height: 1.1; margin: 0px 0px 20px;">
<span class="passage-display-bcv" style="-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased; box-sizing: border-box; display: inline; margin: 0px; padding-right: 10px;"><span style="font-family: "courier new" , "courier" , monospace; font-size: small;">{Ecclesiastes 4:9-10, NIV version}</span></span></h1>
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<span class="passage-display-bcv" style="-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased; box-sizing: border-box; display: inline; margin: 0px; padding-right: 10px;"><span style="font-size: x-small;"><br /></span></span></div>
OR in other words...</div>
<blockquote class="tr_bq" style="box-sizing: border-box; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em; margin-top: 1em; padding-left: 2.6em; position: relative;">
<span style="font-family: "courier new" , "courier" , monospace;">"Two are better than one, because if one tent falls down the other mum can help her friend put it up again; if one mum's kid is refusing to help with the dishes, the other mum can back her up; if one mum wants a glass of wine but doesn't want to drink alone, the other friend can keep her company and they can sip Pinot Gris as they watch the kids playing on the beach at sunset together..."</span> </blockquote>
<blockquote class="tr_bq" style="box-sizing: border-box; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em; margin-top: 1em; padding-left: 2.6em; position: relative;">
<span style="font-family: "courier new" , "courier" , monospace;">{Ecclesiastes-ish, Simoney Version}</span></blockquote>
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<span style="font-size: large;">Yep, sounds good to me. Roll on Camping 2018.</span></div>
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<b>OTHER CAMPING ADVENTURES:</b></div>
<div class="poetry top-05" style="box-sizing: border-box; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em; margin-top: 1em; padding-left: 2.6em; position: relative;">
<ul>
<li><a href="http://www.greatfun4kidsblog.com/2016/01/a-tent-odyssey.html" target="_blank">A Tent Odyssey</a></li>
<li><a href="http://www.greatfun4kidsblog.com/2014/02/camping-or-glamping.html" target="_blank">Camping or Glamping?</a></li>
<li><a href="http://www.greatfun4kidsblog.com/2009/01/camping-we-will-go.html" target="_blank">A-camping We Will Go (2009)</a></li>
<li><a href="http://www.greatfun4kidsblog.com/2010/01/clown-camping.html" target="_blank">Clown Camping (2010)</a></li>
<li><a href="http://www.greatfun4kidsblog.com/2013/01/we-survived-nine-days-camping-it-can-be.html" target="_blank">We Survived Nine Days Camping (2013)</a></li>
<li><a href="http://www.greatfun4kidsblog.com/2013/01/ww-where-kids-attempt-beach-tryathlon.html" target="_blank">Beach Tryathlon (2013)</a></li>
<li><a href="http://www.greatfun4kidsblog.com/2012/05/under-canvas.html" target="_blank"><span style="font-size: medium;">Under Canvas (Backyard Camping)</span></a></li>
</ul>
</div>
Simoneyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09554122579485306611noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4940553413759896971.post-22826399628168327092016-12-31T12:48:00.001+13:002017-03-17T14:54:26.571+13:00Good Riddance 2016 (but Thanks for not Killing Me)<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi8L8KW_EY4cvwIcXMhbNPQldEJWA6666KBxhbdvTzLZzcD_Ra2_tQIYc8KRx6udT6C7l8Irt9diCwRysH7wEpA2-PYVjs-8McJINiOtm9GJlCs9tHOqk3_cmjftHXEHx0MKw01carmvCI/s1600/christmas20160013.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="Goodbye and Good Riddance 2016" border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi8L8KW_EY4cvwIcXMhbNPQldEJWA6666KBxhbdvTzLZzcD_Ra2_tQIYc8KRx6udT6C7l8Irt9diCwRysH7wEpA2-PYVjs-8McJINiOtm9GJlCs9tHOqk3_cmjftHXEHx0MKw01carmvCI/s1600/christmas20160013.jpg" title="Goodbye and Good Riddance 2016" /></a></div>
