Epilogue: We All Survived

 

Hello, dear reader. Here I am popping back up to write one final blog post, more than three years after my last entry. I kept thinking that inspiration would strike and I'd keep writing here sporadically about things that inspired or moved me, but I didn't.

And now here I am, one week away from having an empty nest.

Yes, that's right - by this time next week, the last of my babies will be out in the world, standing on their own two feet, living their lives and pursuing their dreams. The youngest is heading to Wellington to study. My girl went flatting last year, and my eldest left home ages ago. So this is it - I'm closing the book on my parenting journey. I'll always be a mum, and have my door open and food or beds or help ready whenever it's needed, but my day-to-day job as a hands-on parent is done. 

So I thought you deserved an epilogue. 

Not just so I can boast a bit as a proud mum, but also because it got pretty gnarly there for a while, so I wanted to leave you with some hope that if we can survive, anyone can. 

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An Action Packed Sports Party - with Bubble Soccer

Scrag turned NINE last month - the boy who was a baby when when this blog began is now an energetic, sports-loving rugby player whose hero is Usain Bolt and who can kick goals and dunk baskets with the best of them.

So of course his birthday party had to involve Sports. Action. Running. Competition. BALLS.
The birthday boy helped me plan every detail, from the food to the guest list to the games - there would be very little sitting around for guests at this party!

With me being not exactly the sportiest of mothers (ahem), I was a bit nervous about running the show (I don't even know the offside rule yet) - until I came across the Bumper Ball website, and asked them to help make this party epic by bringing their crazy bubble action to our gig. The birthday boy was delighted when they said yes to partnering with me for this party (and so was I ). Meanwhile, the invited guests were counting down sleeps.

Here's how the party went....

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Baby Turns Eight (and Mum Ponders his Struggles)

Today I'm writing a post about my youngest child - the ray of sunshine affectionately known as Scrag.
He turned eight this week. EIGHT. My baby.
Scrag was born happy. He was a delight and a joy, the pet of the family and everybody's snuggle bug from his earliest days.
I remember being in the hospital, wracked with post-surgery pain (like nothing I've ever experienced before; so bad I wanted to die. The morphine did nothing.) My newborn baby was lying there gazing into my eyes, and he knew me. As we locked eyes, me in pain, him serene, I said to myself: it's worth it. This pain is worth it to have this child.

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Kids' Sport the Way it Should Be

We've all seen those stories on the news: over-competitive parents overstepping the sideline and attacking the Ref, the opposition, each other.
These days there are signs up all over the place on Saturday mornings reminding us all that: "This is not a World Cup match, this is a kids' game of soccer/rugby/netball".
Some of us get a bit excited and forget that fact, apparently.

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Three Kids, Three Codes (makes for a busy day)

Three kids, three codes. I thought that was a snappy title for the craziness that is Saturday Winter Sport.
There are three kids playing three sports, all on the same morning. And two parents.
We didn't plan ahead, obviously.
How can you be in three places at once, watching three gripping sports fixtures in one morning when there's only two of you?
Very carefully, that's how.

With lots of overlapping, and driving and txting.
You leave home at 8.45am and you stagger in the door and zip off your (totally inappropriate) boots at 3.30pm.
You go through half a tank of gas. You cheer yourself hoarse.
And you enjoy every minute of it.

Welcome to Saturdays, with three sport-mad kids, playing three codes.

Scrag Plays Rugby
This is Scrag's first year giving rugby a go. It's the "rippa" version (non-tackle), and it's all about speed. Oh my goodness but I enjoyed watching this! Our tall lad is such a natural. the other parents on the sideline couldn't believe Scrag had never played before.
"Yep," I confirmed, "This is is first ever game..."
He scored three tries and came away with the Man of the Match award.
A mum from the opposing team said, "You might be mum to a future All Black!" (Haha - every Kiwi parent's dream?) We have been a soccer family since forever, so this is our first time being a rugby family. And we love it. Scrag loves it. And he's taken to it like a duck to water.

MATCH STATS: Scrag is playing for Eden Rugby Gold in the Under-7s Rippa grade, They played against another team from the same club so had to turn their shirts inside out to avoid confusion. The score was 8-7 to the other team, but a hard-fought match with three tries by Scrag. Woop!

