19 June 2010


As I survey my cushiony butt, I wonder to myself what it would have been like to have lived back in the Renaissance days?

Oh they liked their curvy girls back then.
Look at those mounded bellies! Cheesecake thighs everywhere!!
I would have fit right in.

There would have been no moaning and groaning over the scales. No squeezing into muffin-top jeans. I would have been armed with corsets and long voluminous skirts. Famous painters would have asked me to pose for them, because my hippy figure would have been perfect for their next great masterpiece (of course I would have politely declined, because cavorting in the altogether is not my idea of a fun time, especially in those chilly uninsulated Renaissance mansions).

Remember studying those ancient artifacts at school for social studies? (fertility symbols of ancient cultures...?) Not a skinny chick among them. All boobs and butts, they were. Big round bellies. Curvy is Good has been the motto for thousands of years.

When did skinny become the be-all-and-end-all of beauty?
Pretty recently, I'm thinking.
Who decided that gaunt and stick-like is desirable?

Who says that curvy girls should spend our lives trying to get rid of our roundness, denying ourselves the pleasure of eating delicious food, wasting time counting calories, boring our men with constant talk of diets and weight loss, making ourselves miserable by obsessing over one of the most natural parts of life: eating (and passing on our dangerous obsessions to our daughters who watch our every move).

Why should we curvy girls sit on the sidelines and watch our children splash in the water without us, because we're too embarrassed of our thighs to brave a swimsuit and the stares of others?

So what if our butts look a mile wide on a bicycle seat! Who's really looking anyway?? Why shouldn't we just get over our self-consciousness and ride, feel the wind in our faces, join in the fun of free wheeling with our kids...

It's Henri over at Marketing to Milk who got me thinking on this one. In her post she talked about an old woman she met who is in her eighties and still obsessing about her weight. At eighty! That really got me thinking.

Am I going to waste time and energy being unhappy with what I've got to work with, or am I going to be realistic about the body I'm left with after three jumbo babies have grown out of me?

Am I going to spend the next 40 years foolishly trying to hold on to my youth, or am I going to grow old gracefully?

What is beautiful anyway? We can't trust our culture to tell us. The fashion changes so often - Marilyn Monroe was the height of sexy in the 50's. These days she would have been told: "Sorry you're overweight, come back when you more closely resemble a stick."

So forget the media. Forget the magazines, the Filmstars, and pleasing Tyra.

What is beauty that will last?

Know any older women who radiate joy? I do. Sure they have wrinkles and you might not see them on any magazine covers, but oh they sparkle.

What lines they have are carved on their faces by laughter and smiles. They know how to have fun and enjoy life. Plenty of tears have run down those cheeks, but coldness and hardness hasn't penetrated their souls. Their hearts radiate love, peace, acceptance and wisdom, not bitterness and regret. When you finish speaking with women like these, you come away feeling... blessed.

These are the truly beautiful women. This is true beauty. It's soul-deep. It's beauty that can be hugged, it draws you in. You find it hard to tear your eyes away.
This beauty doesn't fear growing old - because like fine wine, age only increases its value, and its depth.

Girls, let's celebrate, emulate and cultivate that kind of beauty.
To heck with our cellulite and wrinkles!
Live, love, laugh, dance and swim if you want to!!
It's our joy that keeps us young on the inside, no matter what the mirror says.

PS: These women pictured above are two of my role models, Helen Monk and Jill Smith, Pastors, Counselors, mothers, grandmothers and women par-excellence. I love their beauty and their style; they have a radiance and warmth that is fascinating. I love these beautiful ladies.
Who are your role models??

Photos from GoogleImages

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Shell said...

I love this. You are so right. There's no reason to let a little extra cushion stop us from being out there, living our lives and having fun. Going to wear my bathing suit proudly!

Kathleen said...

I love it too!! So true - society's thing with skinny women is a fairly recent invention. I'd quite fancy a bathing suit like Marilyn's one!! Lovely blog, I'm about to sit down with a cup of tea & have a good read :)



PaisleyJade said...

Totally right - loved seeing an Oprah show a while ago about beauty around the world, and in one country (Mauritania) thin is ugly! http://www.oprah.com/style/Beauty-Around-the-World/16#slide

It's important to make healthy choices and look after this shell for God's glory - but people are becoming obsessed with themselves and it's getting a bit out of balance! This body is for enjoying life!!

BJ_Mama said...

right at this moment...YOU ARE MY ROLE MODEL! What a "beautiful" post! And, oh, so true! Funny thing, I totally call myself fat/ugly all the time becasue of my curves...but when I'm pregnant (like right now) I completely embrace the belly and curves. I think they are BEautiful! Now, if I could just get my head straight the rest of the time!
Thank you for reminding me!

Johnny said...

Go Simone that's right on the button! There's already enough to worry about without having to worry about having the perfect figure. This post speaks a lot to me, especially since my figure is light years from what I expected from myself even at the beginning of the year. Geez, I'm minus a boob! Didn't expect that one. Thanks so much for this. xx

Brigitte said...