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Today is the last day of this bloody awful year. It has been without a doubt the hardest year of my life - yet strangely it hasn't actually been <i>the worst year. </i><br />
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Why? Because I'm finishing the year a stronger person than I began it. <br />
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My faith in God has been tested, and strengthened, because He has not failed me yet.</div>
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I've lost friends along the way, but discovered others whose worth is pure gold. </div>
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I've had to learn to fill the roles of both mum and dad - and have since realised how incredible single mums are.<br />
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There are so many of us out there, doing the hard yards, unseen and alone, but rocking parenting in spite of the endless challenges - in spite of incredibly tight budgets, the (unfair and untrue) judgments of others and the sheer relentlessness of doing life on our own. </div>
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I am in awe of the strength of women, and single mums in particular.</div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhw-Yy9sU0Iq-BfdTwrgFqHYzh0hVD-Mnabi1uA3-J8uJPQxe0sFWaNMTVp3jTFWVEy01e3nDBWSXE4YEVPgDeEDyBni0cgjbCJ9RU8s3sknjKxW-UfwI7QmW89SQbqRzJDWnuk99kmZco/s1600/goodbye+20160002.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="Me and Scrag - hammock time" border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhw-Yy9sU0Iq-BfdTwrgFqHYzh0hVD-Mnabi1uA3-J8uJPQxe0sFWaNMTVp3jTFWVEy01e3nDBWSXE4YEVPgDeEDyBni0cgjbCJ9RU8s3sknjKxW-UfwI7QmW89SQbqRzJDWnuk99kmZco/s1600/goodbye+20160002.JPG" title="Me and Scrag - hammock time" /></a></div>
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Where once I deep-down believed that I was broken, weak and incapable, I've discovered that I am strong, fierce and determined when it comes to protecting and providing for my kids.</div>
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I've learnt that I can do hard things, too.<br />
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I can hold down a job (and rock it), pay the bills on time, maintain a property (and keep a pool from turning green) and care for our pets, on top of being a listening ear and soft place for my kids, supporting them while navigating puberty, ADHD and dyslexia and getting them through a school year in one piece. I can put food on the table, keep the household running and create a peaceful, welcoming home environment for them (where they can feel free to bring their friends).<br />
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I've faced <a href="http://www.greatfun4kidsblog.com/2016/11/how-to-throw-party-for-your-teenager.html" target="_blank">birthdays</a> and <a href="http://www.greatfun4kidsblog.com/2016/12/surviving-and-enjoying-christmas.html" target="_blank">Christmas</a> alone - and lived to tell the tale.</div>