LOGISTICS:  At 8.45am I take Scrag to his game, which kicks off at 9.15am. Mr G meets us there with Dash. He watches the first half then takes Dash to his training across town for 10am. When Scrag's game is over we get smoothies and head to Seddon Fields to watch the next match: Dash playing soccer. (Miss fab tags along with me; her game is not til later).

Dash Plays Soccer
Er, or should I say FOOTBALL? (the proper name for soccer).
Dash has played football since he was four years old, and he has always been a stand-out. This year circumstances forced us to try out for a new club, so  with a new team, a new coach and now playing on a full sized pitch, things are pretty exciting on the football front too.
Dash has always dreamed of being a professional footballer. He's pretty gosh darned good too, so you never know....

MATCH STATS: Dash plays 13th grade football for Western Springs Vespers (the club's second team). First game of the season, they played against a team from Manurewa, the score was 8-0 to us, including a great goal by Dash. Dash plays mostly in the midfield.

LOGISTICS: The game kicked off at 11am and I really should have planned ahead and got a ride for Miss fab to her pre-game training so I could watch all of Dash's game, but no. Instead I got to see the first half, then scurried off to brave the madness of Lincoln Rd traffic to get Miss Fab to her training on time. We were fifteen minutes late and it took me 25 minutes to find a carpark...

Miss Fab Plays Netball
Last year we had to give Netball a miss because the match day was Wednesday which clashed with Miss Fab's true passion, Cheerleading. This year my friend Justine took it upon herself to start a team playing in the Saturday league, so our two cheerleading girls could play netball as well. Justine is THE BEST coach ever. Gosh but she pulls awesomeness out of the girls in her team! The best kind of coach - encouraging, tough, firm and passionate about the game. We are super lucky to have her, and Miss Fab is loving being able to play netball again.

MATCH STATS: Our new team is called the Boston Bolts (and we have snazzy new uniforms and personalised hoodies sourced by the amazing Justine). Our first grading game happened to be against THE top team from THE top league, who won the whole thing in the highest grade last year, apparently. They were tough. But we took the game to them and made them work for their win. the score was 19-10 to them, which doesn't reflect how awesomely our girls played. Super proud netball mums all round.

LOGISTICS: After dropping Miss fab off at her training 15 minutes late at the madness that is (Ti Pai Netball courts) I drove around for 25 minutes before I found a carpark. The game started at 12.45 and we were done by 2pm, but decided to go shopping for winter clothes afterwards(what was I thinking?). So yeah.

At 3.30pm I limped in the front door, dropped the shopping bags on the floor and unzipped my boots. Six hours of standing and walking in wedge boots = not a great move. Next time I'll know better.
Cos next Saturday we'll do it all again (and we can't wait).


P.S. This post is for you Grandma, Aunty Irene, Uncle Allan, Nan and Grandad.

A Glimpse of the Future?

For posterity, I'm writing this story down, so one day we can all say, "We knew it! We knew that boy would go far!"

This is a Scrag story, a wee glimpse into his future and the man he might become.
Bear with me while I paint the picture...


"SCRAG THE SAVER"
Scrag is the youngest, and has only recently started getting pocket money, which we noticed him saving diligently and counting regularly.
When before our aunty and uncle from England returned home last month, they gave each of the kids $50, which Scrag raced to add to his growing stash.

He now had $80 saved - a lot of money for a six year old. We went shopping for a toy he really wanted, but he only spent $30, saying "I'm saving the rest."
(All this so you know that Scrag is a diligent saver who is careful with his money.)

[Scrag with Grandad on father's Day last year]

"SCRAG THE MATHS GENIUS"
Scrag is amazing at maths. He is two maths stages ahead of where he needs to be, so although he has to work super hard at reading and writing (which leads me to suspect he may have my dyslexia) he is amazingly bright, intuitive, canny and insightful as well as "a maths genius". The questions he asks and the things he intuits are really beyond what is usual for his age, and numbers just seem to make sense to him in a way that is a complete mystery to me!

SCRAG'S PREDICTION
The other day we were driving somewhere and out of the blue Scrag announced:

"When I grow up I'm not going to have a job working for someone else. I'm going to make my own job and be my own boss."

Wow. What six year old says things like that??? The thing is, when he said it his words had a ring of truth to them.
Scrag, I reckon you just made a true prediction. With your maths genius and canny brain, I can totally see you being an amazingly successful businessman, with your own company, being your own boss.

