11 May 2011

Bloodsucking Parasites


I hate them.
Hate is a strong word, reserved in my vocabulary for only the most evil of things - liars, thieves, child abusers... and bloddy head lice.

Before you cringe and turn quickly away lest you start subconsciously itching, take pity on me and mine.
And ask yourself - have you played with us lately?
Cos if you have, you'd better check your hair, and quick.
Sorry Gail. So sorry you will now have to trawl the streets of Hong Kong and find a Chinese Lice Killer, cos Miss Fab was crawling with the things.


Monday morning two minutes before she left for school she hands me some hair ties and a brush, asks me to give her pony tails.

As I part her hair into two bunches I see a suspicious white speck. I look closer. There's a bunch of them.
Horrors!
Instantly my scalp starts to crawl. You know the feeling?

What to do? What to do?
Suddenly I recall the Robicomb I bought a while back, just in case of an infestation.
This Nit-Zapper electrocutes the little buggers.
I drag it out, switch it on and start fine-combing her hair. There's a bunch of fat mother bugs.
I keep combing.
When the comb comes up clean after a while, I scrape her hair into two bunches and give her strict instructions not to take her hair down all day, just in case.


After I send her off I turn the zapper to my own head of hair. Horrors. Bugs in my hair too.
Ugh.
I hate those things!!!!
When the kids get home I Robicomb them all again. Dash has them too, for the first time in his life.
I fossick around in my bathroom cupboard til I find my trusty Parisidose nit shampoo, or whats left of it.
Just enough to double-dose all our hair. One by one I de-nit us thoroughly. And the next day I do it all again, just to be sure.

Now, it's just occurred to me that Grandma is probably having kittens as she reads this.
Sorry Grandma - and all those of you who have never had to experience this foul plague taking over your scalp, sucking your blood and making you itch - that's just life with kids as I shall demonstrate right now...


Miss Fab, now nit-free, walks in the door from school yesterday with a cheery smile.
"Mum guess what I told for news today?" she asks.
"What did you tell for news today sweetie?" I reply expecting it to be something about kittens or butterflies.
"I told my class I have nits!" she announces airily.
"Whaaaaat??? You told them you have nits? What did your teacher say? What did your class say? Did they tease you? make fun of you? Was your teacher upset?" I stammer.
"Nah. They were fine. But at the end of news Mr McKearney asked the class who else has nits... and lots of people put their hand up."


Neato.
So you see people, We are fighting a losing battle with these bloodsucking parasites.
We can de-nit them, comb them, shampoo them, tie their hair in bunches, wash every item of bedding, every scarf and hat, coat and dressing gown just to be sure we got all the little blighters.
But then we send them off to school... and before we know it we'll have to repeat the whole bloddy process again.

Therefore I recommend having a bottle of Parisidose and a Robicomb in the bathroom cupboard at all times.
Cos you ust know you're gonna need them before too long.
*sigh*


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18 comments:

Leonie said...

blood suckers is right!!
we havent had too many problems yet but so many of my friends have.
Keeley had them once as a 3 year old.
I once had a mother from school ask me if my kids had given hers nits...no I said, why? well she said, it doenst look like you wash their hair very often (me speechless!)...anyway...the fact that my children have dirty hair (ha!) and we spray with tea tree oil might have something to do with...who knows? I won't hold my breath!!!
May the force be with you with this battle!!

Lyns said...

In less time than it takes to drive from yours, drop a kid at preschool and get home you have typed up a blog post!! Knew you wouldn't disappoint.
Urgh, nits, yuck. Just comes with having kids I think. Can't afford to be precious about it as you just never know when they might strike!! xx

Widge said...

I rekon they must only like some poeple's blood, because my eldest has had them twice and when he got them he was riddled with them...boys so much easier to give them a head shave, but funnily enough no one else in the family caught them???!! he even slept with his little bro (who had quite long hair at the time)while we were camping. So gail and the brood MAY be safe..
I actually have nightmares about myself catching them. actual nightmares. shudder
xo

PaisleyJade said...

Yep - we've had them here a couple of times this year already - and the new nit shampoo I bought was useless!!