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All of this while working through my own emotions at <a href="http://www.greatfun4kidsblog.com/2016/09/twists-turns-on-rollercoaster.html" target="_blank">the loss of the dream</a>, and a new reality.</div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg6hosSRWpzjDwQ-lJ6CfypNzmD-AG6BHwrvs4fx2eKGcmlh-0tOkJOyW-ZV513KqBM-GAoepFAJ_msmEY2Td5IXWWi-cH6LqqCpWsn19mag61obZULsVLxDY5LrPtp8gRLQaxFdXuij9Q/s1600/goodbye+20160001.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="Cruisin with Santa Clyde" border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg6hosSRWpzjDwQ-lJ6CfypNzmD-AG6BHwrvs4fx2eKGcmlh-0tOkJOyW-ZV513KqBM-GAoepFAJ_msmEY2Td5IXWWi-cH6LqqCpWsn19mag61obZULsVLxDY5LrPtp8gRLQaxFdXuij9Q/s1600/goodbye+20160001.JPG" title="Cruisin with Santa Clyde" /></a></div>
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I've faced down my insecurities over other people's judgments of me, and found a new place to stand tall. <i>This is huge</i>. Since forever I've battled the "disease to please" - but <a href="http://www.greatfun4kidsblog.com/2016/09/twists-turns-on-rollercoaster.html" target="_blank">in this situation</a> where there are some people who really honestly think I'm a horrible person for the decisions I've made I've had to learn how to be OK anyway. </div>
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I've had to dig deep and push through and keep putting one foot in front of the other while my soul was held together by sticky tape. </div>
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It was either push through or fall apart; get strong or fail those who need me; hold it together or lose everything. </div>
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So, yep, I'm joining the masses who can't wait to see the back of this dumpster fire of a year, but at least the pain hasn't been a total loss, cos what didn't kill me, really has made me stronger.</div>
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<h2>
THE LOVELY BITS, LATELY:<br />Our amazing Swiss Homestay, Carina.</h2>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh3xYOBTavE8kJu7eUtaZJ1kTQszUrw40o-fWBeJxpiRVw98WSY4PN1g1OOqW4kS0YMm_Bd964OaDBQKaIyN9JyjJ-cNXOLKzZgNHZSPmE-Oybbuo3l6kNPoHLRnPzIUoJ3d-6xjQEwI_o/s1600/goodbye+20160004.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="Miss Fab loved having a "big sister" " border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh3xYOBTavE8kJu7eUtaZJ1kTQszUrw40o-fWBeJxpiRVw98WSY4PN1g1OOqW4kS0YMm_Bd964OaDBQKaIyN9JyjJ-cNXOLKzZgNHZSPmE-Oybbuo3l6kNPoHLRnPzIUoJ3d-6xjQEwI_o/s1600/goodbye+20160004.JPG" title="Miss Fab loved having a "big sister" " /></a></div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhwaGVSjd6FaYK4ctBYY6rUIhLXgZh5FjIn6kVDQ1kXJ007SOOmpmQe4D1QifUvhK7MUnVsGFAWBGyo9SoCaiQm29E2p2n0SPqM8QVPO5ldoIHLY52K4IHOoCC5MLOCFQWEm8Fu79GGAPE/s1600/goodbye+20160009.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="Carina mentoring Scrag on how to make pancakes" border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhwaGVSjd6FaYK4ctBYY6rUIhLXgZh5FjIn6kVDQ1kXJ007SOOmpmQe4D1QifUvhK7MUnVsGFAWBGyo9SoCaiQm29E2p2n0SPqM8QVPO5ldoIHLY52K4IHOoCC5MLOCFQWEm8Fu79GGAPE/s1600/goodbye+20160009.JPG" title="Carina mentoring Scrag on how to make pancakes" /></a></div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhzHbgL20urWkmNRI6X16kBQARmGG7AbCJ0i2c13wg12g_evxg_RpGoQWfUVfyyB4NlIaTvx6rIkd6BXE9rw1X4GkWt9uNffgeixwmcVeZlARMZbdc6rI3K-6j7L4CHwUKEpkvyPqkE5EM/s1600/goodbye+20160010.