[Playing cards at Lake Taupo with our Aunty Irene from England - using the Hobbiton playing cards]

SCRAG'S GENEROUS HEART
Now comes the bit that melts my mother-heart.
Last night my parents were over for our Thursday Night Grandparents Dinner (woop) and they told me the story of a conversation they had with Scrag.

They were playing cards using our Hobbiton card pack, and my mum said something about how she wanted to go to see Hobbiton but it is so expensive so she's been saving her pennies, and her birthday money but her birthday money got all used up paying to get things fixed on the car, doctors etc so now it's all gone and she didn't get to buy anything for her birthday.

Scrag says to her, "Nan, wait here. I've got a birthday present for you."
He runs out of the room and comes back a moment later with his hands behind his back.
"Close your eyes, Nan, and hold out your hands..." he says. "Now open them!"
My mum opens her eyes, and there is Scrag's treasured $50 note, lying in her hands.

Just like that, he had run and gotten the money he had diligently saved and gave it away without a second thought.

(Mum went on to tell how after she gave him back his $50 and insisted he keep it, he said, "OK well I have another present for you. Close your eyes again..."
Then she felt his warm little arms thrown around her middle, with a "Love you Nan, Happy Birthday! And one for Grandad too!")

[We are loving our Thursday Dinners  with Nan and Grandad. NOTE TO SELF: Take more photos!]

So there we go.
A glimpse into my youngest son's generous heart, and I think a glimpse into his future.
I believe he will be a man who is good with money, but who gives generously of his resources.
A businessman philanthropist. That's my prediction. And now I've written it down.
Let's see if I'm right.

A Star Wars Party *Just Because*

I must be mad, I know, let's just admit it right now. These "parties for no reason" are getting out of hand, with TWO these last school holidays.

I was kind of hoping Scrag would forget my mumbled agreement to have a Star Wars "party" for him and a few Jedi pals, but on the last Wednesday of the hols, he came up to me as I sat at the computer pinning things and asked so sweetly: "Mum, shouldn't we be getting ready for the Star Wars party already? Shall I get my notebook so we can start making plans?"

In my defence, I am rather powerless against the heartfelt pleas of my young Jedi when he asks so nicely (and hugs me so much). The Force is strong with this one. What could I do but start searching for Star Wars ideas?

The first thing I found were these cool Styrofoam R2D2 cups. So I pinned them. Downloaded the free printable and printed off two sheets. Scrag and I made the cups together, improvising the lids (since we couldn't find any cups with lids in the shops)...

1. Trim and stick the R2D2 body onto the styrofoam cup using a glue stick. Trace circles on the back of silver card to form a lid. Carefully cut out the circles.
2. Cut a small cross with a craft knife in the middle of the circle to poke the straw through. Cut out the round lid printable. 
3. Use a hole punch to punch a hole in the centre circle of the lid printable (or carefully cut a small circle). Staple the lid printable to the silver circle, letting the staples line up with the edges of the blue printed shapes.
4. Poke a straw through and Voila! An R2D2 cup perfect for your impromptu Star Wars Party!

Download the free R2D2 Cup printable

 I've made these Light Saber Napkin Holders before (and had been collecting toilet rolls for weeks). They are easy to make, by covering cardboard toilet rolls with silver duct tape and adding black electrical tape details. (Or you can paint the toilet rolls black and add the duct tape as detail).

We have been mad keen Star Wars enthusiasts since forever. We've had a Star Wars Birthday Party (for Dash), a Star Wars Theme dinner and a May The Fourth (be with you) Star Wars night for a bunch of eight and nine year olds.
In our dressup box lurks a Darth Vader talking helmet and a Princess Leia wig, so pulling off a Star Wars party with two days notice was really a doddle, especially with the most enthusiastic six-year old Jedi helper EVER.

We made enough light saber handles from toilet rolls to make balloon light sabers as well. Such a pity that the $2 shop balloon pump broke after we just blew up these two balloons. I guess you get what you pay for aye? (You can bet we protected these two beauties from all comers until it was time to do battle).

I was a bit bummed but my young padawan told me, "Mum don't be worried because look at all the OTHER amazing things you've made! Fear leads to anger. Anger leads to hate. Hate is the path to the dark side..." Someone's been listening to Yoda.

I found a roll of leftover black building paper in the garage, which I stapled to the back wall under the carport, and Scrag and I drew a chalk galaxy...

This is such a simple idea, cost NOTHING and was so effective. Building paper, staples, chalk. Easy!