Elizabeth said...

I got them a few years ago - TWICE, I was working in a school office and one family just kept bringing them to school, arghhhh! I was so infested the first time (having not had them since I was tiny, I had no idea what was going on originally) that we went through 3 lots of useless shampoo before discovering the tea tree oil and plastic bag trick - gross, but it worked!

Broot said...

Yep been there, done that. I don't even bother with the nit shampoo anymore. Just heaps of cheap conditioner and a lot of combing.

What I find frustrating is when my two have been nit/lice free for 2-3 weeks (so you know they're gone!!) and then come home with an adult in their hair again that's jumped off somebody else. *sigh*

jacksta said...

yucky...we havent been there yet...but maybe Ill take your advice and get the stuff needed for when it arrives.

weza said...

I scratched as soon as I saw the title of this post! Arghh Nits are such a pain. We fought the war in term one for the first five weeks and now I see a sign outside the girls class to say they are back again. GRRR hate them!!!

Jenny said...

My head itches now... oh yuck for you guys! Hope they're all gone soon!!

Neetz said...

Pediculophobia - I have this fear (headlice) lol
My son got them once not long after starting school. Kendyl thank goodness hasn't had them yet. I condition/nit comb my kids at least 3 times a week (which is a mission when your kid has hair like my little girl). It's a pain but at least we don't end up with the crawly gross things...eeek.. they truly make my skin crawl at the mere thought.. you poor poor things!!!
What annoys me is when the same ol' people at school end up with them and don't seem to do anything about it.

The South African Kiwis said...

Ah... my best solution yet has been to buy cheap conditioner, add copious amounts of tea tree oil to it, apply to the affected head and leave it on for about 20 minutes. Rinse out and then go and make up a spray bottle with a blend of tea tree oil and water, give it a shake and spritz the kids before school every morning. Get the jacket collars too.
And I keep the boys heads shaved fairly short. In fact... its' just about that time again...!

Anonymous said...

Totally agree since my oldest started school this year in March we've had them twice argh!!! I didn't like the idea of chemically lotions and potions as he has a sensitive scalp so a natural way to get rid of the things is to use tea tree shampoo and conditioner... wash hair with the shampoo and rinse then put on a decent amount of conditioner massage it in and leave it there for about 5min then pull him out of the shower and sit him infront of the tele(without rinsing conditioner) and comb them all out, time consuming yes but effective back in the shower to rinse it all out repeat the following day and continue using the teatree shampoo as the bugs dont like it and remember to wash all bed linen ect.

skymum @Pursuit of Happiness said...

Just dropping by to let you know that I have nominated you for the Kreativ Blogger award! Have a look at your nomination here: http://skymum-pursuitofhappiness.blogspot.com/2011/05/longest-post-in-history-of-blogging-my.html :)

Meghan at MNM's said...

Argh - yuck, reminds me of a post that Lish at Project Alicia did on these nasties a while back. Bane of every parents life. I first got them at eight and spread them to the entire family while we were caravanning one weekend. When we combed my hair out into the basin it went black with the lice....just thinking about it makes me itch!

Cat said...

LOL
not that I am laughing at the state you are all in
I am laughing at how intrigued I was over your title
Hope you get rid of those suckers SOON!!!!

I gotta go and scratch my head now....

love and light

Anonymous said...

Nits,nar, that doesn't bother me,what kid hasn't had them,even i had them when i was a kid, (just glad I'm not staying with you at the moment!!!) Granny Winnie xxx

Unsolicitedious Rebugger said...

Eeeeck nits are a joy we have yet to experience and I know when we do it will FREAK ME OUT! Stuff like that gives me the heeby jeebies! I will be saving this post so that if when?) they dare to enter our home we are prepared! Great photos btw, you & your family are a crack-up!

Nikki said...

I think every mum of girls hates nits!
Our school recommends conditioner and combing, as the nits build up a tolerance to the nit shampoo. Condition and comb every morning or night for ten days.
A tip a hair dresser told me was to always use hair spray... their hair stays neat and nits can't get in.
Good luck ... {itches head} ;D

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