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="Oh yum - Pancakes with nutella, strwberries, banana and cream!" border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhzHbgL20urWkmNRI6X16kBQARmGG7AbCJ0i2c13wg12g_evxg_RpGoQWfUVfyyB4NlIaTvx6rIkd6BXE9rw1X4GkWt9uNffgeixwmcVeZlARMZbdc6rI3K-6j7L4CHwUKEpkvyPqkE5EM/s1600/goodbye+20160010.JPG" title="Oh yum - Pancakes with nutella, strwberries, banana and cream!" /></a></div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjxKFBZflwT3DmlqbE6SL01o-mPKzacTBjFkHNLyuMlPV4ob__xeKFFvTDX0eJemXhmuATAEgp84LQLokDwCeokN5MYI-3ObCwxKD7yA4_zBB0PZINrTeGmqiLrhghiIMG4BBs1LrNEkM0/s1600/goodbye+20160018.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="Man we miss you Carina!!! (at the airport, waaaaah!)" border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjxKFBZflwT3DmlqbE6SL01o-mPKzacTBjFkHNLyuMlPV4ob__xeKFFvTDX0eJemXhmuATAEgp84LQLokDwCeokN5MYI-3ObCwxKD7yA4_zBB0PZINrTeGmqiLrhghiIMG4BBs1LrNEkM0/s1600/goodbye+20160018.JPG" title="Man we miss you Carina!!! (at the airport, waaaaah!)" /></a></div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiQTF3WHL0LmGni0fhOGDeiVNMjewhLyNxvcuJA-32DtVF-DVv7ahZq9S0JKhlPRXYwLB7RHtcZ5rjlon0T3y6bRe0GW7OvXH54x_D0jr1d-MWZhuNXc_8zB8IyuasgCFe-0_rbaZzetVk/s1600/IMG_7777.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="Carina brought Dave home to us xx" border="0" height="200" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiQTF3WHL0LmGni0fhOGDeiVNMjewhLyNxvcuJA-32DtVF-DVv7ahZq9S0JKhlPRXYwLB7RHtcZ5rjlon0T3y6bRe0GW7OvXH54x_D0jr1d-MWZhuNXc_8zB8IyuasgCFe-0_rbaZzetVk/s200/IMG_7777.JPG" title="Carina brought Dave home to us xx" width="200" /></a></div>
We got the chance to host my Swiss friend's daughter for seven weeks while she was here in New Zealand, and it was the best thing we did this year (along with <a href="http://www.greatfun4kidsblog.com/2016/11/what-kids-learn-from-having-dog.html" target="_blank">getting Clyde, our rescue puppy</a>). Carina became part of our family, like a big sister to the kids, and an amazing support for me. She brought Dave the female cat home (and pampered her silly) after she'd gone AWOL when we got Clyde.<br />
She played games with us, helped with dishes and cooked the meanest pancakes.<br />
Boy oh boy we miss her. But what it showed me was that we love having someone else in our home - it somehow fills the gap and makes everything more fun. (So we're getting a French homestay in 2017, though we don't know if anyone could be as amazing as our Carina!)<br />
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<h2>
Bumping into my old youth group boys, randomly</h2>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhfhhEyBAPJuTjRXWHKFFlbSzYTgwVV9ShGCMfPpe2v5MXRM2QFdSBJdBlKm009OJM_6s4An9JyPGWVQ2G6p9gX4DQl5TfbUaD46yubyLPe8qumKm8KTVchYHU3zyTvHbsuCmFbZi982kg/s1600/lee+boys.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="178" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhfhhEyBAPJuTjRXWHKFFlbSzYTgwVV9ShGCMfPpe2v5MXRM2QFdSBJdBlKm009OJM_6s4An9JyPGWVQ2G6p9gX4DQl5TfbUaD46yubyLPe8qumKm8KTVchYHU3zyTvHbsuCmFbZi982kg/s200/lee+boys.JPG" width="200" /></a></div>
I snapped this random picture at the Motat Christmas lights, not realising that the bunch of people walking past were two of my old youth group boys, and their kids... What a reunion we had! Wow. I was proud to be able to introduce them to my kids. I used to sit up nights praying for those boys, and to hear them tell my children, "Your mum, she had unconditional love" was just, wow. It was what I needed to hear - that I made a difference to somebody all those years ago. (They also still recognised me and said I haven't changed, bless!)<br />
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Having Olivier (an orphan from Rwanda) share our Christmas</h2>