Of course our trusty lemonade stand was put to use again, and this time our drink dispenser was filled with delicious sugar-free Yoda Soda...

Sugar Free Yoda Soda Recipe (Apple & Green Tea punch)

PUNCH BASE:
1 litre of boiling water
4 green tea bags
2-3 tablespoons of liquid honey
Juice and zest of one lemon
One green apple, grated

Leave to steep and chill overnight. In the morning, strain the liquid into your drink dispenser or punch bowl and add:

• one litre of clear apple juice
• two litres of sparkling soda water
• 2-3 drops of green food colouring

Our young Jedi trainees guzzled this down like they didn't know it was good for them. Yummy!

Last week of the school holidays, not many of his buddies were in town, so just three young Jedi were due to turn up to play. Really, this was a themed afternoon tea, with light saber battles thrown in. But Scrag loved it and appreciated all the little touches (he kept hugging me and saying, "Thankyou mummy, I love you" "Mummy you're the best mum ever!" It made it all worth it).

I set up a beam for them to have light saber battled on, a plank of wood supported by two sawhorses. Underneath was a homemade fall-mat. A tarp, spread with flat cushions/squabs, with our large woven mat spread on top. Nobody seemed to mind falling.

Of course if this were a "real party" I would have planned all kinds of fun star wars games and activities. But this was a glorified group playdate on a theme with a special afternoon tea, so I left them to come up with their own fun.

The Darth Vader helmet was a hit. Darth even came for afternoon tea...

For a bit of easy (healthy) food theming, I put cheese, salami, celery and carrot sticks on toothpicks and wrapped their bottoms with a strip of tin foil. I labelled the tomato sauce "lava", put popcorn in silver boxes and called it "asteroids" and for the piece de resistance, Scrag and I made some Star Wars cookies. I found some cookie cutters online and used our favourite basic cookie recipe...

The cookie cutters come in a pack of four, C3PO, Yoda, Chewbacca and Darth Vader. I found mine on TradeMe, but you can find them all over the internet and they are cheap as chips ($6.95 for the set).
We divided the dough into quarters and added colour for each shape.

1. C3PO: Just cut out the dough, as is. No colouring required.
2. Yoda: Add a splash of green food colouring to Yoda's quarter of the dough.
3. Chewbacca: Add 2 tablespoons of cocoa powder to Chewie's dough to make him nice and brown.
4. Darth Vader: Add cocoa powder PLUS black food colouring to make Darth dark, as he should be.

While not as much fun FOR ME as the fairy party (cos all the mums dropped their boys and fled the scene) Scrag loved it and I was super-glad I pulled it off for him. Plus it means that now he's not asking for a Star Wars Party for his next birthday any more (we've already DONE that one), now he wants a couple of friends to go to Rainbows End....

Oh dear. Are we coming to the end of our birthday party years? NOOOooooo!!! See why I have to squeeze in these parties for no reason while I can?

Other Star Wars Fun...

• Star Wars Birthday Party (with me as Princess Leia)
• Star Wars Theme Night
• How to Make an EASY Darth Vader Pinata
• How to Make Wookie Cookies & Lightsaber Napkin Holders

Baby No More

He's just turned six and he won't let us call him "bubba" any more.

He has been on the sidelines at soccer games since he was in-vitro and his first outing on a soccer field the other week, he showed us just how much he's absorbed all these years watching his brother. His skills were surprising, his goals were amazing. He got Player of the Day, first up, and glowed with pride.

He's tall. He's strong. He's fast.

Yesterday he came second in the school cross country - which made his birthday extra special, especially after what happened last year. He's been  waiting a whole year to prove to himself he could do it, and he DID.

Scrag has been blogged about almost all his life; he's used to having every moment recorded for posterity.

Sometimes when I look at him, this tall strong boy, I think my heart will burst. Truly.

 He's just a super awesome kid.

I'm proud to have this lad, this lovely boy as my son.

Yesterday I said to him, If six years ago somebody had offered me a choice between a million bucks and a baby called Scrag, do you know what I would choose?

He said, The million bucks of course.
I said, No way. Even if they offered me a Billion I'd still pick YOU. That's just money. But you're a TREASURE.

And it's true, he is.
So happy birthday darling Scrag.
You're growing up so fast. You're a baby no more.

And I am proud of the person that you are becoming.
All my love forever

Mummy
xx