27 January 2011

This is My Life

The other evening I was out driving, alone.
Dropping off a little friend who had a bad dream while on a sleepover.
Picking up some coins from the BP for the Tooth Fairy.
The streets were near-empty, streetlights picking out familiar spots on my route home.
The train track, the house that sells veges, the corner of my street...
And all of a sudden it hit me.
This is my life.
This is my life!

At home sleeping in their beds are three precious little people I grew inside me.
There's a house I love and we own it.
This is my life, my wonderful life.

I got a surge of emotion, almost the "first day of term" feeling.
You know?

As I stepped out of the car, the night-scents assailed me...
Fresh, damp, sweet, almost tropical.
I breathed them in.
This is my home, this is my life.

Sometimes I forget what I have, the wonder of it.
I get caught up in the nagging and the grumping, the mess and the cleaning.
Most days I get to the end without being thankful, without pausing to count my blessings.

But this is my life.
The life I wished for, prayed for, hoped for and dreamed of.
I go from one end of the day to the other, oblivious to what I have.

The other evening I remembered lonely nights.
I remembered tears and prayers, fears I would always be alone.
These days I long for alone-ness, peace.
But this is what I wanted.
Little people in my life, my very own babies.
And a tall strong man to love me.

Back on my lonely bed I was ignorant of nappies, tantrums, "marital discussions".
I had no knowledge of sibling squabbles, morning breath, puddles on the toilet floor.
The dream I wished for had a rosey glow.
The Prince I dreamed of never complained about the lack of clean undies.
The children in my dreams were newborn-sweet, cuddled in my arms.
They never complained about "nachos again" or made a fuss about broccoli.

This is my life.
This is my dream. And my reality.
Every now and then it's good to remember, and give thanks...
I am blessed.
Blessed with dirty socks and endless laundry piles.
Blessed with grubby faces and stinky shoes.
Blessed with arms wrapped around me, voices chiming, "My mama!" "No, my mama!"
Blessed with whispers, "I love you mummy!"
Blessed with notes, "You're one hot mummer!"
Blessed with morning breath, blanket tussles, neck rubs.

Thank you. Thank you that this is my Real Life.

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jacksta said...

Love this Simone :)

Anonymous said...

ahhhhhhhhhh friend!
I LOVE♥ this post...for so many reasons
it is true...
this is YOUR life
and it is good

love and light

meg said...

gorgeous x

Brigitte said...

A wonderful and moving post Simone X

Amy said...

Possibly on of my favourite posts of yours. So lovely. Just SO lovely and says it all. Miss you x

Anonymous said...

Isn't it strange that what drives us mad is what we love. Distance or an objective eye reveals the mystery that's life. Your post is wonderfully touching. What is the book about that you're writing?
J. Aday Kennedy
The Differently-Abled Writer & Speaker
Children's Author of Klutzy Kantor & Marta's Gargantuan Wings

Angela said...

I love these "high tide" moments! May you have many more!

Sophie said...

Love those moments. Gorgeous photos to go with it too Simoney! BTW did I every tell you Mr G reminds me of Gerard Butler? Just a little bit? Thierry can't see it but I can!

Jennifer @ JenniferDukesLee.com said...

I get this.

Oh, do I ever GET this!

You've put words to thoughts that have been ruminating all week long.

Beautiful, this. Right there in the midst of the laundry mountains ... BEAUTY!
Beautiful, YOUR LIFE.
Beautiful, YOU!

- Jennifer Dukes Lee
Contributing Editor @ The High Calling

banban said...

Awesome, love this post.

Tammy said...

Beautiful! I love your editing on your pics too...very cool!

Dee said...

there's something about driving alone at night huh? (maybe it's just because i almost never do it these days??)
i think similar things....followed immediately with that thought "it's too good to be true" and an impending sense of dread...
and then, "there is no fear in love" on heavy repeat :) :)

PaisleyJade said...

So beautiful Simone (and love the images too). I read this while in a rush this morning and didn't comment, then while sitting outside with the kids today I remembered it and it's so true! I think we all need to remember this once in a while. xoxo

DeXaNiX said...

Love love love this post! And so true. We don't take enough time to be thankful for what we have, which is probably what we always wanted

emma @ frog, goose and bear said...

Beautiful post Simoney - we all need to remember these things more often.

The South African Kiwis said...

Amen! Thanks for that, being reminded everywhere in Bloggyland that there is so much to be thankful for.

Catching the Magic said...

Lovely post. It's all about staying focused on the positive hey :) We are so very fortunate and blessed indeed.

Rebecca said...


The Dutch Girl said...

Isn't it wonderful how those feelings can just pop up out of nowhere? I cherish those moments. But to be able to translate them so eloquently, you are blessed in that aspect as well.

Beautifully written! Happy SITS Day, enjoy the comment love today.


Anonymous said...

Simply Perfect! All of it, from the morning breath to the I Love You's. So glad I stopped by!

An Imperfect Momma said...

Wow...this is beautifully written! And so true. I'm currently pregnant w my second child & going through some problems so I cant go out w my son. It gets very frustrating at times w a hyper 18 mos old but I wouldn't trade it for anything :)

Happy SITS Day! Glad to have met ya

Robin said...

This is beautiful.

It is sad that we all do that. We get so caught up trying to get from one thing to another that we miss living and noticing our lives. Thanks for the reminder.

OneMommy said...

So poetic! I love the old-time looking photos with it, and how you wait until the first one to talk about how thankful it is your life. Beautifully written!
stopping by from SITS - Happy SITS day!

alyce said...

This is lovely. Congrats on your sits day!

Morgan said...

So beautiful ... I'm moved by your honesty and by the raw photos. Thanks for sharing!

Enjoy your SITS day! :)

Krista said...

Wow, how truly beautiful. It's amazing how much we miss as we try to reach goals, look to the future, or struggle with the present pains of life. I often find myself saying "life is good" to myself." I'm not sure how it started but I'm glad I'm in the habit of doing so. Who knew how wonderful it is to hear that my hubby tell me he's out of clean undies. And I'm glad to find out it's not just my hubby =D

student travel said...

Such a lovely memory are posted here. I like your picture and really that is very good time when we are remembering our memory and make a sweet laugh on that picture. And thinking what a foolish thing we did on that time. Nice way to share our memory and beautiful time with others.

Unknown said...

amazing post, really resonates with me :)

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