It was kind of amazing, how we managed to enjoy this Christmas, in spite of everything... We even had quite a lovely pile of gifts under the tree. How is this possible? This Christmas has been full of little miracles, provision, kindness and blessings. Even the usually longed for - but this year <i>dreaded</i> - Christmas Eve was ok. Mainly because we invited a friend of Dash's from school to share Christmas with us. <a href="https://givealittle.co.nz/cause/olivierniyitegeka" target="_blank">Olivier</a> is a sixteen-year-old orphan from Rwanda, and his host family in New Zealand were returning to Samoa for Christmas, leaving him alone. We couldn't have that, now could we? Funny how when you open up your heart and your home, good things happen. Taking the focus off ourselves and sharing Christmas with someone who has never had a family Christmas before (!!!!!) saved our Christmas. We watched the Nativity Story movie together after hanging our stockings and drinking hot chocolate. Every Christmas that movie reminds me what Christmas is about: <a href="https://www.facebook.com/hashtag/makingroom?source=feed_text&story_id=10154953573786495">#makingroom</a> <a href="https://www.facebook.com/hashtag/giving?source=feed_text&story_id=10154953573786495">#giving</a> <a href="https://www.facebook.com/hashtag/love?source=feed_text&story_id=10154953573786495">#love</a> <a href="https://www.facebook.com/hashtag/selflessness?source=feed_text&story_id=10154953573786495">#selflessness</a> <a href="https://www.facebook.com/hashtag/oursaviourisborn?source=feed_text&story_id=10154953573786495">#oursaviourisborn</a></div>
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We enjoyed a traditional early start to Christmas morning (6am - yep Olivier, this is how we do it!) with plenty of gifts (yep you too, Olivier!) Of course we wouldn't invite someone for Christmas without making sure they had prezzies to open too - we'd had a garage sale a few weeks earlier to fund gifts for Olivier and for the kids from each other. We had a lovely Christmas lunch with my family at my sister's house, and I even got a nap. All in all, surprisingly enjoyable - and Olivier declared it to be "miraculous".</div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjQ9YK_8hqK2Ki3hUcUbsqSdOQ9jlnsKrrJ8NYRlqTxkXb90q_9Y-uglLtkRJuaFieJqNv1XxTi9WMyVZax9_eB6iax7ujqT2L4oXsq_ldkF1QZCzH-FKK1lcakEWgIYe5ZcvwarJwfuH4/s1600/christmas20160016.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="Christmas with Olivier" border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjQ9YK_8hqK2Ki3hUcUbsqSdOQ9jlnsKrrJ8NYRlqTxkXb90q_9Y-uglLtkRJuaFieJqNv1XxTi9WMyVZax9_eB6iax7ujqT2L4oXsq_ldkF1QZCzH-FKK1lcakEWgIYe5ZcvwarJwfuH4/s1600/christmas20160016.jpg" title="Christmas with Olivier" /></a></div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiRXb74VdMyA30BF3OMdxvzOsUxQno_bgImfvaVtEI9Iz8Q7RN_8r29Nm9pVIXLm2-0H_3PA2lYLTM67O5mkrnW5rqgZVqZNnchCQh1Wugjk1A8K0r6wEZ30rA0LyoyVEAl_M1kmJ1nPXY/s1600/christmas20160009.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="Hot chocolate, the real kind" border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiRXb74VdMyA30BF3OMdxvzOsUxQno_bgImfvaVtEI9Iz8Q7RN_8r29Nm9pVIXLm2-0H_3PA2lYLTM67O5mkrnW5rqgZVqZNnchCQh1Wugjk1A8K0r6wEZ30rA0LyoyVEAl_M1kmJ1nPXY/s1600/christmas20160009.jpg" title="Hot chocolate, the real kind" /></a></div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhHgr4SDNEpD5ELc8H8wyGMdGCMUo9Kg_qsMkkgD21vd93CnJ6ScIoEHbcU_JxW4NIO6kEww-Lt_lZB-1ZQT0rqGilaY0XeA26TO_SCxug_f72aO7jW6yMR8sWDW7FOFx_bkiSDqCS5BXg/s1600/christmas20160014.