Ahhhhh, like a breath of fresh air reading that!
I know what you mean about being around ladies like Helen and Jill, so inspiring and beautiful with a whole lot of JOY.
Right, I'm off to have a cup of tea WITH SUGAR and those chocolate biscuits that have been staring at me all morning. HOORAH! X

P.S. my email is brigitte.bokser@googlemail.com ;-)

Maureen said...

This is such a great powerful post! Totally love it. I've always been curvy and it runs in the family, there are still times when I wish I'm a few sizes smaller but I'm glad I'm healthy and now instead of focusing on how to loose weight I'm more into how long can I stay on this earth to watch my son LOL :D

Unknown said...

AMEN SISTER! I don't want to spend my time fretting over how I look in my bathing suit or my jeans! I want to live! Let's live!

Anonymous said...

Here bloody here. I am so totally with you (as u know). I decided yesterday to give up dieting. For good. I just hope i have the strength to continue once i know i've got to show myself on the beach ;>) If we lose the weight what will we be? Thinner but still the same in every other respect. It is an empty obsession. What will you say on your death bead? certainly not, oh i wish i had been thinner.


Anonymous said...

yep I gave up on diets. Now, I'm just trying to make sure I'm healthy. I'm in the process of trying to retrain muscles that work the wrong way. :)Great post!!

Piper Paradise said...

Great post. Lots to ponder!

Anonymous said...

I posted about your blog today. :)

Natasha in Oz said...

I wish all women everywhere would read this Simoney! This was an excellent post. I will make sure that Maddy reads it!

Well done :)

Best wishes always,
PS Big Al has had tonsillitis so he hasn't blogged for a few days but he will get back to you and Dash very soon!

Anonymous said...

ahhhh Simoney I am totally with you in asking the question...when did that emaciated look become fashion??? PLEASE FOR THE LOVE OF GOD EAT A BURGER!!!! AND THEN KEEP IT DOWN!!!!
It is all slightly disturbing.

Just finished a great book called Women Food and God...very interesting concept on how we eat reflects our belief in God
me and my hobbit body are never going to be emaciated
I focus on health and an active life style, and try not to get caught up in the lies
I too would have fit in quite nicely in the medieval times...mmmm....tooo bad things changed
great post you very smart lady!

Widge said...

I'm moving to Mauritania ;)

Maddy said...

I am very glad Mum told me about your post! It is so insightful! I agree with Mum - every female should read this post.

I hope your day is sweet,

PaisleyJade said...

Haha Widge! Apparently they like women with cellulite, thick ankles and divorced women are especially appealing!

Holly Lefevre said...

Absolutely brilliant! I admit it, I have been known to obsess, but I am working so very hard on accepting myself. I need to lose some weight (20 lbs.) for health reasons, but even when I was at my thinnest I was still a curvy girl. I do not let it stop my...I jump in the water with the kiddos (I wrote a post about that awhile back).

This entire mentality sucks! Marilyn Monroe was gorgeous...Kate Moss needs to eat..most of the actresses and models need to eat!!!

I see larger women with confidence and it radiates from them...of course I also larger women w/o confidence and that is sad. Confidence and self acceptance are beautiful!

I hope some of that made sense...I am so tired.

Lourie said...

Amen sister!!! We are on the same wave length because I posted something similar on one of my blogs (I have three cause I don't have enough to do--HA) Anyway....you are spot on!!

Unknown said...

Just came by to say "THANKS" for visitng my on my SITS day!

I LOVE this post and am so glad I got to read it. I am 'healthy' as we say in the south, and think it is so sad that our society feels we are defined by the word 'skinny'.

Have a wonderful week and thank you for your inspiring post!

Rae Ann said...

I love the Goddess of Willendorf! We could totally hang! Blame the skinny thing on Twiggy in the '60's. Darn her! What your observations say to me is that our bodies were clearly meant to be soft and round. I try to love mine for what it can do instead of how it appears. Try. Some days are better than others!

Melinda said...

This is wonderful. So, so true. All that wasted energy about weight when what truly attracts others in our heart. One of my sweetest role models in my jr. high friend's mother. She had this way of making me feel so special at a time when I felt so crappy about myself. I saw her a few weeks ago and she still radiates that same kind of warmth and love. I still felt so special. I want other people to feel that way when they're in my presence.

So glad you're enjoying TMT!! I'm tweeting this! ;0)

Unknown said...

I love this!! Beauty is SOUL deep. What a refreshing way of looking at things--THANK YOU from a larger, hippier woman!!

Dalia - Gen X Mom said...

You are so right. How did we get here? Why did we get here? How can we change back? What defines beauty anyway. Really!

Chanel said...

This was a great post. I is amazing to see the transition that the definition of beauty has made over the years. Some countries still appreciate beauty in all shapes and size.

jacksta said...

love this!

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