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="stockings hung, candles lit" border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhHgr4SDNEpD5ELc8H8wyGMdGCMUo9Kg_qsMkkgD21vd93CnJ6ScIoEHbcU_JxW4NIO6kEww-Lt_lZB-1ZQT0rqGilaY0XeA26TO_SCxug_f72aO7jW6yMR8sWDW7FOFx_bkiSDqCS5BXg/s1600/christmas20160014.jpg" title="stockings hung, candles lit" /></a></div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh3UZj5reBTWqTvDAT72VcrjOYk9NQ4rTFnXSoZ0FLYPqdFeQczzPlb05ApOUEEsFFf9MVIhErE5oEhbFmGA8zGLjILfnaPAGd47R_KcRmwTwEkmnVQO5RMReXD9bD4VlRqzsJL43wgUxA/s1600/christmas20160017.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="A pile of prezzies under the tree - makes a mama feel so grateful" border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh3UZj5reBTWqTvDAT72VcrjOYk9NQ4rTFnXSoZ0FLYPqdFeQczzPlb05ApOUEEsFFf9MVIhErE5oEhbFmGA8zGLjILfnaPAGd47R_KcRmwTwEkmnVQO5RMReXD9bD4VlRqzsJL43wgUxA/s1600/christmas20160017.jpg" title="A pile of prezzies under the tree - makes a mama feel so grateful" /></a></div>
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This was our first Christmas that I had to pull off on my own, and boy, things got tight there for a while. We found ourselves the recipients of a charitable food box and Christmas ham for the first time ever - which was strangely disorienting, as in the past we've been on the side of <i>creating</i> Christmas food parcels for needy families, not receiving them.</div>
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One thing it made me realise is just how much it means to sole parents to be remembered at Christmas - to be <i>thought of,</i> when you're on your own. When friends turned up unexpectedly with a gift for *me* to put under the tree, it meant the world. To have something to open on Christmas morning, myself, when all my focus had been about making sure the kids had gifts and a good Christmas - well, I can tell you I will never forget that feeling. Of being remembered, and thought of. #soflippingrateful</div>
<h2>
Rainbows End, just us, thanks to my mum and dad</h2>
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My parents gave us tickets to Rainbows End and we finished off the year having a fun day out together, just the four of us. Scrag finally got to fulfill his wish and drive the Scorpion karts, as he just squeaked past 150cm tall (he was too little last time we went, and it was his goal to be tall enough to ride next time we came. He's only eight, such a tall lad!)</div>
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He was also tall enough to go on the more extreme rides like the "stratosfear" (one of those awful spinny-flip-you-upside-down rides that you couldn't pay me to go on).</div>
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Miss fab is an adrenaline junkie since ages ago and it was her delight to mentor her little bro into the ways of the anti-gravity force. Ugh. But he loved it.</div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgRdbE9s0vHYuMl3HnaBAvlu0te4n8oF5HupbAZr3inWADqxr8R7kU-Qfl2XVO3ndNfeJAC_JkrNWgU_OBV4bJ8R2ZlyaU7M160-8pP5RAfIAo9TjvhNXjuJ6z5-_TolgwhutJw8ITQer8/s1600/christmas20160008.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="Just look at his face - he's just passed the height check and is about to DRIVE" border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgRdbE9s0vHYuMl3HnaBAvlu0te4n8oF5HupbAZr3inWADqxr8R7kU-Qfl2XVO3ndNfeJAC_JkrNWgU_OBV4bJ8R2ZlyaU7M160-8pP5RAfIAo9TjvhNXjuJ6z5-_TolgwhutJw8ITQer8/s1600/christmas20160008.jpg" title="Just look at his face - he's just passed the height check and is about to DRIVE" /></a></div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhLjDhH32EeJg9086c4xsu1j7HrKM86h6UN_1igfgi5fxIf-1AObFUXy0MGFjV6vyRunNLeZhOd8gAm53ogzk8lLZlj3R5rBbkZgZrTMhT6FnjnaiPrxUbhApPaF3mRpxmS6CZoWee-K_8/s1600/christmas20160007.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="Coming into the pits - scorpion karts = nailed" border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhLjDhH32EeJg9086c4xsu1j7HrKM86h6UN_1igfgi5fxIf-1AObFUXy0MGFjV6vyRunNLeZhOd8gAm53ogzk8lLZlj3R5rBbkZgZrTMhT6FnjnaiPrxUbhApPaF3mRpxmS6CZoWee-K_8/s1600/christmas20160007.jpg" title="Coming into the pits - scorpion karts = nailed" /></a></div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhXV9y4s4tfbWIPYhNbqpsB5LH7BLwewpgA_AkqHSbLwrdtdyeFROVJw0Ztw9rSNqipS1ampt1rQsL1KHq26SDXgECX8eiH5eVHwB3rqkOeYm9EnLPvxNtzVVFgSpfNuLKmBXVH4IQOR8s/s1600/christmas20160010.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="TALL ENOUGH!!! (just)" border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhXV9y4s4tfbWIPYhNbqpsB5LH7BLwewpgA_AkqHSbLwrdtdyeFROVJw0Ztw9rSNqipS1ampt1rQsL1KHq26SDXgECX8eiH5eVHwB3rqkOeYm9EnLPvxNtzVVFgSpfNuLKmBXVH4IQOR8s/s1600/christmas20160010.jpg" title="TALL ENOUGH!!! (just)" /></a></div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj7Zuoo9WBq6Ri_vsydR0eVY9u13LiDrET3yc36lzvIcw-yzWh7xUK2JJez7B4Hn7fZBW9d6x2aew3yEkm_nS5mXVrn5u2YKsDGHcPdXLxxEgRT3acyH2fEZ2wYhcFRUnyHnDk_uQa-eNQ/s1600/christmas20160005.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="Crazy weirdos who like these hideous rides - nutters one and all!" border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj7Zuoo9WBq6Ri_vsydR0eVY9u13LiDrET3yc36lzvIcw-yzWh7xUK2JJez7B4Hn7fZBW9d6x2aew3yEkm_nS5mXVrn5u2YKsDGHcPdXLxxEgRT3acyH2fEZ2wYhcFRUnyHnDk_uQa-eNQ/s1600/christmas20160005.jpg" title="Crazy weirdos who like these hideous rides - nutters one and all!" /></a></div>
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<span style="font-size: large;">And so that's a wrap from us. </span></div>
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<span style="font-size: large;">2016, you sucked but you didn't kill me. Thanks for that.</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span></div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjUtp3epaHSrACNW-_MT0UZ-8vSut9rse5D-xk6ksXRAoXxffM1Hpt9ISWbUSGM5z9yCHJDB1rCcAi4_shqjbmPp976k6-M-S9hUj_Lf9YZAJ_VpArV-KtTG3qRU0iQ6Hs1cqJGDVrlAIs/s1600/goodbye+2016+collage.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjUtp3epaHSrACNW-_MT0UZ-8vSut9rse5D-xk6ksXRAoXxffM1Hpt9ISWbUSGM5z9yCHJDB1rCcAi4_shqjbmPp976k6-M-S9hUj_Lf9YZAJ_VpArV-KtTG3qRU0iQ6Hs1cqJGDVrlAIs/s1600/goodbye+2016+collage.jpg" /></a></div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgpfCnBHZ0B80Kb0vevNtMOhn6JpGykwmLnMwwUm1NeBptnvuk6WkyZ1qGLI60LAEiJmp5iS6sVzhrlbVcM72kx3ppitGgP0OfF_CjCbOjXyxZp1_Skm5072UTyh0nET_X3g9nxCpWCW2g/s1600/christmas20160006.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="Me and mine" border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgpfCnBHZ0B80Kb0vevNtMOhn6JpGykwmLnMwwUm1NeBptnvuk6WkyZ1qGLI60LAEiJmp5iS6sVzhrlbVcM72kx3ppitGgP0OfF_CjCbOjXyxZp1_Skm5072UTyh0nET_X3g9nxCpWCW2g/s1600/christmas20160006.jpg" title="Me and mine" /></a></div>
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<h2>
HAPPY NEW YEAR</h2>
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<span style="font-size: large;">(and 2017 can ya go a bit easier on all of us pleeeeease???!)</span></div>
Simoneyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09554122579485306611noreply@blogger.com0